words in movies
{Transcribers Note: This is an hour-long special episode. Which means that the first part of this episode is episode 615. The second part of this episode is episode 616. Since episodes 615 and 616 are combined into one file, thats why there is no episode 616 in the season 6 table of contents and the numbers jump from episode 615 to 617.}
Phoebe: No! Barry and Mindy.
Ross: The first time! No seriously, imagine if Carol hadnt realized she was a lesbian.
Ross: No, I just think Monica was that fat.
{Transcribers note: This is where the opening credits are, but theyre not the usual opening credits. Oh no! These credits are based on the world that would have been created had all of the above actually happened. It starts out with all of them at the fountain sitting on the couch as Fat Monica runs up and sits on the arm of the couch, tilting the whole thing towards her. It then goes on to show Rachels still a shop-aholic and with Barry. Fat Monica is sweating while cooking and dancing while eating a donut. Phoebe as the Wall Street shark smoking while on two cell phones. Then theyre dancing in the fountain. Joey entering as Dr. Drake Remoray and meeting a groupie. Chandler trying to write as a bird does its business on his shoulder and falling asleep while typing. Ross doing some kara-tay and trying to get Carol into bed. And finally, some more dancing in the fountain, them all flexing, and the turning out the lamp and shutting off all the lights bit from the first season. Just remember one thing, this is an alternate universe. Everything from every other episode doesnt apply, for instance, Ross and Rachel have no history. And in fact have not seen each other in years in this world.}
Ross: No, no-no, Ross Geller.
Ross: No, its okay. Some-some kid asked me to pick it up for him, but I dont
Ross: Uh-huh. (Steps to a random kid nearby and hands him his money.) Hey, here you go buddy. Sorry, no porn for you. (To Rachel) Okay, lets go see Monica!
Monica: Oh no! Whats the matter?
Chandler: Hey, I may have no money, but I still have my pride.
Monica: No Joey! Chandler could be your assistant! See, he could answer all of your fan mail and stuff!
Phoebe: Ohh thats so sweet! (Her cell phone rings.) Oh! Hang on! (Quickly grabs a cigarette and starts to light it as her phone rings.) Hang onnnnnn!!! (Gets the cigarette lighted and answers the phone.) (On phone.) Go!! No! No-no! I said sell when it hits 50! 5-0, its a number! It comes after 4-9!! No, its okay. Its okay, youre allowed one mistake. Just kidding, you are of course fired.
Monica: Ohhh! (Takes the plate.) No! This is my friend Rachel, we went to High School together.
Monica: No.
Phoebe: (yelling from Monicas room) No-no!! No!!
Phoebe: No! There-there was a little, a little diff in the market and I lost 13 million dollars.
Joey: I thought we talked about this. I dont like pulp. No pulp. Pulp isnt juice. All juice, okay?
Ross: Well I dont know umm, (Pause) what if we were too tie each other up? (Carols shocked and obviously doesnt like that idea.) Umm, some people eat stuff off one another. (Carol doesnt like that idea either.) Nah! Umm, yknow we-we could try dirty talk? (Carol still says no.) Umm, we could, we could have a threesome.
Phoebe: No! Its not a cigarette! The smoke is coming out of me!
Ross: (on the phone) Hello? (Listens.) No she cant come to the phone right now. (Listens.) Oh, right no problem. Okay, bye-bye. (Hangs up.)
Chandler: No, the doctors say it may kill her.
Monica: No! Umm well, some people say that Oysters are an aphrodisiac.
Monica: No-no-no, no! Its sensual!
Monica: Okay! (They kiss again and his beeper goes off.) Ohhh no!
Monica: No. Hes not a horrible guy.
Chandler: No you are not! You are sweet and wonderful and this is gonna happen for you.
Monica: No! (They both laugh.) Oyster?
Monica: I have no moves. (He moves in to kiss her and she laughs and backs away.) Okay, whatcha doin there?! (Giggles.) Oh yknow what? Im sorry, this is just too weird.
Joey: No! No! No, not after seeing that.
Rachel: No! No-no-no
Phoebe: No. Ive learned my lesson.
Ross: No! The reason Im asking is that I sorta had one last night.
Ross: No, she kept kicking me away!
Ross: No!
Chandler: Let me tell you about this chick I scored with last night! Oh no wait a minute that was you!
Ross: Umm, no.
Rachel: No seriously! Seriously! What has happened to the sanctity of marriage?
Chandler: No, there were two.
Kathy: (outside the door) No. (Chandler opens the door and they kiss again.)
Phoebe: No! No! Its just that he gave me three tickets and there are six of us!
Chandler, Phoebe, and Joey: No, I wasnt gonna ask you that, no.
Phoebe: Ewww! And "Oh no!" Itsthey just want me to be the surrogate. Its her-its her egg and her sperm, and Im-Im just the oven, its totally their bun.
Friend No. 2: Oh, isnt it exciting, I mean its like having a boyfriend for life.
Ross: You had no right to tell me you ever had feelings for me.
Ross: Yeah, it's no big deal. I mean, I just met her and I'm fine with it...
ROSS: [looking at a glass table with a panther shaped base] Look, check this out. Is it a coffee table, is it a panther? There's no need to decide.
Mary-Theresa: Its no big deal. Chandler was just kissin me because he thought I was Mary-Angela.
Monica: Okay, Phoebe, y'know what? That-thats it, thats it, all right? No dinosaurs, no ghosts, no giant dogs, okay? Theyre not the right size, theyre not Victorian, and they just dont go.
Phoebe: No, I know, this way when I go to the party later Mike will know I am over him cause I'm gonna smell like another guy. (to the shop assistant) Yeah.
Phoebe: Well, sure in a perfect world. But, no, I promised I wouldnt tell, and I swore to like all my gods.
JOEY: Alright, no peeking. No peeking, no peeking, no peeking.
Sarah: Oh, no! This is work. I should call in. Can you excuse me?
Rachel: No, wait. No there's gotta be something else that you can do. I mean, what skills do you have?
Phoebe: No! No! I'm talking you up to people. Just give it a little time, all right? Relax, get something to eat! Okay?
Ross: No, its my joke, its mine. You can call them, theyll tell you.
Rachel: No, I haven't had a chance to be alone with him yet.
Chandler: Oh, thats-thats okay, no problem. (He starts to look around her office.)
Monica: Well, now she has no eyebrows, mission accomplished.
Rachel: No, happy for you! (Hits him harder.)
Ursula: No, I sold it to a Swedish runaway.
David: No, I'm... not going to Minsk.
MR. GELLER: I may not know any of your flash dances but I'm no slouch on the dance floor.
Phoebe: No, I mean, I mean, when you're at the fifteenth date, y'know, you're already in a very relationshippy place. Y'know, it's... you're committed.
ROSS: No see now, now I can't because uh, I'm feeling too self conscious.
Phoebe: No! You don't have to do anything! Just don't tell them that we know!
Joey: Forget about it. Its no big deal.
Monica: Absolutely! (He goes to kiss her, but she stops him and rubs his head and says...) Now get out of here you!! (Pete leaves) (to the gang) Okay, Im running out of places I can touch him! Look, is there something wrong with me? I mean why am I only attracted to guys where theres no future? Either theyre too old, or theyre too young, and then theres Pete whos-whos crazy about me, and whos absolutely perfect for me, and theres like zip going on! I mean, seriously, does it sound like somethings wrong with me?!
Rachel: Let's just say my Curious George doll is no longer curious.
Joey: Oh hey, dont worry about it man. Dont worry about it, no big deal.
Joey: No! No. Umm, just myself and if they dont like me for(Laughs.) Im sorry I couldnt even get through that.
Joey: Why don't you go see Frankie? My family's been goin' to him forever. He did my first suit when I was 15. No wait, 16. No, 'scuse me, 15. (still confused) All right, when was 1990?
Rachel: No, I know, I know, and I'm sure your little boy is not going to grow up to be one.
JOEY: I don't know, I was kinda hopin' no one would ever find out.
Rachel: No! Forget it! I am not gonna ask Frank to give you one of his kids!!
Dr. Green: No, when you put your feet up in my bed, you tugged on my catheter.
Phoebe: Uhm, no. I'm gonna have my friends call me Valerie.
(Notices Ross looking at him and stops. Ross gives him his 'quiet down' maneuver. Okay, this may take a while to explain, so center this on you screen and place your hands about a foot apart with your fingers together and pointing straight up. Now take you fingers and point them at the other hand and making a 90-degree angle with each of your hands and the first knuckle counting up from the wrist. Now take your right hand, no your other right (that was for the dyslexics), and lower it a couple of inches, so that the fingers are pointing at your wrist. Now take your arms and keeping the elbows bent and your hands in front of you spread out your arms, kinda like making a bird's wing. Now hunch your shoulders over and move you hands up and down as if you are trying to tell some one to turn it down. That's Ross 'quiet down' maneuver. Well, there is an accompanying face, but I don't want to try and describe it as well.)
FRANK: No but he didn't really talk about anything.
Joey: Hey, if Little Joey's dead, then I got no reason to live!
Joey: No, it's too wrinkly to be a mole.
Roy: No, no, you're right. Who am I kidding? I should have hung up that breakaway jockstrap years ago. What am I gonna do? I mean, this has been my life for thirty two years. Taking my clothes off in front of people is all I know.
Rachel: No...oh, I feel so stupid! Oh, I think about the other day with you guys and I was all "Oh, Paolo, he's so great, he makes me feel so..." Oh, God, I'm so embarrassed!
Rachel: Oh no, I'm good, I don't wanna get that turkey smell all over my hands.
Monica: Sure, we have no money, go ahead.
Rachel: No, honey, they're not, but don't worry, because we are going to find them, and until we do, we are all here for you, ok?
Joey: No! No, that was Jack! Rachel thinks I asked her to marry me!
Susan: Oh, no, nonononono, you see what he's doing? He knows no-one's gonna say all those names, so they'll wind up calling her Geller, then he gets his way!
Phoebe: (to Monica) Here, now I don't eat chicken, so it's just noodle soup. And there's no chicken in the broth either, so it's really just... noodle water.
Monica: No! No-no theyre not. Theyre still very angry! But yknow Chandler is also half-Swedish. You know what the Swedish people are famous for? Sitting down and being quiet.
Quartet: Your no God's gift to women, that's all in your headdddd. You are just a buttmunch.
Joey: Hey Rach listen, no matter what this guy says I want you to know youre not gonna be alone in this.
Chandler: No, its not like, like Phil Spiderman. Hes a spider, man. Y'know like ah, like Goldman is a last name, but theres no Gold Man.
Phoebe: Oh, no, no, no, no. You know what, he's not into that stuff anymore. He quit for me.
Chandler: No! Smokes-A-Lot Lady blew smoke directly into my mouth. Eh-uhare you okay?
Ross: No, God no! That is no place for a woman. Those guys will grab anything.
Monica: See, this is why I told you never get involved with your assistant! And here is no such thing as keeping secrets when it comes to affairs. (To Chandler) Did you hear that Chandler? No such thing!
Rachel: No, but I was doing my thing and everything was going according to the plan!
CHANDLER: No, look, that's it, it's over, I want you out, I want you out of the apartment now.
Jill: (To Ross) And you! I throw myself at you and you say no, how gay are you?
Rachel: No honey, we're sorry, we didn't mean it. I love you. I love you.
Phoebe: No.
Monica: No you don't.
Ross: No I don't, to hell with her, she left me!
MONICA: No, if he doesn't like our cookies, too bad, I am not gonna be blackmailed. Look if worse comes to worse, it gets a little warm, we'll call it a theme party.
Ross: No, no, we will. We just wont tell her she messed up.
Chandler: No I don't! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!
Monica: No I dont know Chandler! Not anymore! Its like its like somethings changed.
Rachel: Please, no, go, that'd be fine!
Ross: (normal voice) No, go on! It's Paul the Wine Guy!
Chandler: I have no idea.
MONICA: No, a doctor of meat. Of course he's a real doctor. And he's handsome, and he's sweet, and know you'd like him. [she puts her arm around Richard]
PHOEBE: No. This whole like playing-for-money thing is so not good for me. You know, I don't know, when I sang "Su-Su-Suicide", I got a dollar seventy-five. But then, "Smelly Cat", I got 25 cents and a condom. So you know, now I just feel really bad for Smelly Cat.
ROSS: No, you, ya know there's no need to make it u. . . how?
Rachel: No we werent! It was nothing! It was one night, senior year we went to a party, had a lot of sangria and yknow, ended up kissing for a bit.
Tall Guy: No, no. Shes fair game if you ask me, sorry buddy!
Chandler: (with phone to ear, obviously hearing no dial tone) Paid your phone bill?
Phoebe: No, I know, Im just nervous. Y'know its just y'know Moms dead, dont talk to my sister, Grandmas been sleeping a lot lately. Its like the last desperate chance to have a family, y'know, kinda thing. Youre so sweet to wait with me.
Phoebe: No Im serious. I mean Im intuitive, but my memory sucks.
Rachel: No way. No way did you do this.
Joey: No, Chandler. Look, forget about it, okay? Look, I know things have been a little tight since Janine moved out. Oh, was she hot.
Monica: No! No its not! Its not gonna be okay! It sucks! No swing band! No lilies!
Joey: No Im not. Why would you say that? Thats just mean.
Hayley: no it's not ringing any bells.
ROSS: Well, there's no way I'm gonna get a shot. Maybe they can take the needle and thquirt it into my mouth, you know, like a thquirt gun.
Ross: No, this is pretty much it.
Monica: No, Chandlers still in Phase One, and Joeys that thing you smell.
Chandler: No, you don't have to, and you can't because I, I live here too.
Chandler: No, but Horny for Monica Minister called, wanting to know if we were still together.
ROSS: No, no, she's great and it's not like we haven't done anything. I mean, uh, uh, we, we do plenty of other stuff, lot's of other stuff, like uhh. . .
Monica: No it's not.
Rachel: No Paul, I dont know anything about you! Yknow, like-like your childhood! Tell me about your childhood!
Rachel: No. (She heads for the door again.)
Chandler: No, no, no... They're really yours. We... found them in your old room.
Rachel: Oh no. You went on our honeymoon alone?
Ross: No no no, go-
Ross: No no no, she gets a credit, hey, I'm in there too.
Joey: What theyre not invited?! Oh no, thats terrible! Theyre gonna be crushed!
Monica: No.