words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey sits at a table and Chandler and Monica enter.]
Monica: What do you do with your money now?
Monica: Joe... Emus are birds. You raise them for meat.
Joey: (laughs) Yeah! Right! (points at Monica) People eat birds... Bird meat... Now do they just fly into your mouth or you go to... you go to a restaurant and you say: "Excuse me, I'll have a bucket of fried bird." (laughs again) Or... or maybe just a wing or... (realises...)
Monica: Joey, I think you should consider something a little less risky. I mean, I think in this market, real estate is your best investment.The Fed. just lowered the rates and the interest on your mortgage is totally deductible. (looks at Chandler) That's right, I know some stuff!
Monica: (very excited) Oh, and you know who's selling a great apartment? Richard!
Chandler: (imitating Monica) Oh, and you know whose knowledge of her ex-boyfriend is shocking? Monica!
Monica: My dad told me. They play golf together.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Rachel and Monica are sitting at the dinner table and Phoebe enters, knocking on the door.]
Rachel and Monica: Hey!
Monica: Wow, the boyfriend's parents! That's a big step.
Monica: They just gonna love you, just be yourself.
Phoebe: Okay, so... allright... Which dress? (she holds up two 'Phoebe' dresses, Rachel and Monica look at them... taking their time, don't wanting to hurt Phoebe) You can say "neither".
Rachel and Monica: Oh God, neither!
Monica: I'm sorry honey, but we're gonna take you shopping. It's gonna be fine.
Monica: You went out with Wallis Pincer?
Monica: I knew you didn't get a 1400!
Monica: (Monica looks at Rachel in disbelief) She said WHAT?
Phoebe: (speaking louder and articulating) That's she's like the daughter she never had. (Phoebe points at her ears) Listen! (Monica looks at Phoebe in a duh! way)
Chandler: We're not gonna have this conversation again... Look at this place. Why am I so intimidated by this guy? Pretentious art, this huge macho couch. When we know all he does is sit around all day crying about losing Monica to a real man! (laughs) You don't think he's here, do you? (Joey looks around)
Joey: Ooh! A tape with a girls name on it. It's probably a sex tape... (realises) Wait a minute... This says Monica... (looks around) And this is Richard's apartment... (realises some more)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Only Chandler is there with the videotape in his hands, standing in front of the TV set.]
Joey: You don't wanna see what I just saw! (at this moment Monica comes home, and sees Chandler flat on his back on the floor and Joey pinning him down)
Monica: What are you guys doing? (Monica hears the moaning coming from the TV and looks at it) Oh my God, is that Richard? (It only takes a split second for Joey to realise, he pulls Monica down by her jacket, and she falls, face down next to Chandler. Chandler gets up a bit, and Joey quickly covers Chandler's eyes with his hand.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's. Monica switches off the VCR. Joey and Chandler are behind the couch.]
Monica: So you stole that tape from Richard's apartment?
Monica: That tape was never meant to be seen by... (pauses) Joey I would feel more comfortable if I was having this conversation in private.
Joey: (laughs) Monica, look... I don't think you and I have any secrets anymore... (Monica keeps looking at Joey) Not ready to joke about it yet, okay, I see you later. (Joey walks out)
Monica: Why in the world would you take this tape and and why would you watch it?
Monica: Is all this about you not being able to grow a moustache?
Monica: Isn't that sad? I mean, can you see how pathetic that is? You shouldn't be jealous. You should feel bad for him.
Monica: Chandler, this is not our problem. We've got each other. That's all that matters.
Monica: Cowboy boots? I've never worn cowboy boots in my whole life! (she turns on the video again)
Monica: THAT'S NOT ME!
Monica: That bastard taped over me! (Chandler's expression changes)
Monica: I-It's just so insulting! Big spring for a new blank tape, Doctor!
Rachel: Shake it! (Phoebe, Mike, Chandler, Monica and Joey step in)
Monica: Yeah. We-we had sex and then we fell asleep.
Chandler: Its okay, I want this to be your night too. (Raises his class.) To Monica.
Monica: 'Fraid so. Brown hair, green eyes...
Woman: So, what time is Monica supposed to get here?
Rachel: (to her) Hi! Im Rachel. This is Phoebe. Im the maid of honor. How do you know Monica?
(Monica and Ross push to the front)
Monica: Toothpick?
[Scene: A Janitorial Closet, Monica and Chandler are emerging slowly.]
Monica: And?
Monica: Joey!
Monica: What are you trying on now?
Monica: What?! Which one?!
Monica: Okay. That's okay. I-I know that you're very upset right now. I know, I know that wasn't about me.
Rachel: Oh Monica, we are so sorry.
Monica: For what?
Monica: Well, its done about two minutes before it looks like that.
Monica: Well no wait a minute thats not true! No, what did, that was really sweet. And it kinda works out for the best.
Rachel: Monica.
Monica: Shrill?! The wedding is back on!
Monica: Hey, I just whipped us up some Easy Bake treats, they should be ready in about three days.
Phoebe: Yay! I love drunk Monica!
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, and Rachel are sitting on the couch and Ross is sitting on the chair, and theyre all talking.]
(Chandler and Monica enter.)
Joey: Probably Monica and Chandler.
Monica: Why don't I just take off my clothes and have a nightmare.
Rachel: (To Monica) Yes.
Monica: (To Joey) They were lovers.
Monica: Wow!
Monica: Well Im Monica Geller, ball like a baby.
Monica: Wait a minute, she isnt Shes not the one who you
Monica: (To Chandler) Okay, the red ones are my guests and the blue ones are yours.
Monica: Joey!
Monica: Why would they think theyre invited?
Monica: Rosss parents are my parents!
Monica: Oh please, you just want more blue pins.
[Rachel hands Monica a plate. Monica takes a spoonful of the whipped cream portion.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, and Ross are going over the picture proofs.]
Monica: Yeah. And yknow, if you wanna cry, thats okay too.
Ross: The Armadillo was actually not so thrilled about that part! Okay Ben, its time to light the Hanukkah candles! (Santa, Superman, Monica, Ben, and the Holiday Armadillo go over to the menorah to light the candles.)
Monica: (catching him) Chandler!
Rachel: Huh. Does Monica know about this?
Monica: Well, you don't have to decide right now, but if you could just look at our file...
Monica: Oh Joey!
Monica: Oh thats too bad. Its true, but too bad.
Monica: (looking at him) What?!
Monica: Well, what am I going to say?
(Monica gets up and heads for the bathroom, Chandler turns to watch her go and is startled to see Joey sitting in Monicas seat.)
Monica: No she hasnt.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, Monica is blowing out a candle as Chandler enters.]
Monica: I guess I set up the video camera to try and entice Joey.
Monica: 007 has a fancy car!
Monica: Hey.
MONICA: Oh, that's there on the bottom, see the manager, Chandler Bing.
Monica: The show?!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica is on the couch as Chandler disgustedly enters.]
Monica: 007 gets all the ladies.
Monica: The wedding starts at six.
Monica: Youll vamp?!
Monica: Have you ever been to one of my weddings?
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Eighth street deli?
Rachel: (as Monica) Yeah it is, mostly because I get to boss people around, which I just love to do.
Monica: Between you and
Monica: (writing on a piece of paper) Phyllis is sitting in a chair.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler, Monica, and Ross are still giving away all of their secrets.]
Joey: (entering) Hey! Uh, Monica? Chandler? Can I talk to you guys for a second?
Monica: You bought the beach house when I was 23!
Monica: Thank God! I can't watch him anymore!
Monica: All right thats it, I give up! Whatever you want you can have it! You wanna sing a song? You wanna do a dance? You want your mom stand at the Alter and scream racial slurs? I dont care!
Monica: Yeah. Anyway, he told me about your apartment. And, um, I couldn't sleep, thinking about it. So, uh, would it be okay if I cleaned it?
Monica: Oh! And dont let me leave without getting the name of that carpet guy.
Monica: Theres still so much to do. Have you written your vows yet?
Monica: No! But I know exactly what Im going to say.
Chandler: I asked myself that very question, sir. Uh, (Points to Monica) this is Monica. (Points to his boss.) This is my boss, Doug. Doug this is Monica.
Rachel: Monica what?
Monica: Thank you.
Phoebe: Oh! Yeah! (Monica glares at her.)
Monica: Those are my eyes! Those are my breasts. (Points.)
Monica: Hold it! Are you talking about Dick Clarks New Years Rocking Eve?
Monica: Its kind of an important one!
Chandler: (writing) Monica
Monica: No! You dont know the system! Therell be nobody messing with the system!
Monica: Oh yeah? When?
(Monica stands up and wobbles slightly and Chandler runs over to catch her.)
Joey: Oh, I got it! How about saying something like, "Monica
Monica: Well?
Monica: Why won't I be married when I'm 40?
Monica: Ok, hypothetically, why won't I be married when I'm 40?
Monica: What?
MONICA: Exactly. Oh, I love that I can be totally neurotic around you now. Tell me the truth. Don't you like it better now that everything on your desk is perpendicular?
Monica: Yes, you did!
Monica: You love me!
Chandler: Look, Monica
Monica: Then all your stuff would be here.
Monica: (returning) Okay! (Sets down a huge 3" 3-ring binder on the table.)
(Monica stops suddenly and turns around slowly.)
Monica: I know. (pause) I need more pie. (goes and gets some)
Monica: You wanted it to be a surprise.
Monica: Yes.
MONICA: What's to know? Buy sell, high low, bears bulls...[on the phone] Yes Manhattan...yeah telephone number of the stock...selling store.
Monica: Chicken? I could eat some chicken.