words in movies
[Scene: Street, Phoebe is being followed by some guy, as they pass a flower vendor. Phoebe turns around and the guy quickly picks up some flowers and continues following her.]
Phoebe: (turns around) Um, that's it. No. Hey! You! J. Crew guy. Yeah. Why have you been following me? I mean, all week long everywhere I look there's you.
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: Oooh. Oh, well this is awkward.
Phoebe: Um, yeah, you want Ursula, and I'm Phoebe. Twin sisters! Seriously.
Phoebe: Oh, you're not a dingus.
Phoebe: Well, I mean look it's, it's not your fault, you know. I mean this is just what, what she does to guys, okay.
Phoebe: Wait, (grabs him) you know what, I got a little story. When I was in Junior High School I went through this period where I thought I was a witch. And there was this guidance counselor who said something to me, that I think will help you a lot. He said okay, 'you're not a witch you're just an average student.' See what I'm saying?
Phoebe: Um, well, get over it. So, I mean you, you just seem to be a really nice guy, you know. Don't be so hard on yourself okay.
Phoebe: Oh, thanks a lot. Do you want to get a cup of coffee?
Phoebe: Okay. (they start to leave, he is still following her) Okay, you don't have to walk behind me any more.
Phoebe: (entering) Hi!
All: Hey, Phoebe.
Phoebe: Hey, oh, you know that guy who's been following me? I talked to him today.
Phoebe: Okay, first I'm not crazy. And second, say it don't spray it. Anyway his name is Malcom, and he wasn't following me, I mean he was, but 'cause he thought I was Ursula, ick. And, that's why, that's why he couldn't just come up and talk to me. 'Cause of the restraining order.
Phoebe: Ooh! No, no, no, no, he's not like a kook, no. He's just like this, this very passionate, incredibly romantic guy, that got like a tinsy bit carried away, you know. And we just get along really well, and he's so cute.
Phoebe: No, I'm just gonna help him, you know, get 'de-Ursula-ized', like you know, like I did for Joey after he went out with her.
Joey: (with his mouthful) Hey, I didn't stalk her. I mean (he sprays Phoebe with crumbs)
Phoebe: Okay, I asked for the news, not the weather.
[Scene: Central Perk, Malcom is giving Phoebe all of his spy stuff]
Phoebe: Oh, great. Great. You're doing great, you know real strong. Going strong. Keep going.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah. What's this? (picks up a book)
Phoebe: Um, not even a little bit.
Phoebe: Oh, okay then.
Malcom: (reading) I met Phoebe today. She was really nice to me eventhough I'm such a loser. And, then when I was walking home I thought about her a lot, it was weird, but kinda cool.
Phoebe: Good. So what were you thinking?
Phoebe: Really?
Phoebe: Oh.
Phoebe: Oh, okay. (he kisses her)
Phoebe: (entering) Hellooo!
Phoebe: Oh, well he's yummy. We did a little kissin'.
Rachel: Phoebe, what are you doing?
Phoebe: Oh, no, no, no, no. You know what, he's not into that stuff anymore. He quit for me.
Phoebe: Look, he gave me his night vision goggles and everything.
Phoebe: What, he's not still following her. Do you think he is still following her?
Phoebe: What are you saying I should do?
Phoebe: Thank you, Monica.
[Scene: Subway station, Phoebe is following Malcom by finding behind the pillars until she comes up to one with a wire mesh garbage can next to it. Malcom stops and starts walking the other way and passes Phoebe, who quick tries to hide behind the garbage can. But, Malcom sees her.]
Malcom: Phoebe?
Phoebe: Yes? Yes! Oh.
Phoebe: Oh, I was just here looking for, um, my um, my part of an old sandwich. Oh, here it is! Oh. (picks one up out of the garbage can.)
Phoebe: Um, perhaps. Yes! Yes, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I was just afraid that you were still hung up on my sister.
Phoebe: Oh well, what do you know, there goes my identical twin sister. Just walkin' along looking like me. What, is this just like a freakish coincidence, or did you know she takes this train?
Phoebe: No, no, it's not your fault. You know it's partly my fault, 'cause I made you quit cold turkey. Sorry, no. Okay, well, I mean, I can't date you anymore, 'cause your, you know (in a high pitched voice) Wow! But um, but I will definitely, definitely help you get over my sister. Okay, stalk me for a while. Huh? Yeah, and, and, and, I'll be like an Ursula patch.
Phoebe: Yeah, just, okay, look I'm going. Um, come on. Op, op, behind the pillar, which way am I gonna go?
Phoebe: Oh please, you are not gonna ditch again like you did with London.
Phoebe: It's a Thanksgiving miracle!
Phoebe: Watching ballroom dancing?
[Scene: Monica and Phoebes, Ross is on the phone, as Phoebe is walking by carrying a lamp.]
[Scene: Hospital. Phoebe is there stroking Coma Guy's hair, when Monica enters with a bunch of balloons.]
Phoebe: well there is no Vicrum, Ross made him up because I never really have been in a long-term relationship, I've never lived with a guy, and I've never even celebrated an anniversary so. (Pause) if that's too weird for you and you wanna leave I totally understand. In fact I'll close my eye's make it less awkward (She sits with her eyes closed and Mike kisses her, Phoebe opens her eyes and like a little child says.) You kissed me.
Phoebe: His first big kids bike, this is so exciting!
Phoebe: Let's see! (Opens her address book.) Oh, you know who's great? Sandy Poophack.
Jack: (approaches her) Phoebe, listen
Phoebe: So, how are things going with crazy? Has she cooked your rabbit yet?
Phoebe: I cant believe that! Now the only thing left of my grandmothers legacy is this crumb. (She picks it up with her finger and holds it out to Monica.) I wish you a long and happy marriage.
Rachel: Oh my God Phoebe, this is impossible! We cant do this by Friday! We have to find a place. We have to invite people! We have to get food! Theres just too much to do! Its impossible! We cant do it! We cannot do it! We cannot do it!
Phoebe: (interrupting him) I was just being polite!
Phoebe: Sure!
Phoebe: What?!
Phoebe: I love it!!
Phoebe: And if that guy at the charity gives us a hard time, my friend hasn't shot anyone in a really long time.
Phoebe: (gasps) Oh my God Ross!!
Phoebe: No-no, itll be fun! We can come back and we can haunt these guys!
Phoebe: Oh hi!
Ross: Phoebe really likes the bike huh?
Phoebe: So far, it kinda blows. I dont know, I just thought y'know that hed feel more like a brother y'know, like you and Ross, just like close and connected and....
Phoebe: Of course!
[Cut to outside, theyre going to talk to Phoebe about walking the bike.]
Phoebe: (gasps) Does that mean Carcass is available?
Phoebe: Ohh, uh-huh so much!
Phoebe: No that's not true. If you're not moving forward, you're just staying still. And staying still is good. Watch this. (She stays still for a brief second.)
Chandler: Phoebe, are you having a heart attack?!
Phoebe: Why? Why do I have to learn?
Phoebe: What kind of an emergency?
Phoebe: All right.
Phoebe: Well
Phoebe: Okay. (Does so.)
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: Swear?!
Phoebe: You wont let go?
Phoebe: (thinks it over) Okay.
Ross: (Watching Marcel play with Phoebe. To Chandler) Look at him. I'm not saying he has to spend the whole evening with me, but at least check in.
(Joey throws a punch and just lightly taps her on the shoulder, Phoebe counters with a jab to the nose.)
Tag: Id love to ask out your friend Phoebe.
Phoebe: Oh! Oh! Oh no!! You swore!
Phoebe: Well just figure out a way to talk him out of it.
Phoebe: What?! (Ross rings the bell.) What the hell?!
Ross: Phoebe.
Phoebe: What?! Why?!
Phoebe: (seeing him) Oh, hello liar.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Wow! How long were we arguing for?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are admiring Monicas wedding dress.]
Phoebe: Im sorry. Im sorry. I never got to be in a club. I-I didnt go to high school, but three of us would meet behind a dumpster to learn French. Bonjour.
Monica: All right, all right! Lets just cut to the chase, okay? (To Phoebe) Youre single. (To Tim) Youre single. (To Phoebe) He gets off work at eleven. (To Tim) Shell be waiting for your call. (To Phoebe) Ill give him your number if I can get one calamari and one Caesar salad!! (Everyone in the kitchen stops.) I did not yell. I am not putting a dollar in the jar.
Phoebe: Huh?
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, it's my mom's.
[Scene: Chandler and Eddie's apartment. Chandler is at the foosball table trying to get Phoebe to play a game with him.]
Rachel: You may need to use this year to teach Ben about Phoebe.
Phoebe: (entering) Oh, hey, you guys!
Phoebe: Noo! But that would've been so cool!
Phoebe: Yes, you will be very sad. All right, well I gotta go tell Rachel the good news.
Phoebe: Yeah, why not?
Phoebe: You're sure? You're absolutely sure?
Phoebe: Okay. Umm, ooh, oohoh, I have a game!
PHOEBE: Please, I almost fell for that with, uh, Pride of the Yankees, I thought I was gonna see a film about Yankee pride and then, boom, the guy gets Lou Gehrig's disease.
Phoebe: (at window) Eww, look. Ugly Naked Guy lit a bunch of candles.
PHOEBE: You know you should go outside and be with the three-dimensional people.
Ross: Phoebe, you cant massage people in my apartment!
Phoebe: No spark? Didnt you sleep together?
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Hey! (she sits down next to him)
Phoebe: Yeah. I actually am, yeah. Y'know life-lifes gonna had you all kinds of stuff, y'know you learn your little lessons and hopefully you grow. Wanna hear a new song?
Phoebe: Maybe on some level.
Phoebe: Well, didnt you just hear what I said?!
Phoebe: Well, we cannot tell Joey about this. He's already flipping out about everything that's changing. This will push him over the edge.
Phoebe: Our apartment is ready.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe are now sitting in the living room.]
Rachel: Phoebe?
Phoebe: Hm?
Phoebe: (nods along) Fish!
Phoebe: Because you would rather live here with Joey.
Phoebe: Yay, okay!
Phoebe: We did have fun, didn't we?
Phoebe: Are you two talking about the same baby? Hey! Have you started off thinking of names yet?
Phoebe: I love the license plate game!
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: Yeah?
Phoebe: Yeah?
Phoebe: (entering with Erin) Oh. Hey!
Phoebe: A little bit, yeah.
Phoebe: Are you sure?
Phoebe: Oh me too.
Phoebe: Hi Paul!
Phoebe: No, I do not hear that.
Phoebe: You heard her too?! You have the gift!
Phoebe: Stop it! Stop it no! Thats not fair! Yknow I cant resist that beautiful voice!
Rachel: (entering with Phoebe) Hey!
Phoebe: Oh.
Phoebe: Oh.
Phoebe: So you wouldnt mind if he was dating someone else?
Phoebe: I know. Have you considered pageanting?
(Phoebe gets up and goes to play, Ross goes over and sits down next to Monica and Rachel.)
Ross: Thanks. (Phoebe gets up to get a refill.) (To Monica) Oh! So for tomorrow, do you want to rent a car and drive down together or what?
Phoebe: Absolutely!