words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there but Chandler. Phoebe runs in, excitedly.]
Phoebe: Hey you guys! Chandler's coming and he says he has, like, this incredible news, so when he gets here, we could all act like, you know...
Phoebe: Never mind. But it was going to be really good.
Phoebe: So was it a lot more money?
Phoebe: Oooh! I have something you can do! I have this new massage client... Steve? (pause) Anyway, he's opening up a restaurant and he's looking for a head chef.
Monica: (taps Phoebe on her shoulder) Um... hi there.
Phoebe: Hi! (turns back to Chandler, then to Monica) Oh, yeah, no, I know. You're a chef. I know, and I thought of you first, but um, Chandler's the one who needs a job right now, so....
Phoebe: (to Monica's tapping) Yeah, yeah!
Phoebe: Well, he wants to do some ecclectic, so he's looking for someone who can, you know, create the entire menu.
Phoebe: Yeah, I know! (turns to Chandler) So, what do you think?
Chandler: Thanks, Phoebe. But I just don't really see myself in a big white hat.
Phoebe: OK. (pause) Oh Monica! Guess what!
Phoebe: Where are you going, Mr. Suity-Man?
Phoebe: Ooh! Brian's Song!
Monica: So anyway, I'm cooking dinner for him Monday night. You know, kind of like an audition. And Phoebe, he really wants you to be here, which will be great for me because then you can 'ooh' and 'ahh' and make yummy noises.
Phoebe: (as though Rachel wasn't paying attention) Yummy noises.
Phoebe: Ooh! I know what you could make! (runs over to join Monica and Rachel in the kitchen) I know! Oh, you should definitely make that thing... you know, with the stuff? (Monica doesn't know.) You know, that thing... with the stuff...? OK, I don't know. (sits down)
Phoebe: Oh, is this the bug lady?
Phoebe: That's so great! 'Cause you already know how to do that!
Phoebe: Ten dollars an hour for what?
[Scene: Chandler's new window office, he is showing Phoebe around.]
Phoebe: (excited) Wow! It's huge! It's so much bigger than the cubicle. Oh, this is a cube.
Phoebe: Oh! You have a window!
Phoebe: Oh look! That guy's peeing!
Phoebe: (sitting) OK.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, later. Rachel is waitressing, Monica is cooking. Phoebe walks in with Steve (Crystal Duck winner Jon Lovitz).]
Phoebe: (overemphasizing) Mmmmmm! Everything smells so delicious! You know, I can't remember a time I smelt such a delicious combination of (Monica signals her to stop) of, OK, smells.
(They leave on the tour and Rachel goes to follow them but Phoebe stops her and drags her into the kitchen.)
Phoebe: (whispers) In the cab, on the way over, Steve blazed up a doobie.
Phoebe: Smoked a joint? You know, lit a bone? Weed? Hemp? Ganja?
Phoebe: Yeah! You know all those yummy noises? I wasn't faking.
Phoebe: You guys wanna try and catch a late movie or something?
Phoebe: How's this? (presses down hard)
Phoebe: Sorry. How about over here? (presses down hard again)
Phoebe: See, that just means it's working. Does this hurt? (presses down elsewhere)
Phoebe: What about this? (she starts using her elbows on his back, he yells in pain)
Phoebe: There you go! (She continues to work him over with her elbows and he continues to yell in pain.)
Phoebe: You have chalk on your face.
[Sequence 2: Phoebe throws the ball, and its intercepted by Joey, who starts to run up field. Rachel jumps on his back in order to try and tackle him, but she doesnt slow him down. Monica and Phoebe then both grab her legs in order to stop Joey, who still manages to fight through the tackle and score the touchdown.]
Phoebe: (interrupting) No, I mean I was really acting my ass off.
PHOEBE: You guys are so pathetic, I, oh, OH, XANADU! OH.
[Scene: Madison Square Garden. Mike and Phoebe are walking to their seats.]
PHOEBE: Didn't it like totally speak to you?
Phoebe: Come on Mon, let her throw the ball.
Phoebe: No youre not, youre wondering which cushion it is.
[Scene: A hall on the floor where Chandler works. Chandler and Phoebe enters, and overhears some employees's conversation. One of them is doing Chandler.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Joey are eating Thanksgiving dinner.]
PHOEBE: Hey. Watcha guys doin?
Phoebe: Yeah, it's weird. I can't help it though he's so sweet, he's like this little puppy dog, y'know? But like a really tough one that shots bad guys. Ohh, I just love beginning parts of relationships, y'know?! You just like can't keep your hands off each other.
Phoebe: Um, perhaps. Yes! Yes, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I was just afraid that you were still hung up on my sister.
Phoebe: Really?
Phoebe: Hi, yeah, hi! I'm umm, Phoebe Buffay, and I have babies coming out of me.
Phoebe: No! Because hes in love with the British chippy! Look, Rachel, if you go, youre just gonna mess with his head and ruin his wedding! Yknow, its too late! You missed youre chance! Im sorry, I know this must be really hard, its over.
Phoebe: Hey, are you going to find out the sex of the baby?
Phoebe: Umm, this stuffing is amazing. Do you think we should bring them some?
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross and Phoebe are sitting on the couch.]
Phoebe: I just asked you.
PHOEBE: The voice woman. Ya know, I mean, she has a great voice but she doesn't have a video.
Phoebe: Yes.
Phoebe: Oh this is so ho-o-ot!
Phoebe: Destiny.
Phoebe: So, what happens to the old guys?
Phoebe: I never had a bike of my own.
Phoebe: Yeah, I wouldve except I had a big spaghetti stain on the other side.
Phoebe: Chandler what are you doing?!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's Apartment, everyone's there; Phoebe recites the last verse of a poem to Joey. This poem is known as "The Night Before Christmas" by Clement Clarke Moore, but it seems that it's rather "Account of a visit from St. Nicholas" by Henry Livingston.]
Phoebe: Its not like we-we know each other or anything. Or that have anything in common.
Phoebe: Yeah, after this, I think he'll be doing that himself.
Phoebe: This is nice. We never do anything just the two of us.
Phoebe: Why would you start again after chewing all that quitting gum?
PHOEBE: Oh, it's like a skit.
Phoebe: Whoa!! He is soo unreasonable! God, although I think I understand what he means. Oh my God, this is like 60 Minutes, okay, when, when, at first youre really mad at that pharmaceutical company for making the drug and then y'know you just feel bad for the people because they needed to make their hair grow.
Phoebe: Gnight, bro.
Phoebe: Rach, Rach, I just remembered. I had a dream about Mr. Geller last night.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Phoebe, and Ross are there.]
Phoebe: Oh! Oh my God!
Phoebe: This is the worst Christmas ever.
Phoebe: You saved them! You guys! Oh God, youre the best!
Phoebe: Wow, ooh, you're gonna be making money hand over fist!
Phoebe: Yeah, I know, Frank. I counted them when they were coming out of my area.
Precious: Phoebe? Mike's ex-girlfriend Phoebe, the love of his life? That Phoebe?
(Phoebe exits)
(We hear Phoebe knock at the door upstairs, and the guy answer it.)
Phoebe: Him? Him, Ross?
ROSS: Uh, excuse me. Evolution is not for you to buy, Phoebe. Evolution is scientific fact, like, like, like the air we breathe, like gravity.
(Monicas entrance makes Phoebe try to hide the ring by putting it in her mouth.)
Phoebe: Y'know, there's gonna be lots of other stuff.
Phoebe: Well, youre just gonna have to try.
Gunther: (to Monica and Phoebe) Hey guys.
Phoebe: No idea! I though he was soft like you!
Phoebe: Well, hes very charming.
PHOEBE: [handing him the papers] Here you go. You know what, I just have one more question, um, if you had figured this out sooner and um, I had been around, do you think that I would have been the one who. . . no, um, I'm sorry, don't tell me, I don't th ink either answer would make me feel better.
Phoebe: Oh my God! I dont believe it! Oh, you poor bunny.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Rachel and Phoebe are having dinner with Dr. Green, and everyone is looking at the menu.]
Phoebe: Wow. Okay, I dont know how to talk to you.
Joey: Are you kiddin? Phoebe lived on the street. Okay? Plus, shes got this crazy temper. SheShes not standing right behind me is she?
Phoebe: Why, what happened?
Phoebe: Wow! And Im a vegetarian! All right, all right, well Im sorry, well put some ice on it.
Phoebe Sr: Youre Erwins daughter?!
Phoebe: (quietly) Sells drugs to kids.
Phoebe: Yes, and now hes using this three divorces reason because he wants to stay married to her because he loves her. I must say, "Well done!" Bravo Meg.
Phoebe: A-Allright, well... I'll call the cab company.
Phoebe: Okay, so now they know that you know and they don't know that Rachel knows?
Phoebe: I can't ask him! Do you have any idea how inappropriate that would be?! All I'm saying is just talk to Frank. Okay? Just, y'know, feel him out!
(Monica and Rachel look at Phoebe strangely.)
Phoebe: Yeah! Ooh, you should come with me! Oh yeah, then I'd have someone to sit with!
Phoebe: Oh well y'know. (laughs)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Chandler are entering after the play. Phoebe and Joey are already there.]
Monica: So ah, Phoebe, how was your date?
Phoebe: Thanks you guys! Thank you.
Phoebe: Wait. Really?! Cause mine get me out of tickets.
Phoebe: Ugh, okay, I have an enormous crush on you. But because youre a client, I cant ask you out, even though you give me yknow, the feeling.
Phoebe: Is it Ross? Its Ross isnt itOh my God, its Joey!
Phoebe: Yeah, y'know, people can be so self-involved.
Phoebe: Your welcome, oh please not the one with the turtles.
Phoebe: No, not the used wax.
PHOEBE: I know, I know. [to Rob] Hello.
Phoebe: Oh my God, it's all so elegant! When's the dirty stuff starting?
PHOEBE: I can't believe two cows made the ultimate sacrifice so you guys could watch TV with your feet up.
Phoebe: I know, I know, we can drive, we can vote, we can work, what more do these broads want?
Phoebe: You make up songs?
Phoebe: Oh yeah.
Phoebe: (to Mischa) Okay, y'know what, you dont have to do that now. (Mischa translates that to Sergei) No-no-no-no!! Not him, you dont! (Mischa tells Sergei he can proceed and steps away) Well the moments over.
PHOEBE: I, I, I'm hideous.
Phoebe: Oh, it's your audition from this morning. Can I use the phone again?
Phoebe: Well, thats not something a girl wants to hear.
Phoebe: How about just the bridemaids?
Phoebe: Pretty big? Its huge! God, this guy doesnt have a clue! Hes just walking down the street thinking, I had sex with Rachel Green. I rock! then bam! Hes a father and everythings different.
PHOEBE: I'm not gonna. But you know what's cool though? Ok, if you had a friend named Pete, then I could say, 'Oh yeah, I know Pete, he's friends with my brother.'
Phoebe: (entering) Hey!
Phoebe: What are you wrapping?
PHOEBE: Come on, like you never talk that.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Chandler and Phoebe are sitting at the couch. Ross is sitting at the table and answers the phone.]
Phoebe: Yeah, it's a vase.
Phoebe: No. No food with a face.
PHOEBE: Ohh. . .K. How come?
Phoebe: Wait a second, or maybe you can go in first.