words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Rachel are there as Ross enters.]
Ross: Hey! Oh, Im so glad you guys are here. Ive been dying to tell someone what happened in the Paleontology department today.
Ross: Professor Neuman, the head of the department, so .
Ross: No, I get to teach one of his advanced classes! (Pause) Why didnt I get head of the department? (Goes and gets some coffee.)
[Scene: N.Y.U, Ross is teaching a class.]
Ross: which brings us back, of course, to Greelys theory of dominance. (The bell rings.) Okay, that-thats all for today. Oh, uh does anyone know where the Freeman building is?
Ross: What?! That-thats all the way cross town, Im supposed to teach a graduate seminar there in ten minutes.
(Ross grabs his things and runs to the door only to be blocked by his exiting students.)
Ross: Move it! Move it! Move it!! Hey!!! Im the teacher!!
[Scene: The Freeman Building, Ross is entering his new class completely out of breath.]
Ross: Hello. (He throws his jacket towards the coat rack and misses.) Im sorry Im a little late. Ah(Checks his watch)Whoa! A lot late. Let me start by uh, by introducing myself, I am Professor Geller. (The bell rings.) So to sum up, Im Professor Geller. Good job today.
Joey: Oh come on! Just pick one! Between Monica, Phoebe, Chandler, and Ross if you had to, if you had to, who would you punch?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is telling Rachel about his class location predicament.]
Ross: No, I ran. It was really far, and when did people stop understanding the phrase, "Get the hell out of my way!"
Ross: Ugh, between the traffic that time of day and all the one-way streets itll take me twice as long. Besides, I teach the class three times a week, who am I? Rockefeller?
Ross: Well I have to. Okay? If I dont, theyll take the class away from me. And I already put it in my family newsletter.
Ross: Youve seen it, the Geller Yeller.
Ross: Besides, I-I think I figured out a much faster route, Im sure I can make it this time. I just I just cant be afraid to get a little bit hit by cars. (He goes to the bathroom as Joey enters.)
[Scene: N.Y.U, Rosss new class, he is entering out of breath.]
Ross: Yeah!!!! Yes, I made it! Im on time! (Grabs a bottle of water from a student, takes a drink, and splashes some on his face like the marathon runners do.) Okay, why dont we all uh, (Exhales loudly) open our books to page 23. Where (Exhales again) Where you will see a uh a bunch of uh red spots. Okay, (Closes his book.) umm, why dont, why dont you all start to read, while I(Passes out and collapses.)
(At this point a stream of obscenities burst forth from Phoebes mouth just in time for Ben and Ross to enter and hear most of it, and in slow motion Ross tries to shield his innocent son from Phoebes vulgarity.)
Ross: Phoebe!!
[Scene: N.Y.U, Rosss new class, this time hes actually about to do a lecture.]
Ross: So is everybody here? I got here a little early myself. Let us begin. Now, the hydrosaurids have been unearthed in two main locations. (He moves to the map and we see why he made it to class on time, hes wearing in-line skates and hasnt taken them off.) Here. (Points to the map, somewhere in the Middle East, then spins on the skates and points to the map.) Here. (China.) Now as for the hydrosaurs
Ross: You did it, man.
Joey: From now on, its gonna be Joey and Ross, best friends. (They shake hands.) Okay! Were gonna be the new Joey and Chandler.
Ross: What?! (Checks his hair.) Give-give me a brush.
Joey: Yeah? Well look Ross, you don't have to. Okay? It's not your fault I suck. I mean what kind of an actor can't even say, "Hmm, noodle soup." (Nods his head in disgust.)
[Scene: The delivery room, Rachel and Ross are entering.]
[Scene: A street, Ross and Emily are walking home from a date.]
Joey: Okay, you picked the Gimmie card! You get all of Rosss points!
(They all go pack except for Ross.)
Joey: Ross! Way to suck up to the family.
Ross: Hate him? I No, I dont hate him. (Pause) Its just its Rachel, yknow?
Ross: (to the gang, whispering) She's talking.
Ross: (on phone) Hello.
ROSS: Doubtful.
Ross: In London!
Ross: (entering) Hi!
Ross: Whoa, hello, did you just meet Monica?
Ross: She wants me to move to London.
Ross: It could happen.
Ross: We have got to start locking that door!
Ross: Yes, tell me.
Ross: I know. I am, I am so sorry.
Ross: Again, very sorry.
Ross: Emily, there is nothing between Rachel and me. Okay? I love you.
Ross: Oh that is so great! That's
Rachel: Hi! Oh, Ross, dont forget, we have that doctors appointment tomorrow!
Ross: I can't believe you let George Michael slap you.
Ross: I know and I was going to, but I thought it was better that you heard it from Rachels father. Look I I made a mistake, but its only because I really, really like you. Really!
Ross: You were incredible! Brand new woman, ladies and gentlemen.
Ross: Oh, no, Mom, its just Monica this year.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is trying to hang up on Julie.]
Joey: Jan-ice. 'Cause I, just, I feel bad for Ross, you know, we-we always go together, we're like the three hocke-teers.
Ross: For what?
[cut to inside Central Perk, we see Ross quietly tapping on the window, desperately trying to get the gangs attention, while Tommy is still screaming at him]
Ross: Thanks.
Ross: Yeahoh! Hey listen umm, Emily found this wedding dress in London
[Scene: The Hospital, Phoebe is arriving with Ross, Joey, and Rachel in tow.]
Ross: Well, so, you-youll get a job here! I mean, Im always hearing about uh, them foreigners coming in here and stealing American jobs; that could be you!
Ross: Oh... ok, fine. But... ehm... I just have one question for you, ehm... (aping Professor Spafford) When we exit should we walk, or run, or prance, or stroll...
Ross: (entering) Hey.
Ross: Monica! (She appears, not sure why she was summoned.)
Ross: Damn!
Ross: Well, okay so, I dont have it all worked out quite yet. Just dont say anything to Rachel, please?
Ross: Umm, Delilah.
Ross: I have no idea. I mean But-but I assure you I will figure it out.
Ross: You deserve to be with someone who appreciates you, and who gets how funny and sweet and amazing, and adorable, and sexy you are, you know? Someone who wakes up every morning thinking "Oh my god, I'm with Rachel". You know, someone who makes you feel good, the way I am with Julie. (Rachel has moved closer, but hearing that she starts to back up.) Was there a second of all?
Ross: Well, the stuff I just mentioned.
Chandler: (To Ross) Why don't you cut him a little slack? Okay? Maybe if he relaxes a little bit, he'll get some work done.
Ross: What?!
ROSS: Hello.� (listens)� Ah, no, she's not here right now.� Can I take a message?� (grabs a pad and pen)� Bill from the bar?� (writes)� Okay, "Bill from the bar."� I'll make sure she gets your number.
Ross: Okay, I uh, I can't see you anymore.
RACH: Alright, fine, you go ahead and you do that, alright Ross.
Ross: Just admit it Chandler, you have no backhand.
Ross: What are you doing?
Ross: Yes! Please!
Ross: That's okay.
Ross: Okay, after you told me she was passed out in our room, I went in there to make sure she was all right. She was lying on my bed, all buried in peoples coats. Well, I went to kiss her on the forehead, you know. But it was so dark, I accidentally got her lips. I started to pull away, but then I felt her start to kiss me back. It was only for a second, but... it was amazing. And now, now I find out that you kissed her first.
Ross: She's doing her laundry.
Rachel: That's not Ross!
Ross: That's not advice!
Ross: I told her I'd have to think about it. I mean, how the hell am I supposed to make this kind of a decision? (They're all quiet.) I'm actually asking you!
Ross: Yeah, cheerie-o!
Ross: Hi.
Rachel: Oh, Ross
Ross: I am so sorry.
Minster: Now Ross, repeat after me. I Ross...
Paul: (entering) Here you go honey! (Rachel kicks Ross back under the couch.)
Ross: Well, what-what would you do? Rach, if you were me, what-what would you do?
(They enter Ross's apartment. Ross is already quite hyper.)
Ross: (mouths "where?") Uh... Oh hey, do you, uh (steps on some garbage and falters) ...do you have any, um, Cinnamon Fruit Toasties?
Ross: Grazie.
ROSS: Uh, aside from that, the whole evening was pretty much a bust.
Chandler: Yeah Ross, I mean... we're excited to hear the speech but the rest of the time we're gonna wanna do, you know, "island's stuff".
Rachel: Ross, I watched you get hypnotised in Atlantic City.
Joey: No, no, it's not, don't listen to him! (to Ross) I'm gonna thump you! (points his fist at him)
Ross: Okay, good bye! (leaves)
ROSS: You like that do ya?
Ross: (entering) Hey!
Ross: Meth-methane smells
Ross: Touched. Used. Sat on. Sleep on.
Ross: How could you have told her?
Chandler: Yes, it does bother me! And I think it would bother a lot of people. Rachel, when you were going out with Ross, did it bother you when he flirted with other women?
Ross: Hey. (To his parents) Happy Thanksgiving!
Ross: (reading the newspaper) Hey, heres a question; where did you guys get the finest oak East of the Mississippi?
ROSS: I don't know what to do. What am I gonna do? I mean, this, this is like a complete nightmare.
Joey: What's the matter Ross?
(Ross enters the room, takes off his robe and enters the booth. He stands with his back to the nozzles and then realises that this booth has nozzles at both sides of the wall)
Monica: But you live here! (Ross rolls his eyes.) You know that.
(Ross exits.)
Ross: (laughs as well, but for a different reason) Yeah, I didnt think of that.
Ross: Well, I was going to stick it in the ATM, but now I think Ill show the sexy teller that I am a published writer.
Ross: So, I'm guessing you had an extra ticket and couldn't decide which one of you got to bring a date?
Ross: Na-huh.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Monica are eating breakfast as Joey enters, very happily.]
Ross: Excellent! How do you put a baby down for a nap?
Ross: Really?! Wow! Thats-thats so nice, what are you gonna get me?
Joey: I dont get it! It was in my room all night! And if she didnt take it, and I didnt take it; and you (Chandler) didnt take it, then who did? (The duck quacks.) Shh! Were trying to think! (Ross and Chandler realise it at the same moment and stare at Joey, who doesnt get it. After a short pause, with the duck still quacking, Joey figures it out and starts pointing at the duck.)
Ross: Good, you don’t want to be one of those mothers who pass on their irrational fears on their children, do you?
[Scene: Rachels Room, Joey moves Rosss coat to get the tissues Rachel wants and the engagement ring box Mrs. Geller gave him falls out of the pocket it was inside. Joey goes to one knee, picks up the box, opens it, and sees that its an engagement ring.]
Ross: So uh, where's Monica?
Ross: Why?