words in movies
Phoebe: Okay, lesson one: chords. Now, I don't know the actual names of the chords but umm, I-I-I made up names for the way my hand looks while I'm doing them. (She starts to show Joey the chords. Transcribers Note: For this one you'll have to use your imagination, 'cause it would take me 50 pages to describe each one. So if you want to see them, you'll have to wait for this episode to come to a TV near you.) (Holding up her hand and then reconfiguring her hand with each name.) So then, this is Bear Claw. Okay, umm, Turkey Leg and Old Lady. (Joey tries to imitate them.)
Phoebe: Ooh, you nailed the Old Lady! (They both laugh at what she said.)
Chandler: Yeah, it was time. The old condom ring in the leather just doesnt say cool anymore.
Mrs. Geller: Not that old crow, my mother. (They stop and she kisses Monica on the cheek.) Congratulations darling.
[Scene: The next morning on the street. Ross is dancing along, Singing in the Rain is playing. Two old ladies are sitting on a bench.]
Chandler: Uh, Joey is gonna be right back. Right back! (Tries to pantomime it for her.) Meanwhile, let's-let's-let's talk about you. (Pause.) So, you're old and small.
Ross: (standing) Ok, gentlemen! Please! Aren't we a little old for this? I mean, we're scientists, right? We're academics. And most importantly I... you-you will have to catch us first. (he starts to run away with Charlie). GO, GO, GO! (the paleontologists starts chasing them)
Chandler: Well, I like that idea. Obviously! I was thinking maybe-maybe-maybe it could be a game room, yknow? I mean you can buy old arcade games like uh, like Space Invaders and Asteroids for $200, the real ones! The big-big ones!
Phoebe: Fine. (She hands her bell to Ginger and starts to take down her signs.) (The same old lady walks by again.) All right, I'll give you one pointer. Look out for that bitch. (The old lady.)
PHOEBE: Yeah, um, she was 82 years old. Her name was um, Mrs. Adelman.
(An old West style showdown starts with Joey and the Hombre Man staring each other down as the store guy slowly lets in the first customer while Joey and the Hombre Man get ready to draw. In slow motion they spot the customer, eye each other, draw, and as the customer walks into the middle Joey's bottle misfires but the Hombre Man spays it into the customer's eyes.)
Monica: No-no-no! We need something old!
Joey: Well, Chandler's old roomate was Jewish, and these are the only candles we have, so... Happy Chanukah, everyone.
Joey: Shhh! This is a museum, no talking. Right down here, (Motions to a fossilised dinosaur foot.) we have a large foot. (Sees Ross working in one of the display cases.) Uhh, and over here we have Ross Geller. (Knocks on the glass) Everyone wave Hi to Ross. Ross is one of our most important scientists, look at him, hard at work. (Ross does the old "Putting a cigarette in your ear and pulling it out of your mouth trick.") Okay, moving right along. Come on.
The Old Man: Yes?
[Ross and Chandler get up and go into Rachels old room.]
(They start to go into Monica and Rachels, their apartment is filled with all of the old Christmas trees from Joeys work.)
Monica: Ok..You know the old classics you know,You look nice? They're still ok.
Joey: Oh yeah. These are my old work pants, Sergio Valentes.
Chandler: Kip, my old roommate, y'know we all used to hang out together.
Ross: So, Dr. Green, hows the old boat.
[Cut to the jetway, the old man who the flight attendant delivered Rachel's message to gets off the plane, his wife still upset with him.]
Monica: Is-is-is that message old or new? (yelling) Old or new?! Old or new?!
Amy: You didn't want me to marry the old guy with the great apartment. Then, I tried to help your daughter to de-emphasize her flaws (frantically pointing at her nose) And suddenly I am the bad guy?
Rachel: Wait, Im not just gonna drink somebodys old coffee.
Chandler: Ooh, Lambchop. How old is that sock? If I had a sock on my hand for thirty years it'd be talking too.
[Monica and Chandler make What was that? gestures. Joey and Ross go into Rachels old room.]
Rachel: Yeah and you stretch em out with your big old clown feet.
[Scene: Rachels old room, Ross and Joey enter.]
Phoebe: But everybody sings. It's so much fun! Last time this adorable old man got out there, forgot all of the words, flipped outand everyone booed him off the stage. So funny.
Ross: I am so over Janine. I mean, yeah, at first I thought she was hot, but now shes like OLD NEWS!
[Phoebe comes back from Rachels old room.]
Ross: (on machine) "Hey Ross, it's you!" (Hits the stop button) Oh yeah, no that's-that's an old message, nobody needs to hear that.
LITTLE BULLY: Us, what about you guys? Man you really, bing, gave it to old Mr. Clean back there. He was a big guy.
Joey: (smiling) I don't know. This little, old lady lives for my career. When they dumped me off of Days of Our Lives she almost died.
Ross: Hey Pheebs, could you please not put your feet up on my new (On Rachels glare) old sheet?
Rachel: You just dont look old enough to have a twenty-year-old daughter.
Ross: Oh, come on you guys; thats funny! Yknow? Because hes needhes got like a hearing aide yknow, cause-cause yknow, cause hes all old, and
ERNIE: Bert, Bert. Bert. Hey, what happened to my friend Bert? He was here just a moment ago. Oh no, my old friend Bert is lost.
JADE: Hi, it's me. Listen, Bob. I'm probably way out of line here. I mean, It has been 3 years, and you're probably seeing someone else now, but if we could just have one night together, just for old time's sake, one hot, steamy, wild night...
Rachel: Ummm. Oh! Im sorry. (She grabs the box and offers him a piece.) Its a little old but
(With his index finger he shows her how old she is. Emma also points her finger and babbles...)
Chandler: Yes, God forbid we throw out old underwear. You-you know what? Im going to go over to Joeys.
[Scene: Rachels Old Bedroom, Continued from earlier. Monica enters the room.]
Rachel: Oh my God! Youre a 30 year old virgin!
Chandler: Yknow what? Were not sad, were not sad, were just not 21 anymore. Yknow? Im 29 years old, damnit! And I want to sit in a comfortable chair, and watch television and go to bed at a reasonable hour!
(They both go back into their old rooms and shut the doors. Of course, Chandler has to close both sections of his door.)
Paul: When I was six years old.
Chandler: Youre not gonna die an old maid, maybe an old spinster cook.
Joey: They uh director. Uhh, her. (Points to an old woman standing behind him. Who glares at him and walks off.) All right, all right, it's not a gladiator movie. I work here.
Joey: Come on man, really how old?!
Ross: No! Pick me! I dont want to end up an old maid!
Rachel: Oh, okay. Is that what you want to do? You wanna go over and give a little shout out to the old, hot chickas? Okay, lets do that Sailor Joe. Quick question though, (grabs some of the rigging) whats this called?
Chandler: An old cookie?
Amanda: Oh! Gosh! This is brilliant. Gosh, it's just like old times. I'm so happy you two are friends again!
Phoebe: (entering) Ross! How could you do that to an old man?!
(Monica closes the door and slowly walks into Rachels old and now empty room.)
PHOEBE: Why are you guys so upset? It's Old Yeller, it's a happy movie.
Chandler: Well, its like that old saying, have some sex, eat some cake.
Tag: Well kinda old, like 30.
(An old woman pushes a cart full of books past.)
Monica: Ross, shes 25 years old.
Monica: (on phone) Hello Greg? (Listens) Hi, this is Monica from the plane? Listen, the number that you gave me 853-5 (Listens) (To Chandler) That is their old number! Jennys been giving it out since they moved!
Joey: (screaming) And now Chandler! Were all gettin so old! (Looking up) Why are you doing this to us?! (Turns away crying.)
David: Wa... wa... wait! We can... call them later. Can you just... just stand there f-f-for a moment? Boy! There's an old Russian expression, uhm... it goes: Schto ya ztez vigul... ui! Roughly translated that means uhm... This thing that I'm looking at: wow!
Phoebe: No, just a regular old flying dwarf.
Rachel: Yknow youre-youre probably wondering about the old date on there.
Frank: Oh, hes so cute, he reminds me of my old dog, Tumour.
Mr. Geller: Oh look, look theres your old makeup kit!
Monica: Old?
Phoebe: (sees Rachel's face) What? Did you go to a costume party? Let me guess umm Pancho Vila? (Points at Rachel) and you're Bob Saget. (An old lady has sat down at the slot machine Phoebe was just at.)
Monica: Joey, that papers like a year old!
Ross: That is an old, Chinese woman!
Joey: Yeah, well, I couldnt find any cards, so it was either this or Strip Bag Of Old Knitting Stuff.
Rachel: Okay youre right. Ill hire Hilda tomorrow. Dumb old perfect for the job Hilda!
Chandler: Yeah, well, you wouldn't think it was cool if you're eleven years old and all your friends are passing around page 79 of 'Mistress Bitch.'
Rachel: Wow, Monica, you look just like your grandmother. How old was she there?
[Scene: The Laundromat, Rachel is fighting with that old, annoying woman for a cart.]
Chandler: Okay umm, before I meant you I had really little life and I couldnt imagine growing old with
Monica: Okay, come on, I can't get married until I get something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.
Ross: Correct. Chandler was how old when he first touched a girls breast?
Ross: Hey, 30 is not that old! Do you know how old the Earth is?
Joey: Well my old man is doing a plumbing job down there and he heard they have an opening. So, you want me to see if I can get you an interview?
Boy in the Cape: Youre a mean old woman. (Runs away.)
Phoebe: Whoa-whoa-whoa! No drinks near the bucket! Set it down over there and then you can make a contribution! (The guy starts to walk away with a hurt look on his face.) And you can leave the hurt bunny look over there too! (Her boss and a co-worker walk up.) Hi Bob! (The same old lady from before walks bye.) (To the old lady.) I thought I told you to get outta here!
PHOEBE: C'mon you guys. It's a known fact that lobsters fall in love and mate for life. You know what, you can actually see old lobster couples walkin' around their tank, ya know, holding claws like. . .
Phoebe: A little mirror that when you look into it you see yourself as an old woman.
Joey: Yeah, I figure they'll love it at the new house, you know? It has that big backyard. And then, when they get old, they can go to that special farm that Chandler took the other chick and duck to.
Monica: Thats my old dog. He passed away years ago.
Ross: It's old, it's definitely old. Didn't you hear the, the double beep?
Ross: No! No! LookHey, enough is enough! Look, I am sorry that you feel guilty or whatever about spending time with your new mom, but this is not your old mom. This is a cat! Okay, Julio the cat! Not mom! Cat!
Monica: But I figured, you know, that shouldn't change anything. I mean, what the hell does it matter how old we are.
Chandler: I have the lung capacity of a two year old. (starts to light another cigarette.)
[Scene: Rachels old room. Its pretty much empty except for a few boxes against the walls. Ross and Chandler enter.]
Chandler: yeah just some good old fashion girl on girl American action.
Sandy: Like in my last job, I met Daniel when he was three weeks old. And I got to watch him grow into this awesome person... When I left, I said: I'll see you soon... And he said to me: Skdandy... (Ross and Rachel look puzzled) That was his name for me... I'll see you every day... right in... (points at his heart, but starts to cry before he can finish his sentence. Rachel tries to comfort him, but Ross has this "you've got to be kidding me" look all over him)
CHANDLER: I don't know, Richard's really nice and everything, uh, it's just that we don't know him really well, ya know, and plus he's, ya know, old [Monica gives him a glare] -er than some people, but, uh, younger than some buildings.
Monica: No-no-no, wait! We need something old!
Monica: (giggles) Of course I have! What do you think, Im some 30 year old virgin?
Chandler: Emma, how old are you? How old are you today? (holds up his index finger again)
Mrs. Verhoeven's Daughter: It looked like we were gonna lose her this morning, but shes a tough old bird.
Monica: I can't get married until I get something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.