words in movies
Rachel: Listen yknow what sir? For the last time, I dont care what the computer says, we did not take a bag of Mashuga nuts from the mini-bar and we did not watch Dr. Do-Me-A-Little!
Chandler: And Im the happiest guy in the world! (Monica goes and sits down in a huff.) Oh honey, come on dont be upset. We still have so much to look forward to!
Monica: They wont be ready for weeks.
Monica: Oh thanks. (Reading the bill) Champagne, strawberries Oh my God! I cant believe Chandler ordered porn on our wedding night!
Chandler: Yeah but you dont need(Picks up something)What is this?
Ross: No you didnt.
Chandler: So you dont have the cameras?!
Monica: No! (Pause) But, theyre callin out to me! I mean this little guy (Holds up a small one) even crawled up into my lap. Oh come on, Chandler wouldnt mind if I opened just one present! What do you think it is?
Rachel: Shh-shh-shh! The guys dont know yet do they?
Monica: No! Joey and Ross dont know anything and Chandler still thinks that Phoebes pregnant.
Phoebe: Yeah thats right Chandler does still think Im pregnant. He hasnt asked me how Im feeling or offered to carry my bags. Boy, I feel bad for the woman who ends up with him. (Monica looks at her.) After you of course.
Rachel: Dont worry I promise that you will only have to be pregnant for a few more hours, cause Im going to tell the father today.
Phoebe: Pretty big? Its huge! God, this guy doesnt have a clue! Hes just walking down the street thinking, I had sex with Rachel Green. I rock! then bam! Hes a father and everythings different.
Phoebe: I dont. He got he-he-he-hes hit by a bus.
Rachel: Oh Joey! Joey! No, its not you! You didnt get anybody pregnant!
Phoebe: You dont know him. Its not important. He wants nothing to do with me or the baby. (She sits down like shes pregnant.)
Chandler: All my energy is going into not asking that question. I cant believe I screwed this up!
Ross: Im telling you, this looks exactly like your wedding! Arent these the same flowers?
Chandler: I dont know, Monica picked out the flowers.
Rachel: Phoebe the father is not here okay? I havent told him yet and I dont think I can tell him at all now!
Rachel: I dont know, let me think. I was walking down the street thinking, Im gonna tell the father today and then bam!
Rachel: I know, but I was just thinking about how huge this is for me. I didnt even go to how huge this was going to be for the father.
Monica: No! No! I shouldnt have even opened these! I mean IJoey I am out of control!! Joey, you have to do me a favor. No matter what I say, no matter what I do, please do not let me open another present! Okay?
Monica: You cant marry him!
Joey: Why?! Why cant she marry me?!
Monica: Phoebe I think he would notice if you didnt have a baby in nine months!
Joey: (smiles then stops) Now I cant believe it! What? Rachels pregnant? (The girls nod yes.) Whos the father?
Phoebe: We dont know.
Joey: About a month ago this guy spent the night with Rachel, I didnt see who it was but (He walks out and closes the door.)
Woman At The Wedding: It didnt click.
Woman At The Wedding: Why wont you take our picture?
Phoebe: I may play the fool at times, but Im a little more than a pretty blond girl with an ass that wont quit. (She takes the sweater out of her purse.) I believe this belongs to the father of your baby.
Chandler: Why dont you go up on stage. Ill get a picture of you doing the speech.
Tag: Yknow, Im actually glad Phoebe called. (He pulls out a stool and Rachel sits down.) I know we broke up because you thought I wasnt mature enough, but Ive really grown up and think we should get back together.
Monica: (throwing up the last present) I dont know how any of these got opened?!
Joey: Well, I dont know. I think it does something to salami.
Rachel: Oh wow, you didnt even try to unhook my bra!
Phoebe: I cant say that didnt hurt. But Ill take you back Joey Tribbiani.
Ross: Huh, didnt see that coming.
Chandler: Okay, so this isnt a picture of our first, but it is a picture of my first kiss with with this lady. Which by the look on your face Im sure youll remember. So we dont need(Rips the picture)Theres no need to have this picture. How about I take the real pictures and get them developed right now.
Ross: (shows Tag his sweater tag) Umm, I dont some Italian guy. Come on, read your own label. See you later.
Ross: (To Chandler) You dont think its a little crazy that you get all my points just cause you
Chandler: (in a high pitched voice) What?! I didnt even know thatWhy didnt you tell me?! (Pause) Why am I talking like this?!
Joey: No thats all right. Dont worry about it.
Liam: You dont say! (We see Ross who is hopping about with the ball and spikes it in his face.)
Monica: Oh dad, really you dont need to
Chandler: Oh, I dont think I ever heard that story.
Ross: Oh yeah! Wasnt she uh (Does the international sign for big boobies.)
Rachel: Noo! Maybe! I, I dont know. Ross, I still cant forgive you for what you did, I cant, I just, but sometimes when Im with you I just, I feel so...
Monica: No. No. Not it. Not it. Not it. (Checks another rack and another woman tries to reach around her.) (To the woman) Dont crowd me! (Finds it) This is it! This is the dress! Oh my God, its perfect! (She takes it off of the rack and someone has a hold of it on the other side of the rack and tugs on it.) Im sorry, this ones taken! (The other woman tugs harder pulling Monica through the rack.) Whoa!
Ross: I dont know Rachel, why?
Mr. Treeger:: Oh yeah, of course you dont!
Chandler: Okay. But if you dont come back soon, (She leaves and closes the door) theres pretty much nothing I can do about it!
Rachel: (laughs) Well okayWell dont ruin it! Just play along at least!
Chandler: No I didnt!
Monica: I dont know how museums work in England but, here, youre not supposed to take stuff.
Jill: Rachel and I had a really big fight, can I come in? I-I mean I know were not supposed to see each other anymore and Im okay with that, its just that I dont know anybody in the city and I really need somebody to talk to about it.
Chandler: We cant accept this.
Chandler: Dont worry about it Pheebs.
Ticket Counter Attendant: Im sorry sir, I dont understand.
Monica: Oh my God Chandler! I cant believe it!
Chandler: I dont want him to tell this story for years.
Ross: Whoa-whoa, arent you a little over dressed?
Monica: Rachel! Rachel! You havent touched Eldads hair!
Monica: I know! I know! And he totally freaked out and I cant find him anywhere!
Rachel: What do you mean you quit?! You cant quit!
Ross: Okay Phoebe, I guess youre next (To Joey) although I really dont see the point.
Joey: I cant believe this Chandler!
Ross: She is not (Realizes) Shes gay. Oh my God. She is so gay! I cant believe this.
David: Uh, I-I-I was hoping to run into you here. I didnt know whether I should call or not, yknow I-I was only in town for a few days. And yknow, I didnt want to intrude on your life or-or anything like that, but I-I really wanted to see you andbut I didnt know if you wanted to see me.
Monica: I cant believe it! That there is no money for my wedding?!
Ross: It wasnt the best.
Joey: No-no-no! Look, Ive been thinking about it. Im an actor right? So I wont get nervous talking in front of people.
Joey: Oh, you werent finished?
Joey: A date?! No, no Pheebs you-you must be mistaken, because I know you wouldnt schedule a date on the same night you have plans with a friend!
Rachel: No-no! Dont dance for me! Please? Dont! (She gets up to yell at her friends.) What is the matter with you guys?
Monica: I cant tell you. Its a secret.
Terry: Why dont we start right now!
Tag: I cant believe it!
Phoebe: Okay, dont give me a reason to get mad, okay
Megan: Look, you dont want to fight me.
Ross: Uh, yeah! I still cant believe she hates Pottery Barn!
Chandler: I had too okay?! Were getting married! Married couples cant keep secrets from one another!
Rachel: You guys are really right there arent you?
Rachel: I Well, I dont think they need any help.
Joey: Yeah, yknow at first I thought we could talk about this yknow, work it out, but uh, seeing you two together I dont think I
Phoebe: Y'know what, it doesnt matter what you say it's not gonna make a difference anyway, so you can just go.
Terry: I cant help you Joey.
Tag: I dont think I should say.
Monica: Chandler, we still havent gotten an RSVP from your dad.
Joey: Of course Im jokin! I dont take checks.
Rachel: You have not worn that T-shirt since you were 15!! It doesnt even fit you anymore!
Chandler: Because if I go home, were gonna become the Bings! I cant be the Bings!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is performing, his music hasnt improved.]
Ross: Look, what do you want me to do? Do you want me to call everyone in the entire school and tell them it wasnt true?!
Joey: All right, okay, now, we just have to make sure she doesnt find out some other way. (spins the chair around so that Ross is facing him) Did you think about the trail?
Joey: (laughs) I dont think so.
Chandler: We cant tell him, you cant go up to a guy you barely know and talk about his.... stuff.
Phoebe: I dont have it!
Phoebe: It does! How would you feel if you couldnt share your cooking? Or-or imagine how Ross would feel if he couldnt teach us about dragons.
Monica: I dont know! Time to kiss a guy maybe?! (Ross laughs.) What are you laughing at Pampers? (He stops laughing and glares at her.)
Chandler: I cant help it!
Joey: I dont know Rach.
Joey: I dont know. You uh, you got something for me?
Phoebe: You dont have to be back for a half-hour!
Hypnosis Tape: Cigarettes dont control you. You are a strong, confident woman, who does not need to smoke.
Joey: Well, hes too shy, he doesnt thing hes good enough to dance with girls yet.
Monica: Because then I dont have to!
Rachel: (thinks) I dont know.
Ross: No, no, we will. We just wont tell her she messed up.
Joey: Well, I dont know!!
Joey: (looking around) You got me. I dont
Joey: (lying on a beach towel, recapping what happened in the last episode) Okay, so we went to the beach, because Phoebe found out about this lady who knew her mom and dad, and I dont really know what happened with that.
Ross: No! No we dont!
Ross: We cant do it again.
Phoebe: You dont play the oboe!
Chandler: So this is nice! I wish I didnt have to go, believe me! But unfortunately I have to. (He gets up and Joey moves over next to Ross.) Oh uh, by the way, whats the name the girl youre dating?
Monica: I dont know. (Picks up a big plate from the coffee table.) Hey, Rachel, you want the big plate? I want you to have the big plate.
Joey: He said that he wasnt gonna apologize because you guys are living here illegally, so instead what hes gonna do is have you evictedIll see you later.
Ross: Actually, it wasnt that close.
Rachel: Why? Is he? He is! Isnt he? Hes dating that slut in marketing!
Ross: Okay, so it wasnt uh, a traditional massage. But I did give him accu-pressure with a pair of chopsticks. And, and I gently exfoliated him with, with a mop.
Monica: I cant believe you. You still havent told that girl she doesnt have a job yet?
Ross: I dont think so. Hello? (Knocks on the glass, which angers the big, large, angry dog behind the glass and causes them to jump to the other side of the landing.) When you get in there (Joey nods his disapproval.)
Chandler: You didnt bring me here to do that, did you?
Monica: (gives her a look) Gee, I dont know Rach. Order up!! I got a Yentel soup, a James Beans, and a Howdy hold the Dowdy!
Phoebe: (Looking relieved. She puts down the phone.) Oh thank god. Oh, you changed your mind. Oh, look I know you probably want to be alone, and you dont want to talk about it, thats fine. I just want you to know, I think you are doing the right thing and...
Smart Kid: Isnt the Mastodon from the Pliocene Epic?
Joey: You wont boss me around anymore?
Rachel: (does a retching sound) Wait a minute! Why dont you guys do something?!
Phoebe: Didnt you sleep together?
Joey: Hey! Its my fashion girls! (They dont react.) Whats wrong?
Ross: Is-isnt it the best?
Phoebe: So far, it kinda blows. I dont know, I just thought y'know that hed feel more like a brother y'know, like you and Ross, just like close and connected and....
Monica: They wouldnt have put it there if it didnt do something! How can you not care?
Joey: I dont know. Just uh, just tell em it was a mix-up with the invitations, orNo-no-no! Blame it on the post office. They hate the post office. And the Irish! But I dont think you can blame it on them so (He dials the phone and hands it to Monica.)
Monica: (To Chandler) Our kids are gonna call her Aunt Janice arent they?
Joey: I totally dont know what youre talking about.
Ross: Yknow what, I dont know how comfortable I am going to see how hot the sex is between some guy and your girlfriend.
Chandler: Sorry! I-I-I dont know what to say.
Rachel: Yeah, dont push it though.