words in movies
ROSS: [puts the message in the cupboard] I don't know, I don't get, I don't get it, I mean, wh, wh, two months ago Rachel and I were like, this close. Right now, what, I'm takin messages from guys she, she meets at the movies? I mean this, this Casey should be takin' down my messages, ya know, or, or, Rachel and I should be together and, and we should get some kind of me, message service.
[Rachel enters with a laundry basket]
MRS. GELLER: Oh, hi Rachel.
RACHEL: Hi.
RACHEL: Oh, well, you know, they're just separated so, you know, never know, we'll see.
RACHEL: What, what incident?
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is talking to a man at the counter. Ross and Phoebe are sitting at the couches.]
ROSS: [Rachel, laughing, puts a hand on the guy's shoulder] Look at that, look at that, see how she's pushing him away and he won't budge. Alright, I'm gonna do something. [walks up in the middle of their conversation] Excuse me, are you Rachel?
RACHEL: What?
RACHEL: What are you, what are you doin'?
RACHEL: What?
RACHEL: Saving, saving, saving me from the pleasant conversation with the interesting man, saving me?
RACHEL: OK, Ross, listen to me, I am not yours to save.
RACHEL: What?
RACHEL: OK, you know what, are, are you being like, the blind date guy again?
RACHEL: Ross, there is no us, OK.
RACHEL: No, listen to me. I fell for you and I get clobbered. You then fall for me and I again, somehow, get clobbered. I'm tired of being clobbered, ya know, it's, it's just not worth it.
RACHEL: NO but Ross. We are never gonna happen, OK. Accept that.
RACHEL: No, no, ACC-cept that.
RACHEL: [comes up from behind the bar and startles Chandler] Hey. I've got something that's gonna make you happy. Guess what Gunther found? [holds up Chandler's bracelet]
ROSS: [Rachel enters] Oh.
RACHEL: Hi.
MRS. GELLER: Over here Jack. OK. I see, Rachel's coming up the path. Oh doesn't she look pretty. Jack, get this. [Rachel enters with a huge nose]
RACHEL: Oh my God.
RACHEL: They had to reduce it because of, of my deviated septum.
RACHEL: Oh.
RACHEL: Ahh, so do you, beautiful. [they hug]
RACHEL: What?
RACHEL: Oh, that's OK, it's just the shoulder, it's not my dress.
RACHEL: Oh, thanks. So, uh, what are you gonna do this summer?
RACHEL: [the shoulders of her dress keep falling off her shoulders] Is my hook unhooked? These things keep falling down, I can't. . .
RACHEL: Oh, the guys are here.
RACHEL: Oh my God, look there's Roy Gublik.
RACHEL: Where's Chip, why isn't he here yet?
ROY: He'll be here OK, take a chill pill. [Chip pins Monica's corsage on, Monica then turns and whispers to Rachel]
MONICA: I just told Rachel that Roy touched my boob.
RACHEL: I can't go to my own prom without a date, I can't, it's too late.
MRS. GELLER: [to Ross on the stairs] I have a wonderful idea. You should take Rachel to the prom.
RACHEL: I can't believe I don't get to go to my own prom, this is so harsh.
MR. GELLER: [going downstairs] Rachel, ready or not, here comes your knight in shining. . . oh no. [Chip has shown up and the four are leaving]
RACHEL, MONICA, ROY, and CHIP: Bye.
[Rachel, seeing what he did for her, gets up, walks across the room, and kisses Ross]
Rachel: (coming out of her bedroom with a necklace) Here it is! I love it. I wear it all the time.
Rachel: (She enters and hands Phoebe the earring) Here you go. Thank you!
Rachel: Hey you guys... You're never gonna believe it. This headhunter called me. I have a meeting tomorrow with Gucci. Gucci wants me.
Rachel: Oh-oh, thats a risky little game!
[Scene: Rachels hotel room, shes waking up with a horrendous hangover.]
Rachel: Who wrote it?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler, Rachel, and Joey are there as Ross enters.]
Rachel: Don't worry, we're just gonna search here for an hour, and then we're gonna go over to Joey's and search, OK?
[Cut to Carol and Susans apartment, from next weeks episode Rachel is talking to Ben.]
Rachel: (entering from the bathroom) Hey Mon? Im gonna check my messages.
(Phoebe and Rachel return)
(He goes and sits down next to Rachel and puts a cigarette in his mouth, which Rachel takes away from him. He puts another cigarette in his mouth, and Rachel takes it away again.)
Rachel: The beef? Yeah, that was weird to me, too. But then, yknow, I thought well, theres mincemeat pie, I mean thats an English dessert, these people just put very strange things in their food, yknow. [To Joey] Oh! by the way, can I borrow some Rum from your place?
Ross: No-no-no! Only if I promise never to see Rachel again.
Rachel: You know Pheebs, when I was little, on my birthday, my daddy would hide a present in every room of the house, and then he would draw a treasure map to help me find 'em all.
Chandler: Yes, it does bother me! And I think it would bother a lot of people. Rachel, when you were going out with Ross, did it bother you when he flirted with other women?
RACHEL: [sings] And you're no friend to those with noses.
Rachel: Yeah, no, I don't-I don't put things in my eye.
Rachel: Well, then can we meet him?
Rachel: I have.
Rachel: Okay! (She jumps on the bed.)
Rachel: What?
Rachel: I did, Monica was so sweet she left a little mint on my pillow.
Rachel: I did.
(Phoebe looks at Rachel.)
Rachel: Oh.
Rachel: Oh thanks, but listen, I was just at Monicas and she and Chandler had a big fight and theyre not moving in.
Rachel: Thats a line from the show too!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are in the kitchen.]
Rachel: No-no-no, that not Joshua.
Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel: (turning to look at Joey) Ewwww!!
(All of a sudden, Marcel grabs Ross's finger with his whole fist, and he squeezes it, so tight, that Ross finally knows what it is to be a father. He looks up at his friends, who smile encouragingly, Rachel tenderly resting her chin upon Monica's shoulder. Ross realises that Chandler was right and he's gonna make a great dad!)
Rachel: Oh, Joey! Sorry!
Rachel: Really?
Monica: Yeah, well, Im using noise. Okay. All right! So, is everybody ready? Here we go. (She flips on the switch and a hum starts.) I hear something! I hear something! Where is it? (They all start looking until Rachel realises its Joey.)
Rachel: Gone! I mean its amazing Pheebs. I feel so free and so graceful. (Turns and bumps into a mounted policeman and falls) Hey! Look out for the horse! Sorry! (Runs off.)
Rachel: Oh, that must be it.
Rachel: I love it at Joeys!
Rachel: Thanks!
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Listen umm, yeah okay, I need to talk to you!
Rachel: (changing the subject) Yknow Bob in Human Resources
Rachel: I know. Im sorry.
Rachel: All right Joey! That is enough! (Grabs him and pulls him away from Bobby and Dina) Listen, as beautiful and moving as this ceremony is, its not legal. Okay? They-they dont have a marriage license, they dont have any witnesses, and the groom only has on one shoe!
Ross: (recognizing her) Oh my God! Rachel Green?
Rachel: So just bring it back downstairs, whats the problem?
RACHEL: (as herself) "Well, should we just continue to live together and not really tell each other how we're really feeling?"
(Rachel enters from her new room.)
Joey: Oh, hold up, I'll walk out with you. Now, Rach, when she taught you to kiss, you were at camp, and.. were you wearing any kinda little uniform, or- (Rachel exits and slams the door in his face.) That's fine, yeah...
[Cut to Phoebe and Rachel sitting on the couch.]
Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Thank God youre pretty. (Exits.)
Rachel: Youre jokin right?
Janine: (to Monica and Rachel) Bye.
Rachel: Ohhhhhhhh God. (climbs off his back)
Rachel: Oh, oh, oh, Ill get Rainy Day Bear!! (runs to get him)
(They leave on the tour and Rachel goes to follow them but Phoebe stops her and drags her into the kitchen.)
Rachel: I know isnt it? Its like Im right there with Joshua.
Rachel: Ugh. (She goes over and lays her head on Phoebes lap.)
Rachel: Yep!
Chandler: (To Rachel) He has a gun!
Rachel: So ah, did you have fun at the bachelor party last night?
Rachel: Oh. (Realizes.) Ohhhhhhhhh .
Rachel: No, she was already in, but then this big bitch behind me tried to steal my umbrella, so I clocked her. Ohhh! I cant believe this, all I wanted was a few hours outside of work to see Joshua, so he can go ahead and start falling in love with me.
Rachel: No. (grabs an eggroll) And then I called him, and he wasnt there.
Rachel: (shocked) What?
Phoebe: Rachel, what the hell is this?!
Rachel: You found me a guy?
Rachel: Oh, thank you.
Rachel: Ohh! I would kill for a salmon skin roll right now!
Rachel: What are you guys doing?
Rachel: All right.
(Now they kiss passionately... and then Ross enters with Emma. They freeze, pull away and look at Ross who looks like he just can't believe what he's seeing. Joey straightens his shirt, and Rachel says I'm so-oo sorry, and presses her breasts together, just like Joey did before.)
Rachel: Yes, Ill meet em.
Rachel: Wow! I mean I had no idea that that was gonna
Ross: I know. (Rachel bends down to Emma and Ross looks over his shoulder again, afraid)
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Oh
Rachel: What?
Rachel: Ummm. Oh! Im sorry. (She grabs the box and offers him a piece.) Its a little old but
Monica: Eldad, this is Rachel.
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Oh, hi.
Rachel: Yeah?
Chandler: There you go! There you are! (Rachel stares at Monica and Chandler)
Rachel: Yeah, Im good.
Phoebe: Oh! Okay! Yeah, thats okay. (To Patrick) Have a seat. (Sits Patrick down next to Rachel.)
Rachel: Oh I see, so this suit is making a point.
Rachel: Ill tell ya who should be embarrassed! Its you guys! Come on! This is ridiculous! Thank you very much, but I do not need you to get me a date!
(He starts to get up, but Rachel stops him.)
Rachel: Thank you! (Storms out.)
Rachel: Oh, yeah, sure, sure, sure, sure. (points at Chandler, who holds up the cue ball as a Remember me? thing) Listen, can we please have lunch the next time Im in the city?
Rachel: Pheebs, I would make a reservation for five, because one of us has to stay home and watch Emma. (to Ross:) Which one of us should go to dinner?
Ross: Im not going to do that. (Rachel glares at him.)
Rachel: Huh. All right.
Rachel: Hmm. Look, Ross, if you want your neighbors to like you, why don't you just pay the hundred bucks? The party's gonna cost you way more than that.
Rachel: I'm sorry, what?
(Ross gets up and gestures to Rachel, we cut to Joey and Rachel)
Rachel: No seriously! Seriously! What has happened to the sanctity of marriage?