words in movies
(They grab the luggage and drag it into Joey and Rachels forcing Monica and Chandler to follow.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Ross and Rachel are entering with the rest of the gang already inside.]
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Welcome home.
Rachel: Oh! Look! I have a sonogram picture!
(Rachel looks at Ross and gets his approval.)
Rachel: Well it happened about six weeks ago, and uh I had just got home from work and Ross was already there cause I guess he had been hanging out with Joey.
Rachel: And so I had a lot of work to do so Ross, nice guy that he is, offered to help me out. And then we had a little wine, we got to talking, and the next thing you know out of nowhere Ross comes on to me.
Rachel: What is?
Rachel: That-that you came on to me?
Rachel: But you did! I mean, lets be honest.
Rachel: You know you kissed me first.
Rachel: I was sending you signals?
Rachel: Oh please. Okay, anyone in this room think that I would send Ross begging symbols, please show of hands. (Ross raises his hand and no one else.)
Rachel: Okay. So these signals Ross, explain this to me, cause maybe I need to be more careful. I mean, am I sending you these signals right now?
Ross: Yknow what? Yknow what? Rachel, just-just drop it.
Rachel: No please, show me how I begged you!
Ross: (entering) Rachel wont talk to me! She wont even open the door!
Ross: Filming Rachel is not something I planned. Okay look, heres what happened, and Joey you-you can back me up on this. All right, about-about a month and a half ago I came to you with a problem? Umm, a personal thing.
Ross: Hello! Can I get you anything? Huh? Lens cleaner? Your battery okay? (Rachel bursts in carrying two boxes and Ross jumps up.) Rachel!
Rachel: Oh Ross!
Rachel: Thank God youre here! You have to help me! Were you just talking to yourself?
Ross: What a great idea! That will get Rachel to forgive me!
Rachel: (entering) Hey! Is Ross still here?
Rachel: Oh really? Well how would you like it if I had sex with you and I taped it? (Joey smiles luridly) Oh forget it! (Ross enters.) Oh there he is now, the father of my child, the porn king of the west village.
Rachel: Thank you. (She sets it on the floor and is about to stomp on it with her shoe when the rest of the gang jumps up and yells simultaneously.) What? (They all yell again.) You dont want to see this do you?
Rachel: I am not gonna show you this!
Ross: Look, forget it Phoebe. Okay? Its Rachels tape and she can do whatever she wants with it. And she wants to destroy it. So, end of story.
Rachel: I wanna see it.
Rachel: Clearly you dont want people to see this tape. Now I dont want people to see this tape either, but you so badly dont people to see it makes me want to see it. You see?
Rachel: Ahh, I dont believe you. I think you dont want them to see you begging me. (Goes to put the tape in the VCR)
Ross: Rachel, please
Rachel: Ah, a little preview!
Ross: Fine. Fine, but I want the record to show that I tried to take the high road, because in about five minutes Im gonna be saying (He laughs and points at Rachel sarcastically.)
Rachel: Okay, here we go. (Pushes play.)
Rachel: (on tape) Oh, thank God youre here! You have to help me! Were you just talking to yourself?
Rachel: There I am.
Rachel: (on tape) I screwed up so bad, I told Monica that I would stuff and send all these wedding invitations like weeks ago and I-I
Rachel: (on tape) I-I knowI had put them in in-in my desk at work and I completely forgot about them until today.
(Chandler is shocked and Rachel gets scared of Monica very quickly.)
Monica: (taking Rachels hand) Sweetie okay. Its okay. Everybody made it to the wedding. Im fine.
Rachel: Kinda hurtin my hand though.
Rachel: (on tape) (Ross hands her a glass of wine) I cannot believe that I did this. Especially after Monica just went on and on and on about it! (Mimicking Monica) "Okay Rachel! Here are the invitations Rachel! Now be very careful Rachel! Please, drinking no liquids around the invitations Rachel!" (She tilts her wine glass above and moves it back and forth across the invitations) Whoa oh! Oh-oh-oh! Oh oh-oh-oh
(Rachel hits fast forward. Monica is completely shocked.)
(Rachel stops fast forwarding.)
Rachel: (on tape) Can you believe this is already happening? I mean it seems like yesterday they just got engaged.
Rachel: (on tape) Oh, I remember how we almost. Do you think we wouldve gone through with it? Yknow, if we hadnt gotten caught. Do you think we wouldve done it?
Rachel: (on tape) Oh I wanted to.
(Ross and Rachel trade looks while watching the tape.)
Rachel: (on tape) Interesting.
Rachel: (on tape) Oh yeah, sure.
Rachel: Okay, in about ten seconds youre gonna see him kiss me.
Rachel: (on tape) Ross did I ever tell you about the time that I went backpacking through Western Europe?
(Joeys shocked and everyone else looks at Rachel.)
Rachel: Okay, get ready to see some beggin!
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: What are you talking about?!
Rachel: How do you know about that story?!
Rachel: I heard it from my friend Irene who heard it from some guy!
Rachel: No. No, she told me his name was Ken Adams.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is looking at the tape sitting on the counter as Ross enters.]
Rachel: So uh, apparently people are familiar with the Europe story?
Rachel: It was an amazing night.
Rachel: You think it looked amazing?
Rachel: Yeah, me neither. Yet
Rachel: Yeah, it would be really weird.
(Ross grabs the tape and heads for the VCR as Rachel goes over and puts the chain on the door and locks it.)
Rachel: Good luck to you.
Rachel: Oh please. (He does so.)
Rachel: You are undressing very quickly.
Ross: Six months Rachel, six months.
Ross and Rachel: Ah. (Pause) Oh.
Rachel: Thats what I was gonna say.
Rachel: Thank you! I had just gone to the beach that weekend.
Rachel: Have you been working out?
Rachel: Really? Wow, this is so much better than I
Ross and Rachel: Ohh! Ew!
Rachel: Oh! Oh!
Rachel: Oh God!
Rachel: Oh, make it stop!
Rachel: Make it stop!!
Rachel: Have to make it stop!!
Rachel: All right!!
Rachel: Pheebs...
Rachel: Hello, Chip.
Robin: (starting to cry) Ooh, (to Rachel) Can I have a napkin, please? Could you please hand me a napkin? (Rachel tries to grab one, but is to slow for his tastes.) Would you--Give me this thing (grabs the napkin holder from her.) all right!! Enough! (to Billy) And you are no longer my friend! We are finished! (gets up to leave) Nada!! No more! You are a bastard for doing this!! (Billy follows him) Get away from me!!
Ross: (to Rachel) Look both, Joey and Monica feel the same way that I do. No-no-no-no.
Rachel: Ohh, gosh. You guys, come on, this isI have to meet Joshua! This is my one chance for him to see the fun Rachel. Yknow the "Wouldnt it be great if she was my wife" Rachel. Ohh, all right! Are Joey and Chandler back?
Rachel: Well take Literature!!
Rachel: Chandler gets it! Its Chandler Bing!
Rachel: Ohh-ha-ha!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is there but Rachel.]
(Rachel mouths Shoot! or something similar.)
Rachel: (to the cowgirl) And you are so in style right now. Yknow, I work at Ralph Lauren and the whole fall line has got this like equestrian theme going on. I dont suppose you saw the cover of British Vogue, but
Rachel: Um-hmm.
Rachel: (interrupting) Whoa-ho.
Rachel: Oh honey, Im sorry.
Rachel: Well, she-she ob-obviously saw the tire tracks that were leading up to the closed garage.
Rachel: Ohh! Thats so great!
Chandler: So Rachels all moved out huh? How are you taking it?
Monica: Hey, Rachel, Can-can I see you for a sec?
Rachel: Ill go with you.
Rachel: (laughs) You ah, you didnt say Yes to that did you?
Monica: I knew that! Rachel! Use youre head!
Rachel: What is she doing here?
Rachel: Thank you.
Monica: Good. And Rachel Green too. (Will stops suddenly.)
Rachel: No, Ill think about it. Yeah.
Rachel: Umm, our situation. Yknow umm, what we mean to each other. And I mean we-were having this baby together, and we live together. Isnt that, isnt that weird?
(In the apartment below, Mr.Heckles is trying to relax and read his newspaper, but Rachel is helplessly dangling upside-down with her ankle wrapped up in the Christmas lights.)
Rachel: Okay, wait a minute. Wait a minute, I-I-I, I can't do this. Listen honey, this is, it's not Phoebe's fault. She lent me the earrings, and I lost it. I'm so sorry. Honey, I feel terrible too. (Holds out her arms for a hug.)
Rachel: Well, it was good.. until we got back to our apartment, and then we were fooling around and he started to put his hand up my leg and I kept slapping it away!
(Suddenly Rachel clears her throat and the camera cuts to the rest of the gang staring at them. Needless to say Joey and Ross are shocked and slowly turn their heads to see the gang.)
Rachel: Thats weird, she locked the door.
Chandler: Oh. (Goes and gets Phoebes book as Rachel comes in from her room.)
[Scene: The lecture, Ross is passed out against Rachels shoulder.]
(Rachel goes into talk to Chandler.)
Rachel: Thank you. (Mr. Thompson walks away and after hes left.) Okay, (writing her bid down) twenty dollars.
Rachel: Yeah! Right! Okay, Ill see you guys later. (starts to leave) Woo hoo!
Rachel: You promised you would break up with her!
Rachel: Yeah, you got like 14 hours until she has to be at the airport, and youre sitting here in the hallway with a 28-year-old cheerleader with a fat lip.
Rachel: You never come into this office again!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Rachel, and Joey are eating, and Phoebe is preparing Ben's milk.]
Tag: Yknow, Im actually glad Phoebe called. (He pulls out a stool and Rachel sits down.) I know we broke up because you thought I wasnt mature enough, but Ive really grown up and think we should get back together.
Rachel: I don't know. We were watching TV, and then he pooped in Monica's shoe-
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, Phoebe is talking. It looks like when Rachel and Monica lived in this apartment.]
Rachel: Yeah I know its really boring, but its like a big deal. Anyway, I was thinking about renting Cujo sometime.
Joey: Well, I was thinking that itd probably be okay because Ross hasnt gone out with Rachel in five years!
Rachel: Sophie sit!!
Rachel: Alright, Monica, I want you to have the first taste.
Rachel: Oh! You know, I just... couple of things I tried ... I just sang a little doo... Itsy Bitsy Spider...
Rachel: No! God, would you just calm down!
Rachel: All right, well, you're right, these are the best oatmeal cookies I've ever had.
Rachel: Foot rubs for a month!
Rachel: (happily) Yeah!!
Joey, Rachel, and Ross: Hey!
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: All right, fine. Um, you were not the only one there. (Camera fades to Ross, who's listening very carefully) Joey was there too.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is telling Monica and Rachel what he has to do.]
Rachel: Its me! Good morning!
Rachel: Oh, yeah! Yeah!
Rachel: Okay.
[Scene: Central Perk, its the same scene from the end of last weeks show. Phoebe and Rachel are sitting on the couch as Ross enters.]
Monica: Rachel!
Rachel: What?
RACHEL: Alright you guys, I'm takin' off my shirt.
Rachel: Right!
Rachel: Well, I thought you liked doing it. (Rachel starts out the door and stops.)
Rachel: No.
Rachel: I didnt I never said that.
[Scene: The Moondance Diner, Rachel is talking to Monica about her job.]
Rachel: No! Wait no! Shut upI mean dont cry! Let me get my checkbook! (Grabs her checkbook and runs after him.)
Rachel: Wait, Im not just gonna drink somebodys old coffee.
Rachel: Listen yknow what sir? For the last time, I dont care what the computer says, we did not take a bag of Mashuga nuts from the mini-bar and we did not watch Dr. Do-Me-A-Little!
Rachel: Oh Pheebs, is that a new ankle bracelet?
Rachel: Oh! My hero! What happened?
Rachel: Ok, that's it! Just give'em to me! I'll split them up! (she tries to snatch the bowl from Joey's hands but she can't, so she pinches his nipple and she manages to take it)
Rachel: (shouting) Its All Relative!!
Phoebe: Oh, Rachel and I have appointments to get our hair cut.
Rachel: Go!!
Rachel: Thats not true! (Starts to cry.)
[Scene: A nice restraunt. Rachel is on her date with Michael (MICH).]
Chandler: Phoebe and Rachel! So the people that knew about our wedding before me were you, Phoebe and Rachel, Heldi, and apparently some band called Starlight Magic 7 who are available by the way!
Rachel: (shouting) Im sorry!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is trying to take some aspirin.]
Rachel: Beefsteak Charlies?
Danny: (returning, with a friend) Rachel, this is my friend Tom. (To Tom) This is the girl I told you about.
Rachel: Hey! So, did you quit?
(Rachel starts to laugh.)
Rachel: Oh but Joey, I have to go. Theres no room for a baby here.
Rachel: Where?!
Rachel: (teasingly) And while Im gone dont you boys sneak a taste.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Monica are sitting at the table as Joey enters.]
Rachel: (proud of her self) I almost caught that one!
Rachel: (laughing) What was that?
[Scene: Outside the beach house, Ross is coming out to talk to Rachel.]
Rachel: Oh, you've got Carol tomorrow.. When did it get so complicated?
Rachel: With my alignment. Ive got one leg shorter than the other.
Rachel: You got fired?!
Rachel: Sweety...
Rachel: All right, yknow what? If you dont want to believe me about this, why dont you just come with me to dinner tonight and she will tell you.
Rachel: Mon... Okay... I've gotta... just say what it is I'm gonna say... None of the amazing things that have happened to me in the last ten years, would have happened if it wasn't for you. No-one has been more like a sister to me...