words in movies
{Transcribers note: This is where the opening credits are, but theyre not the usual opening credits. Oh no! These credits are based on the world that would have been created had all of the above actually happened. It starts out with all of them at the fountain sitting on the couch as Fat Monica runs up and sits on the arm of the couch, tilting the whole thing towards her. It then goes on to show Rachels still a shop-aholic and with Barry. Fat Monica is sweating while cooking and dancing while eating a donut. Phoebe as the Wall Street shark smoking while on two cell phones. Then theyre dancing in the fountain. Joey entering as Dr. Drake Remoray and meeting a groupie. Chandler trying to write as a bird does its business on his shoulder and falling asleep while typing. Ross doing some kara-tay and trying to get Carol into bed. And finally, some more dancing in the fountain, them all flexing, and the turning out the lamp and shutting off all the lights bit from the first season. Just remember one thing, this is an alternate universe. Everything from every other episode doesnt apply, for instance, Ross and Rachel have no history. And in fact have not seen each other in years in this world.}
Monica: Oh my God, sit down! Sit down! How long as it been since weve seen each other?
chandler: Now we can finally watch Green Acres the way it was meant to be seen.
(Ross retrieves his jacket and sees that not only has Emily arrived, but she as seen Rachel take her place on the plane.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is sitting at a table and Phoebe is on the couch. Chandler and Monica can be seen outside, shes lecturing him, and pushes him inside. He then nods to Rachel, and is obviously counting off the seconds in his head and then Monica makes a grand enterance.]
Chandler: Oh! Thats great, they havent seen the place since I moved in!
Joey: I know! I know! It turns out that one of the casting ladies has actually seen me in a play, so I steered clear of her
Devon: Do you realise that we have not seen each other since the night of that U2 concert?
Joey: (entering) Hey Gunther, have you uh, have you seen Chandler?
Ross: Hi! (To Mrs. Bing) Hi! (Mr. Bing starts rubbing his arm.) Hi. Has umm, anyone seen Chandler?
Chandler: Yeah, I've been to these places before, but I've never really seen them, you know.
[Cut to Chandler and Joey's, Ross is seen throwing the ball into the bathroom, presumably where Joey is currently using the facilities.]
ROSS: And I guess, you know, sometimes, she's a little ditzy, you know. And I've seen her be a little too into her looks. Oh, and Julie and I, we have a lot in common 'cause we're both paleontologists, but Rachel's just a waitress.
Phoebe: Yeah. (She notices some guy putting a coat on his girlfriend is trying to remember where hes seen her before.) (To him) Youre trying to figure out where you know me from? All right, Ill give you a hint. From porn! Okay? (He tries to rush his girlfriend out.) Yeah your pervert boyfriend watched me in a porno movie! (To Joey) See?
Phoebe: Youre the most beautiful bride Ive ever seen.
Rachel: Has anybody seen my engagement ring?
Chandler: Yes. It's very difficult to appreciate a Thanksgiving dinner once you've seen it in reverse.
Ross: But we haven't seen each other since then. Well I land in China, guess who's in charge of the dig.
Joey: Id seen this thing on The Discovery Channel...
Phoebe: Monica! We lived together for years! Ive seen you naked!
ROSS: Yeah but, you know, now that I think about it, I don't think I've ever seen Fun Bobby without a... a drink in his hand.
Joey: No-no-no I've seen it happen, you-you get a rapport going with a woman but somehow you manage to kill it. What's your secret?
MRS GREEN: I do. You didn't love Barry. And I've never seen you this happy. I look at you and I think, oh, this is what I want.
Monica: That would be a terrible punishment. But, I'm serious, I've never seen these before.
Ross: But we haven't seen each other since then. Well I land in China, guess who's in charge of the dig.
Rachel: Woow!I haven't seen you this worked up since you did that dog food commercial and you thought you were gonna be with a real talking dog!
Ross: I think It's the most beautiful table I've ever seen.
Joey: Have you seen Monica?
Chip: Amy Welch? Wow! I havent seen her since... So, Monica about ready?
David: (Stands up and speaks more loudly) Sorry, I wa- I was just saying to my friend that I thought you were the most beautiful woman that I'd ever seen in my- in my life. And then he said that- you said you thought
Joey: All right! Westminster Abbey! Hands down, best Abbey Ive ever seen. Hey! (Pushes Chandler in front of the camera.) Okay. What do you think of the Abbey, Chandler?
Phoebe: Yeah! It really has been great too, you know, some of this people must have seen me play before because they were requesting a bunch of my songs! Yeah, "You suck" and "shut up and go home".
Phoebe: Have you seen your guys body?
Phoebe: No Dr. Skeptismo! Im sure. First of all, okay, theres the feeling. (Chandler shrugs) Okay, and for another, how about the fact that she went into my guitar case which is lined with orange felt. (Rachel nods her head in unsure agreement) My Mothers favourite fish is Orange Roughy... (Joey thinks he understands, but then nods that he has no clue.) Cats....like....fish! (Ross and Rachel are totally lost) (to the cat) Hi, Mommy. (Rachel covers her mouth, in an Oh my God. gesture) Oh, I havent seen this smile in 17 years!
Rachel: I havent seen it yet!
Joey: Well, maybe a little. I wish you hadn't seen me throw up.
Elizabeth: Do you not want to be seen with me?
CHANDLER: OK, now wait a minute. That is the craziest typing test I've ever seen.
[Scene: Hotel's bar. Ross is running to Charlie trying not to be seen with two cocktails in his hands. She's hidden behind a huge plant]
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross is getting coffee as Joey comes from God knows where! Some back area of Central Perk around the corner that weve never seen! Weeeiiirrrddd .]
Chandler: Yes have you seen any?
David: Daryl Hannah was the most beautiful woman that he'd ever seen in his life and I said yeah, I liked her in Splash, a lot, but not so much in- in Wall Street, I thought she had kind of a
MONICA: Dad, dad this is a good thing for me. Ya know, and you even said yourself, you've never seen Richard happier.
Monica: Hey, have you seen Rachel?
Rachel: I haven't seen him in so long!
Monica: Oh no! My parents have never seen me drunk! (Pause) That they know of.
Chandler: Guys, I'd listen to her. The vein is bigger than I've ever seen it. (Monica looks at Chandler)
Chandler: You can always spot someone who's never seen one of his plays before. Notice, no fear, no sense of impending doom...
Rachel: I'm trying to put Emma down for a nap, have you seen Hugsy?
Monica: Have you seen Chandler?!
Ross: Well, you shouldve seen the guy that she used to go out with. I mean, hes like Joe Rugby.
Monica: Oh! Oh my God! That is the most beautiful top of a head I have ever seen! Chandler, you have to see this!
The Fan: Oh yeah! Ive seen all her movies.
MONICA: Tell him that you haven't seen your wife in a long time.� Tell him that having a long-distance relationship is really difficult.� Tell him that what little time we have is precious.
The Dry Cleaner: Ive never seen it!
MR. GELLER: I tell you, I've never seen him this happy.
Joey: There was a seen in Footloose...
Cheryl: My hamster. I hope she's okay, I haven't seen her in a while. Have a seat.
Chandler: Yes! I've-I've never seen a roll like this in my life!
Ross: Did you see the look that girl just gave me? Huh? She mustve seen me cruising in the bad boy.
Monica: Have you seen Chandler?
Rachel: Hey! Have you guys seen Jill? I cant find her anywhere.
PHOEBE: [Mrs. Adelman's voice] Oh my god. Now I've seen everything! [Phoebe's voice] Whoa, she's gone. She's gone. She's gone! Go ahead, get married. Go, go.
Ross: Gunther have you uh, have you seen Chandler?
PHOEBE: OK, hi. For your information this is exactly what I wanted. This is a tattoo of the earth as seen from a great distance. It's the way my mother sees me from heaven.
Mr. Douglas: Its pretty ugly. We havent seen an ANUS this bad since the seventies.
Woman No. 1: No. No, haven't seen a monkey. Do you know anything about fixing radiators?
Joey: How long since youve seen a girl naked?
Chandler: I havent seen this dress.
ROSS: This is so exciting, I haven't seen my monkey in almost a year.
Ross: Youve seen it, the Geller Yeller.
Rachel: I haven't seen you in like.. a year.
Ross: I've seen her at work, but I always figured, ah-huh? But, uh, I made her dinner. We had a great time. And we're going out again tomorrow.
Kash: Hey! How come I havent seen you here before?
Man: Well I actually, I-I really, I haven't seen her for years. But umm, well I-I was pretty tight with-with her and her daughter.
Monica: No, I-I havent seen your pink shirt.
Monica: That tape was never meant to be seen by... (pauses) Joey I would feel more comfortable if I was having this conversation in private.
Chloe: Hi guys. I havent seen you since this morning.
Rachel: Well, it was, and you would have seen it if you didn't showed up at (looks at his watch) ... 9:30?? God! Oh, this party was lame ...
Joey: No, sorry haven't seen him.
Joey: Youve seen my huge stack of porn right? (Phoebe nods.)
Phoebe: Yknow, this is probably none of my business, but werent you guys supposed to not be seen in public together?
Charlie: You've seen all the movies...
The A.D: Yeah, we loves em. Ive never seen him with(He gets a whiff of Joey and starts smelling around.)
Phoebe: Yeah, she came all the way back from Ross' building. Oh, the things she must have seen! And then she climbed up the fire escape and she tapped on the window with her teeny little paw and then we ran to let her in (Realizes, that Chandler starts to not believing her) I went to far, didn't I? When should I have stopped?
Paula: Listen. As someone who's seen more than her fair share of bad beef, I'll tell you: that is not such a terrible thing. I mean, they're your friends, they're just looking out after you.
Joey: Oh yeah, I still cant believe you havent seen Cujo. What is wrong with you?
>>> Joey's Subconscious So this is going pretty good. dinner was nice, got a lot in common. (Sees a magazine) Victoria's secret huh we even like the same books. (Walks over to a painting on the wall) Oh now there's a scary painting. wait a minute I think I've been scared by that painting before. (Looks around) You know what this whole place look familiar I have definitely been in this apartment I know I've seen this weird plant before (it's a cactus and he touch's it) AWCH! It did that the last time. Oh my god, I've gone out with this girl before yeah we had sex on this couch and then on that chair and no. no we didn't do it hear which is weird because it seems like a perfectly good place.
[Scene: The theatre where Joey is auditioning. Phoebe enters when Joey's on stage and she sits down. He hasn't seen her.]
Phoebe: Hey, have you guys seen Monica?
Joey: Id seen this thing on The Discovery Channel...
Phoebe:...Then I've already seen this one! (Turns off the TV.)
Ross: (sets out a bunch of shot glasses and starts to poor himself a drink, many drinks) Im an idiot. I mean shoulda seen it, I mean Carol and Id be out and shed, shed see some beautiful woman, and, and shed be Ross y'know look at her, and Id think, God, my wife is cool!
Ross: Have you seen this? It's a new alumni website for college! It's cool! You can post messages for people, let everyone know what you're up to.
Phoebe: Why? Who’d you seen him with?
Phoebe: Have you seen him throw a ball?
Monica: No, we haven't seen her since this morning.
MONICA: I've not seen her since high school graduation. Oh my God, that night she got so dru. . . motional.
Chandler: Hello...? Have you seen Joey's bat?
Joey: Wait a second, wait a second, where have I seen that cowgirl outfit before...
Phoebe: Oh my God! May I just say that you two gentlemen have the exact same hands! They're identical! Now, I've never seen anything like that in the business world.
Phoebe: Hey, have you seen Frank Jr., 'cause he's meeting me here with the triplets.