words in movies
{Transcribers Note: This is an hour-long special episode. Which means that the first part of this episode is episode 615. The second part of this episode is episode 616. Since episodes 615 and 616 are combined into one file, thats why there is no episode 616 in the season 6 table of contents and the numbers jump from episode 615 to 617.}
Phoebe: No! Barry and Mindy.
Ross: The first time! No seriously, imagine if Carol hadnt realized she was a lesbian.
Ross: No, I just think Monica was that fat.
{Transcribers note: This is where the opening credits are, but theyre not the usual opening credits. Oh no! These credits are based on the world that would have been created had all of the above actually happened. It starts out with all of them at the fountain sitting on the couch as Fat Monica runs up and sits on the arm of the couch, tilting the whole thing towards her. It then goes on to show Rachels still a shop-aholic and with Barry. Fat Monica is sweating while cooking and dancing while eating a donut. Phoebe as the Wall Street shark smoking while on two cell phones. Then theyre dancing in the fountain. Joey entering as Dr. Drake Remoray and meeting a groupie. Chandler trying to write as a bird does its business on his shoulder and falling asleep while typing. Ross doing some kara-tay and trying to get Carol into bed. And finally, some more dancing in the fountain, them all flexing, and the turning out the lamp and shutting off all the lights bit from the first season. Just remember one thing, this is an alternate universe. Everything from every other episode doesnt apply, for instance, Ross and Rachel have no history. And in fact have not seen each other in years in this world.}
Ross: No, no-no, Ross Geller.
Ross: No, its okay. Some-some kid asked me to pick it up for him, but I dont
Ross: Uh-huh. (Steps to a random kid nearby and hands him his money.) Hey, here you go buddy. Sorry, no porn for you. (To Rachel) Okay, lets go see Monica!
Monica: Oh no! Whats the matter?
Chandler: Hey, I may have no money, but I still have my pride.
Monica: No Joey! Chandler could be your assistant! See, he could answer all of your fan mail and stuff!
Phoebe: Ohh thats so sweet! (Her cell phone rings.) Oh! Hang on! (Quickly grabs a cigarette and starts to light it as her phone rings.) Hang onnnnnn!!! (Gets the cigarette lighted and answers the phone.) (On phone.) Go!! No! No-no! I said sell when it hits 50! 5-0, its a number! It comes after 4-9!! No, its okay. Its okay, youre allowed one mistake. Just kidding, you are of course fired.
Monica: Ohhh! (Takes the plate.) No! This is my friend Rachel, we went to High School together.
Monica: No.
Phoebe: (yelling from Monicas room) No-no!! No!!
Phoebe: No! There-there was a little, a little diff in the market and I lost 13 million dollars.
Joey: I thought we talked about this. I dont like pulp. No pulp. Pulp isnt juice. All juice, okay?
Ross: Well I dont know umm, (Pause) what if we were too tie each other up? (Carols shocked and obviously doesnt like that idea.) Umm, some people eat stuff off one another. (Carol doesnt like that idea either.) Nah! Umm, yknow we-we could try dirty talk? (Carol still says no.) Umm, we could, we could have a threesome.
Phoebe: No! Its not a cigarette! The smoke is coming out of me!
Ross: (on the phone) Hello? (Listens.) No she cant come to the phone right now. (Listens.) Oh, right no problem. Okay, bye-bye. (Hangs up.)
Chandler: No, the doctors say it may kill her.
Monica: No! Umm well, some people say that Oysters are an aphrodisiac.
Monica: No-no-no, no! Its sensual!
Monica: Okay! (They kiss again and his beeper goes off.) Ohhh no!
Monica: No. Hes not a horrible guy.
Chandler: No you are not! You are sweet and wonderful and this is gonna happen for you.
Monica: No! (They both laugh.) Oyster?
Monica: I have no moves. (He moves in to kiss her and she laughs and backs away.) Okay, whatcha doin there?! (Giggles.) Oh yknow what? Im sorry, this is just too weird.
Joey: No! No! No, not after seeing that.
Rachel: No! No-no-no
Phoebe: No. Ive learned my lesson.
Ross: No! The reason Im asking is that I sorta had one last night.
Ross: No, she kept kicking me away!
Ross: No!
Chandler: Let me tell you about this chick I scored with last night! Oh no wait a minute that was you!
Ross: Umm, no.
Rachel: No seriously! Seriously! What has happened to the sanctity of marriage?
Chandler: No, there were two.
Ross: No, no, thats funny. But maybe its time to move on, let it go, yknow? Stop it! Besides, Rachel is going out with Elizabeths father, so ah, hes much older than she is. Looks like Im not the only one interested in fossils, huh?
Doug: Good God Bing I well I cant say Im altogether surprised, I saw the way she looked at you, and there was no love there. And the way she looked at me, pure lust.
Joey: How can you say that?! The Mets have no closer!
Phoebe: Speaking of Christmas, umm since Monica and I are starting a new business and have like no money, umm, this year maybe we could do secret Santa, and then we each only buy one gift. And-and theres the added mystery of who gets who.
Rachel: No!
Rachel: Phoebe, no! This is, this is insane.
ROSS: It's alright, it's no big deal.
Elizabeth Hornswoggle: No.
Gary: Yeah, I'm gonna say no.
Phoebe: No! I am a positive person. You are like Santa Clause on Prozac, at Disneyland, getting laid!
All: No. No, you're not a loser.
Phoebe: Oh! No, I-I think I just had a contraction.
Monica: No, you're the best.
Chandler: No, you're the best.
Chandler: No, you're the best.
Joey: (entering) Rachels having her baby!! (Phoebe turns and looks at him.) Which is of no interest to me, Im a neurologist.
Rachel: Ehhh, no, I wanna do Phoebe's thing.
Ross: No no, about a month ago she gave her number to some guy in a bar.
Phoebe: No!! wait, wait, wait!! Oh please, hold it up so I can listen. (Joey looks at Ross and holds the phone above Rosss shoulder.)
Chandler: All right! Fine! But its just a lunch date, no more than an hour! And from now on I get my own dates, I dont want you setting me up with anybody ever again!
Monica: No Chandler no! No unscheduled stops. You can go when we stop for gas.
Ross: I just grabbed a spoon. (Ross exits and Monica has no idea what that means.)
Joey: Oh yeah, no problem.
Phoebe: No, I got in trouble for that before. Ill see you later.
Ross: No!
Ross: No.
Kathy: No, but thats bad!
Phoebe: Ooh, I love that place! (Thinks about it.) So, no.
Mr. Geller: Theres no way in hell, Im paying for it.
Ross: Wha? No no! Ah! (Ross scarfs all of his trifle down in about a second. He looks like hes going to throw up.) (Lying) All gone! So good! Maybe Chandler has some left.
Monica: No, I'm-I'm serious!
Ross: Come on you guys, it's no big deal! (He turns around and shows him his thing.)
Chandler: No way! If anything youve gotta let me win! My wife thinks Im a wimp!
Joey: (smiling) No, smile! Not that face, smile! Everybody smile! (They all smile.)
Monica: No you didn't.
Rachel: (on the phone) No, no, no, Im looking at a purchase order right here and it clearly states that we ordered the Rivera bikini in a variety of sizes and colours. And.... (listens) What does it matter, what Im wearing?! Can I please speak to your supervisor? (listens) Thank you. (to Sophie) Were holding.
Monica: No way!
Phoebe: No.
Chandler: The guy was hammered, okay? Theres no way, you look like Rosss mother.
Phoebe: Oh no!
Phoebe: Oh, then no.
Joey: No! No, you smell like a meadow. (Pause.) I'm sorry. (Runs to the bathroom.)
Rachel: No honey, it's okay! Listen, I'll got to Ross's and get the blender, you get all the margarita stuff ready.
Chandler: Are there no conscious men in the city for you two?
Frank: (hiding under a pile of clothes) Hi. (She jumps up screaming.) Wait, no! Just put the mail down. Its-its me!
Rachel: Wait! No, that's ridiculous. Come on, he lives three blocks away!
Ross: Yeah, no problem. (Tries to turn it off.)
Ross: Yeah, no one talks like that!
Rachel: No, wait. Wait.
Gary: No, Joey!
Ross: Wait a minute! No! Im the nice one! Im the one who danced with the kids all night! How How small are your feet?! (They all look down.)
Rachel: Uhh, no, no, it bothered me when he slept with other women.
Rachel: Ohh, honey no problem. Okay. (Gets up.)
Chandler: No, she's still upset because I saw her boobies.
Joey and Ross: No.
Phoebe: Oh no, none of them are the father. The father is my brother.
Cookie: No kiddin, thats the exact same drink I made myself right after I shot my husband.
Phoebe: No. No, I wont. But I should tell you this, this exact same thing happened to my roommate Denise. She moved in with a guy who was secretly married to her and he said he didnt love her, but he really did, and it just blew up! And thats how she ended up living with me! (Ross looks at her.) (Pause) Okay, thats a lie.
Monica: No, but she likes me. You abandoned her on a plane to Greece.
Phoebe: Please, right now, no, every time I see him its like Is it on the lose? Is it watching me?
Don: No. But God, a house made of cheese, wouldnt that be incredible?!
Joey: No dude, Ross tore up the tickets!
RACHEL: No.� No, because I know exactly how the conversation's gonna go.� "Hey Ross, you know, I think we had a moment before."
Ross: What? No! No! I am not gonna hide it from PhoebeOoh, although I did get some great Pottery Barn sheets! (Gets them.)
Phoebe: No, just a barrel.
Phoebe: No, nothing.
Ross: No, Ive looked everywhere!
Ross: No! No! LookHey, enough is enough! Look, I am sorry that you feel guilty or whatever about spending time with your new mom, but this is not your old mom. This is a cat! Okay, Julio the cat! Not mom! Cat!
Woman No. 2: Wow! What an unusual cat!
Woman No. 2: What?!
Woman No. 2: Okay, yeah, I just wanted a cat. (Starts to leave.)
Monica: No! Ace is low! Ace, two, three, four!
(He goes to pull up his pants, but can't seem to get them past his knees. He frantically tries to pull them up to no avail. Panic sets in.)
Ross: No! No! I didnt do that. Its just Okay, honestly no. I dont, I dont see a big future with her.
Chandler: Uh, no Pheebs. What's it look like?
Rachel: Yeah no, I mean it was at a flea market, so it was yknow, it was like a dollar.
Phoebe: For your information, this happens to be a pain like no man will ever experience.
Chandler: Yeah, its two guys in a ring, and the rules are: Theyre are no rules.
Phoebe: No thinking! No thinking! Tie or ascot?
Phoebe: No, I don't think this was your shot. I mean, I don't even think you just get one shot. I really believe big things are gonna happen for you, I do! You've gotta just keep thinking about the day that some kid is gonna run up to his friends and go 'I got the part! I got the part! I'm gonna be Joey Tribbiani's ass!'.
(Joey nods to Chandler, no way!)
Phoebe: No! No!! Its me! Its me! I-I didnt want to make any noise!
Monica: No, of course not. It's not even an issue. Cause I told him I was 22.
Chandler: No!
Chandler: No!
Joey: Dude you said, "No!"
Phoebe: No.
Phoebe: No that made me feel precious.
Rachel: No. No, not at all, not at all. I actually was gonna bring someone myself, so
Rachel: Okay, they are. (No they're not.)
Monica: No drops!
Phoebe: Oh no wait, I'm sorry, that's 'pretty dumb.'
Chandler: No, honey youre not sick! Look, I dont love you because youre organized, I love you in spite of that.
Ross: Ok, well, uh, I can maybe grab a sleeping bag, or...(There's one of those moments. They're staring at each other, no word uttered, and then she leans toward him in order to kiss him, but he ducks and avoids her more than once.) Oh, oh. (he then hugs her and when she tries to kiss him again, he stands up and she falls down on the bed). No, Rach! I'm sorry, I just don't think this, this, this is a good idea.
Joey: No!
Stanley: No.
Ross: Really? No. I mean, nah, I havent played in so long, and-and, well its-its really personal stuff, yknow?
Monica: No.
Joey: No! No, Im the minister! All right, look-look, put em both on the phone, Ill marry them right now.
Mrs. Waltham: No, Im bored with you now. Im going to cut you off. (She hangs up.)