words in movies
Aired: 12/12/2002 Written by: Doty Abrams Directed by: Kevin S. Bright Transcribed by: Stephan Hoffmeister
Rachel: (Reading from a tag that's attached to the shoe) "Dear losers, do you really think I'd hide presents under the couch? P.S.: Chandler, I knew they'd break you."
Rachel: No its not!
Joey: They have a kid together, y'know. Theyre like, theyre like a family, and if, I dont know, theres chance they could make that work, I know I wouldnt want to be the guy who stood in the way of that. Are you okay? Do you wanna ah, come poke a nude guy?
(Ross gets fed up with Joeys banging and stops him by pulling him away from the door.)
Phoebe: Yeah, but youve got to pull yourself together! Monica cant see you like this! Then shell know somethings wrong!
Rachel: Okay, look, Ross, I realise that my Father is difficult, but thats why you have got to be the bigger man here.
Frank: Well um, I was in ah Mrs. Knights ah, I mean Alice, sorry, Alice, I always do that. I was in her ah, Home Ec class.
Rachel: Thats not true! (Starts to cry.)
Ross: Oh-oh, youre-youre fellow scholars. What exactly were you looking for, hmm? Perhaps, (Grabs a book from the shelf behind him) perhaps Dr. Chester Stocks musings on the Smiledon Californicus?
Chandler: Its your parents anniversary and youre going to talk about their dead pet?
Rachel: Oo, I cant watch this, its like Sophies Choice.
Rachel: Well, at least thats a great suit.
[Scene: Joannas office, Rachel and Chandler are still negotiating.]
Bonnie: You guys, the waters great. You should really go in.
Rachel: Oh-oh, sorry, its this way, its this way. (Motions to the correct way.)
Chandler: Thats still yours. Okay, now remember its a surprise party. So, when you go in, act surprised.
Phoebe: Thats right, exactly. (sees them) All right, its a good bye kiss, thats good. (Frank picks Alice up and they move to the couch) Bye-bye. (They both lie down on the couch and start to make out.) Okay, no, the important thing is that you see what Im saying, y'know, just y'know, this is clearly wrong. (They ignore her) Okay, Ive decided Im gonna let this happen! Okay, can I just get my purse? (She reaches in and Alice moans) Okay, all right, good. (leaves).
Rachel: Yeah, thats true.
Rachel: Oh! Did you hear that?! My dads proud of me! My dads proud of me.
Guru Saj: Well its gone.
Joey: Oh-ooh, thats the turn-on.
Ross: Ben, say hi to Aunt Monica. (He holds the phone to the fake Ben he has created out of a pumpkin.) Oh, I guess he doesnt feel like talking right now. Hes smiling though! Okay, talk to you later.
Phoebe Sr: No-no-no, the-the puppys yours.
Joshua: Ah, thats okay, thanks.
Joey: Whats ready?
Rachel: Yeah, my mom got my dads season tickets in the divorce, so she just gave them to me.
Phoebe: But, I mean, do you think hes gonna enjoy it when hes up to his elbows in the diapers from all the babies they have to have right away?! This is not fair to Frank, (she walks behind them again, and hey again turn to follow her) and it-its not fair to the babies, and y'know what, its not good home economics.
Chandler: Oh-no, hes right.
[Joey walks back inside just as Rosss dance is finishing.]
Monica: Whats Phase Two?
The Interviewer: (returning) So, as Joeys friends, is there anything that you guys think our readers ought to know?
Ross: I dont know, I could maybe go out for a couple of beers, but theres this thing about bumblebees on The Discovery Channel that I was planning to watch.
Kate: Nooo. And theres really no reason he should find out, so ah lets not make a big deal about it, okay?
[Scene: Mr. Treegers apartment, Joey is there to suck up.]
[Scene: Monicas new kitchen, Allesandro is introducing her to her new employees.]
Joey: (to Rachel) Will you hurry up? Did you not hear me before when I told you that all of Janines friends are dancers?! And that theyre going to be drinking alot!?
Allesandro: Its Allesandro, from Allesandros.
Rachel: (grabbing a beer out of the chairs fridge) I am so psyched I kept this chair for myself!
Joey: Yeah, theres this superintendents dance, the Super Ball. I dont know, and he wants to impress Marge, this lady super that hes a crush on.
Joey: No-no-no, Im serious. You dont smell it? Somethings on fire.
Monica: Uh-oh, whats the matter?
Ross: Great! Great. Then I mustve left it at Monas. I knew it!
Monica: I think shes here.
Ross: Oh, no, no, no, its-its not the lecture ah, I mind, umm....
Chandler: No-no-no! It is going to be okay, because Mrs. Braverman is gonna send away for a free one and that way we all win! The only losers are the big cheesecake conglomerate, (Reading the label) Mommas Little Bakery. (Pause) I feel terrible, Im a horrible, horrible, horrible person.
Chandler: (lying) Yes, but if its any consolation, before the bird dropped it, he seemed to enjoy it.
[Scene: Rosss bedroom, Rachel getting into bed while Ross is reading and laughs.]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Ross is telling Rachel and Monica about yet another mistake hes made with a woman.]
Monica: Ah, well if you dont clear this off, you wont be getting one of those from me. But Bens coming over here tomorrow to play this game, this cant be there.
Joey: Hey, hey, hey, hey. Look. I take a girl out, she can order whatever she wants! The more, the better! All right? Just don’t order a Garden salad and then eat my food! That’s a good way to lose some fingers!
Phoebe: Shhh!! Please! Whats he saying?
Rachel: Im great! Im great. Ive got a great job at Bloomingdales, have wonderful friends, and eventhough Im not seeing anyone right now, Ive never felt better about myself.
Rachel: No, its Ross. Its Ross. You like Ross. (He just shakes his head.) Oh daddy, I hope youre okay with all of this. I mean think about it, this is a good thing. Youre gonnaThis is your first grandchild! Youre gonna be a poppy!
Ross: Nooo, but it, but its great.
Phoebe: (to Joey) Youre Franks best man?!
Kate: Well, I dont understand why Adriennes attracted to Victor.
Rachel: Yknow what? No. Its not over until someone says, "I do." (Exits)
Trudie Styler: You must be Bens mum.
Monica: And thats why, Im not inviting you in for a drink. (starts to leave) Bye.
Joey: (sticking his head out the window) Hey, the fights starting!
Rachel: Ummm, I think its time to see the ring again. (holds her hand out and they all scream)
Ross: Oh, yeah, that’s the same, I am sure there are thirty different species of poisonous swings!
Monica: Nooo! No, thats not true. No, best time ever! Yeah, you rocked me world! (She turns out the light to go back to sleep.)
Monica: Come on Rach, come on. Lets see whats it like to be on a winning team for a change.
Ross: Eh, either way Ill pass. (Quietly to Chandler) I still cant eat those. (Monica is getting something out of the fridge and starts laughing.) Whats so funny?!
Ross: I justI-I cant believe shes-shes dating?!
Rachel: Oh my God! The millionaires here!
Rachel: (taking the brush back) Okay. Lets use this brush. (Hands him another one.)
Ross: Uh actually Joey, its the Cretasous period.
[cut to Phoebe Sr.s house, from the last episode]
(Chandler walks into the living room, and sees all of Joeys sisters, all wearing red.)
Joey: Oh, its great! Its a great place to just kinda, sit, hang around, drink a few beers, eat some chips. (He says that as he sits, hangs around, drinks a beer, and eats a chip.)
[Scene: The Doctors office, Dr. Zane is examining Phoebe as Frank and Alice watch.]
Joeys Sister: (whispering in his ear) Just do it.
Joey: Yeah, come on, think about it. Youre 18, okay, shes 44, when youre 36, shes gonna be 88.
Rachel: Tommys supposed to be here soon, were going to lunch.
Ross: Yeah, its hard okay, I only have two spots left.
Chandler: Hey, come on, its not your fault.
Chandler: Joey! Joe! (Sees that hes not here and starts investigating. He picks up the bag of chips.) Full bag. (He picks up the beer.) Beers still cold. Something terrible mustve happened here! (He decides its not that important; sits down on Rosita, and the back falls off causing him to flip over.) Oh no-no-no-no-no-no! (Runs over to Stevie.) Stevie, I was never here! (Runs out.)
Rachel: Yeah, Im pretty confident about that. Thats what makes it so easy for me to be 80% happy for Monica and Chandler! It would be nice to have a little guarantee though.
Joey: Hey! Whats up?
Ross: You know, I think that�s a good idea�our babysitter just pounded in another Chardonnet. (both get up) Bye, y�guys.
Rachel: Its Joshua.
Phoebe: Yes, and Im sorry. I-I know things worked out for Chandler and Monica, but thats very rare.
Phoebe: Lets try something else, lets play a game.
Rachel: Thats right! You do what the hand says!
Ross: Oh, yeah, that would be me, um, I have, I have a problem I-I tip way too much, way, way, too much, its a sickness really.
Ross: Hey Chandler, theres a party tomorrow, youll feel better then.
(Chandler grunts and turns around, sees that hes in sight of the room, and mouths damn!)
Paul: (jumping up) Elizabeth! Oh look, Elizabeths here! Who are you talking to?
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, David has a cab waiting to take him to the airport and hes saying goodbye to Phoebe.]
Monica: Thats-thats not Phase Three.
Rachel: (motioning to a rack) So now, these are all the tuxedos that we make and if theres anything that you like, we can make you a deal. Anything at all. (Grabs a few) But these are the three that Monica pre-approved.
Ross: But-but, Liams on my team.
Conan: And then it just builds on itself and theres no doing the scene after. I mean you probably wait and really get it together and do it.
Monica: Honey, we were at this beautiful place, and I-I-I just put our names down for fun! I mean, whats the harm in that?
Phoebe: All right, all right, well just do our best. Okay? So lets say Im the interviewer and Im meeting you for the first time. Okay. "Hi! Come on in, Im uh, Regina Philange."
Joey: Okay, and ah, this one here is a Douglas Fir, now its a little more money, but you get a nicer smell.
Ross: Good! Me neither! So its not a problem. Were just two friends who happen to be roommates.
Phoebe: Ohh, thats too bad!
Cassie: Ill always remember that summer, because its when I got all of these freckles. (She pulls her blouse open to show him her shoulder and bra strap.)