words in movies
Phoebe: Listen, I need to ask you something. Ok, you know how my step dad's in prison.
Phoebe: (her mobile phone rings) Oh, it's my wedding planner. She's driving me crazy! (she answers) Hello... Hey, ok, stop screaming! Ok? So, halibut. All right, so salmon, either way. I don't-I don't... it doesn't matter to me!
Phoebe: What harpist? My friend Marjorie is playing the steel drums.
Chandler: You look great. I'm so glad we're having this rehearsal dinner, you know, I so rarely get to practice my meals before I eat them.
Mike: Is that why your hand is pressed against my crotch?
Rachel: Oh, Monica made me send her to my mother's. Apparently babies and weddings don't mix.
Mike: Yeah look, about tomorrow, I... I've got a question for ya. I just found out that one of my groomsmen had had an emergency and can't make it.
Joey: Oh, hey, my pleasure. (he suddenly becomes very serious) So what are your intentions with my Phoebe?
Phoebe: Ok. Hello everyone and thank you all for being here tonight. So tomorrow's the big event and some of you might not know, but Mike and I didn't get off to the best start. (she reads a note). My friend Joey and I decided to fix each other up with friends so I, I... (Monica is twirling her hands in order to make Phoebe speed up her speech) oh I... hum... I gave it a lot of thought and I fixed him up with my friend Mary Ellen who couldn't be here tonight because... (Monica is tapping her watch with her finger) it's not important... she is in rehab. Anyway, so, ok, Joey said that he was fixing me up with his friend Mike, only he didn't have a friend Mike so he just brought, uhm, my Mike and, and (Monica clears her throat) but despite, you know... it got... it got good. Ok, I wanna take a moment to mention my mother, who couldn't be here...
Phoebe: And... moment's over! (Rachel, Joey and Chandler all turn and look disapprovingly towards Monica but she just shrugs it off) So, ok, uh, I can forget that. I can forget that and uhm... (she's flipping cards skipping half of them) Oh this is funny! Oh, but you need to know that to... that, to... Oh, ok, well, uhm, I (Monica is miming CUT). Ok, ok, I, ok, I.... MONICA I CAN'T DO IT LIKE THIS! THIS IS MY WEDDING! OKAY, I DON'T WANT THIS (she mimes Monica's when she was twirling her hands) OR THIS (she taps her watch) OR THIS (she mimes CUT) OK? I JUST WANTED A SIMPLE WEDDING! WHERE MY FIANCEE CAN GO TO THE BATHROOM ANYTIME HE WANTS! (pause) You know what? You're done.
Phoebe: Oh, happy my wedding day to you!
Monica: Hi. About last night... I know you are under a lot of stress and even though the things you said hurt me a little bit... My point is, uh, well, I'm willing to take my job back.
Monica: Uh-huh, but I'm sure you can handle this. I mean, I have won awards for my organizational skills, but, uh, I'm sure you'll do fine.
Monica: Mm-mh. I printed them out on my computer.
Ross: I have to talk to her about this groomsman situation, ok? I'm not gonna watch Chandler up there while I'm sitting in the seats like some chump! (he goes to Rachel's room, knocks the door and enters the room). (very fake gasp) Oh! My God! You're breathtaking!
Joey: Have a seat. (Mike sits on his bed, and Joey towers over him. He starts talking in an Italian godfather-type voice) Last night, I tried to welcome you into my family... and instead, you disrespect me... (shakes his head) I cannot allow this.
Joey: More back talk. And yes, I may be borrowing a few lines from my recent unsuccessful audition for "Family Honor 2: Thissa Time Itsa Personal."
Mike: (gets up) Joe, I love Phoebe. She's the single most important thing in my life. I'd die before I let anything happen to her.
Rachel: (not amused by his pun but forcing a smile anyway) Oh my...
Phoebe: No! We're gonna do it my way. (listens) Because your way is stupid! Alright I gotta go, I have another call, Reverend. (switches calls) Hello?
Phoebe: Oh my God, what's it doing here?
Phoebe: (starting to panic) Oh my God, everything is such a mess. Why is this happening to me?
Rachel: Well, in my defense, you were not supposed to tell each other.
Mike: Hey, I forgot my scarf.
Mike: Oh, you haven't picked yet. Oh good, 'cause I had an idea. I thought it would be fun if the third groomsman was my family dog. Chappy.
Chandler: I'm not scared. (moves towards Mike and Chappy) I'll just take little Chappy and... (he backs out) HE CAN SENSE MY FEAR. MY THROAT IS EXPOSED.
Phoebe: Uhuh, uhuh... Oh my God! This is really happening.
Monica: Okay. (in her microphone) It's zero hour. All teams execute on my count. (to all) Let's get this bad boy on the road.
Phoebe: I don't care... I'll be my something blue.
Mike: My God! Aren't you freezing?
Joey: Friends, family, dog... Thank you all for being here to witness this blessed event. The cold has now spread to my special place... so I'm gonna do the short version of this. Phoebe and Mike are perfect for each other. And I know I speak for every one here... when I wish them a lifetime of happiness. Who has the rings?
Phoebe: When I was growing up, I didn't have a normal mom and dad, or a regular family like everybody else, and I always knew that something was missing. But now I'm standing here today, knowing that I have everything I'm ever gonna need... You are my family. (She puts the ring on Mikes finger)
Mike: Phoebe you're so beautiful. You're so kind, you're so generous. You're so wonderfully weird. Every day with you is an adventure, and I can't believe how lucky I am, and I can't wait to share my life with you forever. (He puts the ring on Phoebe's finger.)
Chandler: Ah, you obviously saw my personal ad.
Rachel: OK, OK, it's my turn. (reads the answer)
Ross: (answering it) 1987, the day after Christmas, at Sean McMahons party. I played you one of my songs, yknow Interplanetary Courtship Ritual.
Phoebe: And on my way over here, I stepped in gum. ...What is up with the universe?!
Susan: How, how is this my fault?
Joey: This sucks man! The last night youre here and I lose the two most important things in my life, the foosball table and $500.
Rachel: (takes off her robe) Oh! Look what happened! {Don't get your hopes up guys, we only get to see her from the back or from the neck up. Its times like these I wish that the networks would broadcast some nudity other than Denis Franz's butt.} (In her head.) Huh, check me out! I'm in my kitchen naked! I'm picking up an orange. (Does so) I'm naked! (Goes into the living room) Lighting the candles, naked, and carefully. (She backs anything that might have a point like a candle on her body away.)
Monica: (without looking up from what she's doing) Besides tampons and salt? (Then looks) Ooh! My God! Maple candy! That's so sweet of you. (Opens the box) That's weird...it's empty!
Joanne: Well, guess who my dad's making partner in his firm? (She points to herself and they all scream again.)
Phoebe: Oh my God! I cant believe my little brother is married!
Joey: All right. But if you werent my best friend.
Chandler: Honey, you remember my boss Doug right?
Monica: Aww, the only reason you want to go out with me because my blond wig, and the big boobs, and the fact that I serve you food.
Chandler: My God! He wants to do it with Phoebe in London!
The Cooking Teacher: (To Monica) Oh! Something smells good over at Monicas station! (She tries Monicas fettuccini.) Oh my God! This is absolutely amazing! Youve never made this before?
Monica: You have to help me! Im supposed to be writing my vows and all I have is this! (Shows them what shes been working on.)
Monica: He- he pooped in my shoe.
Ross: Well I have to. Okay? If I dont, theyll take the class away from me. And I already put it in my family newsletter.
Rachel: Honey dont worry, it was my mistake.
Rachel: Well, my boss was at the same restaurant where I was having my interview and he heard everything. So later he calls me to his office and he tells me that he's gonna have to let me go, because I'm not a team player. And I said "Wait a minute! Yes I am." and I had to sit there for 45 minutes while he proved that that in fact... was true.
ROSS: No look I wasn''t right, that's what I came here to tell you. I was totally hung up on, on my own stuff. Listen, I'm someone who needs the whole security thing, ya know. To know exactly where my next paycheck is coming from buy you, you don't need that and that's amazing to me. I could never do what you do Joey.
Roy: All right, somebody show me where to plug in my box, and we'll get this party started! (he thrusts his pelvis towards Phoebe) Whaaaa... (walks back to plug in his cd player) Here? All right.
Phoebe: Well, we don't n-n-n-n-need a fireman, we'd, we'd like a good mechanic. (hears the sound of approaching sirens) Oh my God, here they come! Well, we gotta get out of here!
Rachel: Oh.... my God.
Chandler: Id carry you around in my pocket.
Ross: No, you guys, I mean my keyboards are all the way up inNo, yeah, okay. (Runs out.)
Rachel: Oh my God! (Rachel, Leslie, Kiki, and Joanne all scream and hug each other.
Joey: Uh, excuse me sir, there seems to be some sort of red crap on my cheesecake.
Chandler: Oh My God! You can do a duet of Ebony and Ivory all by yourself!
Monica: Okay. (They both jump up to head for there room, but Monica stops.) But wait, we cant. My Cousin Cassie is in the guest room, were supposed to have lunch.
Rachel: Oh my God! Was she old? Does she have a view?
ROSS: Yeah, it was, but...I get home, ok, and I see Julie's saline solution on my night table. And I'm thinking to myself, oh my god, what the hell am I doing? I mean, here I am, I am with Julie, this incredible, great woman, who I care about and who cares about me, and I'm like, what, am I just gonna throw all that away?
Rachel: Ross, you're like my best friend.
Monica: Wait. He pooped in my shoe? Which one?
Amy: Oh. Yeah. Well.. You didn't come see me when I was in the hospital when I was getting my lips done.
Chandler. Well my boss and I worked out a deal where I only have to be in Tulsa four days a week, so the other three I can be here with you.
Chandler: Nobody is opening anything ok? Look, I dont know about you guys, but I wanna see the look on Monicas face when I give her my present, and Im sure she wants to see the look on my face when I get mine. So please, please, can we just, can we put them back?
Ross: I'm fine. Just-just... having my worst fear realised...
Julie: Oh my god.
Joey: Well, okay. You were my girlfriend and we were doing the crossword puzzle. Y'know like you guys were doing last night. So, that's it. I'm in love with Monica and I'll be moving out.
Rachel: Oh. (we hear laughing from the upstairs apartment) Oh my God, is that Phoebe?
MONICA: So, I'll get candles and my mom's lace tablecloth, and since it's Rachel's birthday, I mean, we want it to be special, I thought I'd poach a salmon.
Monica: Oh my God!
Monica: Oh my God!
Phoebe: Oh my God!
Phoebe: (entering) Everbody this is Frank! This is my half-brother Frank.
Joey: (enters) Guess what? (they all look expectantly at him) I finally got that seed out of my teeth.
Joey: (reaches for hi scones) My scones.
Joey: What? That's not? (Realizes) Oh my God.
Phoebe: Oh my God! I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Which one's Demi Moore?
JULIE: And my second grade teacher was Ms. Thomas, and my first grade teacher was Mrs. Cobb.
Ross: Please, help me! I have a date tonight. It has to go well okayIm scared for my health!
Chandler: I'm still on my first. I just think you're nice.
Joey: Are you kidding me? Im great! Yeah, Im uh; Im better than great. I am good. And now that shes gone, I can uh, I can do all this stuff around here that I couldnt do before. Yknow? Like umm, I can walk around naked again. Yknow? I can uh, I can watch porn in the living room. Right? This is uh, this is good for me. Yknow? I like being on my own, Im uh, better off this way. Im uh, a lone wolf. Yknow? A loner. Alone. All alone. Forever. Whats a wolf got to do to get a huh around here?! (Chandler rushes over and hugs him.)
Rachel: Oh. Oh my God.
Carol: My breast milk is gross?
Phoebe: Oh thats good, I guess shell have a choice between my guy and your weirdo.
Joey: Yeah well thats because uh I stayed in my room. Yeah, you dont want to look in my hamper.
Joey: (on tape) Okay, so say hi to my friend and tell him that you like the hat.
Phoebe: Oh my God! Monicas just gonna kill you.
Rachel: (ecstatic) Oh my God! Its Joey Tribbiani of Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.!!!!!!!
RACHEL: "Oh, my, god."
Angela: That's because I'm wearing a dress that accents my boobs.
Chandler: Oh my God, it's that Victoria's Secret model. Something... something Goodacre.
RACHEL: Well, what about my stuff?
Chandler: I used to undress my cousin Glenn. (Monica looks at him then sushes him.)
Rachel: Oh wow, you didnt even try to unhook my bra!
JANICE: Oh, my, god.
Kathy: Oh my God, is it really that bad?
CHANDLER: Oh, my, god!
Phoebe: Yeah you're always singing "Yummy yummy yummy, I've got love in my tummy"
David: I-I... Oh I...I just wanna say uhm... if you do ever come to Minsk, that's my number (gives Mike a business card) We'll uhm... we'll party up Vladnik style. (He leaves again)
Chandler: All right, all right, Ill go sleep with my girlfriend. But Im just doing it for you guys.
ROSS: Wha--? Whoa, hey, I don't want my birthday to be the source of any kind of negative--there's gonna be a hoopla?
Rachel: Hi, uh, nothing. That horrible woman just took my machine.
Ross: (talking to himself) My God! These pants are burning up! (He's still wearing the leather pants.) (She snuggles closer.) Oh come on, she wants to snuggle now! What is she trying to kill me? It's like a volcano in here! (Out loud.) Are you hot?
Phoebe: Oh my God. You'd put that poor little creature in jail?
Chandler: I don't know. I can't--I just, I can't get her out of my head. Y'know? I mean, I'm a very bad person. I'm a very, very bad person. I'm a horrible person. (he waits for a reaction, when he doesn't get one) No you're not Chandler! We still love you Chandler!
Helena: Well I wouldnt miss it for the world. Oh! Im getting all misty here! Youd think I was having my legs waxed or something. (Goes back on stage.)
Phoebe: What am I gonna do?! What am I gonna do?! I cant call my office theyll kill me! I cant call my clients theyll kill themselves! Great, now my chest hearts.
Pete: Well, if that were true, Id dating my Aunt Ruth. And the two times we went out were just plain awkward. (to Rachel) Come on, you think she should go out with me, dont you?
CHANDLER: Nice work my friend.
Monica: You know what probably happened? Someone musta stolen my credit card.
Phoebe: Um, yeah. Look, I mean, Im not saying shes like evil or anything. She just, you know, shes always breaking my stuff. When I was eight, and I wouldnt let her have my Judy Jetson thermos, so she threw it under the bus. And then, oh, and then there was Randy Brown, who was like... Have you ever had a boyfriend who was like your best friend?
ROSS: Oh my god. You are pure evil.
Ross: No-no-no. I don't have a son named Jordie. We all agreed, my son's name is Jamie.
MONICA: (enters) Oh my god.
Joey: Ok, you know what blows my mind? Women can see breasts any time they want. You just look down and there they are. How you get any work done is beyond me.
Mr. Geller: Well Im peeking. (He peeks.) Oh my God!
Rachel: But I saved it. I put my basket on top.
Chandler: See, it pays to know the man who wears my shoes. (Joey and Ross wonder what he means) Me.
Phoebe: It's, yes, my little black book. It's got the numbers of all the guys I've dated.
Ross: My mommies love me. That's clever.
Chandler: Well, I'm gonna go home and bask in the triumph of my Central Park idea. (Gets up to leave.)
Rachel: Oh! (They enter. Rachel sees his father, lying on a bed, with tubes, drip and everything) Oh! Oh my God! Ohhh, ohhh, wow, that ear and nose hair trimmer I got him was just money down the drain, huh?
Rachel: Thanks, but I gotta go to work and get my eyes scratched out by Mindy.
Monica: That was gonna be my opener.
Monica: Thank you. My hair is very amused.
Mike: Oh she's my girlfriend. That's not just how we do it here. I got to get a break and when we come back we've got Kennethsinging "I touch myself"...I'm not here to judge!
Monica: (looking out of the window) Oh my God. You guys! You gotta come see this! There's some creep out there with a telescope!