words in movies
Phoebe: Sure. Yeah, hes kinda sexy.
Phoebe: Okay so, well just come up with some kind of signal if its going well you can take off.
Rachel: Cause I know hes gonna flip out and I hate it when hes angry.
Phoebe: Oh my God!!! Monica!! Hes the stripper from your bachelorette party!!
Joey: Its a grand tradition!
Dr. Green: Its chicken.
Dr. Green: 74?! I ordered the 75! Thats a magnificent wine! The 74 is sewage! Why would you bring me sewage?! (The waiters dumbfounded) Is that a hard question? Are you an idiot? Is that why youre a waiter?
Phoebe: Hes right though, the 74 is absolute piss.
Rachel: No its okay, this is whats gonna happen. Im gonna wait a couple years and then the baby will tell him.
Rachel: Hey, that is the babys problem. (Dr. Green returns.) Oh, everything okay with the waiter?
Dr. Green: Whats TiVo?
Phoebe: Its slang for pregnant.
Dr. Green: Who is the father? Oh no! Please dont tell me its her! (Points at Phoebe.)
Rachel: No, its Ross. Its Ross. You like Ross. (He just shakes his head.) Oh daddy, I hope youre okay with all of this. I mean think about it, this is a good thing. Youre gonnaThis is your first grandchild! Youre gonna be a poppy!
Dr. Green: Thats true.
Dr. Green: The wedding! Theres going to be a wedding. Young lady, dont you sit there and tell me my first grandchild is going to be a bastard! (Rachel pauses) Rachel Karen Green, tell me there is gonna be a wedding!!
Joey: So uh, you and Mona, been a while now. Hows it going?
Ross: Ah, its good. Its going good. I mean, we get along great. Shes, shes so
Chandler: Shes okay with Rachel and the baby?
Chandler: Honey! Thats crazy! I dont want you to get me a stripper
Chandler: Look, I appreciate it, but uh, its a little creepy. Yknow? Im not a bachelor anymore.
Phoebe: Its Lafite. The 74 Latour is actually drinking quite nicely.
Rachel: Theres not gonna be a wedding. Ross and I are not getting married.
Dr. Green: Stay calm?!! How do you expect me to stay calm?! This is unacceptable Rachel! And I wanna know why?!! Is it because that punk Ross wont marry you?! Thats it! Is that it?!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandlers bachelor party has begun, what there is of it, with only Joey (wearing a gold paper top hat) and Chandler (wearing what appears to be a Burger King paper crown) enjoying a nice product placement of Budweisers on ice.]
Joey: Look, look lets pretend its a real bachelor party. Okay? Yknow? Before your wedding. Come on, itll be fun.
Chandler: Okay. I cant believe tomorrows the big day.
(Theres a knock on the door.)
Joey: Thats her! Okay, come on! (They go over and open the door.)
Joey: Uh, that-thats-thats me!
Chandler: Thats me.
Chandler: So shes a
Joey: Yeah, thats one naked hooker!
Ross: Uh thats an eighteenth century Indian artifact from Calcutta.
Ross: Aw forget it, its from Pier One. (Theres an angry knock on the door.) Sorry. (Goes and opens the door to an irate Dr. Green.)
Dr. Green: Oh? Really? Thats what my daughter means to you? Nothing?
Dr. Green: Oh really? Thats how treat a friend? You get her in trouble and then refuse to marry her?
Joey: Wait! Wait! Maybe shes a hooker and a stripper, but she got confused about what shes supposed to do.
Hooker: Uh, no. But I could pretend to strip, but thats gonna cost extra. Okay, heres the extras, handcuffs, spanking (Chandler grunts for her not to continue and Joey pulls him back into the kitchen.)
Joey: Maybe Monicas playing a joke on ya. Yknow? Getting her own husband a hooker, thats pretty funny.
Ross: Hey! I did not dump Rachel! (To Mona) Nor are we still together. (The phone rings and Ross goes to answer it, only hes trapped behind the apothecary table by Dr. Green.) Can I just (Dr. Green glares at him.) Why dont we just let the machine get that?
Joey: (on machine) Hey Ross. Its Joey. Theres a hooker over here and we thought maybe youd know something about it.
[Scene: Monicas Restaurants Kitchen, shes cooking as one of her waiters, Stu, comes over to talk to her.]
Stu: So, tonights the night of the big bachelor party?
Monica: Yeah! Hey! Thanks for getting me that girls number.
Stu: No problem. So whos the party for?
Monica: Shes a stripper.
Stu: No, shes a hooker.
Monica: Oh my God Stu! I-I cant believe you did this! Now are you absolutely sure shes a hooker?
Stu: Either that or shes just the best, most expensive date I ever had.
Hooker: Whats taking you boys so long?
Chandler: (To Joey) In a minute? Whats gonna happen in a minute?!
Joey: Hey! Its your bachelor party.
Joey: Not like we used to. Remember? You and me used to be inseparable. Yknow now its like things are different.
Monica: (entering quickly) Shes a hooker! Shes a hooker! Shes a (Stops as she sees her.) Hi! Uh, we spoke on the phone. (Goes and shakes the hookers hand.)
Ross: So your dad dropped by. Hes a pleasant man!
Ross: I dont care about your dad! I care about Mona! She was there and now shes totally freaked out!
Rachel: Oh okay, Ill fix that to. Whats her e-mail address?
Phoebe: Thats it?! You call that a fight? Come on! "We were on a break!" "No we werent!" What happened to you two?!
Ross: Because whats going on with Rachel has nothing to do with how I feel about you.
Ross: I know and I was going to, but I thought it was better that you heard it from Rachels father. Look I I made a mistake, but its only because I really, really like you. Really!
Rachel: (entering) Forgot my purse! (Sees them kissing.) Oh, you guys made up. (To Mona) Hes a good kisser isnt he? (Ross goes to close the door on her.) Im going! (Quickly leaves and Ross locks the door.)
Chandler: Her ass print is still on your grandmothers quilt, do you really want to talk about smoking?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is being yelled at by her dad over the phone, and hes been going on for so long Rachel is holding the phone away from her ear and reading a book.]
Dr. Green: (on phone, not hearing her) theres gonna be a wedding! (Joey enters from his room and goes to get a beer from the fridge.) Thats unacceptable Rachel! What the hell does love have to do with it anyway?! There are more important things in a marriage other than love! (Joey hears something and looks around for the source.) constantly thinking about things! You have to think about the consequences of your decision. (Joey finds that the sound is coming from the phone and puts it to his ear.)
Tag: Well, its not out here. Is there any chance it could be in your office?
[Scene: Joshuas parents apartment, continued from earlier.]
Monica: Oh no, shes still at work, but she told me to tell you to call her.
[Scene: Treegers apartment, Joey knocks and Mr. Treeger opens the door.]
(Rachel turns and looks at the group on the couch and they move over. Chandler measures the room theyve made with his arm and decides its not enough and they all move over again.)
Rachel: Okay. Okay honey, hes fine, hes fine, lets just put him down. Come here, Ben. (sets him on the couch) See thats a good boy. (to Monica) How could you do that to him!! Ross trusted me, what is he going to say?!
Chandler: Oh, thats uh, thats pretty nice but Im gonna go with the one I picked first.
Ross: Thats the day youre gonna die? Seedarnit, Ive got shuffleboard that day.
Joey: Right, and you go with Rachel, Bonnies free tonight?
Chandler: Thats awesome! Thats great! What made you do it?!
Phoebe: Yeah! Its not like it spits out a Clark bar after every game.
Ross: All right here. Watch me execute the three Ps of championship play. Power. (swings the racquet) Precision. (swings the racquet.) and penache. (does a backswing and hits Sarah whos started up the stairs, knocking her down, they both watch in horror.)
Phoebe: Okay, I guess. I mean I dont know, its just, I guess I know its going to be over soon.
Phoebe: (seeing him) Okay, nows not the time Joey. All right? You can yell at me tomorrow.
Ross: Oh no! That-thatll just bring me down! This was great! I mean I-I-I was great! This is a great day! Yknow what? Im buying everyone coffee. All right? If someone would just grab my wallet, its in my pocket.
Joey: Well, its complicated. Shes with this other guy. For a long time. Someone from work, too. And I could never do that to the guy, because were really good friends.
Eric: I dont think they have a name for it. Its just I get nervous; I start sweating like crazy.
Phoebe: Okay, okay. Its James Brolin. James Brolin is the father of my baby.
Rachel: Yeah, but its okay, because when Ross left Mark came over.
Rachel: But ah, youre safe from it if its in the freezer?
Ross: (disappointed) Thats cool.
Chandler: (whispering in Joeys ear) The reason he just said.
Ross: How weird is that? Yknow? Youre moving in with me and have the one thing I dont have. Its like uh, in a way you-you complete me (Phoebe glares at him) kitchen.
Rachel: Well, someone was supposed to write "Rach, take down the lights" and put it on the re... frigerate... (finally noticing Monicas note stuck to the refrigerator) How long has that been there?
Ross: Yknow what? Maybe, Mrs. Green, its not absolutely vital that you live with us.
Chandler: Yeah, hes made phone calls, written letters, he even came to New York, but I always said I was too busy to see him. Yknow its all very Cats in the CradleI dont want to get into it. (The show starts.) Here we go.
Rachel: Oh please, I hate packing, its closer to work, and we do have fun. Although, Im really gonna miss living with you.
Phoebe: No!! wait, wait, wait!! Oh please, hold it up so I can listen. (Joey looks at Ross and holds the phone above Rosss shoulder.)
Rachel: I thought this might happen today. Ross, I know the holidays can be rough. Yknow? And its probably really hard for you to be alone right now.
Rachel: Oh, and somebody can get those leather pants shes always wanted!
Monica: You may be okay about getting hurt, but I am not okay with being the one who hurts you. Thats why I cant take this job.
Joey: Theres the waitress. Excuse me, Miss. Hello, Miss?
Ross: Look, its just did, did you ever go to a party and think, "Would really anyone miss me if I werent here?"
Pete: Okay, yeah. I mean... If thats, if thats really what you want, okay.
[cut to Joey as Estelle, Joeys agent, approaches]
Monica: Alright, you know what? Thats it. Youve had your chance.
Joey: Wow Dennis Phillips! Thats great! How did you guys meet?
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers bathroom, the scene is continued from earlier.]
Monica: (hangs up) I dont think this numbers right!
Emily: Oh, but the partys only just getting started!
Rachel: I know. (Starts to cry) Yeah, see, theres so much to do and I have so little time to do it in.
Ross: Sweetie, calm down, its gonna be okay.
Phoebe: No, its just that he got this new like home theater dealie, and he wants y'know, us to check it out.
Joey: Well, its not a part, no. Im teaching acting for soap operas down at the Learning Extension.
Monica: Rach, hes a friend of ours.
Joey: It was so stupid, I said some stuff in an interview that I shouldnt have said. But believe me, thats not gonna happen today.
Joeys Head: Okay, it all comes down to this. Whatever happens, happens. Destiny.
Phoebe: Yeah, um, I cant fly. Im having my brothers babies.
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, no, I dont, I dont know. But, y'know what, maybe its just all for the best?
Ross: Well, yeah, kinda. Um, but thats okay, see we have an understanding, um, see we each have this list of five famous people, (gets his out) so Im allowed to sleep with you. No, no, no, its flattery.
Ross: (answering the phone) Hello? (Listens) Hey Mon, hows the packing going? (Listens) Ben? Hes fine. Yeah, hes rightOh my God! (He looks over at the fake Ben and notices that the head has fallen off.) Get your head of your shirt there son! (He tries to push the pumpkin through the neck hole.) What? (Listens) Yeah, its a pumpkin. Ill come pack.
[Cut to Central Perk, Ross is taking Ben to visit Rachel whos working there.]
Joey: What theyre not invited?! Oh no, thats terrible! Theyre gonna be crushed!
Phoebe: Ooh! How was Kathys play?
Monica: Lets go big bunny!
Chandler: (angrily) I dont think thats what they were talking about Joe!!
Eric: Hi, Im Eric, Im gonna be Chandlers new roommate.
Monica: Pulling what? Its second down.
Waiter: It�s just that we do have some large parties waiting.
C.H.E.E.S.E: You can say that again Mac.
Phoebe: Thats so funny to think if youd just done that right after the last contest, no one would have had to move at all.
Rachel: Oh honey, dont worry. I really do feel like tomorrows the day.
Monica: Wow! Thats great! Dad must really like you, he doesnt ask just anyone to play.
Ross: I meanno, its just cause, its just cause you and I were like a nightmare. (Screams.) No, but there was some good times.
Phoebe: Isnt it funny how we kept running into each other? Its as if someone really wants us to be together.
(Joeys cell phone rings and he answers it.)
Phoebe: Look everyone, its the spirit of Thanksgiving!
[Scene: Rosss Building, they are approaching the apartment of the woman who died. Ross knocks on the door and a woman answers it.]
Ross: I dropped him off at Carols. (To Phoebe) Anyway, it turns out that Im not going to be able to get those tickets though.
Monica: Okay, look at this one. This is my favourite. (Its a little pink and white dress for the girl baby.)
Rachel: Ooh, Phoebes here! Okay, lets turn out all the lights and well just watch the movie!
Chandler: Come on Monica, its our Valentines Day. Please? Please-please, please?
Rachel: Yeah, I cant live with Joey once the baby comes. I dont want my childs first words to be, (in a babys voice) "How you doin?"
[Scene: Elizabeths apartment, she is packing for her trip as Ross watches.]
Ross: (showing them the page) Here, check it out. Its the first one, too.
Phoebe: I dunno, lets see! So, okay, I dreamt that we were gonna get married, and he left, becuz he had to go fight a fire. And, um, so okay, I went to a night club, and I saw him making out with a girl.
Phoebe: No! No! Its just that he gave me three tickets and there are six of us!
[Scene: Joey and Rachels, Joey is sitting behind a red drum set.]
Phoebe: Ewww! And "Oh no!" Itsthey just want me to be the surrogate. Its her-its her egg and her sperm, and Im-Im just the oven, its totally their bun.
Monica: Oh! (Gets up) Lets see, well if this is the wedding hall then umm (Walks away) youre parents will be at home in Queens.
Phoebe: All right, well I just wanted to say thank you though for diverting Kyles ex.
Rachel: But you did! I mean, lets be honest.
Monica: No, its okay, not only did I get to go out with Chip Matthews, I got to dump Chip Matthews.
Chandler: Okay, so weve established my name, and hit me. But theoretically y'know, I mean say we werent friends, say its a blind date. I show up at your door, and Im like (in a fake voice) Hey, nice to meet, ya. Hey, oh-hey.
Chandler: Well its kinda hard to be friends with Drake because of his busy schedule and the fact that hes not real.
Mrs. Geller: (entering) Hows the hired help?
Rachel: Hes downstairs getting the rest of the stuff out of the cab.
Monica: I dont see him. Hey! Maybe hes in the sugar bowl! (Opens the sugar bowl) Joey? Nope! (Closes the sugar bowl and they both laugh.)
Phoebe: Wow! Oh you can just imagine that this is where (Shes opening and closing the drawers) they kept all the stuff to make their potions.
Phoebe: Okay, so its probably just the Ross thing then.
Joey: Because, Monica, the guys so good, and I really, really want this part.
Cecilia: (walking up) Youre absolutely right they are writing me out of the show. They dont know exactly when its going to happen, but apparently going to be very soon and thats it.
Monica: Joey, please dont do that. I think its best that we just forget about it.
Monica: Well, Ive tried everything. I give up. I guess Im not gonna be the mom who makes the worlds best chocolate cookies. I do make the best duck confit with broccoli rabe. Kids love that right.
[Scene: Ross and Emilys room, the next morning. Ross is now asleep and has his head in Monicas lap and his feet on Chandlers lap. Monica and Chandler are both still awake and depressed.]
Mrs. Geller: Oh thats all right, Im coming back later with your father.
Susan: I know its frightening, but, big picture. The birth part is just one day, and when its over, were all gonna be parents for the rest of our lives.
Mary-Theresa: Its no big deal. Chandler was just kissin me because he thought I was Mary-Angela.
Joey: Yeah, theres this guy from Chicago whos supposed to be the next Martin Scorcese, all right? But then this guys right after him. (Joeys cell phone rings and he answers it.) Hello!
Phoebe: Okay. (singing) Jingle bitch screwed me over! Go to hell jingle whore! Go to hell Go to hell. Go to hell-hell-hell. Thats all I have so far.