words in movies
Chandler: It just keeps getting worse and worse! Y'know? I mean its bad enough that Im in love with my roommates girlfriendwhich by the way, I think she knows. Because every time were in the room together theres this weird like energy between us. And call me crazy, but I think she likes me too. And now I have seen her naked. I mean at least when Ive seen her with clothes on, I could imagine her body was like covered in boles or something. But there are no boles, shes smooth! Smooth! (leaves)
Joey: What is the big deal? Its not like were exclusive.
Chandler: Look, Joey, Kathy is clearly not fulfilling your emotional needs. But Casey, I mean granted I only saw the back of her head, but I got this sense that shes-shes smart, and funny, and gets you.
Chandler: All right look, I think its time for you to settle down. Y'know? Make a choice, pick a lane.
Joey: Whos Elaine?
Phoebe: Oh yeah, thats right, the keyboards, huh?
Ross: Yeah, just a little in high school, but then I really got into it in college. I mean thats-thats when I really found my sound.
Ross: Really? No. I mean, nah, I havent played in so long, and-and, well its-its really personal stuff, yknow?
Ross: Here we go. (Plays one note) Yknow, Ive-Ive never played my stuff for anyone before, so its important that-that you understand its about communicating very private emotions. (Plays another note) Yknow, umm, you should-you should think of umm, my work as wordless sound poems. Thats what Im
Ross: Wow! Thanks, you guys. Thats uhohhh, I wanna, I wanna play you another piece! Umm! Uh-oh! I left my uh, helicopter sounds on another disk. Ill be right back! Okay? (Runs to fetch them) This is so nice, ImI am so (starts to break up and leaves)
Phoebe: What are you guys talking about, I loved it! It was soo moving. Oh, plus its just, its so different from the stuff you usually hear.
(Theres a knock on the door.)
Kathy: (entering) Hey! (sees whats on TV) Oh God, is that Baywatch?
Chandler: No-no, hes not back yet, but hell be here any minute. So uh, come on in. Have a seat. Bow or stern?
Joey: (on the other end at a pay phone) Hey, its me. Listen Casey and I were on our way back and had a little car trouble.
Chandler: (to Kathy) Uhh, that was Joey. Hes running a little late, he says hes sorry.
Chandler: So I guess its just uh, you and me then.
Kathy: Yeah, I do. Of course, I learned at my aunts dog grooming shop, but hey, what do you say?
[Cut to later, Kathy is cutting Chandlers hair.]
Kathy: Checking to see if its even.
Chandler: (jumping up to answer the phone) Oh the phone! The phones making sounds! (On phone) Hello!
Joey: (on phone) Hey dude, its me.
Chandler: Hey its Joey!
Kathy: (on phone) Hey. (listens) Oh no its fine, dont worry about it. (listens) Yeah-no, stop apologizing, its okay. (listens) Yeah! Ill talk to you tomorrow. (hangs up) (to Chandler) I should uh, probably go.
Chandler: No-no-no-no, this is bad! Its bad! This is bad!
Kathy: No, but thats bad!
Chandler: Ooh! Yes! Okay! Heres what we do, we-we forget it happened.
Chandler: I have to; hes my best friend, and youre seeing him.
Monica: (to Rachel and Phoebe) Y'know, theres a Starbucks about three blocks down.
Phoebe: (pushing Monica back onto the couch) Its so inspired! Look at him! Look at him go!
[cut back to Ross who finally finishes his so-called song with the same crash from before. He gets some applause, mainly cause hes done.]
Phoebe: Oh my God, hes not even appreciated in his own time. I would give anything to not be appreciated in my own time!
Joey: (very excited) A TV as if it appears from nowhere! Thats the dream! Man, how did you afford this stuff?
Joey: No-no-no, I think Im gonna see how things go with Kathy. Shes pretty cool.
Joey: Yknow what I think? I think somebodys got a little crush on Casey. How bout I fix you two up? What do you think?
Chandler: Oh, dont say that! Dont say that. Thats not true. Is it?
Phoebe: Yeah! No, thats right. And I thought it was a really good idea.
Joey: Whats up?
Chandler: Its-its about Kathy. Umm, uh, I like her. I like her a lot actually.
Joey: Well, youre timing couldnt be better. Shes not my girlfriend anymore.
Joey: Just now, after acting class. At first I thought she was doing some kind of scene, thats why I let people watch.
Joey: No-no-no, no its uh, its okay.
Joey: But hey, listen just so you know, you might have youre work cut out for you. Cause when I talked to her, I kinda got the feeling that shes into some other guy. So
Chandler: See uh, thats-thats actually what I wanted to talk to you about. I-I think I know who the other guy is.
Chandler: Its me. Im the other guy.
Joey: What?!! Thats even worse!!
Joey: I dont know! But its the same!
Chandler: Look, Im sorry! But theres nothing I can do, I think Im in love with her!
Joey: Is that why you bought all this stuff?! (Chandler makes a face like "Well, kinda.") Well, yknow what I will not watch your TV, I will not listen to your stereo, and theres a cinnamon raisin loaf in the new bread maker that Im not gonna eat! You know why?!
Joey: Because its all tainted with your betrayal. From now on this apartment is empty for me! And Im not happy about you either. (The bread maker dings) Oh, and just so you know, I made that bread for you. (Joey walks into his bedroom and slams the door.)
Phoebe: Oh my God, hes lost it. Hes totally lost it.
Joey: Oh yes I do. Otherwise whats next? Today Im just a guy who cant finish a turkey, but tomorrow Im the guy who eats half a Powerbar, wraps up the rest, and puts in the fridge? No! No, I just I justI gotta change my pants. (Gets up and heads for the door.) Jeans have no give. (Exits.)
Phoebe: (thinking to herself) Okay, baseball. Rick, playing baseball. Okay, slides into second, maybe even his pants come down a little Oh nowait no, no! No! Okay, all right, sandwiches, sandwiches. Umm, okay, on a plate, maybe Ricks pants come down a little. No! No! Okay, Chandler! Okay Chandler, ooh, thats working.
Phoebe: Okay. But the question is whos gonna go first. Cause whoever goes second is the bitch.
Monica: (hearing that) Thats it big girl! (Hits Janine in the butt with the garbage bag) Come on!
Ross: Hey, its been like three weeks!
Chandler: Its incredible, I mean one minute shes inside you and then 47 hours later here she is.
Mark: Thats okay.
Monica: Its not?
[Scene: Joshuas parents apartment, Rachel and Joshua are entering.]
Joey: (holding an empty tissue box) Wheres all the tissues?! (Throws the box down in disgust.)
[Scene: Central Perk, the gangs all there discussing the incident.]
Monica: So, Chandler, whos on your list?
Monica: And what if I was still fat? (To Chandler) Well, you wouldnt be dating me, thats for sure.
[Rachels boss, Joanna, enters]
Chandler: Thats the stuff! (quickly grabs it)
Joanna: (to Rachel) So ah, whats wrong with him?
Monica: Whats this?
Monica: You touch peoples eyeballs every day and this feels weird.
Ross: Sure, whats up?
Phoebe: Umm, Im sorry. Wont-wont Jacks father be joining us?
Ross: Hey, whats this?!
Rachel: Whats this?
Chandler: (entering) Hey, my Fathers house does that!
[Scene: Rachels office, Joannas telling Rachel, her side of the story.]
Rachel: Youre right. Youre right. I mean Im about to have a baby, I can tell my mother that I dont want her to just be sleeping on my couch! Oh my God! Shes gonna want to sleep in my bed with me. This cannot happen!
Chandler: So um, Mary-Angela, whats your second favorite?
Phoebe: Yeah. (Looks.) Oh, thats gone too. This is Monicas bathroom right?!
Joey: And a 50. (The salesman stops suddenly) Huh, these must be Chandlers pants.
Monica: Youre kidding?! Thats great!
Chandler: Thats what you say at the end of a date.
[Scene: Rachels office.]
Phoebe: Oh, the Angelica!! Go! Go! (She bangs on the cabs roof and it pulls away.) (To Ross) You didnt get the annulment?!!
Joey: Aww, man. Thats the girl I was hiding from. When she finds out hes my roommate, shes gonna tell him what I did.
Rachel: Thats fine!
Ross: Oh, fire! There, theres a fire! Fire!!
Joey: Oh yeah, and shes really nice too! She taught me about yknow, how to work with the cameras and smell-the-fart acting.
(They move on the couch and start kissing again. Joey does his grazing on Rachel’s thigh and she slaps his hand)
Ross and Chandler: Its my joke.
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, Monica is waiting for Tim who enters.]
Chandler: Oh my God! Whos gonna watch that?!
Jennifer: Lisas laugh though TheresIts so infectious. Its one of those things just forget about it. Once it starts, its all gone.
(She slaps Rachels side and Rachel screams in pain.)
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachels, Monica has finally given up on her search to find what the light switch does and is now flicking it on and off aimlessly.]
Monica: Thats Bill Clinton.
Monica: Okay. Heres the thing.
Joey: Maybe, my rulers wrong.
Pete: Wait, wait, wait, wait, thats-thats what youre worried about? If thats the problem, weve got no problem.
Joey: Whats not to like? Custard? Good. Jam? Good. Meat? Goooooood.
Joey: Hows she doing?
Joey: Well yeah, dont-dont you think its a she?
Joey: Thats not a bad idea. Yeah. Okay, but if I got to turn on the charm tomorrow Im not wasting anymore of it over here with you guys. (Starts to leave, but stops and turns to Phoebe.) Well, actually I got a little bit saved for you Pheebs. (Exits.)
Phoebe: Oh, hi, Mrs. Waltham. I need to speak with ether one of the best men, or Rosss sister Monica.
Phoebe: Listen, Roberts gonna be here any second so, will one of you just tell him?
Joey: Thats not what I said. Okay, I just meant...
Rachel: Chandler, thats not enough. I mean what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents, and a bunch of little presents? And youve just gotten her one great present? I mean thats just gonna make her feel bad. Why would you do that to her Chandler? Why? Why?
Joanna: Just a little gag gift somebody gave me. (Shes holding a pair of handcuffs) Put your hands together.
Joey: Correct! Theres a possible backwards bonus!
Parker: Dahaaa! (Punches Chandler in the arm and he makes a face of pain.) Im going to find the mens room, be right back.
Joey: Its the chick! Shes going through some changes.
Monica: Hes not boring! Hes just-hes just low key.
(Yep, its a little gold loop.)
Chandler: (frustrated) Okay, for the last time. Its not named for each individual man.
Mark: Um, y'know, before we go ah, theres something I need to say.
Phoebe: Dont be so corny Ross, its not an after-school special. (She rides off and the camera pans down to reveal two shiny, silver training wheels firmly attached.)
Joey: Hey! (starts to laugh.) Hows it going?
Dr. Green: Ross? Whats with the neck?
Monica: Oh my God! Oh my God that’s awful! What did you think of the house?
[cut to inside Monica and Rachels]
Joey: Yeah, whats that about?
Joey: Uhhh, yeah. Yeah. But uh, I dont think its the kind youre gonna like.
Mr. Thompson: And finally, our biggest item of the night, the 22-foot gentlemans day sailer sailboat. The winning bid was a whooping $20,000! (Joey suddenly gets excited.)
Ross: Uh, so this play umm, what do you think? Its-its gotten great reviews! Yknow the uh
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Itssince youve never done it before you can be Monicas made of honor.
Joey: Yeah, just a crush! Thats all this is! Its a crush! Im Joey; I dont get deep feelings.
Joey: You bet! Whats the part?
[Scene: Monicas, Chandler and Monica are still hugging each other.]
Monica: Theres our star!
[Scene: Chandlers office, he is trying to find Rachel a date.]
Chandler: So thats the girl you like.
(Onstage theres a knock on the door and Kathy opens it. We dont see whats going on, only hear it.)
Monica: Really? Whos number two?
Monica: Hey, the mans dog just died.
Chandler: Y'know what, hes right. Theres something like uh, ammonia in that, that like kills the pain.
Mr. Geller: So its just your mother then.
Ross: (to the girls) Chandler was how old when he first touched a girl’s breast?
Ross: Okay, its coffee.
Ross: Its-its hot
Rachel: No! Theres no orange juice in there! We win!!
Ken: That�s right. Is it true, that the reason you are here in Tulsa is that you fell asleep in a meeting and took the job without realizing what you were saying yes to?
Monica: Oh, its so beautiful. Ohh! Yknow, I-I dont know if I feel right about this.
Phoebe: Youre the cook! With out you its just me driving up to peoples houses with empty trays and asking for money!
Ross: No, but its-its-its hot!
(Helens buzzer is heard on the intercom, so Chandler presses his button, too.)
Monica: Phoebe, its been two days.
Phoebe: Oh! Since tomorrow. I met this really cute guy in the park and he like y'know, jogs, and blades, and swims, and so y'know we made a deal thats hes going to teach me all sorts of jock stuff.
Joanna: Oh yes, well theres the coffee too. (to the committee) Rachel can carry two things at once!
Chandler: Oh-oh, oh, oh-oh! (Whispers something in Joeys ear.)
Joey: Yknow what? I think thats enough for now. Yeah. I dont want to be over rehearsed.
Ross: Oh, no, no, no, I will! I just want to butter her up, first! You know, Im going to take her to an amazing Valentines dinner. Do all this romantic stuff, and then, just when she thinks Im the best boyfriend in the world, then Im going to tell her that my pregnant ex-girlfriend is living with me.
Rachel: Ross! Phoebes gonna be here any second, she cannot see this!