words in movies
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. Mike and Phoebe seem to have finished watching a movie on television.]
Mike: I'm gonna go. (He kisses Phoebe on the cheek)
Phoebe: Why??
Phoebe: Oh...you don't have to go, I have something that will fit you.
Phoebe: I want you to stay.
Phoebe: Why don't you turn them inside ou...
Mike: Done it. (Phoebe becomes a little more subdued) I'll be back in a couple of hours.
Phoebe: I'll miss you.
Phoebe: Great! Ok...I'll go get the tube top.
Phoebe: Wow, Mike Hannigan...You sure know how to make a girl say "Hell yeah!"
Phoebe: Yeah! Let's do it! Let's live together! (They embrace and Mike kisses Phoebe) Oh god, we're really going to move in together!
Phoebe: I've always wanted to live with a guy. "Pick up your socks!" "Put down the toilet seat!" "No! We're not having sex anymore!" It's gonna be fun!
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross, Chandler and Monica are sitting on the couch. Phoebe and Mike enters.]
Phoebe: Hey you guys! Ok, we've got great news.
Mike: Phoebe and I are moving in together.
Phoebe: I know it's so exciting! You know I've never lived with a guy before.
Phoebe: Okay, well you put down the toilet seat.
Phoebe: Uh huh...we're playing you two.
Phoebe: Monica slow down! Ok? I'm just excited to be living with him. You know I mean, I don't know, Can I see someday being married to Mike? Sure! Yeah. Y'know..I can picture myself walking down the aisle in a wedding dress that highlights my breasts in an obvious yet classy way. But do I want that house in Connecticut...you know..near the good schools where Mike and I can send Sophie and Mike Junior.. Oh my god I do.
Ross: Phoebe, I had no idea you were so conventional.
Phoebe: I know! I guess I am! Oh my god! Load up the Volvo I want to be a soccer mom!
Phoebe: Yeah! You bet roomy!
Phoebe: Oh please, these guys, we haven't even moved in yet and they have us picking out china patterns. (Mike seems to gag a little...and laughs nervously. They begin to leave. Phoebe bolts back)
Phoebe: China patterns!!!!!
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. Phoebe and Mike are packing stuff.]
Phoebe: Oh! Alright. Well I think the reason people laugh is becuase it's a play on the word roomy.
Phoebe: Oh no! No no! Not at all. We're just moving in right now. See where it goes.
Phoebe: What do you mean?
Mike: Look. Phoebe, I-I love you. Very much. But I never want to get married again.
Phoebe: Oh. Wow.
Phoebe: Was it really that bad?
Phoebe: Ok, well that's bad. But don't you think it might be different with someone else? Perhaps a blonde who always uses a toilet. Except for once in the ocean.
Phoebe: But it's just...
Mike: Look Phoebe, It's not about you. I just never wanna get married again.
Phoebe: Oh!
Phoebe: No! I definitely don't wanna get married. No I just wanted to make sure you didn't want to too. Whew! Coz you know when we move in and you start changing your mind there's gonna be hell to pay mister!
Phoebe: Yeah I get that.
[Scene:Ross's apartment. Phoebe is at the door.]
Phoebe: Hi
Phoebe: Listen, I wanted to ask you something about marriage.
Phoebe: No...I really wanted to know how you feel about it.
Phoebe: Mike doesn't ever wanna get married.
Phoebe: Never.
Phoebe: I want to, but I just want you to tell me that marriage isn't really that big a deal. You know that I won't, I won't be missing out on anything. That marriage stinks!
Phoebe: That's not how you really feel is it?
Phoebe: Seriously? You divorce-o?
Phoebe: It's ok that's how you feel.
Phoebe: I do love Mike.
Phoebe: Yeah I guess you're right. Yeah thanks. This helped. Thanks.
Phoebe: It's not cooler.
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. Ross is helping with the packing, Phoebe and Mike are also there.]
Phoebe: Better.
Phoebe: Oh yeah you were helpful! Yeah, no, thanks you.
Phoebe: What do you mean?
Phoebe: They are awfully boxy...
Phoebe: Uh huh.
Phoebe: Just one last time erm... the marriage thing... there's no wiggle room? None at all?
Phoebe: Right. Except that I do want to get married.
Phoebe: Someday.
Phoebe: I haven't exactly had a normal life and I never really felt I was missing out on anything but it just feels that now it's my turn some of the regular stuff.
Phoebe: Because I just didn't know how much I wanted it. And I love you, and I wanted to live with you.
Phoebe: But I don't think I can! it was ok to move in when I didn't know what was gonna happen, but I can't move in knowing that nothing is ever gonna happen.
Phoebe: Are you gonna change yours?
Phoebe: Me neither. I think I need to be with someone who wants what I want.
Phoebe: I don't want it to end either.
Phoebe: Yeah.
Ross: (Staring back, and then breaks off) (To Phoebe and Rachel) Yeah, he can do it!
Phoebe and Rachel: So, so sorry.
Phoebe: So bad.
Phoebe: Oh my God Eric hi! Wait, howd you get this number?
Phoebe: All right. Im gonna go to the fertility doctor and um, see if Im ready to have Frank and Alices embryo transferred into my uterus.
Monica: Yeah, I asked you and Phoebe to pick up the pies. You did remember, right?
[Cut to later in that episode. Rachel and Phoebe are going to a movie from Monica and Chandlers, and as Phoebe walks by Chandler she pinches him on the butt and exits.]
Phoebe: I'll pull you through.
Phoebe: Well, alright, that's fine. What about Leslie?
Ross: (laughing) Ohh. (Phoebe takes a couple of steps to the door and Ross quickly hurries out.)
Phoebe: Oh, right! Your adoption interview!
Phoebe: What are you gonna name the baby?
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: No.
Rachel: (to Joey) Hey, who's Phoebe with?
Phoebe: Mandy.
Phoebe: SARAH!
Phoebe: Oh, look look look. The last candle's about to burn out. 10, 9, 8, 7... (time lapse)... negative 46, negative 47, negative 48.... (someone blows it out, the room gets completely dark)
RACHEL: Yeah, yeah.� Phoebe and I are going to have so much fun.� And thank you for watching the baby, by the way.
Monica: Wait a minute, Phoebe! We should be partners. We should be catering partners. I mean, think about it! You're not working right now, and we have such a great time together!
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: (to Rachel) Oh
Phoebe: What? You know about the plate thing?
Phoebe: Thank God you’re here. Listen to this!
Phoebe: Wow!
Phoebe: (to Ross) This place is awesome!
Phoebe: (to Joey) You wouldn’t let her have a grape?
[Scene: A clothes store. Ross and Phoebe are shopping]
Phoebe: Hi. Um, I want to start with a song thats about that moment when you suddenly realize what life is all about. OK, here we go. (plays a chord, then the lights go out) OK, thank you very much.
Phoebe: Yeah!
Phoebe: Okay. Wait, do you know how youre going to stall her?
Phoebe: What? They will be!
Monica: Come on Phoebe, lets go! Come on, its time to get serious, huddle up. Joey, keep your head in the game.
Rachel: (to Phoebe) Why do men keep talking to me like this?
Phoebe: Shhh! Stop it! Stop it Rachel! You cant do this here! (She drags her into the bathroom.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are there as Rachel enters.]
Phoebe: You got it! Ok. But not on the wine that you made, ok, because I just don't want to go back to the Emergency Room.
Phoebe: oh, well, Ross probably has it, you can get it from him later.
Phoebe: Okay, is this the day of good news or what? I got us a job! The wedding reception.
Phoebe: It's locked.
[Scene: Monica’s apartment. Monica and Phoebe are reading magazines when the phone rings and Phoebe reaches to pick it up]
Phoebe: Maybe you need to spice things up a little.
Phoebe: Oh right, like theyre gonna let me have a passport.
Phoebe: Your secret bachelorette party
Phoebe: (Delighted) oh, oh, oh! This is so great! Oh my god! This was not at all scary. Hi everybody. Hi Betty! Betty, Hi! (Thrilled) You found Betty! Oh my god! (Hugging people) This is great. Everybody I love is in the same room, (still happy) Where's Joey?
Phoebe: By the time anyone's figured out what we've done, we'll be in sunny Mexico. (BEAT) Oh, wait, that's the end of a different plan.
Phoebe: No, you have to let me in right now!!
Phoebe: Ooh, that is silly. (gets up) Ill go up there, Ill tell him to keep it down.
Phoebe: If you had to, what would you give up, food or sex?
Phoebe: (running up carrying a tree) Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! No, no, you dont want that one. No, you can have this cool brown one. (points to the almost dead tree she has)
Phoebe: Ok, how about... uhm... sex or dinosaurs?
Phoebe: Oh, how cute!
Phoebe: Oh, thank God, 'cause that thing's really creepy! (looking outside the window) Look, there's Chandler. (he's on the street, talking to a woman)
Phoebe: Yknow, just some good faith money to hold the date.
Phoebe: (glancing at her) What?
Phoebe: Ok, then maybe it'll be, uhm...
Phoebe: (running up) Okay. Okay, heres what were gonna do. Okay, Im gonna break into this mini-van and put it in neutral. You guys push it forward so Ross can drive out of his spot. Okay? All right, here we go. (She opens her coat and reveals that thing car thieves use to break into cars as Ross jumps in behind the wheel. She inserts the device, unlocks the door, opens it, and the alarm goes off.) Haul ass!!!! (Runs off.)
Phoebe: (patting her bag) I got them!
Phoebe: So, should we tell her?
Phoebe: What are you talking about? Sarah's great!
Phoebe : WHO DID YOU SEE HIM WITH?
Phoebe: TELL ME WHAT YOU KNOW!
Phoebe: Why? Who’d you seen him with?
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: They went in together. So sorry.
Phoebe: Well, look, whatever happens, we’re here for you and we love you.
Phoebe: Well, Im going to the dentist, so listen, okay, just be on the look out for anything that, that, that you can fall into, or, or that can fall on you, or... All right, just look out! Okay, And um, I also just wanna, I just wanna tell you all that um...... (starts to cry and runs out)
Phoebe: So you're gonna move?
Phoebe: You just did it again. Chandler, your feelings for Chandler are certainly gone!
Phoebe: Why do you have a realtor?
Phoebe: Yeah I know what I wanted to ask you. Um, can you roll your tongue? Because I can, and my Mom couldnt, and I thought y'know, I figured that was something I got from our Dad.
Phoebe: Yeah, but so is this.
Phoebe: Hey, it’s your Thanksgiving too, y'know, instead of watching football, you could help.
[Scene: The restaurant. Phoebe and Joey are sitting alone at a table for six.]
Phoebe: (walks him to the kitchen) Easy. Step. How did it get on?
(Ross starts to scream and run away. He stops in front of the window of Central Perk to check the pursuit and notices Phoebe and Rachel inside looking at him. He mouths, "What?" Then realizes that the women he attacked are closing in so he screams and runs away.)
Phoebe: Okay, dont freak out. Ill go.
Phoebe: What else?
Phoebe: That’s nice. I like having things to read in the bathroom.
[Scene: The delivery room, everyone is hanging out with Phoebe. Frank, Alice, and the kids aren't there.]
Phoebe: (to Monica) You're gonna be okay?
Ross: Love you guys. (he kisses Monica, he, Rachel and Phoebe leave.)
Phoebe: Hello, is this the creepy residence?
Phoebe: Great!
(they both run off, leaving Ross, Phoebe and Rachel stunned.)
Phoebe: G-sharp? Have you been studying the real names of the chords? (Joey doesn't answer.) Have you? (He looks away in shame.) Oh my God!
Phoebe: OH! He's having an affair.
Phoebe: Well, what kind of guy are you looking for?
Phoebe: Okay, well they are a huge responsibility, especially at this age. They require constant care. They-they need just the right food, and lots and lots of love.
Phoebe: Oh my God! That guy at the counter is totally checking you out!
Phoebe: (to Rachel) Thank you so much for this.
Phoebe: Fine, I'll give you her number.
Phoebe: Oh! Okay! Yeah, thats okay. (To Patrick) Have a seat. (Sits Patrick down next to Rachel.)
PHOEBE: OK. I just met this producer of this like, teeny record company, who said that I have a very fresh, offbeat sound and she wants to do a demo of Smelly Cat.
(And with that, an era ends as Chandler moves in with Monica as Rachel moves in with Phoebe. It tis a sad and happy time for Friends.)
Phoebe: Rachel?
Phoebe: Are you kidding?
Phoebe: Oh, God!
Phoebe: Oh God no, I don't wanna see him take his clothes off!