words in movies
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is reading What to Expect When Youre Expecting as Rachel enters from her bedroom.]
Rachel: (looking at her fingers) Oh my God! Let me see that! (Grabs the book from him.)
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Oh Pheebs thats so sweet(Grabs a pair of pants)Ooh, those are so cute!
Monica: (entering) Oh good youre all here. Thanksgiving tomorrow, four oclock. (To Rachel) Oh, guess who I invited. Remember that guy Will Colbert from high school?
Rachel: No.
Rachel: Wow! I dont remember him. Honey, are you sure youre not talking about your imaginary boyfriend.
Rachel: Oh thats nice.
Monica: All right! Okay, its just Phoebe. Wills still on a diet, Chandler doesnt eat Thanksgiving food, and Rachels having her aversion to poultry.
Rachel: Remember I had to leave the room the other day when you had that roast chicken?
Joey: Thats right! Cause Im a Tribbiani! (To Rachel) And this is what we do! I mean we may not be great thinkers or world leaders, we dont read a lot or run very fast, but damnit! We can eat!
Monica: Hey, isnt weird to think about how next year at this time theyll be a little baby at the table? (Chandler turns around in horror.) (Seeing him) Rachels! But good to know where youre at!
Monica: Good. And Rachel Green too. (Will stops suddenly.)
Rachel: (entering, carrying a baking dish) Hi!
Will: (glaring at Rachel) Rachel Green.
Will: Look at her standing there with those yams! My two greatest enemies Ross: Rachel Green and complex carbohydrates.
Rachel: (sees Will) Oh my God Monica, who is that?
Rachel: Oh! I do not remember him! Wow! He's really got that sexy, smoldering thing going on. (We see Will angrily staring at Rachel.) Oh my God, hes Look at the way hes just staring at me. I think hes trying to mouth something to me, but I cant make it out. (Will mouths, "I hate you.")
(They sit down at the table and Will goes to talk to Rachel.)
Rachel: Hi! Will, right?
Rachel: Hi! Im Rachel Green.
Rachel: Really?! Arent you sweet! I gotta tell you though, I am, I am having the hardest time placing you. Oh-oh hang on! Did we umm, did we fool around at Lance Davis graduation party?
Rachel: Thank you!
Monica: (breaking it up) Uh Rachel? Rachel, why dont you sit here? (Next to Joey) And Will you sit way over there. (The other side of the table.)
Joey: (To Rachel) Its like me when I was born.
Rachel: All right, who would uh, like some yams? Will?
Rachel: What? (Joey starts offering Ross some turkey.) Oh yknow what? Can we please keep the chicken and the turkey and everything on the other side of the table? The smell is just yuck!
Rachel: Im sorry. What?
Will: I said it was typical. Typical of you, Rachel Green, Queen Rachel does whatever she wants in little Rachel land. (Does a fake hair flip.)
Rachel: Umm, Im sorry. Do you-do you have a problem with me?
Monica: (To Rachel) Apparently you were umm, a little mean to him in high school.
Rachel: Im-ImI had no idea. Im sorry. I
Rachel: Uh Will umm, I just want to say that Im real sorry for whatever I-I did to you in high school
Rachel: You had a club?!
Will: Thats right, The I Hate Rachel Green Club!
Rachel: Whoa! My God! So what, you all just joined together to hate me?! Who else was in this club?
Rachel: (To Ross) So you were in an I Hate Rachel club?
Rachel: So who else was in this club?
Rachel: So Ross, we went out for two years, and you never told me you were in an I Hate Rachel club.
Rachel: Okay Monica, did you know about this?!
Ross: co-founded. Co-founded the club was because I was insanely in love with you. Obviously I didnt handle it very well. But if you think about it the I Hate Rachel Club was really the I Love Rachel Club.
Will: Uh, except that it was really the I Hate Rachel Club.
Rachel: Okay. So what? You guys would just like get together and like just say mean things about me?
Rachel: What rumor?
Rachel: Ross!
Rachel: What?!
Rachel: (shocked) Oh my God!
Rachel: What?! You heard that?! (Goes and stands behind Joey.)
Rachel: Oh no!!!! Oh my God!! This is all making so much sense to me now! This is why Adam Carter wouldnt go out with me! This is why Billy Tratt would just stay in this region! (Motions to her breasts.) (Joey has turned around.)
Rachel: Monica, how come you never told me this?!
(Joey is now looking at Rachel, and since Rachels standing and hes sitting down and hes not looking at her face You get the picture.)
Rachel: Joey stop staring! Theres nothing there! Its not true!
Rachel: Oh! (Hits him and storms out.)
Rachel: (entering carrying a book) Okay! Okay! Listen to what Sean McMahon wrote in my yearbook senior year, "Dear Rach, youre such a good person." Not girl! Person!
Rachel: (reading what he wrote again) "Dear Rach, youre a great person. Sorry about your tiney-wienie." (Will laughs.)
Rachel: Yes!
Rachel: I dont care how long ago it was! You told people that I was half and half! Yknow what? I just want to point out I never did anything to hurt you in high school.
Rachel: What?
Ross: (shocked) (To Rachel) How did you know that?!!!!
Rachel: Yes it is! I saw you guys going at it behind the card catalog!
Rachel: Ohh, theres a picture of her in the yearbook actually.
Ross: Only when it was damp!! (To Rachel) I cant believe you-you told people about this?! Everybody knew?! Yknow what? (To Will) Im back in the club!
Rachel: WhPhoebe!!
Rachel: All right, yknowFine! You guys have your stupid little club, but I would just like to say is what you did to me is way worse than what I did to you! You gave me a tiney-wienie! (Will laughs.)
Monica: All right, listen youre just being silly. Rachel, even with that rumor you were one of the most popular girls in school and everyone wanted to be like you. One girl wanted to be like you so much she stuffed her pants with a Tootsie Roll!
Rachel: Wow
Monica: And Ross, if it werent for Rachels rumor I mean no one in high school would even know who you were. She put you on the map!
Rachel: Shes right.
Rachel: You can keep those pants by the way.
Rachel: Well, I tried, but then he had a shampoo related emergency. So I guess now it's your turn again.
Rachel: You want me to just quit my job so that you can feel like youve got a girlfriend?
Rachel: Oh, its just an anti-theft device.
Rachel: Well, I... you know, I-I-I don't know what to say... I mean, I never thought of you as a guy who needed his men to be men. You know, 'cause I gotta tell you Ross, it not like you just came in from branding cattle.
Rachel: Yeah, sure, okay. Okay.
Ross: Well I dont know, but how-how great would that be huh? You living in my building. I could help take care of the baby. I can come over whenever I want. (Rachel looks at him.) With your permission.
Rachel: Oh.
[Cut back to Rachels date.]
Rachel: Your parents?
Rachel: Yeah that works.
Rachel: Oh! Get over it soldier, we've gotta do this! (She pulls him towards her and throws him onto the barcalounger) Ok. Aha! You like that huh?
Rachel: Ohh.
Rachel: I ah Oh! Ill squeeze you fresh orange juice every morning!
Ross: Yeah, well you never have the time. I mean, I dont feel like I even have a girlfriend anymore, Rachel.
Rachel: Whoa-whoa, theres two living rooms? God, growing up here, this place mustve been a real babe magnet.
Rachel: Ah.
Rachel: I mean why, of all people would you want to go out with Chip?!
Rachel: Hi you!
Rachel: When?! After the birth of our first secret child?! (To All) Ross didnt get the annulment; we are still married.
Joshua: Uhh, Rachel, my parents
Rachel: Yes!
Rachel: Hello.
Rachel: Yes.
[Rachel gets up and opens the door, yelling after him.]
Rachel: So?
Monica: Uh, huh. (to Ross) Or maybe to a galaxy far, far away. (Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe leave)
Rachel: Shes totally right! When we were together, you got all freaked out about Mark and there was nothing going on.
Rachel: Huh.
Rachel: Absolutely! Absolutely!
Joey: Well, there was that one time that Monica and Rachel got together.
Rachel: Monica, you dont even have a bed, you sleep in a ball on the floor!
Rachel: Im sorry. Im so sorry.
Joey: (to Rachel) I bet I stopped listening before you did.
Rachel: Well it stupid, unfair question!
Rachel: Well it happened about six weeks ago, and uh I had just got home from work and Ross was already there cause I guess he had been hanging out with Joey.
Rachel: (entering) Hey!
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Do you guys want these?
RACHEL: Ok, ok, so you're not a fan, but I mean, come on, you cannot do this to her.
Rachel: Its okay! Its okay! It kicked once, itll kick again!
RACHEL: Yeah, I mean, you know it, I mean, if it were me I, I, you know, I'd want you to, I don't know, like catch me off guard, you know, with like a really good kiss, you know really, sort of um, soft at first, then maybe um brush the hair away from my face, and look far into my eyes in a way that let's me know that something amazing is about to happen.
Rachel: I know Monica's worst Thanksgiving.
Rachel: Hi, uh, nothing. That horrible woman just took my machine.
Rachel (as Monica): Hi, this is my friend Rachel.
Rachel: Okay, Pheebs, I was hoping for more of a change.
Rachel: Youre a pathetic loser, right?
Rachel: Ohh! (Realises that Ross is in the room.) Hi!
Rachel: Okay. (Writes a little more) I am so hot!
Rachel: Oh thank you! Thank you, thank you, thank you! (Monica opens the door.) Emily?
Rachel: What?! Joey got a turkey stuck on his head?!
Rachel: You guys! It was bananas, cream, and beef! I-I just cannot believe that you ate that so that I wouldnt feel bad!
Rachel: What? Shut up! Were winning!
Rachel: Oh, now see thats a fancy but.
Rachel: Okay.
[Scene: The beach house, Rachels bedroom. She is finishing up writing something as Ross walks through the door.]
Rachel: Phoebe, its okay. I like living with Joey.
Rachel: That is not true. She did! She forced me!
RACHEL: You know, actually it's more like, hi.
Rachel: Oh, hmm.
Ross: Right that's why I came over to talk about. Hum...I saw Rachel kissing some guy on your balcony,even though there were NO LIGHTS !
Rachel: Good. Although yknow, he-hes a private guy. Yknow, I wish I could get him to open up a little bit, share some feelings.
Ross: Gunther! Gunther. Gunther, please tell me you didnt say anything to Rachel about me and the girl from the Xerox place.
(Its Rachels turn to open the door.)
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: (to Monica) So, how was your date?
Rachel: Okay, walk us through it, honey, walk us through it.
Rachel: Joey, youre gonna have to stop rushing me, you know what? You dont get any dessert.
Rachel: Man! He just keeps lobbing them up and I just keep knocking them right out of the park!
Joey: Oh, man, she loved it! She's over there showing Monica and Rachel right now.
Rachel: Yeah, and yknow what? I love them both, so why dont you just pick one and thatll be it.
Rachel: I mean y'know, I'm thinking. You could bring her, and you guys could go up to your old room, and not make out.
Rachel and Monica: Ohh! (both grab there stomachs in pain)
(Rachel comes back carrying a shoe box.)
Rachel: Oh.
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Oh, thats sweet.
Rachel: What? Monica, they are cute, they are doctors, (spelling it out in the air for her slow friend) cute doctors, doctors who are cute!
Rachel: No Joey, look. Trust me, all the men are wearing them in the spring catalog. Look. (Shows him.) See look, men, carrying the bag.
Rachel: Oh yeah? Fine.
Rachel: Oh yeah, no, whats that?
Rachel: That would be great!
Rachel: Oh no-no-no-no-no, I'm still waiting to hear from that job and the store closes at nine, so you can eat then.
[cut to Phoebe and Rachel as Monica returns from the bathroom]
Rachel: Oh, I think I saw some in here.
Rachel: Oh, Kim, Hi. (Kim doesnt even look up from her report.)
Rachel: I Am I the only one that this is embarrassing for?
Rachel: (entering) Hi!
Rachel: Why not?
Rachel: Nothing.
Rachel: From now?
Rachel: Well, thats great.
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: You mean, you mean 30 days?
Rachel: Yeah! (She sits down) Sit!
Rachel: In a month?
Joshua: (entering) Hey, Rachel.
Rachel: Im more than okay, I am really, really happy! Wanna know why?
Rachel: Ohh, nothing, I just wanted to see you. See you and hug you. (Hugs him) See you.
Rachel: Let us keep the apartment and
Rachel: Is that the heartbeat?