words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, everyone except Phoebe is there as Rachel enters carrying a magazine.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is there for his interview and everyone but Phoebe are hiding on the couch.]
Phoebe: (entering) Hey!
Phoebe: Oh. Finally! Oh. (Sits back in relief.)
[The next one is from Episode 204: The One With Phoebes Husband, when everyone including Julie is watching Joey in his porno.]
Phoebe: Im gonna get some coffee, anyone want anything?
Phoebe: (interrupting him) I was just being polite!
[This starts another series of flashbacks about Joeys hobbies. The first one is from Episode 703: The One With Phoebes Cookies, Rachel is teaching Joey how to sail his boat, the Mr. Bowmont.]
[The next one is from Episode 603: The One With Rosss Denial, Joey is amazing Phoebe and Monica by holding his breath.]
Phoebe: Hey! Check it out! This is unbelievable! Joey has been holding his breath for almost four minutes!
Phoebe: Umm, I I just think you dont expect someone so hot to be so sweet.
Phoebe: Umm, Phoebe Buffay.
Phoebe: Oh okay, its P as in Phoebe, H as in hoebe, O as in oebe, E as in ebe, B as in bee-bee and E as in (In an Australian accent) Ello there mate!
[The next one is from Episode 512: The One With Chandlers Work Laugh, Joey and Phoebe are betting on who will reach the treat the fastest, the chick or the duck.]
Phoebe: Get your foot off my contestant! Judge!
Phoebe: Ohhh.
Phoebe: (turning from Ross.) No!! Hey-hey that's not a Nutter-Butter, that's just an old Wonton!
Phoebe: Ohh, tough call.
Phoebe and Rachel: Ewwww!!
Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel: (turning to look at Joey) Ewwww!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is sitting on the couch as Joey enters strutting.]
Phoebe: Hey!
Joey: Check it out. (He turns around, pulls down his pants, and shows Phoebe that hes got panties on.) How much of a man am I?!
Phoebe: Wow! Nice! Manly and also kind of a slut.
[Another series of flashbacks begins with Episode 413: The One With Rachels Crush, Joey is telling Rachel and Phoebe how he picks up women.]
Phoebe: Oh, please!
Joey: (to Phoebe) Hey, how you doin?
(Phoebe looks at him, and then giggles and looks away.)
Rachel: And thats Phoebe (points), and thats Joey.
[The final one is from Episode 607: The One Where Phoebe Runs, Joey has been trying to repel Janice and sees its not working to his liking so hes confronting her about the sexual tension.]
Phoebe: I have to go scream into a pillow. (Goes to scream into a pillow)
Phoebe: Yeah we thought it would be nice to use the fancy china for dessert too.
Phoebe: She wasnt a hooker.
Phoebe: No, nothing like that. I was just...such a dummie. I taught this "massage-yourself-at-home-workshop." And they are.
Phoebe: Oh, theres no such thing as an innocent burger.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Chandler, Joey, Monica, and Phoebe are setting up for the party.]
Phoebe: The exclamation point in the title scares me. (Gesturing) Y'know, it's not just Freud, it's Freud!
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. There's a knock on the door, and Phoebe opens it.]
Phoebe: No, no, its just my tooth.
PHOEBE: Oh, you are so much the smitten kitten. You should ask him out.
Phoebe: Well, I have ah, vodka and cranberry juice.
Phoebe: Oh this, well Im glad you asked. (She opens the case and removes a knife and an soda can.) Now, dont you hate it when you have to cut a tin can with an ordinary steak knife? (She efficiently cuts it in half.) Ahh! Now, I know what youre thinking
Phoebe: Um, Chandler, Ross, this is Robert.
Phoebe: Ill have coffee.
Phoebe: As a masseuse and a human, I'm begging you, never do that to anyone!
Tim: I I-I dont know, but I would say its pretty good-o. (Phoebe laughs too hard.)
Phoebe: Hey!
(Enter Phoebe and Robert)
Phoebe: Oh, okay, except I broke up with Roger.
Phoebe: I don't know. I haven't been out on a date in so long.
Phoebe: What do you mean?
Phoebe: Hey.
[Scene: The Geller household kitchen, Monica and Phoebe are cooking for Mrs. Gellers party.]
Phoebe: Okay. (One of Joeys co-workers, walks by with a dead tree.) Yikes! That one doesnt look very fulfilled.
Phoebe: Its mostly just photographs of lesbian love scenes interspersed with video games and free sandwiches.
Ross: Phoebe, you don't have any of the first five numbers.
Phoebe: So is it like art?
Phoebe: Nothing! You have apologized to her like a million times and shes been nothing but terrible to you. And dont forget you just threw her daughter a lovely, albeit slightly boring, shower, and she hasnt even thanked you for it.
Phoebe: Please, right now, no, every time I see him its like Is it on the lose? Is it watching me?
Phoebe: Oh my God! I do love you! How did you do it?!
Phoebe: Hey.
Phoebe: Umm, I think youre really, really great...
Phoebe: No, I can spot you from here.
Phoebe: You don't need Janice for that, you've got us. We
Phoebe Sr: Well, yes, its kindve an unusual house. It has umm, three beautiful bedrooms and ah, no baths. But y'know, the ocean is right there.
Singer: Hey Phoebe.
Phoebe: No. But thanks.
Phoebe: Really? Theres nothing sexual about this? (Sexily) Oooh. Oo God! Ohh. Ohhhh. Ohh. (Some cute guy is watching closely.) (To him) What are you looking at?! (Pause) I mean hi.
Phoebe: Wheres Chandler?
Phoebe: Chandler!!
Phoebe: It was really fun, I mean I've never talked on a car phone before.
Phoebe: No, but lets come back to that later!
Phoebe: What does the sign say?
Phoebe and Monica: Hey.
Phoebe: No, the No Smoking sign. Theres no smoking in my Grandmothers cab.
Phoebe: Um, yeah. Look, I mean, Im not saying shes like evil or anything. She just, you know, shes always breaking my stuff. When I was eight, and I wouldnt let her have my Judy Jetson thermos, so she threw it under the bus. And then, oh, and then there was Randy Brown, who was like... Have you ever had a boyfriend who was like your best friend?
Phoebe: Hmm, bummer.
Phoebe: Oh my God!! You threw Pepper on the fire!
Phoebe: I just wish there was something we could do. (Bends down and talks to him) Hello. Hello, Coma Guy. GET UP, YOU GIRL SCOUT! UP! UP! UP!
Mike: The woman I love... (he walks to Phoebe) I love you... Which is probably something I shouldn't say for the first time in front of my parents... and Tom and Sue...Who are by the way the most sinfully boring I've ever met in my life...
(The gang all looks at Phoebe.)
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: Please!
Phoebe: Dead. (everyone is a bit upset) Oh, it's OK, no, he was old, yeah! And he lived a full life, he was in the first wave at Omaha Beach.
Phoebe: You think you know me so well.
Phoebe: Ross, could we please, please, please listen to anything else?
Phoebe: Thats what I said.
Phoebe: Oh hey, Monica, I heard you saw Donald Trump at your convention.
(Phoebe runs in and joins her.)
Joey: (to Phoebe) Wow, that was kinda brutal.
Phoebe: Oh, I cursed it. So now bad things will happen to he who spends it.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah!
Phoebe: Yeah, well, everybody does! Im a really cool person. And y'know you had 29 years to find that out, but you didnt even try! Y'know what, you walked out on me, and Im just, Im gonna do the same thing to you.
PHOEBE: Hi Rob Dohnen.
[Scene: The rest stop, Phoebes pulling in.]
Phoebe: Never mind, I got it.
Phoebe: I know. This is really, really huge.
Phoebe: (to Paulo) Ok, you're gonna have to not touch my ass.
PHOEBE: Oh. Well is she, is she the first that you've been with?
Phoebe: (to Rachel, whos staying in the cab.) Arent you gonna go?
Ross: (holds up a hand) Little girl misses her cat. (hold up the other hand) Crazy lady thinks her mother is in a cat. (gets up) Okay, y'know what, I have to go have dinner with my son, can I trust that when you see Phoebe, you will tell her.
Phoebe: Okay, dont give me a reason to get mad, okay
Phoebe: Hey, how'd it go?
Phoebe: Ewww! Oh! Its the Mattress King!
Phoebe: (to Leslie) Oh, I thought you werent coming. What? Where were you?
Chandler: Hello Phoebe, I've been thinking about you all day. (He's holding the phone so that Monica can hear it as well.)
(He hugs her. Phoebe enters.)
Phoebe: Well, personally I think it's great you're giving yourself a break.
Phoebe: Oh.
Phoebe: Oh.
Phoebe: What is this?
Phoebe: No it's just that I got this new pager and I have it on vibrate. See ya!
Phoebe: (as Ursula) Okay, yeah, so it's not gonna work.
Phoebe: I cant! I cant! Unless Well are you saying that-that you would move out if-if I didnt buy that lamp?
Phoebe: Oh.
Phoebe: Ohh, well, you're my lucky penny.
Phoebe and Monica: Hey.
Phoebe: But look Chandler, right now, no one has a lower opinion of you than I do. But I totally believe you can do this.
Phoebe: Oh, Rachel and I have appointments to get our hair cut.
Phoebe: Monica your remote doesn't work.
PHOEBE: Oh God, here we go. For the first time in my life I'm gonna say 'Hi birthfather'.
Phoebe: Good. Yknowno-no, okay, its-it feels like everythings been about me lately, so whats happening with you?
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, he clipped on, he said call him as soon as you get a chance, hes at Flimbys.
Phoebe: No, y'know what dont close it (Rachel slams the door shut locking themselves out.) cause the... keys...are in there.
Phoebe: Look out, incoming pumpkin pie!
Monica: Phoebe! Come on Im serious! I just got to talk to him about all this.
Monica: All right, Phoebe get open. Rachel, go long.
Phoebe: (to Monica, whos entering) Hey, youre early.
Phoebe: Alright, Ill try, fine! Yes, Okay!
(Monica and Phoebe get up and start celebrating in the kitchen, pouring wine and singing. Rachel, shocked, goes to join them.)