words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Phoebe are there reading. Rachel is sitting on the couch flanked by Ross and Monica. She suddenly stops reading and starts blinking her left eye as if it's bothering her. The problem is that Joey is on her left and thinks she's winking at him and winks back. Ross is watching this and isn't quite sure of what to make of it.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are eating breakfast.]
Phoebe: Ohh, give him a kiss for me!
Phoebe: Bye!
Phoebe: (after he's gone) I am so sorry you got caught in the middle of that. I didn't mean to be so out there. I am furious with him!
Phoebe: I'm trying, but man that guy can push my buttons!
Phoebe: Look, I don't wanna talk about it. Okay?
Phoebe: You wanna be on my list too? Keep talking! Has anyone seem my list by the way?
Phoebe: Uh, it's a piece of paper and it says, "Ross" on it.
Phoebe: Ohh-oh, chilling!
Phoebe: Oh wait, my grandmother's dead.
Phoebe: No! No, her cab! She probably won't be using it; you can drive it to Las Vegas.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is reading a map as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Oh hey Joey! What's up?
Phoebe: Yeah, I've been around.
Phoebe: Ooh, if you take the northern route there's a man in Illinois with a beard of bees. {Okay, I must protest this, I've lived in Illinois all my life and know of no man with a beard of bees! Wisconsin, on the other hand, might be a different story.}
Phoebe: But on the southern route there's a chicken that plays tic-tac-toe.
Phoebe: Oh, I know a way that you can decide! All right, I'm going to ask you a series of questions and you answer as quickly as you can.
Phoebe: Good, but wait. Okay, all right, here we go. Now I want you to relax. Take a deep breath. Clear your mind. (Quickly) Which do you like better peanut butter or egg whites?
Phoebe: Which would you rather be a fireman or a swimmer?
Phoebe: Who would you rather sleep with Monica or Rachel?
Phoebe: No thinking! No thinking! Tie or ascot?
Phoebe: North route or south route?
Phoebe: Bamn! There you go! Huh?
Phoebe: Oh, this guy again. (She ignores him.)
Joey: Oh, I know how we can decide. Phoebe, show him your game!
Phoebe: Umm, no thank you. (She gets up and moves to the couch. They were at a table previously.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Rachel, Monica, and Joey are there.]
Phoebe: Thanks a lot! I just got that jerk out of my mind!
Phoebe: Bye!
Ross: Hey Pheebs, what 'cha reading? (Phoebe ignores him) Pheebs? (Turns away) Hello? (He sits down next to her and she moves over a bit.) Phoebe? (He moves closer and she keeps moving away.) Phoe-Phoebe! (They end up hanging over the arm rest.) Come on! (He grabs the magazine away from her.)
Phoebe: Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't see you there.
Ross: Phoebe, are you, are you mad at me, or something? 'Cause if are please, tell me what it is I did!
Phoebe: Well, if you don't know I can't help you.
Phoebe: Well, I can't help you.
Phoebe: Apology accepted.
Phoebe: Uh-huh.
Phoebe: (quietly) Bye, fat ass.
Ross: ALL RIGHT!! Phoebe now come on! Will you please tell me what it is I did that mad you so mad at me!
Phoebe: I don't know! I don't remember!
Phoebe: Oh no, I am mad at you. I know that much. But, I am sorry about the fat ass thing. You actually have a very sweet little hiney.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica are there. Ross is trying to figure out why Phoebe's mad at him.]
Phoebe: No.
Phoebe: No that made me feel precious.
Phoebe: That game should not be played without my supervision.
Phoebe: What's in the bag?
Phoebe: I do!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, time lapse, Phoebe and Monica are playing cards as the phone rings.]
Phoebe: Ooh that is definitely Chandler, Joey, or Ross. (Thinks) Or-or Rachel!
Monica: (answers the phone) Hello? (Listens.) (To Phoebe) It's Joey. (Phoebe's proud of herself.) (To Joey) I'm so glad you called! Chandler told me what happened. Y'know he's really upset about it.
Joey: Let's just say there's a well-dressed pack of dogs in Ohio. Hey Monica listen is-is Phoebe there? I gotta ask her something about the car.
Monica: Yeah, she's here. Hold on a second. (She hands the phone to Phoebe.)
Phoebe: Hey, dude!
Phoebe: Oh that's my grandma. (Joey holds the box away from him.) And thanks Joey she's having a really great time. (Joey is happy now.)
Phoebe: Okay Joey? Chandler's here, he was wondering (We hear the dial tone as Joey hangs up.) Okay, I guess he ran out of change.
Phoebe: No, don't-don't say I'm sorry with porn!
Phoebe: Y'know what you should send him? A cartoon of cigarettes. 'Cause that why he could trade it for protection. No. That's prison.
Phoebe: Uh-hmm.
Phoebe: Fauna.
Phoebe: Garfunkle.
Phoebe: You said I was boring--Ohh!
Phoebe: Oh my God, I remember now! We were playing chess!
Ross: Phoebe! You and I have never played chess!
Phoebe: Oh, come on! Yes, remember that time on the frozen lake? We were playing chess, you said I was boring, and then you took off your energy mask and you were Cameron Diaz! (Realizes) Okay, there's a chance this may have been a dream.
(Phoebe jumps to the floor as Ross tackles Rachel off of the couch. Chandler helps push Rachel onto the floor by jumping over the back of the couch. Phoebe grabs Rachel's head to hold it still and opens Rachel's eye as Monica jumps onto Chandler's back to administer the torture--I mean medicine.)
Phoebe: That's not very enlightened!
Phoebe: Well, I think you should wait.
Phoebe: Uhuh, uhuh... (seems distracted)
Phoebe: (grins and walks to the kitchen and says to Chandler and Joey.) I helped!
Phoebe: Yknow, this is probably none of my business, but werent you guys supposed to not be seen in public together?
Phoebe: Mike Hannigan... will you marry me? (Mike looks bewildered)
Phoebe: Hey, hey! (shouting) Boo us? Boo you!
Phoebe: Right! Never! Never! I swear! (They kiss... The door opens and David comes in again.)
(Chandler hands Phoebe an envelope, and some more to Monica)
Phoebe: Oh, god. So adorable. Look at them sleeping there like angels.
[Scene: Mike and Phoebe at a restaurant.]
Phoebe: Oh my God!
Phoebe: No problem! Next week: stealing... (Chandler walks away to store the box of broken china.)
Mike: Phoebe, I...
(Phoebe has this weird, anxious, nervous look on her face)
Phoebe: It's in the cake, isn't it?
Phoebe: Yes!
Phoebe: Uh-huh! (and now Mike kneels properly)
Phoebe: I love you more!
(They kiss again, and Phoebe looks at the ring.)
Phoebe: (she enters) Hey...
Phoebe: It's so obvious, why doesn't he just ask?
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone except Phoebe is there]
Phoebe: Thank you! (to Rachel) Oh, and I have something for you!
Phoebe: No. I'm sorry. It's just 'cause I couldn't be there. 'Cause all I ever get to do now is pregnant stuff, it just bums me out.
Phoebe: Well, it was really sweet, and like the most romantic thing ever.
[Scene: Another Waiting Room, Phoebe and Joey are trying to find out where the guy with the broken leg is.]
Phoebe: Oh, my first love!
Phoebe: (proud of herself) Oh yes, they are.
Phoebe: I cant say because hes famous.
[The next flashback is from The One With The Dozen Lasagnas, Phoebe is telling everyone but Rachel about the pass Paulo made on her.]
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: And how none of it matters when the people really love each other. (Chandler and Monica kiss.) And how people will believe anything you tell them as long as its a compliment.
Phoebe: (looking at Monica entering) Hey!
Phoebe: All right, let's see, call me mrs Hannigan.
Phoebe: Why, you don't like her?
Phoebe: Really? You think?
Phoebe: (excited) Wow! It's huge! It's so much bigger than the cubicle. Oh, this is a cube.
[Scene: Shop, Phoebe and Rachel are talking in front of the dressing room]
PHOEBE: I'm sorry, Monica, I'm really happy you got promoted, but cold cucumber mush for thirty-something bucks? No! Rachel just had that, that, that salad, and, and Joey with his like teeny pizza! It's just...
Phoebe: You mean you stole it! (Monica sneezes again) Don't cover your mouth when you do that!
[Scene: Monica's apartment. Phoebe enters the room.]
Phoebe: Hi! Sorry, I'm late.
Amanda: (To Phoebe) Smell my neck! (Phoebe does so) It's not perfume! It's me! It's my natural scent!
Phoebe: Oh, I didn't know you wanted her too!
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is dancing around his living room as Phoebe enters, catching and startling him.]
Chandler: (excited) Guys, guys, I've got great news! Guess what Joey: Uh, ah, Monica's pregnant?! Monica: (shocked) Really? (She looks around, suddenly embarrassed) Let's get past the moment. Phoebe: What's your news? Chandler: Thank you. I got a job in advertising. (Everybody cheers) Monica: (hugging Chandler) Oh, honey, that's incredible! Phoebe: (inquisitive) Gosh, what's the pay like? (Everybody stares at her indignantly) Oh, come on people (defending) come on, now, if I don't know who makes the most, how do I know who I like the most! (She looks at Joey) Hey Joey! (Joey winks at her) Chandler: Actually, it pays nothing. It's an internship. Joey: Oh, that's cool. We have interns at 'Days Of Our Lives'. Chandler: Right. So, it'll be the same except less sex with you. (Joey nods) Ross: So, uh, what kinda stuff do you think they'll have you do there? Chandler: Well, it's a training program, but at the end, they hire the people they like. Phoebe: (enthusiastic) That's great. Chandler: Yeah, I mean, there's probably gonna be some ground work which will probably stink, you know, grown man getting people coffee is a little humiliating (At the same time, Gunther puts down a cup of coffee in front of Chandler) Chandler: (grinning awkwardly) Humiliating and noble! (Gunther shoots a nasty look at him while leaving) Ross: You know, if I didn't already have a job, I think, I would have been really good in advertising. Monica: Ross, you did not come up with "got milk?" Ross: Yes, I did, I did! (He turns to Joey, disappointed) I should have written it down!
Phoebe: Umm, Wethering Heights. I'm taking a literature class at the New School and I have to finish it for the first session tomorrow.
Monica: Okay. (When Phoebe turns around Monica runs out into the hall after Mrs. Green.) Mrs. Green! Okay Im really sorry!! Im apologizing for the(She trips and falls down the stairs.) (Pause) Okay, I bit my tongue, but Im still really sorry!
Phoebe: Sorry. ..Y'know, those stupid soda people gave me seven thousand dollars for the thumb.
Phoebe: Hey! (there's a pause)
Phoebe: When I was you! Y'know what, its all Joeys fault, cause he left his nose open!
Phoebe: Ok, don’t hold thy breath!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the next morning, Rachel and Phoebe are eating breakfast.]
Phoebe: I knew it!
Phoebe: Okay. Rachel, the hottest babies in the Tri-State Area are in this room right now! I overheard one of the judges say that not one of them holds a candle to Emma!
Phoebe: You're also so generous and kind and scrappy!
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: So what did you two do about it?
Phoebe: You guys, we�ve been waiting for you for a long time, maybe you should order.
[Scene: The hallway, Ross is coming up the stairs as Phoebe leaves Joey and Chandlers.]
Phoebe: Mr. X and Phoebe Buffay.
Phoebe: Sure, I so glad we did this. It feels so good!
Phoebe: City Hall.
Phoebe: Well, I’ll just ask for it back!
Phoebe: Yeah. See, that money was for a big wedding, that we thought we didn’t want, but it turns out we do.
Phoebe: Hey, that’s not fair! A person’s wedding is important! And especially to me! Ok? I didn’t have a graduation party! And I didn’t go to Prom. And I spent my sweet sixteen being chased round a tire yard by an escaped mental patient who is his own words wanted to “kill me” or whatever. So I deserve a real celebration and I am not gonna let some sweaty little man make me feel badly about it.( She storms out)
Phoebe (to Mike): Gay, go.
Phoebe: Hey, you know what, I've never had a one-year anniversary before, so no matter where we go, I'm wearing something fancy pants, and... I'm gonna put on my finest jewelry and we're gonna have sex in a public rest room.
Phoebe: Yes!! Yes!! Im the next caller! You were gonna have me hang up.
(We hear the guy telling a joke, and Phoebe laughing.)
Phoebe: Hey, buddy. Hows my favorite dog, huh? Hows my favorite dog? (the dog doesnt move) Youre subdued. (to Joey) Did you give him a beer?
Phoebe: No, yeah! The groom cannot see the bride!
Rachel: (after a pause) Phoebe, Shania Twain is still alive!
Phoebe: (to the Charity guy) We're back!
Phoebe: But... but... but we're giving you this!
Phoebe: Oh, is that you?
Phoebe: (looks at the amount on the check, and gasps) Well, this is very generous!
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Oh you�ll probably take care of that on your hands.
Phoebe: Hey!
Monica: Well, we thought we would all go to a picnic (Phoebe gasps), in Central Park!
Phoebe: Hey Rach.
Phoebe: You're not making the pies yourself?
Phoebe: Ear plugs, or cloves of garlic?
Phoebe: (sarcastic) Oh... okay.
Phoebe: What's Emma doing today?
Phoebe: Yeah!
Phoebe: Well, I was thinking...
Phoebe: Oh okay. Umm, all right. (Picks up the phone and starts reading from the script.) Hi, this is Phoebe from Empire Office Supplies, can I speak to your supply manager please?
Phoebe: Hey.
PHOEBE: (calling from the bar on her cell phone.) Hey, Mike, it's me.� Listen, is um, is Ross near you?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica and Phoebe are trying to determine the cookie recipe by eating small pieces.]
Phoebe: Yeah!
Phoebe: Yeah!
Phoebe: Well, she's gonna look all washed out next to the other contestants!
Rachel: Phoebe, you have to calm down.
Phoebe: Why not!
Phoebe: I can do that for the kids.