words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, everyone except Phoebe is there as Rachel enters carrying a magazine.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is there for his interview and everyone but Phoebe are hiding on the couch.]
Phoebe: (entering) Hey!
Phoebe: Oh. Finally! Oh. (Sits back in relief.)
[The next one is from Episode 204: The One With Phoebes Husband, when everyone including Julie is watching Joey in his porno.]
Phoebe: Im gonna get some coffee, anyone want anything?
Phoebe: (interrupting him) I was just being polite!
[This starts another series of flashbacks about Joeys hobbies. The first one is from Episode 703: The One With Phoebes Cookies, Rachel is teaching Joey how to sail his boat, the Mr. Bowmont.]
[The next one is from Episode 603: The One With Rosss Denial, Joey is amazing Phoebe and Monica by holding his breath.]
Phoebe: Hey! Check it out! This is unbelievable! Joey has been holding his breath for almost four minutes!
Phoebe: Umm, I I just think you dont expect someone so hot to be so sweet.
Phoebe: Umm, Phoebe Buffay.
Phoebe: Oh okay, its P as in Phoebe, H as in hoebe, O as in oebe, E as in ebe, B as in bee-bee and E as in (In an Australian accent) Ello there mate!
[The next one is from Episode 512: The One With Chandlers Work Laugh, Joey and Phoebe are betting on who will reach the treat the fastest, the chick or the duck.]
Phoebe: Get your foot off my contestant! Judge!
Phoebe: Ohhh.
Phoebe: (turning from Ross.) No!! Hey-hey that's not a Nutter-Butter, that's just an old Wonton!
Phoebe: Ohh, tough call.
Phoebe and Rachel: Ewwww!!
Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel: (turning to look at Joey) Ewwww!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is sitting on the couch as Joey enters strutting.]
Phoebe: Hey!
Joey: Check it out. (He turns around, pulls down his pants, and shows Phoebe that hes got panties on.) How much of a man am I?!
Phoebe: Wow! Nice! Manly and also kind of a slut.
[Another series of flashbacks begins with Episode 413: The One With Rachels Crush, Joey is telling Rachel and Phoebe how he picks up women.]
Phoebe: Oh, please!
Joey: (to Phoebe) Hey, how you doin?
(Phoebe looks at him, and then giggles and looks away.)
Rachel: And thats Phoebe (points), and thats Joey.
[The final one is from Episode 607: The One Where Phoebe Runs, Joey has been trying to repel Janice and sees its not working to his liking so hes confronting her about the sexual tension.]
Phoebe: Tips not included.
Phoebe: Ross, you've got to tell her how you feel!
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross, Phoebe and Joey are there.]
Phoebe: Can't a girl finish a song around here?
Phoebe: Unbelievable!
Phoebe: Hey, what are you working on?
Phoebe: Okay. HeyOoh, cool sheets! (Notices the sheet over the table.)
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: (disappointed) Oh, good for you.
Phoebe: Hey. So, did you talk to Rachel?
Phoebe: How sweet! Oh, is that the baby?
(Mike takes off his coat to give to Phoebe and the steel band plays "The Wedding Song")
Phoebe: Listen, Mike, if you were Swedish and you were saying the word "lorkins" what flowers would that be?
Phoebe: Uh, Joe?
Phoebe: Yeah, did she sound happy about it? 'Cause my friend Ethel's baby was born with a teeny, tiny beard.
Phoebe: Hey! What do you have there?
Phoebe: Honey, that's gorgeous!
Phoebe, Ross, Rachel: Hey.
Monica: Okay, now this one is rare, this one is medium well! Now go-go-go! (Phoebe enters) Hey Phoebe!
Mike: (To Phoebe) I want one.
Phoebe: One? How about a whole bunch?
[cut to Monica and Phoebe in the kitchen]
(Phoebe nods.)
Phoebe: So, you just let her go?
Phoebe: Wait, wait! Get your coat! Get your coat!
Phoebe: Woo!
Phoebe: Hurry!
(Phoebe and Ross leave.)
Phoebe: Okay!
Phoebe: I - I don't take passengers.
Phoebe: Get out of the cab!
[Cut to Monica's bedroom, both Monica and Phoebe gasp.]
Phoebe: Yes.
Phoebe: m'ap
Phoebe: Yes, she jumped right back up.
Ross: Oh my God, Phoebe, slow down!
Phoebe: Do you wanna get to Rachel in time?
Phoebe: You can open your eyes now.
Phoebe: Hurry!
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: Toll-booth.
Phoebe: Damn, that window is clean.
Phoebe: You should have thought of that before you got in!
Phoebe: Ross, where are you going?
Phoebe: You know, it's a lot less surprising to do that after I've buzzed you into the building.
[Scene: The airport. Ross and Phoebe run in.]
Phoebe: You have to get a ticket to get past security.
[Scene: The ticket-counter. Ross and Phoebe come running.]
Phoebe: We're on our honeymoon.
Phoebe: I'm so lucky I married you.
Phoebe: No, did we miss it?
Phoebe: Hey, it's me. Here's Ross.
Phoebe: Yeah? I know! I know! Uh huh? Listen why dont we just um, sit and relax? You know just be with each other. Quietly!
Ross: Phoebe! Wow! No, no, no!
(Phoebe screams.)
Phoebe: Well, I've never gone this fast before.
Phoebe: You don't have any other choice!
Phoebe: Uh, Rach, hang on.
Phoebe: Uhm, actually no. No, you've... You have to get off the plane.
Phoebe: She's got her cell, you could call her.
Rachel: Phoebe? Is everything okay?
Phoebe: Look David, if... if you had never left, then... yeah, we'd probably still be together right now, but... you did leave, and I-I'm with Mike and I really care about him...
Phoebe: Oh! Here it is! (Noticing it next to the door.) Ooh, Joey! Why did you sign it, "Son of a bitch?" (Son of a bitch is written across the entire picture.)
Phoebe: There she is!
Phoebe: I don't see her.
(Rachel walks up to the gate. Cut to Ross and Phoebe who come running up to the gate.)
Phoebe: (screaming) RACHEL!!
Phoebe: Okay, you're on.
Phoebe: I'm sorry.
Phoebe: Hey.
Phoebe: He went home. He didn't want to see anybody.
Phoebe: Oh, thanks a lot. Do you want to get a cup of coffee?
Phoebe: Sorry Frank, I'm kinda in the middle of the last favor you asked me to do.
Phoebe: So, I guess this is it.
PHOEBE: Eye-contact?
Phoebe: (to the director) Merci. Au revoir. (Translation: Thanks, goodbye.)
Phoebe: Or instead, maybe you could just not marry my brother Frank.
Phoebe: (shocked) What?! (deadpan) Why bother?
MONICA: Why, it's dinner for six. 5 steaks, and an eggplant for Phoebe.
Phoebe: Sure, yeah. I mean, its Joey. I dont want him to get hurt. Well, I must say, I am on fire! First Chandler, now Joey!
[Cut to a hallway in the building, Monica and Phoebe are knocking on a door. Mr. Heckles emerges.]
Phoebe: Come on! The boss that fires a guy thats just been dumped, bitch! And the woman who dumps a guy thats just been fired, blond bitch!
Phoebe: Oh, Im sorry. Is that annoying? And speaking about being selfish in bed, hows Whitney?
PHOEBE: No, uh-uh, I'm just, I'm nervous. So, you know what, maybe if I just, if I picture them all in their underwear.
Phoebe: (after a short pause) I didn't even think about that! (pause) Aaargh, sexual politics!!
Phoebe: Okay. You know how people need transportation, but they also need massages to help them relax so I just figured we could combine the two, okay, I give the massages and Frank drives! I can fix up the van, bolt the table in the back, and you know what Ive got?
Joey: Friends, family, dog... Thank you all for being here to witness this blessed event. The cold has now spread to my special place... so I'm gonna do the short version of this. Phoebe and Mike are perfect for each other. And I know I speak for every one here... when I wish them a lifetime of happiness. Who has the rings?
Phoebe: So great! Okay! Tomorrow were gonna drive out to Montauk.
Monica: (looking at Phoebe eating something) Pheebs, spit that out, that has pork in it.
Phoebe: You must be Hilda.
Phoebe: A new grocery store. The universe said I was going to meet a nice guy and thats what they gave me? (Looks up) When I get up there Im going to kick some ass.
Phoebe: Well, we don't n-n-n-n-need a fireman, we'd, we'd like a good mechanic. (hears the sound of approaching sirens) Oh my God, here they come! Well, we gotta get out of here!
Phoebe: Umm, the street. Come on, lets go to the street. Ooh, listen, dont go onto the balcony until after I get back. (Leaves)
Phoebe: Uh-uh. Ehm, a Knicks game.
Phoebe: Potato, Potaato. (Shes pronounces potato with the both the short and long As.)
PHOEBE: Uh-oh. It's Scary Scientist Man.
RACH: Yeah, we're gonna... we're gonna get some cake. [Phoebe and Rachel go to counter.]
PHOEBE: I can be a waitress. OK watch this. Um, gimme two number ones, 86 the bacon, one Adam and Eve on a raft and rick'em, la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la.
Phoebe: Ohh, theyre having a great time with their Aunt Phoebe! Aunt Rachel hasnt been helpful at all. So, do you miss me?
Phoebe: Taffy, really? Ive never had any.