words in movies
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is filing her nails as Ross and Ben enter.]
Ross: Hi.
Ross: Hi, we have a little bathroom emergency.
(Ben starts to go, but Ross stops him.)
Ross: Uh, before we do uh, are any of Joeys special romance magazines in there?
Ross: (to Ben) Okay! All clear!
Ross: (to Ben) Everything okay in there?
Ross: Hey listen can you do me a big favor? The deans office just called and said there was an urgent meeting. Can you watch Ben for like an hour?
Ross: Oh, she isnt home.
Ross: Well, Ben would be there.
Ross: Whats the matter?
Ross: Rach, hes not an ex-con.
Ross: I dont know! Just-just talk to him-entertain him and keep him alive.
Ross: Okay. (Ben enters) Ben? Come here. All right, Im gonna leave you here with Aunt Rachel for about an hour. Okay? Are you gonna be okay?
Ross: (To Rachel) I wasnt talking to you.
Ross: Okay, Ill see you soon buddy. (He hugs and kisses him.) Be back in an hour.
Rachel: Bye. (Ross exits.) Ahhh (Silence) So this is fun, huh?
(She opens the door to reveal Ross with a pencil mark from his forehead to his chin.)
Ross: I have a bone to pick with you.
Ross: Yes! Ben learned a little trick.
Ross: Thats right! Thats right! Saran Wrap on the toilet seat so the pee goes everywhere!
Ross: Yeah that! You know I hate practical jokes! Theyre mean and theyre stupid and-and I dont want my son learning them!
Ross: I was barefoot. Now tell me, the toilet thing is the only thing you taught him right?
Monica: No that is not what happened with us. Well, I was umm, I was really sad that night because this guy that I was Rosss mom.
(Theres a knock on the door and Ross enters.)
Ross: Rachel! What are you doing here?
Ross: Your good friend?
Ross: Whats her last name?
Ross: Nice. And by the way that uh, that line down my face?
Ross: Wh-wh-what line? The line that prompted a student in my last class of the day to say uh, (In a college frat boy voice) "Dude, dont you ever was your face?"
Ross: Of course I was mad! I told you I-I hate this stuff! Okay? It-its not funny!
Carol: (entering from the kitchen) Hey Ross!
Ross: Hi.
Ross: Practical jokes.
Ross: You have a line down your face.
Ross: Uh, yknow what? Ill tell you who it hurts! It hurts the kid who has all his clothes stolen in gym class so he has to go to the principals office wearing nothing but a catchers mitt!
Ross: I will be! Listen, I dont want you teaching my son that stuff anymore. Okay?
Ross: No thats not what I want. Uh, Im glad you guys were bonding but I
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is in the kitchen as Ross and Ben are entering.]
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Hey Im sorry to do this to you again but uh, is there any way you can look after Ben for a little bit? I-Ive got this meeting at school. And-and he-he asked for his uh, Fun Aunt Rachel, so
Ross: Okay, Ill see you later pal.
(Ross turns to leave.)
Rachel: Ohh, okay. (Ross has a sign on his back that reads Poop.) WhAh-ha! (Ross stops and turns.) Wait a minute. Uh Ben, I cant do it.
Ross: What?
Rachel: I cant let him go out that way, hes got a meeting. (To Ross) Youve got something here on your back.
Ross: What? (She takes the sign off and hands it to him.) Thats great. That is great. (Crumples up the paper and throws it down in anger.) What did we just finish talking about Ben?!
Ross: All right, thats it! (He runs over to Ben, but he runs past him and out the door.) Comeyouno! You are in big trouble young man!
[Cut to the hallway, Ben runs upstairs with Ross in pursuit.]
Ross: Wait! No! Ben, come here! I am not kidding!
Ross: I-I-am(Suddenly Ross starts screaming and comes falling down the stairs landing just in front of Rachel.)
Ross: Mon?
Ross: Wait a minute, look.
Ross: Hey.
Ross: We're all alone in an empty apartment.
Ross: No, no it's, um, it's not you, um, it's um, it's (turns and sees his Mom standing where Rachel is)
Ross: There it is.
Ross: And it works both ways.
Ross: Oh.
Ross: Uh, yeah, yeah I'll, I'm right behind you.
Ross: That only took me an hour.
Ross: Yep.
Ross: Bye sweetie.
Ross: Shoot.
Ross: You're my friend. I-I had to tell you.
Ross: Rachel. Rachel Rachel. (Sits down beside her) I love you the most.
Ross: No no no, believe me. No one has been waiting for this as much as I have, ok? And you know what the funny thing is? When this day is over, you get to go home with the baby, ok? Where does that leave me?
Ross: What?
Ross: What are you talking about?
Ross: I would, but I bruise like a peach. Besides, y�you know, everything is gonna be fine. The baby�s sleeping.
Mike: (Ross opens the door) You know I'm trying to think of the last time I opened a door and you weren't there, Phoebe are you ok? (She has her hands over her mouth)
Ross: You let Rachel come back, and it’s done.
Ross: C'mon, you get the idea, ow-ow-ow we'll make our money back in no time!
Ross: Crazy.
Ross: I'm gonna tell Mom.
Monica: Come on Chandler, come on, I can handle Ross. (They go to the door. Ross is trying to stick his hand through and undo the chain; Monica pushes his hand back.) (To Ross) Hold on! (She opens the door.) Hey Ross. What's up bro?
ROSS: Too easy? Too...The process of every living thing on this planet evolving over millions of years from single-celled organisms, too easy?
ROSS: Y-ello. No, Rachel's not here right now, can I take a message? Alright, and how do we spell Casey, is it like at the bat or and the Sunshine Band? OK, bye-bye. Hey, who's this uh, this Casey?
Ross: He is saving your butt, ah, unless of course Im stepping on some toes here, in which case I can just mosey on, Ive got plenty of people to help on the Interstate.
Ross: Okay. (Sits down next to Phoebe.) You uh, you wanna hear something weird?
Ross: No. Rachel hooked me up with a tux! But not just any tux, Batmans tux!
Ross: (gasps) Hi... There she is. Hi Emma. Oh my God, I missed you. (kisses her) Oh Emma, I missed you so much. Hey... Did you have a good time with grandma Green? Huh? Did she give you a bottle of anti-depressants again to use as a rattle? (to Rachel)
ROSS: Any time. [He doesn't want to let her go]
Ross: (entering) Hello.
Ross: Oh, but-but it is, uh, its just like the first Thanksgiving, when the Indians and the Pilgrims uh, sat down to dinner.
Ross: (to Chandler) Are you intrigued?
Ross: Okay, okay, yes, it is. (waves) How about I'll, uh, catch up with you in the Ice Age.
Ross: Thats what?!
Ross: Listen. Oh hey, hey, the important thing was that she meant, she meant nothing to me!
Ross: Listen. Um, listen. Something you should... know... um, Rachel and I... we're kind of a thing.
Phoebe: Ross, its not that big a deal! So youll been divorced three times, youll still have a life, youll go on dates
Monica: (to Ross) Are, are you okay? I mean, do you want me to stay?
Joey: Well, I was trying to figure out how to get to Buckingham Palace, right? So, Im in my map and-and (Ross enters) Hey!
Ross: Anyway, suddenly I'm down field, and I realise that I'm the one who's supposed to catch him, right? Only I know there is no way I'm gonna get there in time, so I am running, and running, and that, that is when I woke up. See I, I am so not ready to be a father.
Ross: No, I'm sorry. Look I don't think that's what you wanna hear right now but I can't help it. I love marriage.
ROSS: Marenge,
[Scene: Outside of Elizabeths dormitory, Ross is exiting after breaking up with her and we can hear his thoughts.]
ROSS: There we go. All better. (gives Ben back to Monica)
ROSS: How can you not believe in evolution?
Mona: No, no. Listen, Ross is too nice to say anything, but this is his apartment, and, and, we gotta have some boundaries, so why dont you go back to your place and give us some privacy?
ROSS: Wow, well uh, uh, actually, Julie's downstairs getting a cab, I just need the cat toy, did Monica say. . . What? Why, why are you looking at me like that? RACH: I don't know, I, I feel like I had a dream about you last night but I, I don't remember. ROSS: OK. Oh, oh, oh. [runs over and picks up the cat toy] RACH: Did we speak on the phone last night? Did you call me? ROSS: No, I stayed at Julie's last night. RACH: Huh. ROSS: Oh, actually I haven't even been home yet. Do you mind if I check my messages? RACH: Oh yeah, go ahead. [Rachel walks in her room. Ross picks up the phone and dials his machine to check his messages.] ROSS: Rach, I got a message from you. [pauses] Who's Michael? [Rachel comes out of her room, suddenly she remembers leaving the message.]
(Mrs. Geller leaves as Ross re-enters the room.)
Phoebe: (sees Ross) Oh Ross no. Be careful, that is very old! Okay? Early Colonial bird merchants used to bring their birds to market in that.
Ross: No, because your not upset.
Ross: Hey, what are you doing shopping at eight in the morning?
Ross: OK.... um, a weird thing happened to me on the train this morning...
Joey: Okay, Ross, I realise that you didn't expect to walk in and see that, but.. Let me explain, okay?
Rachel: No Ross!! (stands up and moves away from him) Dont! You cant just kiss me and think youre gonna make it all go away, okay? It doesnt work that way. It doesnt just make it better. Okay?
Ross: Joey comeI cant believeI bring you here to see the Bapstein-King comet, one of natures most spectacular phenomenon, and all you care about are bugs stuck in tar and-and some woman!
Ross: Look, if youd had two failed marriages, youd understand!
Ross: Ah actually we dont. (Ross walks off)
Ross: I don’t know. Phoebe, if one of us saw Mike with another woman would you want us to tell you?
Ross: So, are you gonna see him again?
Ross: Okay, okay, okay.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is playing his music. Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
(Ross and Julie enter.)
(Ross recognises her and goes over to the couch, mouthing Oh my God
Ross: I'm gonna use the cushion.
Ross: What?
Ross: What?
Ross: Hey! Hey! If he's moving, maybe I should try to get his place!
Ross: Okay.
Ross: What are you talking about?
Ross: (moving over to stand in front of her) Okay, okay. This morning you said there was nothing so big that we couldnt work past it together...
Ross: There was no song. (to Monica) There was no song!
Ross: How's the maniac?
Ross: Well Im, Im a little slow. (To himself) Just as our children would be.
Ross: She is a kook.
Ross: Hey.
Ross: Thank you.
[Scene: Rosss Bedroom, Ross is waking up. He straightens himself out on the bed and puts the covers over his head.]
Ross: Not that big a deal? It's amazing. Ok, you just reach in there, there's one little maneuver, and bam, a bra right out the sleeve. All right, as far as I'm concerned, there is nothing a guy can do that even comes close. Am I right?
Ross: No wait! Look, wait! Okay, you can hang up, but I'm gonna keep calling! I'm gonna, I'm gonna call everyone in England if that's what it takes to get you to talk to me!
Ross: Rach, do you uh, are you gonna separate those?
Ross: Hi, welcome, to an adult conversation.
Ross: Come on. (She gets on the bike.) All right, here we go. All right? (They start.)
[Scene: At Chandler and Joey's. Ross and Chandler are there. Ross is watching wrestling.]
Ross: (Pause) Of course I am! (Joey is relieved) Okay, let's go godfather.
Ross: Susan Sarandon.
The Man: (To Ross) Excuse me. (He puts up a flyer that has a sketch drawing of Joey and it reads, "Warning! Intruder! If you see this creep - call the cops!") You should check this out, tell the other tenants. Apparently he's running around looking for some kind of a hot girl.
[Scene: Monica’s Apartment. Rachel, Ross, Monica and Chandler are there, Phoebe enters the room]
Ross: And!! Isabella Rosselini.
Ross: Are you insane? C'mere, Marcel, c'mon. (Marcel starts to go to him)
Ross: I've seen her at work, but I always figured, ah-huh? But, uh, I made her dinner. We had a great time. And we're going out again tomorrow.
Joey: Okay, the next situation is for Rachel. The wedding is about to start you walk into the back room and you find Monica taking a nap with Ross. (Ross lies on the floor.) Ill be Monica. Go! (He jumps down and cuddles up with Ross.)
Ross: (recovers his composure and starts typing) Respectfully, professor R. Geller. (hits <return>, closes the laptop and joins Charlie on the sofa) Hey!
Ross: (entering) Hey!
Ross: That would be me.
Rachel: Ross, it is 100 degrees outside. For the first time in weeks, I am somewhat comfortable.
Ross: Okay!! Okay!!
Monica: Ross and I always wanted to be Donny and Marie.