words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Chandler enter, the others are sitting on the couch.]
Chandler: Well, it's just with uhm, work and the stress of adoption, we just don't feel like we have the energy. Plus, we don't think it's fair that every year the burden falls on us.
Monica: You guys, I ordered some chocolate pies from that bakery on Bleecker. Could you pick them up for me?
Rachel: Where am I gonna get a cowgirl outfit on Thanksgiving?
Monica: Okay, I'm gonna go check on something across the hall. You start by washing these (she gives Chandler a bowl with cranberries. Then, while she's going outside, she sees him with a bottle of soap in his hands) Not with soap!! (she leaves)
Rachel: Phoebe, I think... It's just too weird, I just saw a one year old running around with pantyhose on!
Rachel: Oh, Phoebe! Come on! You know what, it's already three o'clock and they haven't even gotten to Emma's group yet. We gotta go, we got dinner!
Rachel: No Phoebe, I am not letting you put makeup on my baby!
Joey: Yeah. I am sorry he's not here too, but I got to say, (takes some nachos from a plate on the seat where Chandler should have been) I am really enjoying Nacho Chair.
Ross: I know, I know! When I was here for Holidays on Ice (Joey looks around worried hoping no one heard that) I was sitting so far away Michelle Kwan couldn't read my banner!
Joey: Okay. Rachel and Phoebe are already there, okay? So they probably started without us. We could just slip in and no-one needs to know where we were! (he raises his hands and on his right one there's a Rangers foam finger)
Joey: Oh, no, no, no, no, no. You just want to put it on your hand!
Joey: We figured we could be late because you guys were gonna be on time (he points the foam finger at the girls)
Phoebe: And it looks like she put makeup on her!
Joey: All right. Hey Rach, while you're in there, throw something on Alicia Mae.
Chandler: (peeping) Everything is so distorted! Looks like Joey has a giant hand! Which says "Rangers" on it. They went to the game!
Phoebe: We're just... we're trying to figure out an excuse. Hey! Ooh! How about this: We can say that Monica told us 5 o'clock, not 4 o'clock. That way we're right on time! (Others start to agree but she continues) OR... or, we can plant PCP in the apartment and call the cops on her.
Rachel: You know what, we just say that she said it was 5 o'clock. We'll just act casual. We're not late, we're right on time. (When she finishes talking, a note is pushed from under Monica's and Chandler's door, into the hall. Ross picks it up and reads it out loud)
Phoebe: Well, I'm not going in first. I bet that vein on Monica's forehead is popping like crazy.
Rachel: Alright, enough, enough, come on. Let's just all go in at the same time.
Ross: Wha...? Oh sure, now they lock it, but when they're having sex on the couch, its like: "Come on in, my butt is surprisingly hairy".
Rachel: Alright, come on... (starts to knock on the door) Alright, you guys. We're so sorry we're late. Please let us in, so we can have dinner together.
Ross: Come on you guys, we're sorry, alri...? Our subway broke down.
Ross: (to Joey, who is wearing a blue, 3 foot hand) FOR THE LOVE OF GOD TAKE IT OFF!! (takes it off his hand and throws it on the floor)
Rachel: You guys, come on, it doesn't matter why we're late. We're all here now, please let us in so we can have some of your delicious turkey. (A slice of turkey on a piece of aluminum foil is slid under door)
Chandler: Please let me stay on this side of the door.
(Rachel finally manages to open the door, but the door chain is on.)
Joey: Come on you guys, we want you to know we're (His eye widen even more) very very sorry. (Monica and Chandler are now covering their eyes with their hands) (then to the others in the hall) Right guys?
Phoebe: Come on you guys, let's just do our own Thanksgiving.
(And he starts licking the grease which trickles down his face. Monica also squirts some on the other side of his face, and his tongue follows her movements.)
Chandler: (sarcastically) Oh, I left them on my bulldozer... I don't have tools!
Chandler: Okay, look, I'm gonna pull on the door and you guys push as hard as you can. Maybe we can get enough room to wiggle him out, okay? Okay, so PUSH!
Chandler: Come on guys, PUSH!
Joey: Yeah! Come on!
(The chain breaks loose from the wall, and because Joey was pushing with all his might, he propells into the kitchen, towards the table with all the food. This table has wheels underneath it, and when Joey falls on this table, he rides into the living room, with all the food falling off, until finally Joey also falls off... Joey gets up quickly, a bit agitated, and acting as nothing happened. He is covered in food stains.)
Chandler: What's going on?
(They all cheer and Rachel, Ross and Phoebe join in for a group hug. Joey also joins, but he stands back a bit, because he is all sticky of the food on him)
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. The table is set, and there's food on the tables again. They're all there, toasting.]
Phoebe: You wanna be on my list too? Keep talking! Has anyone seem my list by the way?
Priest on TV: We are gathered here today to join Joanne Louise Cunningham and Charles, Chachi-Chachi-Chachi, Arcola in the bound of holy matrimony.
Chandler: There is not one hair on that head.
Rachel: (on the answering machine) I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, but I need to get off the plane, okay? I need to tell someone that I love love them.
Ross: Yes. And another time after that. Boy Im getting hungry! Hey Joey, have you ever been so hungry on a date that when a girl goes to the bathroom you eat some of her food?
Joey: Well, y'know those special skills I have listed on my resume? I would love it would be great if one of those was true.
Jay Leno: (on TV) Y'know, don't take this wrong, I-I just don't see you a-as a mom, somehow.. I don't mean that, I don't mean that bad...
MR. GREENE: You work and you work and you work on a boat...
Rachel: Come on you gotta have one!
Joey: (on cell phone) Im sorry I gotta cancel tonight baby
Joey: Yeah! Good night! (they give each other a small kiss on the mouth, and stare at each other for a while)
MONICA: Ok, all right. It was an accident, I swear, all right. I was putting on my jacket, and the thing, and the lamp, and it broke.
Ross: Come on, Pheebs lay off him.
Phoebe: (To Chandler) You're kinda stepping on the song. (She gets ready to play but is stopped by )
Joey: A date?! No, no Pheebs you-you must be mistaken, because I know you wouldnt schedule a date on the same night you have plans with a friend!
Chandler: (on phone) Hi! Im back. (Goes to hang up the phone.) Yeah, that sounds great. (Listens) Okay. Well, well do it then. (Listens) Okay, bye-bye. (He hangs up the phone and turns around to see Joey standing close to him and screams.)
(She starts pushing the power button on the remote, but it's not facing the TV so it doesn't work.)
Joey: Oh man, pizza? I like pizza. (makes like he is trying to send a telepathic message to Rachel) Put olives on the pizza.
Rachel: Well, I was kinda supposed to be headed for Aruba on my honeymoon, so nothing!
Molly: Sure, I'll go check on Emma.
Danny: Oh, damn! I got it on my pants.
Chandler: (examining the cake) Okay well, this side looks bigger. Uh Theres more crust on this side. Yknow? So, maybe if I measured
ROSS: Ok, dinner's on.
Joey: Ah-ha-ha, you guys owe me big time. (He walks into the kitchen and does a little dance step on the way.)
Lydia: Look, look at your man, Ewing. Nice shot. You know what, he couldn't hit water if he was standing on a boat.
[Three slow knocks on the door.]
Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Come on, come on, what. You took his underwear?
[Later, in the living room, Rachel is sitting on the couch, Ross is on the chair.]
Ross: Okay, now hold on. Joey, why, why can't you just wear the underwear you're wearing now?
Joey: There was chocolate on the three. It looked like an eight, alright?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Ross and Monica are still going on about the house.]
Phoebe: Okay, we're on it. We're on it.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel has just gotten home and is going through the mail. She finds something that's Monica's and goes over and knocks on her closed bedroom door.]
Chandler: What? No, I want to watch this. (He turns on the television and the screen is completely covered in snow). Did your cable go out?
Phoebe: Oh yeah, come here. (Puts a little wax on Joeys arm and puts a strip on it.)
Wayne: C.H.E.E.S.E. is right here. (He puts on his headset, picks up the controller, and wheels C.H.E.E.S.E. in. C.H.E.E.S.E. is just a plain old robot on tracks; he kinda looks like No. 5 in the movie Short Circuit.)
Rachel: Well umm, that one is pretty but uh, I just, I just love this fabric (On the other one.) Sorry.
Ross: Filming Rachel is not something I planned. Okay look, heres what happened, and Joey you-you can back me up on this. All right, about-about a month and a half ago I came to you with a problem? Umm, a personal thing.
[Cut to Las Vegas, Joey is on the phone and wearing his gladiator costume.]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is balancing a mini hockey stick on his hand as Chandler enters from his room carrying a bunch of bills.]
Monica: Joey is having a secret Days Of Our Lives party up on the roof!
Joey: Come on man, just-just let the girls stay, Ill do whatever you want.
Ross: (he takes a baby blue beret out of a shopping box and puts it on) How does this look?
Joey: Are you kidding me? Im great! Yeah, Im uh; Im better than great. I am good. And now that shes gone, I can uh, I can do all this stuff around here that I couldnt do before. Yknow? Like umm, I can walk around naked again. Yknow? I can uh, I can watch porn in the living room. Right? This is uh, this is good for me. Yknow? I like being on my own, Im uh, better off this way. Im uh, a lone wolf. Yknow? A loner. Alone. All alone. Forever. Whats a wolf got to do to get a huh around here?! (Chandler rushes over and hugs him.)
Joey: Oh come on! Just pick one! Between Monica, Phoebe, Chandler, and Ross if you had to, if you had to, who would you punch?
Mark: Ive kinda of had this ah, this crush on you. (Rachel is shocked) But since you were with Ross, I-I didnt do anything about it. But, now that youre not, Id really like to ask you out sometime. So-so thats-thats what Im doing, now.
ROSS: [enters] Oh my God, what's goin' on?
Joey: Well, I'm starting to make good money on the show and I'm thinking... I should probably do something with it.
Phoebe: Oh, oh! It's on again!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, with the puppy, Monica, and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
Chandler: Well, maybe you can get in on a beauty scholarship.
[Scene: The Waiting Room, Monica is on the phone with her mother, Chandler is standing behind her.]
Rachel: (To Monica) Im okay! Im okay! (She knocks on Mr. Heckles's window.) Mr. Heckles, Mr. Heckles could you help me please?
Phoebe: I dont know, it would totally depend on her coloring and (realizes) You got the job!!
Ross: Rach, come on, I’m not gonna wear any of this! (he picks up a shirt) Nothing silver. (Rachel sighs). Ok? Nothing with hair! (Rachel sighs again) And nothing with padlocks on it! (Rachel heaves a long disappointing sigh).
Ross: Oh my God, you've got a crush on your sister's stalker.
Doctor Connelly: Above all, even though your chances of conceiving through natural means aren't great, you never know! So, keep having sex on a regular basis.
Monica: (hearing that) Thats it big girl! (Hits Janine in the butt with the garbage bag) Come on!
Joey: Have a seat. (Mike sits on his bed, and Joey towers over him. He starts talking in an Italian godfather-type voice) Last night, I tried to welcome you into my family... and instead, you disrespect me... (shakes his head) I cannot allow this.
Phoebe: Ok, somebody is on their way to ruin wedding okay. And I have to warn somebody, alright. So if you dont give me that number then Im going to come over there and kick your snooty ass all the way to New Glocken..shire.
Frank: Oh come on we went, we went to Time Square, we found ninja stars, I almost got arm broken by a hooker...
Ross: OK.... um, a weird thing happened to me on the train this morning...
(He kisses her on her shoulder, then her neck, then the side of her face, then just before he kisses her on the lips....)
Phoebe: Yeah, well, everybody does! Im a really cool person. And y'know you had 29 years to find that out, but you didnt even try! Y'know what, you walked out on me, and Im just, Im gonna do the same thing to you.
Phoebe: Please, right now, no, every time I see him its like Is it on the lose? Is it watching me?
Dina: Look, Rachels told me how much easier youve made all this on her. Why cant you do that for me?
Chandler: (on phone) I love you too.
Monica: Is that that couple on the first floor? Because we should get a baby before them. Yeah! That guy tried to sell me drugs. (Laura looks shocked)
Chandler: Oh please, you are obsessed with babies and-and marriage and everything that's related to babies and-and marriage! I've got an idea, why don't we turn down the heat on this pressure cooker?!
Rachel: What about you honey, who would be on your list?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Chandler are on the couch as Joey enters with his new bag.]
Chandler: Okay, well it this bed isnt new, how come there is plastic on the mattress?
Rachel: No! Joey please! Please dont! Please dont leave like this! Now come on, you cannot do this to a pregnant woman! (Starts to cry.)
Chandler: Oh, that's not true. You had an impact on me, I mean, it's 15 years later and we're still best friends. Doesn't that count for something?
Chandler: Whats going on?
MONICA: So on this road trip, did you guys win any money?
Woman: Yeah, well, I had a 24-inch waist. You lose things. Now come on, get outta my way.
Rachel: Come on!
Chandler: Okay, on three. One....Two....
Joey: So we are going on two?
MINDY: Well uh, after you ran out on your wedding, Barry's parents told people that you were sort of....insane.
Isabella: Come on! (grabs the list)
Phoebe: You didnt leave lipstick marks on the phone.
Mike: (puts on a fake smile) Where else would lame Mr. No Balls hide it? (he takes the ring from the cake, and cleans it with a napkin)
[Since they're alone they start kissing and Ross's hands work their way down until they're on Rachel's butt. Rachel starts laughing.]
Rachel: Oh man! This is so great! I actually feel like Im going on a real date! Although, I have a hint of morning sickness, and Im wearing underwear that goes up to about (She snaps the waistband on her underwear that is just slightly below her breasts) there.
Rachel: Uh well, y'know what? I don't think if I feel comfortable stealing on my very first day
(Ross and Chandler have stunned looks on their faces as Kathy and her co-star start making out.)
Phoebe: (Monica is yanking on her bra strap) Bras! We bought bras! We bought bras.
[Scene: Rachels outer office, Tag has finished searching his desk and Rachel comes out to try to plant the folder on the desk.]
(Rachel sits on the window seat, and knocks against it)
Chandler: Y'know, if you're gonna work late, I could look in on him for you.
Rachel: How do you think this suit would look on an assistant buyer at Bloomingdales?
Monica: You do know that was me who just said that right? (He doesnt respond and she turns on the light, waking him.) Hey. As long as were both up
Monica: I thought I was making headway, everyone was smiling at me all day, I get off work and I find out that they wrote this (puts on her chef hat) on my chefs hat. (The hat says Quit, bitch)
Ross: Thanks. (kisses her on the lips)
Phoebe: And youre so sweet. (kisses him on the other cheek) And youre kind (kisses him on the lips)
(Phoebe jumps on to the table and lays down, Ross follows her and hits his head on the light hanging over the pool table.)
RYAN: [Comes out of the bathroom, also with oven mits on his hands.] Well that wasn't easy.
Phoebe: You have chalk on your face.