words in movies
Rachel: Well obviously I wont be able to come, for those of you who havent checked their calendars today is my due date. Well yknow, I just want to take a moment and thank you guys for how great youve been during this time. I really couldnt have done it without you. And I have loved these last nine months! And even though I am so looking forward to the next part, I am really gonna miss being pregnant.
[Scene: Central Perk, time lapse, and Rachel is entering still pregnant.]
Rachel: Thats right, still no baby! (To Monica, Joey, and Chandler on the couch) Come on people! Please make some room!
Rachel: You. Like you havent done enough.
(Rachel turns and looks at the group on the couch and they move over. Chandler measures the room theyve made with his arm and decides its not enough and they all move over again.)
Rachel: God. (Sits down.) I have never been so uncomfortable in my entire life!
Rachel: (interrupting her) Oh Phoebe, thats a great story. Can you tell it to me when youre getting me some iced tea? (Phoebe gets up and Rachel groans.) (To the baby) Oh God, get out! Get out!! Get out!! Get out!!
Chandler: Lets. (Everyone gets up and leaves Rachel.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe, Chandler, Joey, and Monica are there as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Do you want me to come over there and sit on you? Cause Ill do it.
Rachel: They sent me home from work. They were like, "Start your maternity leave now! Just rest, get ready for the baby." Well yknow what? Screw em! If they dont want me there, Ill just hang out with you guys.
Rachel: (overhearing that) What-what about me?
Rachel: I dont. But I would still like to be acknowledged. What? Just because Im pregnant you think Im invisible.
Chandler: (in a manly voice) Yeah well, Im gonna go spit. (He goes into the bedroom. On his way out, Joey gives Rachel a wide berth.)
Rachel: Oh, I have to pee. If I dont come out in five minutes its because Ive choked to death on the potpourri stink. (Goes into the bathroom.)
Rachel: (calling from the bathroom) All right, whos turn is it to help me get up!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel is entering, still pregnant.]
Rachel: Oh, I have to go pee. Apparently this baby thinks that my bladder is a squeeze toy. (Goes to the bathroom.)
Ross: (entering) Hey is Rachel here? We have a doctors appointment.
Rachel: In a minute!!!
Rachel: (entering) All right, all right. Lets go!
Rachel: No, Im fine.
Rachel: Ross, it is 100 degrees outside. For the first time in weeks, I am somewhat comfortable.
Rachel: Oh uh-uh pal! Dont call me mommy! Its bad enough you call your own mother that. (He looks at Monica.)
[Scene: Dr. Longs Office, Ross and Rachel are waiting for the doctor. Ross is drumming his fingers on the bed.]
Rachel: Ross.
Rachel: Can I ask you something?
Rachel: When Carol was pregnant with Ben
Rachel: were you this irritating?
Rachel: Excuse me?!
Rachel: Well then you just must have a natural talent for it.
Rachel: (silently) Okay. (Pause) Seriously, breathe louder Ross! Thats great!
Rachel: Hi Dr. Long, how are you?
Ross: (to Rachel) Oh, youre nice to her.
Rachel: She has the drugs!
Rachel: Okay. (Rachel lies back.)
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Eh, just a tad.
Rachel: Well, we are ready to try anything.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Great! We will do all of those.
(Rachel turns and looks at Ross.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Rachel are there as Phoebe and Monica enter.]
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: No. But she did give us some ideas on how to induce labor.
Rachel: Well, there is one thing that we havent tried, but someone thinks that, (mimicking Ross) "That will open up a can of worms."
Rachel: Why? Why today?
Rachel: Ill take that bet.
Rachel: Well, Im miserable here! I might as well make some money out it!
Rachel: Oh honey, dont worry. I really do feel like tomorrows the day.
(Rachel turns her head to Ross and Phoebe and mouths, "No way.")
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are trying the home remedies again.]
Rachel: Ross IWe tried all the spicy food. Its not working.
Rachel: I am feeling nothing. Speaking of hot, watching you do that really makes me want to have sex with you.
Rachel: Oh come on Ross, why are we wasting our time with this other stuff?! We know whats gonna work! Its doctor recommended!
Rachel: Oh come on Ross, weve done it before well do it again, itll be a nice way to bookend the pregnancy.
Rachel: Make love? What are you a girl?
Rachel: But you will, you will be performing a service. Okay? Just-just think of me as a ketchup bottle, yknow you sometimes you have to bang on the end of it just to get something to come out.
Rachel: Oh, I know it. Youre right. Thats not sexy. Oh Oh! (Drops a fork on the floor.) Whoops! Oh, I seem to have dropped my fork. Let me just bed over and get it. (Tries too, but cant quite seem to make it.) Oh God!
Rachel: Come on Ross! Im miserable here! Come on! You started this, now you finish it! Come on wuss, make love to me.
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: Oh wow! What now Ross youre not gonna talk? How on earth will you ever annoy me? Oh wait a minute, I know. (Mimics his breathing.) I mean youd think the damn jalepeno wouldve cleared up your sinuses, but no!! Thats not enough (Ross jumps over and kisses her.) What are you doing?!
Rachel: (breaking the kiss) Oh God!
Rachel: Oh no. No-no! I think my water just broke.
Rachel: Okay! I got the keys! Okay! Okay!
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: I didnt uh, really have time to read this part of the books, but do you think we have time to
Rachel: Okay.
Phoebe: Is Rachel having the baby?
Rachel: Unbelievable.
RACHEL: Alright, I feel that this is totally unjustified. [Monica starts making faces behind her back] She gave me the green light, I did nothing but-. Do you think I can't see you in the TV set?
Rachel: Very nice touch.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is approaching a customer.]
Rachel: Oh really?! Then how come all your stuff is in this box?! (Monica starts chasing Rachel around the table.)
Rachel: (entering from her room) Okay, gotta go! Wish me luck!
[Scene: Rachels office, shes looking at a picture of Tag when he knocks and enters.]
Rachel: Men are unbelievable.
Rachel: Yeah, you do.
Rachel: Oh.
(In the meantime, Rachel has returned with the perfume and sprays a mist out in front of Phoebe who walks through the mist and does a little spin.)
Rachel: Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be an issue... [Scene: Monica's Apartment, everyone is there and watching a Spanish Soap on TV and are trying to figure out what is going on.]
Rachel: No Ross!! (stands up and moves away from him) Dont! You cant just kiss me and think youre gonna make it all go away, okay? It doesnt work that way. It doesnt just make it better. Okay?
Rachel: Oh but Phoebe, were gonna be late for the movie.
(They struggle for the cart. Finally, Rachel climbs inside of it.)
RACHEL: No sorry hon, Monica's orders.
[Cut to a close-up of Rachel, eagerly awaiting Ross's arrival... not knowing he is getting off the plane with another woman.]
Rachel: Oh, Ross, Im sorry. I completely ruined your evening.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are there. Monica is holding the wrapping paper from one of Rachel's gifts.]
Rachel: Well umm, that one is pretty but uh, I just, I just love this fabric (On the other one.) Sorry.
Rachel: Yeah, it is.
Rachel: Can I please be there when you tell her? (Joey nods yes.)
Rachel: Wh So If neither of you are married by the time youre 40, youre gonna marry Joey.
Dina: Look, Rachels told me how much easier youve made all this on her. Why cant you do that for me?
Rachel: This is a very critical time right now. If you feel yourself reaching for that phone, then you go shoe shopping, you get your butt in a bubble bath. You want her back you have to start acting aloof.
Rachel: Yeah.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is playing his music. Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
Rachel: (softly) I really think you need to go now.
Rachel: (softly) I think you should go.
Rachel: Honey, this will help. (hands him a tub of ice cream)
Monica: Nooo! (Giggles) Okay. (She tries to pull herself up by Rachel and Joeys doorknob, but the door opens and she almost falls into the their apartment. She manages to catch herself.) Whoa! (Stands up, unsteadily) Okay. See I was, I was a little nervous about turning (whispering) thirty. (Giggles.) So the bus boys took me out for some drinks. (Pause) I wanna puke on you later!
Rachel: Well relax, hell be here.
Rachel: Amazingly, that makes sense.
Rachel: Any sign of your brother?
Rachel: Terrible? Hell, I was in Greece! That was a nice hotel! Nice beach, met the nice people. Not to shabby for Rachel. (Goes and puts her luggage away.)
Monica: Phoebe! Rachel! Its Monica! I wonder what you could possibly need me for on such short notice! (She bursts into the apartment to find only Phoebe and Rachel sitting on the couch.) Oh.
Rachel: Yeah, what the hell did I know!
Phoebe: And this is Rachel.
Rachel: Hardy Boy.
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Oh, well, that shouldnt be so hard, now that youre dating. (Imitating men at their worst) "Sweetheart, youre fired, but how bout a quickie before I go to work?"
Rachel: Oh, its a Macys bag!
Rachel: I mean, I'll fly back and forth, they'll fly you out... Anything we want.
Ross: she came and dragged me out of the labor room to ask me why Im not with Rachel.
Rachel: (sarcastic) Oh yeah. There is a plan! Why don't I just start taking my smart pills now?
[Scene: An Emergency Room, Rachel and Monica enter. Rachel is limping and leaning on Monica for support.]
RACHEL: Oh yeah. Well, at least I wasn't too chicken to tell some guy I thought he was cute.
Rachel: Three of your five, what?
Rachel: What do you get? (She throws her pom-poms to Joey and Phoebe and performs a cartwheel.) Emily!! (Tries to do another one.) EmilWhoa!! (She falls in Chandlers room.) Okay! So thats me as a cheerleader! Ta-dum! (Gunthers the only one that claps.)
Rachel: I hate this apartment! I hate the color of these walls! I hate the fact that this place still smells like bird! I hate that singing guy!
Rachel: So?
Ross: I know and I was going to, but I thought it was better that you heard it from Rachels father. Look I I made a mistake, but its only because I really, really like you. Really!
Rachel: Well, it doesnt sound like it! I mean, its pretty easy not to kiss someone, you just dont kiss them! See look at us, right now, not kissing!
Rachel: No, no dont get mad because lookthis is what happened. So I-I started packing, then I realized, "What am I doing? I am lousy at packing!" Right? But you love packing! So, as a gift to you, on our last night, ta-da!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the party continues with Rachel leaning on the counter as Gunther walks in carrying candy.]
[Scene: The Waiting Room, Rachel and Dr. Franzblau have gone to get coffee.]
Rachel: Well, its about time.
Rachel: Well, not myself, but I know other people that have. Ok, you caught me. I'm a laundry virgin.
Rachel: Oh no, no, Ill be there too.
Ross: (to Rachel) Oh hey! Hey uh, you remember the necklace I gave you last year? Can I see it?
<they hug and Rachel has this disgusted look on her face and then Emma starts crying>
Rachel: Oh!
Rachel: Come on!
[Scene: Outside Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is returning.]
Rachel: Okay.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there as Phoebe enters with her nose stuck in a book.]
Chandler: You got it! Here we go! Come on! This is great! (Rachel goes over and unlocks the handcuffs) Ahhh! (He starts rubbing his wrist)
(Chandler starts to leave ashamed of himself, but Rachel stops him in the hallway.)
MONICA AND RACHEL: Bye-bye.
Rachel: Off to see young Ethan?
Rachel: Oooooh. (reads letter) (surprised): Oh! I got an interview! I got an interview!
Monica and Rachel: What?!!
Rachel: Excuse me, there was no time!
Rachel: Joey no, this is wrong! You have to take it back, okay? You dont want to win an award this way. Youre very talented. And someday youre gonna win one of these for real and that one is gonna mean something.
Ross: Well, Rachel moving to another country? Not being able to see her every day. How can I be okay with this?
Man: (to Rachel) Ah, excuse me, are you Rachel Green?
[Since they're alone they start kissing and Ross's hands work their way down until they're on Rachel's butt. Rachel starts laughing.]
Rachel: Then how come it is?
Rachel: Oh man! This is so great! I actually feel like Im going on a real date! Although, I have a hint of morning sickness, and Im wearing underwear that goes up to about (She snaps the waistband on her underwear that is just slightly below her breasts) there.
Rachel: Uh well, y'know what? I don't think if I feel comfortable stealing on my very first day
Rachel: Yeah, well, it's a Mercedes if I move back home. Oh, it was horrible. He called me young lady.
Rachel: All right. Well, if I gonna do this, I'd better keep going.
Rachel: (lifts for a toast) Okay, as everybody has ordered, I would like to start the celebration and make a toast � to Phoebe. She dropped her sock.
Ross: Of course you would, your brains are smaller than mine!! (Rachel nods) Man, I can't compete with the guys she goes out with, they are so out of my league! oh my God!
Rachel: (who has just entered) Ugh! No more crying! Please! I just dumped one cry baby, Ill dump you too!
Rachel: Yeah, I know.
Friend No. 1: Rachel stop!
Rachel: Yeah, so?
Rachel: Oh-oh, you lie.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Okay!
Rachel: Oh, but thats okay.
Rachel: No, she left a message. (He starts for the machine.) (Stopping him.) But it-it kinda got erased. There's just (Pause) something wrong with your machine.
Rachel: Bye!
Rachel: (crying) Itll be a short one.
RACHEL: Well not when they find out you slept with Jason Hurley an hour after he broke up with Monica.
Rachel: Ummm, I think its time to see the ring again. (holds her hand out and they all scream)
ROSS: [pulls Rachel aside] I just, I wanted to thank you for our uh, our little talk before.
Rachel: Why you guys this isn't funny, all right? If I wanted this cake to be a disaster I would have baked it myself!
(Rachel brightly limps back across the apartment with glasses of wine for the cute doctors, leaving an open-mouthed Monica in her wake.)