words in movies
Chandler: Yep! From now on its gonna be the four of you guys and me and the misses. The little woman. The wife. The old ball and chain.
Richard: Forget the platoon! The platoon is gone! (He is spitting on the hard Ps and Ts.)
The Director: Hang on a minute! Joey, you keep touching your face. Is something wrong?
Monica: (voice on answering machine) Hi! If youre calling before Saturday, youve reached Monica and Chandler. But if youre calling after Saturday, youve reached Mr. and Mrs. Bing! Please leave a message for the Bings!
Ross: (going up to Rachels closed door) Chandler? (He opens the door and looks inside and doesnt see him.) Chandler? (He checks the bathroom and still doesnt find him. He then finds a note on the counter. He picks it up and reads it.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe and Rachel are in the kitchen as there is a knock on the door. Rachel answers it.]
Joey: You know youve been spitting on me?!
Richard: Thats what real actors do! Annunciation is the mark of a good actor! And when you enunciate, you spit! (Spits on the t)
Joey: No! No! I cant! You gotta get me out of it! Ive got plans! (Spits.) Important plans! (Spits on the Ps.)
Ross: No! I talked to Joey on the set, he hasnt heard from him. I-I-I talked to Chandlers parents again!
The Director: But youre supposed to work on Monday.
Joey: Its not on my head.
Ross: Aw, yknow Yknow, maybe were-were just approaching this all wrong. If youre Chandler and-and you wanna hide, where is the last place on Earth people would think youd go?
Ross: Shes fine. She doesnt know youre gone. And she doesnt have to know, okay? Now come on, were going home.
Ross: Chandler, have you ever put on a black cocktail dress and asked me up to your hotel room?
Chandler: Depends on what you mean by we.
Monica: (getting up) Im gonna go put my make up on, we have to be at the hotel in an hour! (Starts for the bathroom.)
Monica: (entering) Whats going on?
Phoebe: (entering) Found the vest! I mean were gonna have to keep an eye on it, yknow make sure we dont lose it again
Richard: Of course! Im-Im sorry. I-Id hate you to miss anything like that on account of me. I can do this!
[Scene: The Hotel, Monicas room, Mr. and Mrs. Bing are staring at each other while Phoebe looks on.]
Joey: (on phone) Hey! Did Chandler show up yet?
Joey: Im still on the set!
Joey: No! No, Im the minister! All right, look-look, put em both on the phone, Ill marry them right now.
Joey: Hey! Dont you hang up on me! Ill marry you and me right now! I have the power!
Ross: There you go. You put on a tuxedo! Now that wasnt so scary, was it?
Rachel: Well Phoebe, we gotta do something! (They turn the corner.) Well, yknow. I mean theres no way Joeys gonna make it in time. So Im gonna through the hotel and see if theres any other weddings going on.
Phoebe: Okay. Oh but dont tell them Monicas pregnant because, they frown on that.
Rachel: Anastassakis/Papasifakis wedding, excellent! {Its a good thing Jennifer Aniston is Greek, because she had to pronounce those names. Luckily for me, they were written on a sign.}(The happy couple emerges.) Congratulations. (To the best man and maid of honor) Mazel Tov! (The rabbi emerges.) Hi! Oh, great hat. (Hes wearing an interesting hat and she takes him over to talk.) Listen umm, I need you to perform another wedding. Can you do that?
Phoebe: Whats going on?
Joey: No-no-no! We gotta go! Come on! (Joey picks him up in a firemans carry and carries him out.) Here we go.
Ross: Hiiii-Ya!! (Chandler lies back down.) Im serious! Youre not walking out on my sister!
Ross: Know whatIf somebody doesnt tell me whats going on right now
Chandler: But come on, look at how cute and small this is! So I got it to give Monica so shed know I was okay.
[Scene: The moment we waited for has finally arrived. Its time for Monica and Chandlers wedding. Weve got violins playing Every Breath You Take, weve got guests seated, and Chandler starts walking down the aisle with his parents on either arm.]
Chandler: You look beautiful mom. (His dad clears his throat.) You look beautiful too dad. I love you both. (He kisses his dad on the cheek) Im so glad you here. (He kisses his mom.)
(Ross walks down the aisle with Phoebe and Rachel on his arms.)
(Finally, Monica with her parents on her arms start down the aisle.)
Mrs. Geller: Not that old crow, my mother. (They stop and she kisses Monica on the cheek.) Congratulations darling.
Rachel: Go on! Go on. (She turns back to Chandler.)
(Chandler and Monica both turn, take the rings from Ross and Rachel respectively, and place them on each others fingers.)
(The camera zooms in on Rachel who has a very worried and frightened look on her face and she slowly takes a deep breath.)
Rachel: Okay, hold on just a second. (She grabs a camera out of the desk and takes his picture.) Im sorry, its for human resources, everybody has to do it. Could you just stand up please?
RICHARD: Monica... [He re-enters the bedroom and Monica jumps on the bed, trying to cover it.] Hey Mon, I have a question. Is Leroy the baddest man in the whole damn town or the fattest man in the whole damn town?
Chandler: Mrs. Tedlock. You're looking lovely today. And may I say, that is a very flattering sleeve length on you.
Same Mans Voice: Phoebe, come on!
Monica: Where are you guys going? Come on, one more game!
All: (simultaneously) Oh yeah! Come on! Yeah right!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler is entering numbers on a calculator as Ross reads off how much hes sold.]
Rachel: Oh, come on! You think thats gonna work on me?! I invented that!
Chandler: (trying on the jacket) Okay. Holy double-vented comfort Batman! (Finds something in the pocket) Whats this?
Chandler: Interesting, cause in my dreams, I'm allways surprisingly inadequate. (Monica pats him on his lap)
Ross: Come on! (They start to leave.)
Ross: Oh, come on you guys; thats funny! Yknow? Because hes needhes got like a hearing aide yknow, cause-cause yknow, cause hes all old, and
Rachel: Late thirties? Oh come on you guys! Is it just me? Am I overreacting to this?
Rachel: Oh no! No! No-no-no-no! No, I mean come on thats-thats crazyI mean thats crazy. So whats-whats going on with you? What is going on with you?
RACHEL: Would you let me talk. [flicks Monica on the forehead]
Ross: So, do we really have to ask whos going up on the platform next?
(She is still yanking on the bra, but it is stuck in her sleeve. Finally, she gives up.)
Phoebe: (To Ross) So whats going on with you?
Monica: Fine, Ill rub it on myself.
Ross: So honey, this morning was fun, huh? Me hopping in on you in the shower there.
Monica: I can do it, okay? Come on, lets go. (She and Ross get up)
Jen: Sure, I'll just get my coat. (There's a knock on the door.) Could you get that?
Ross: Okay, 'you' can't, or (Points to Chandler) you can't? (Chandler grabs his finger) Okay, that's my finger. (Chandler twists it and Ross goes down on one knee) That's, that's my knee. (To Central Perk) Still doing the play. Aaah!
Phoebe: Now (Starts singing again) "Who will perform the ceremony! Who will perform the cer(Chandler enters and grabs her guitar and closes the door behind him)Ohoh! All right, Ill pound on him in the morning.
Ross: Fine. Youll-youll watch it on video when we get back.
CHANDLER: Oh, come on. I can never get a girl like that with conventional methods.
Phoebe: Im, Im freaking out! Monica kinda trusted me with something and she shouldnt have! All right, I havent lived here in a while, so I have to ask you something. Does Monica still turn on the lights in her bedroom?
[Scene: Joey's apartment, the next morning, Rachel is passed out on the couch.]
Ross: Or you can sit with him on the front porch and make sure no one steals the trash cans. He does that every week too.
Rachel: (speaking to the person on the phone again) Yes, yes. I still want my daughters picture, but on a bunny cake. Yellow cake, chocolate frosting with nuts!
Monica: (to everyone) It's Chandler! (on phone) Are you OK?
Monica: Okay, fine. Let's talk about snow. -- Do you think it's snowing in Tulsa, where my husband is having sex on a copying machine?
Chandler: That's good! I liked it, they didn't. (he sees Joey out of the window hitting on a girl) Joey, for God's sake, go to work! (Joey runs away).
(Rachel picks up their phone and the ringing stops. As she talks on the phone, an elaborate visual gag is spun out which is too difficult to describe in words.)
[He kisses her on the cheek, she returns the kiss, then they embrace in a full on kiss]
Tag: It wasnt on your list, but hopefully youll think its really fun.
RACHEL: Look, Chandler, he has moved on, OK, you have to too.
Chandler: I love you too. (Monica and Chandler kiss. He turns to Joey.) And... I like you as a friend. (They hug and pat each other on the back.)
Rachel: No! Wait! Come on!
Phoebe: Oh, hey, hey Nick the boxer lets see what you got. All right ya, put em up. Come on. (they start shadow boxing)
(He shifts on the couch and a ripping sound emanates from his lower regions, the sound reminds one of a brief explosion of gas. In other words, it sounds like he farted. She has a look of horrific wonderment, wondering "Did he just fart?")
Elizabeth: No, let's just leave the lights on.
Monica: (to Phoebe) You start working on that list. (She grabs her coat and leaves, too.)
Rachel: Ohh, okay. (Ross has a sign on his back that reads Poop.) WhAh-ha! (Ross stops and turns.) Wait a minute. Uh Ben, I cant do it.
Monica: What are you talking about? (Pointing out the window.) She obviously lives on the second floor, seventh apartment from the left!
Joey: What the?! (Joey pounds the table and starts yelling at Rachel, and which is drowned out by applause. Rachel is desperately trying to tell Joey that hes on TV right now. He finally notices and he does his gracious loser face.)
RACH: No, actually first they started on my waist. And then, they slid up, and then, they were in my hair.
[Scene: That same plane cabin, Ross is working on a crossword puzzle and Rachel is asleep against his shoulder. She shifts a little bit and Ross suddenly gets an idea. An evil idea when he looks at his pen. Then we have a little time lapse, the plane has landed and everyone is disembarking. The flight attendant is saying bye-bye to everyone.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Monica are entering. Phoebe and Joey are sitting on the couch.]
Ross: (answering it) Uh-oh, saved by the bell. (On phone) Hello?
Monica: Youre on the phone!
[Scene: Tattoo parlor. Phoebe and Rachel are deciding on tattoos.]
Rachel: Oh! I do not remember him! Wow! He's really got that sexy, smoldering thing going on. (We see Will angrily staring at Rachel.) Oh my God, hes Look at the way hes just staring at me. I think hes trying to mouth something to me, but I cant make it out. (Will mouths, "I hate you.")
Monica: Yeah, she's here. Hold on a second. (She hands the phone to Phoebe.)
Kim: (to Nancy) So, okay! So you'll come with me on the Paris trip.
Chandler: Yeah. Either that, or you just turned him on and sent him off to a stripper.
Monica: Wow! So, now youre going on a date with this girl?
Rachel: Okay! (She jumps on the bed.)
[Scene: A street, Ross is walking with Elizabeth on their date.]
Joey: Aw, come on! It'll be years before I forget you!
Phoebe: Yknow what Joey left on my pillow?
Rachel: Oh, Phoebe, are you still on hold? I was supposed to call my Dad back like two hours ago.
[Cut to Joeys, hes on the phone.]
JOEY: (pause) Yeah, you could go to the game with me, ah, even though I know you said you couldn't.� But then you lied to me and tricked me and gave me a bump on the head.
Rachel: Aw, Mon...(Kisses her on the cheek)
Hillary: You know, I rarely connect with someone this much on the first date.
(She gets to Monica who has the dress balled up in one hand and is sitting on Megan who is sprawled out on the floor.)
Chandler: (singing) Bermuda, Bahama, come on pretty mama
Monica: (panicked) Oh wait! You didnt just sit on my Kit-Kats did you?!!
Chandler: Then we will sprinkle rose pedals on the bed and make love. Not just because its romantic, but because I can!
Joey: Actually, tomorrow night kinda depends on how tonight goes.
Joey: Come on man! (To Gary) Listen so uh, are you gonna squeeze the perps shoes a little bit before he lawyers up?
Rachel: (turns around) Mark? Oh my God! (puts the box on the chair and they hug each other)
Phoebe: Ooh, hey, could we put on the news? I think it might be raining.
Chandler: (laughs) She was working on Valentines Day so were celebrating it tonight.
(They leave on the tour and Rachel goes to follow them but Phoebe stops her and drags her into the kitchen.)
Joey: Uh-uh, excuse me, I do have to interrupt on Rosss behalf. I-I think the rule applies here yknow, since she has a chance to get on broad back
Ross: Okay, okay! Im going. Im going. (goes across the hall to knock on another door.)
Monica: Oh my God! (She goes to hug him, stops short, and hits him on the shoulder.) Where the hell have you been?!!
JOEY: What? I have seven Catholic sisters. I've taken care of hundreds of kids. Come on, we wanna do it, don't we?
Phoebe: What did you do on yours?
Monica: I mean I have not been picked on this much since kindergarten and they had to bring in someone from junior high to do the see-saw with me. (Joey laughs and Monica glares at him.)
Phoebe: Ooh, technically you owe me $600 for sending out happy thoughts on your last ten auditions.
Phoebe: I dont know, I dont know, I dont know. You know, I mean, on the one hand, Mother may I? But yknow on the other hand No. No, I cant. Were friends. No, oh, no. I dont want to risk what we have.
PHOEBE: Yeah, maybe, yeah. You know, and, and I'll knock on the door and, and he'll hug me and I'll have a dad. Ya know and I'll, I'll go to his pharmacy and everyone will be really nice to me 'cause, you know, I'm Franks daughter.
Rachel: I cant let him go out that way, hes got a meeting. (To Ross) Youve got something here on your back.
Monica: I was laughing. (Patting him on the knee.)
Rachel: Oh, look at the little cat! [a small kitten is on the roof behind Ross] Look at it!
Monica: Ahhh! You are on my list.
Joey: All right. Hey Rach, while you're in there, throw something on Alicia Mae.
Phoebe: (tremendously overacting) Fine! Ill do it without you! (Joey gives her thumbs up) I dont need you or anybody else! Im gonna make it on my own! (Joey closes the door to his bedroom.) Youll see!! Youll all see!!
Chandler: (Picking up a pillow.) Yeah, is this your pretty pink pillow on the couch?
Ross: (on the phone) Yes, hello. I have a question. Umm, I used your pen to draw on my friend's face. (Listens) A beard and a moustache. (Listens and laughs) Thank you. (Rachel turns around and glares at him.) No, she didn't think so. (Listens) I know it's like (turns and sees Rachel staring at him and quickly changes the subject) anyway, umm well make-up didn't cover it and we've tried everything to get it off and nothing's worked. What-what do we do? (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Oh! Okay. (Listens) Okay, thank you! (Rachel gets excited at his tone.) (Hangs up the phone) Yeah, it's not coming off.
Joey: Thank you. Cha-ching! (Chandler starts to leave) Oh, well hello Mr. Lincoln. Better luck next time buddy. (Chandler leaves and closes the door) And the drinks are on me!
Ross: Come on! (They go to the jetway, Ross hands the tickets to the gate agent.) Here.
Chandler: Ah, look on the bright side, I mean you won't have to live with this ugly chair! That was here already huh? I love you. (they hug again)
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Joey are living here and Ross is writing on the Magna-Doodle when Rachel opens the door causing the door knob to hit his hand.]
Joey: Okay, Im all right, okay, but hey, could you just leave your lips? (She kisses him on the cheek and starts to leave.)
Ross: Okay, come on! All right, I gotta go! So good luck at the party. Okay?
Joey: See look, women, carrying the bag. (He puts it on his shoulder and looks at himself in the mirror and likes what he sees.) But it is odd how a women's purse looks good on me, a man.