words in movies
Phoebe: Sure. Yeah, hes kinda sexy.
Phoebe: Okay so, well just come up with some kind of signal if its going well you can take off.
Rachel: Cause I know hes gonna flip out and I hate it when hes angry.
Phoebe: Oh my God!!! Monica!! Hes the stripper from your bachelorette party!!
Joey: Its a grand tradition!
Dr. Green: Its chicken.
Dr. Green: 74?! I ordered the 75! Thats a magnificent wine! The 74 is sewage! Why would you bring me sewage?! (The waiters dumbfounded) Is that a hard question? Are you an idiot? Is that why youre a waiter?
Phoebe: Hes right though, the 74 is absolute piss.
Rachel: No its okay, this is whats gonna happen. Im gonna wait a couple years and then the baby will tell him.
Rachel: Hey, that is the babys problem. (Dr. Green returns.) Oh, everything okay with the waiter?
Dr. Green: Whats TiVo?
Phoebe: Its slang for pregnant.
Dr. Green: Who is the father? Oh no! Please dont tell me its her! (Points at Phoebe.)
Rachel: No, its Ross. Its Ross. You like Ross. (He just shakes his head.) Oh daddy, I hope youre okay with all of this. I mean think about it, this is a good thing. Youre gonnaThis is your first grandchild! Youre gonna be a poppy!
Dr. Green: Thats true.
Dr. Green: The wedding! Theres going to be a wedding. Young lady, dont you sit there and tell me my first grandchild is going to be a bastard! (Rachel pauses) Rachel Karen Green, tell me there is gonna be a wedding!!
Joey: So uh, you and Mona, been a while now. Hows it going?
Ross: Ah, its good. Its going good. I mean, we get along great. Shes, shes so
Chandler: Shes okay with Rachel and the baby?
Chandler: Honey! Thats crazy! I dont want you to get me a stripper
Chandler: Look, I appreciate it, but uh, its a little creepy. Yknow? Im not a bachelor anymore.
Phoebe: Its Lafite. The 74 Latour is actually drinking quite nicely.
Rachel: Theres not gonna be a wedding. Ross and I are not getting married.
Dr. Green: Stay calm?!! How do you expect me to stay calm?! This is unacceptable Rachel! And I wanna know why?!! Is it because that punk Ross wont marry you?! Thats it! Is that it?!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandlers bachelor party has begun, what there is of it, with only Joey (wearing a gold paper top hat) and Chandler (wearing what appears to be a Burger King paper crown) enjoying a nice product placement of Budweisers on ice.]
Joey: Look, look lets pretend its a real bachelor party. Okay? Yknow? Before your wedding. Come on, itll be fun.
Chandler: Okay. I cant believe tomorrows the big day.
(Theres a knock on the door.)
Joey: Thats her! Okay, come on! (They go over and open the door.)
Joey: Uh, that-thats-thats me!
Chandler: Thats me.
Chandler: So shes a
Joey: Yeah, thats one naked hooker!
Ross: Uh thats an eighteenth century Indian artifact from Calcutta.
Ross: Aw forget it, its from Pier One. (Theres an angry knock on the door.) Sorry. (Goes and opens the door to an irate Dr. Green.)
Dr. Green: Oh? Really? Thats what my daughter means to you? Nothing?
Dr. Green: Oh really? Thats how treat a friend? You get her in trouble and then refuse to marry her?
Joey: Wait! Wait! Maybe shes a hooker and a stripper, but she got confused about what shes supposed to do.
Hooker: Uh, no. But I could pretend to strip, but thats gonna cost extra. Okay, heres the extras, handcuffs, spanking (Chandler grunts for her not to continue and Joey pulls him back into the kitchen.)
Joey: Maybe Monicas playing a joke on ya. Yknow? Getting her own husband a hooker, thats pretty funny.
Ross: Hey! I did not dump Rachel! (To Mona) Nor are we still together. (The phone rings and Ross goes to answer it, only hes trapped behind the apothecary table by Dr. Green.) Can I just (Dr. Green glares at him.) Why dont we just let the machine get that?
Joey: (on machine) Hey Ross. Its Joey. Theres a hooker over here and we thought maybe youd know something about it.
[Scene: Monicas Restaurants Kitchen, shes cooking as one of her waiters, Stu, comes over to talk to her.]
Stu: So, tonights the night of the big bachelor party?
Monica: Yeah! Hey! Thanks for getting me that girls number.
Stu: No problem. So whos the party for?
Monica: Shes a stripper.
Stu: No, shes a hooker.
Monica: Oh my God Stu! I-I cant believe you did this! Now are you absolutely sure shes a hooker?
Stu: Either that or shes just the best, most expensive date I ever had.
Hooker: Whats taking you boys so long?
Chandler: (To Joey) In a minute? Whats gonna happen in a minute?!
Joey: Hey! Its your bachelor party.
Joey: Not like we used to. Remember? You and me used to be inseparable. Yknow now its like things are different.
Monica: (entering quickly) Shes a hooker! Shes a hooker! Shes a (Stops as she sees her.) Hi! Uh, we spoke on the phone. (Goes and shakes the hookers hand.)
Ross: So your dad dropped by. Hes a pleasant man!
Ross: I dont care about your dad! I care about Mona! She was there and now shes totally freaked out!
Rachel: Oh okay, Ill fix that to. Whats her e-mail address?
Phoebe: Thats it?! You call that a fight? Come on! "We were on a break!" "No we werent!" What happened to you two?!
Ross: Because whats going on with Rachel has nothing to do with how I feel about you.
Ross: I know and I was going to, but I thought it was better that you heard it from Rachels father. Look I I made a mistake, but its only because I really, really like you. Really!
Rachel: (entering) Forgot my purse! (Sees them kissing.) Oh, you guys made up. (To Mona) Hes a good kisser isnt he? (Ross goes to close the door on her.) Im going! (Quickly leaves and Ross locks the door.)
Chandler: Her ass print is still on your grandmothers quilt, do you really want to talk about smoking?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is being yelled at by her dad over the phone, and hes been going on for so long Rachel is holding the phone away from her ear and reading a book.]
Dr. Green: (on phone, not hearing her) theres gonna be a wedding! (Joey enters from his room and goes to get a beer from the fridge.) Thats unacceptable Rachel! What the hell does love have to do with it anyway?! There are more important things in a marriage other than love! (Joey hears something and looks around for the source.) constantly thinking about things! You have to think about the consequences of your decision. (Joey finds that the sound is coming from the phone and puts it to his ear.)
Monica: Heres the plan! Okay? Im going to leave you get a look at Brendas bra!
Chandler: Ah, I fooled around with Joeys sister. (Phoebe gasps) Well, thats not the worst part.
Chandler: Look, Im sorry! But theres nothing I can do, I think Im in love with her!
Rachel: Well, it doesnt sound like it! I mean, its pretty easy not to kiss someone, you just dont kiss them! See look at us, right now, not kissing!
Rachel: I know you did! I bought the same one! And if she sees your table shes gonna know that I lied to her. I told her ours was an original.
[Scene: Petes apartment, Pete and Monica are coming back from a date.]
Monica: No, its not a sign! Its a very old key!
Ross: I know, it�s the first time, we�re leaving the baby and � hey, I know how hard it is for you, but � but Emma is gonna be fine. My mom is gonna be with her. She�s great with kids.
Joey: Aaron! You gotta let me go. The guys hammered!
Phoebe: Okay, dont panic. Im gonna go to the store, Im gonna get you another set of nails, no ones gonna know, and youre gonna look great. (She runs over to get her coat.) Oh! Oh, its cause theyre gonna eatthats the problem.
Jill: Its probably because not mature enough. Or smart enough. Maybe he doesnt like the way I dressNo that cant be it. Its really gotta be the smart thing. Oh Im so stupid! Im just like this incredibly pretty stupid girl!
Phoebe: Whos the father?!
Emily: Oh, no-no, yknow I absolutely adore Rachel its just that, well it might be a awkward for you. But its absolutely your decision. (Gets up.) More tea?
Ross: Yeah, all right, its a date. (He leaves)
Monica: Well, theres a lot to think about. I mean, how is she, how is she going to handle this financially? How is she going to juggle work? Does she realize shes not going to have a date again for the next eighteen years?
Chandler: Okay, well he totally screwed up the punch line. Y'know, its supposed to be arrghh-eh og-errigh.
Monica: Okay, can we change the topic? Because its really doing nothing for me.
(Susan just glares back, as Rosss inappropriate joke falls flat. Meanwhile, a bubble is about to burst...)
Joey: No reason, Im just saying that uh Thats where Ill be.
Rachel: Dont say that I have no sentiment! (Starts to show Ross whats in the box.) This is a movie stub from our first date! This is an eggshell from the first time you made me breakfast in bed! (Holds up a bone) This is from the museum from the first time we were together. Okay, maybe I exchange gifts sometimes, but I keep the things that matter!
Monica: Wow! Its like Rachel in High School.
Rachel: Ohh, its gonna be so great! Im gonna get to help decide what we sell, Im gonna have an office with walls and everything. (turns to Monica) Im gonna have walls!
[Scene: Chandlers office, he is just finishing a meeting with his boss.]
Cecilia: Oh yeah-yeah, we should get the (Pause) So when Jessica kisses a man, she usually puts umm, both her hands on the mans face. (She does so.)
Ross: No! I talked to Joey on the set, he hasnt heard from him. I-I-I talked to Chandlers parents again!
Chandler: Thats great, but shouldnt you be on the toilet right now?
Chandler: Okay. Then I guess its just, wait here then. (Hands her the sign that says, Wait Here.") (To the ticket agent) Hi. I need one fake ticket to Yemen.
Monica: Wow. Yknow it is so weird. I mean, youre gonna tell this guy today and he has no idea whats gonna happen.
Phoebe: Wait, am I missing something though? Cause I thought death was something thats supposed to be sad, in a way.
Joey: (To Chandler) (laughing) Funny one! Thats good!
Monica: Thats right. (A noise comes from the living room.) Did you hear something?
Ross: Yes. I mean, its what we always planned. And if you have a plan, you should stick to it. Thats why they call them plans. Hello? (Pause) Im fine.
Rachel: Ohh, theres a picture of her in the yearbook actually.
Phoebe: I KNOW THAT!!! You have to stop her!! Shes going to ruin the wedding!!
Rachel: Hi! Hey, Happy Valentines Day!
Monica: I also, did a little something in fur. But umm, thats really just for me. (Rubs it against her cheek.) Okay. So, why dont you go into your room and try these on and well seeget a better idea of whats gonna work.
Kathy: Why not? Whats going on?
Phoebe: Do you think thats something that hed be mad at you for?
Ross: Listen, Im ah, Im sorry Ive been so crazy and jealous and, its just that I like you a lot, so...
Richard: The bedroom. Well its pretty much your typical... (opens the door as Monica hides under the covers, and quickly closes the door before his date can see the room.) bedroom.
[Scene: Rachels office, Phoebe hands Rachel a key card.]
Ross: (notices the table) HeyOoh! Whats-whats that, dinner stuff? You making dinner?
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, its the one with the fake chocolate. Monica has baked some cookies and Phoebe is trying them.]
Alice: Phoebes right Frank. I know its hard to hear, but it wouldve been wrong to go through with it. I-I-I was being selfish, even though we, we want the same things now, in the future we may not. (to Phoebe) Is that it, is that what it is?
Rachel: Of course its true and it hurts so bad.
Chandler: Well he doesnt have to know! Its not like we run in the same circles. I hang out with you guys, and he stars in a drag show in Vegas.
Joey: Thats not fair! I cant do that.
Chandler: Roberts coming out.
Chandler: Yes, yes, its just that we ah, we kinda all ready, made plans with Ross.
Tag: Well, its not out here. Is there any chance it could be in your office?
[Scene: Joshuas parents apartment, continued from earlier.]
Monica: Oh no, shes still at work, but she told me to tell you to call her.
[Scene: Treegers apartment, Joey knocks and Mr. Treeger opens the door.]
(Rachel turns and looks at the group on the couch and they move over. Chandler measures the room theyve made with his arm and decides its not enough and they all move over again.)
Rachel: Okay. Okay honey, hes fine, hes fine, lets just put him down. Come here, Ben. (sets him on the couch) See thats a good boy. (to Monica) How could you do that to him!! Ross trusted me, what is he going to say?!
Chandler: Oh, thats uh, thats pretty nice but Im gonna go with the one I picked first.
Ross: Thats the day youre gonna die? Seedarnit, Ive got shuffleboard that day.
Joey: Right, and you go with Rachel, Bonnies free tonight?
Chandler: Thats awesome! Thats great! What made you do it?!
Phoebe: Yeah! Its not like it spits out a Clark bar after every game.
Ross: All right here. Watch me execute the three Ps of championship play. Power. (swings the racquet) Precision. (swings the racquet.) and penache. (does a backswing and hits Sarah whos started up the stairs, knocking her down, they both watch in horror.)
Phoebe: Okay, I guess. I mean I dont know, its just, I guess I know its going to be over soon.
Phoebe: (seeing him) Okay, nows not the time Joey. All right? You can yell at me tomorrow.
Ross: Oh no! That-thatll just bring me down! This was great! I mean I-I-I was great! This is a great day! Yknow what? Im buying everyone coffee. All right? If someone would just grab my wallet, its in my pocket.
Joey: Well, its complicated. Shes with this other guy. For a long time. Someone from work, too. And I could never do that to the guy, because were really good friends.
Eric: I dont think they have a name for it. Its just I get nervous; I start sweating like crazy.
Phoebe: Okay, okay. Its James Brolin. James Brolin is the father of my baby.
Rachel: Yeah, but its okay, because when Ross left Mark came over.
Rachel: But ah, youre safe from it if its in the freezer?
Ross: (disappointed) Thats cool.
Chandler: (whispering in Joeys ear) The reason he just said.
Ross: How weird is that? Yknow? Youre moving in with me and have the one thing I dont have. Its like uh, in a way you-you complete me (Phoebe glares at him) kitchen.
Rachel: Well, someone was supposed to write "Rach, take down the lights" and put it on the re... frigerate... (finally noticing Monicas note stuck to the refrigerator) How long has that been there?
Ross: Yknow what? Maybe, Mrs. Green, its not absolutely vital that you live with us.
Chandler: Yeah, hes made phone calls, written letters, he even came to New York, but I always said I was too busy to see him. Yknow its all very Cats in the CradleI dont want to get into it. (The show starts.) Here we go.
Rachel: Oh please, I hate packing, its closer to work, and we do have fun. Although, Im really gonna miss living with you.
Phoebe: No!! wait, wait, wait!! Oh please, hold it up so I can listen. (Joey looks at Ross and holds the phone above Rosss shoulder.)
Rachel: I thought this might happen today. Ross, I know the holidays can be rough. Yknow? And its probably really hard for you to be alone right now.
Rachel: Oh, and somebody can get those leather pants shes always wanted!
Monica: You may be okay about getting hurt, but I am not okay with being the one who hurts you. Thats why I cant take this job.
Joey: Theres the waitress. Excuse me, Miss. Hello, Miss?
Ross: Look, its just did, did you ever go to a party and think, "Would really anyone miss me if I werent here?"
Pete: Okay, yeah. I mean... If thats, if thats really what you want, okay.
[cut to Joey as Estelle, Joeys agent, approaches]
Monica: Alright, you know what? Thats it. Youve had your chance.
Joey: Wow Dennis Phillips! Thats great! How did you guys meet?
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers bathroom, the scene is continued from earlier.]
Monica: (hangs up) I dont think this numbers right!
Emily: Oh, but the partys only just getting started!
Rachel: I know. (Starts to cry) Yeah, see, theres so much to do and I have so little time to do it in.
Ross: Sweetie, calm down, its gonna be okay.
Phoebe: No, its just that he got this new like home theater dealie, and he wants y'know, us to check it out.
Joey: Well, its not a part, no. Im teaching acting for soap operas down at the Learning Extension.
Monica: Rach, hes a friend of ours.
Joey: It was so stupid, I said some stuff in an interview that I shouldnt have said. But believe me, thats not gonna happen today.
Joeys Head: Okay, it all comes down to this. Whatever happens, happens. Destiny.
Phoebe: Yeah, um, I cant fly. Im having my brothers babies.
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, no, I dont, I dont know. But, y'know what, maybe its just all for the best?
Ross: Well, yeah, kinda. Um, but thats okay, see we have an understanding, um, see we each have this list of five famous people, (gets his out) so Im allowed to sleep with you. No, no, no, its flattery.
Ross: (answering the phone) Hello? (Listens) Hey Mon, hows the packing going? (Listens) Ben? Hes fine. Yeah, hes rightOh my God! (He looks over at the fake Ben and notices that the head has fallen off.) Get your head of your shirt there son! (He tries to push the pumpkin through the neck hole.) What? (Listens) Yeah, its a pumpkin. Ill come pack.