words in movies
Phoebe: Well thats no way to sell newspapers. Why dont you try, "Extra! Extra! Read all about it!"
Ross: No, Monicas restaurant got a horrible review in the Post. (They all gasp.) I didnt want her to see it, so I ran around the neighborhood and bought all the copies I could find. (He hands the paper to Phoebe and they all read it.)
Monica: You dont think that umm, (reading) "The chefs Mahi Mahi was awful awful," is bad press?
Rachel: I didnt write it.
Rachel: Umm, our situation. Yknow umm, what we mean to each other. And I mean we-were having this baby together, and we live together. Isnt that, isnt that weird?
Joey: (entering) Hey uh Monica, I cant remember. Did we say we were gonna meet here or at the movies?
Chandler: And people say you dont pay attention. No, this is a much better job. Its vice-president of a company that does data reconfiguration and statistical factoring for other companies.
Chandler: The front page? You really do live in your own little world, dont ya?
Cashier: Why dont you fill out this address card. (Hands him one.)
Rachel: Oh. Oh yeah, dont get to worked up over it. I mean it-it sounds like hes a doctor, but hes not.
Rachel: Oh, it was great! We got everything that we needed! Oh and Ross, almost got something that wasnt on the list. A whore.
Phoebe: Well did she know you two werent married?
Rachel: You dont understand! You didnt see how brazen she was.
Phoebe: Yeah, just dont get your hopes up.
Phoebe: Yknow! You dont make a very good first impression.
Phoebe: Oh you dont know.
The Food Critic: I dont see any reason why I would do that to myself again.
Ross: Oh! Wow! Uh, yeah! That sounds great. Im just gonna put this (The money) back in my pocket, pretend that didnt happen. Uh yeah, actually Im free now. Do you wanna grab some coffee or
Chandler: I cant even believe this! I really come off that badly?
Phoebe: All right, dont freak out! Okay? I-I will help you. How long before you have to leave?
Phoebe: I cant help you.
Monica: Oh no! I dont know anything about cooking. I had to ask someone what its called when the, when the water makes those little bubbles.
Monica: I-I-Im sorry, your-your mouth was full, I didnt hear what you said. Umm, hats off to who now?
Chandler: I think youll find if I come to work here, I dont micro-manage. I dont shy away from delegating.
Phoebe: Um-hmm, thats good to know. But lets stop focusing on what you dont do, and start focusing on what you do do.
Phoebe: Okay, dont worry. Youre ready.
Monica: Wow! A star! (The class glares at her.) I know you all hate me and-and Im sorry, but I dont care.
Monica: Excuse me? He doesnt even know what hes doing!
Monica: Okay then, I dont stink. Im a good chef. Okay. (Starts to leave.)
Joey: Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! I dont want to go. Im having fun.
Chandler: No dont I beg of you!
Chandler: Yeah I gotta say thank you, I was really nervous. Yknow Ive been told I come on to strong, make to many jokes, and then it was really hard to sidestep that duty thing. (The interviewer doesnt understand) Duties. (Still doesnt.) Duties! (Still doesnt.) Poo. (Still doesnt.)
Chandler: Oh my God this doesnt count! Okay? The interview was over, that was the real Chandler Bing in there, this is just some crazy guy out in the hall! Call security! Theres a crazy guy out in the hall!
Rachel: No! No, shesShe was nice. I mean, shes a little slutty, but who isnt?
Rachel: I dont want you to date her!
Rachel: Yes! And not because I want you to go out with me, but because I dont want you to go out with anybody! Okay? I know its a terrible thing to even think this, and its completely inappropriate, but I want you to be at my constant beck and call 24 hours a day! Im very sorry, but that is just the way that I feel.
Ross: I wont date. Ill uh, Ill be here, with you, all the time.
Ross: We live together. Youre having our baby. Im not gonna see anybody else. Are you-are you sure you dont want something more?
Rachel: (pause) Wow! I dont know, maybe. Im
(They both laugh. Ross sits down, but Rachel doesnt move and is lost in thought.)
Joey: Well I had a great time! Learned how to bake, ate great food, thats the first A Ive gotten since seventh grade, and I didnt have to sleep with the teacher this time.
Monica: I cant believe this! (Storms out.)
Monica: We’re waiting for the adoption lady, but, hey, I’m glad you’re here. I was cleaning this morning and I found this (she puts a box on the table and opens it). I don’t know if you wanna use it, but…
Phoebe: Umm, look it, you-you cant kill yourself.
Phoebe: No-no I cant! I cant let you do it!
Earl: It doesnt really seem like enough to be fate.
Chandler: Yes, if it really doesnt mean anything, because you know that Im just not ready
Kristen: Well Joey doesnt like to talk about it but, hes one of the stars of Days Of Our Lives.
Joey: Well, ah, Im an actor. Im fairly neat. I ah, I got my own TV. Oh, and dont worry Im totally okay with the gay thing.
Phoebe: Yeah, but you shouldnt compare yourself to me.
Monica: I cant believe you bought this.
Joey: All right, uh, weve got a little bit of a problem here. These people are my friends; you cant treat them that way.
Joey: Pheebs, I am so sorry! I know I promised you a fun road trip with your friend and I didnt deliver. But-but-but now I know that you think being awake is an important part of friendship! So, so, so I will strive to-to stay awake for as long as I know you.
Rachel: I dont know, I dont know. Urrrgh! Look, maybe we should take a break.
Ross: Well I have to. Okay? If I dont, theyll take the class away from me. And I already put it in my family newsletter.
Michelle: No don�t worry, this is not some rebound thing. I am totally over Eric.
Supervisor: (laughs) Why dont we do a trial run.
Ross: No! But we-we didnt have sex-uh, did we? I mean, I dont remember much about last night, it was such a blur.
Ross: I really wish that you wouldnt.
Ross: Dont thank me! If you wanna thank something, thank the volcano that erupted thousands of years ago, killing but perfectly preserving an entire civilization. (Rachel just looks at him.) Heres Warrens number.
Rachel: Ross, I really dont think
[Flashback to: A street, Ross is sitting in his newly purchased MGB. Which is one of the better British sports cars ever made. Of course, better is a relative term. Which reminds me of a joke. Why dont the British make computers? Because they couldnt figure out how to make them leak oil. Anyway, the gang is all staring at his new purchase.]
Joey: What, oh, oh, oh, no, no, I cant, I cant tell you that, its like the most awful, horrible thing Ive ever done my whole life.
Monica: Wouldnt you love to do it just once?! (Raises her hand towards Chandler.)
Chandler: Dont do it.
Sid: I still cant believe it! Im the luckiest guy in the world!
Ross: But-but, if you dont love this, well do it in any other place at any other time. Really, its fine, whatever you want.
Phoebe: I dont know.
Phoebe: I didnt know Playboy prints jokes.
Rachel: Well obviously I wont be able to come, for those of you who havent checked their calendars today is my due date. Well yknow, I just want to take a moment and thank you guys for how great youve been during this time. I really couldnt have done it without you. And I have loved these last nine months! And even though I am so looking forward to the next part, I am really gonna miss being pregnant.
Rachel: I dont think so.
Phoebe: No I didnt!
Rachel: Phoebe! You cant do th
Rachel: What handsome is not your type? Smart? Kind? Good kisser? What those things arent on your list? Ross is a great guy! You would be lucky to be with him!
Ross: I cant believe they-they didnt even tell us!
Rachel: Well why shouldnt I?!
Rachel: I dont know!
Phoebe: I’m sorry, I can’t believe I set you up with such a MONSTER!
Cecilia: They dont?
Phoebe: Yeah I know what I wanted to ask you. Um, can you roll your tongue? Because I can, and my Mom couldnt, and I thought y'know, I figured that was something I got from our Dad.
Ross: So-so come! Why dont you come?
Phoebe: Well, why dont you just get him fired?
Phoebe: I dont know. I-I think its still gonna be a while.
Joey: (as Jessica) I dont think so.
Joey: Yknow, we dont have to imagine.
Ben: Dont talk to me now!
Monica: (from the bedroom) Dont come in here!
Ross: Ehh, I dont, I dont think so. Shes already talked about yknow, dating other guys.
Chandler: You dont want to be guys, youd be all hairy and wouldnt live as long. (Starts to go to his bedroom)
Chandler: (To Monica) Yknow, we havent found anybody else.
Chloe: I want you to met some friends of mine. (Introduces him to Chandler and Joey) This guy is my hero, he comes in with some stuff he wants it blown up 400%, we said we dont do that, and he says you gotta. And y'know what, we did it. And now anytime anybody wants 400, we just say lets Ross it!
Monica: You dont have a car. And your license expired.
Joey: Give me a number, I dont want to owe you anything!
Chandler: Well then why cant I see it?
Ross: Okay! You guys are getting married tomorrow and-and I couldnt be more thrilled for both of you, but as Monicas older brother I-I have to tell you this. If you ever hurt my little sister, if you ever cause her any unhappiness of any kind, I will hunt you down, and kick your ass! (Chandler laughs.) What? Im-Im-Im serious! (Chandler laughs harder.) ComeHey! Dude! Stop it! Okay? Im-Im not kidding here!
Rachel: Dont do that.
Rachel: No! Dont say that! Dont say that!
Ben: Dont do that.
Chandler: But we dont know the neighbors.
Rachel: Oh my God! Oh my God! I cant go! Im gonna be too nervous!
(Chandler laughs, turns, and sees that Ross and Joey arent happy.)
Joey: I knew I shouldnt have mentioned it! Thats what I wanted to name my kid!
Rachel: When the Louis Vuitton people found out that Ralph Lauren wanted me back, the offered me more money! Isn’t that great?
Ross: (To Rachel) I wasnt talking to you.
Chandler: I would but mine doesnt fit. The pants are a little tight.
Rachel: Its just so frustrating! Why doesnt she want my breast?!
Elizabeth: Ohh, I wouldnt do it in there. Thats my dads bedroom.
Rachel: I didnt. I got under him.
Whitney: (outside the door) Uh, your door isnt sound proof.
Rachel: Joey I dont think you know what behalf means.
Joey: (opening his door) If I cant have it you cant have it! (Rachel walks away angrily.)
Joey: God, its gonna so weird like when I come home and youre not here. Yknow? No more Joey and Chans. No more J and Cs. "You wanna go over to Joey and Chandlers?" "Cant, its not there."
Monica: And Dad, yknow that mailman that you got fired? He didnt steal your Playboys! Ross did!
Phoebe: Oh my God! Youre right! Go! (Monica starts to leave.) Go tell Chandler! Hurry before its too late! Wait no! (Monica stops.) Does this also mean putting out doesnt get you love? (Monica is shocked.)
Joey: They have a kid together, y'know. Theyre like, theyre like a family, and if, I dont know, theres chance they could make that work, I know I wouldnt want to be the guy who stood in the way of that. Are you okay? Do you wanna ah, come poke a nude guy?
Joey: Yeah! Okay. (Joey picks a card.) Phoebe, you look, I cant.
Chandler: No-no! This is my fiancee (Phoebe) and her heart was set on that ring. You dont want to break her heart now do you?
Monica: (yelling after them) I cant believe youre gonna have sex on my engagement night!!
Phoebe: So that story doesnt make you cry?
Monica: Uh I really dont know what to tell you Rach, I really dont. I mean, maybe Joey can help you out with your, with your big work problem.
Chandler: Let me see this guy. (Phoebe hands him the picture.) W-H-Wow! Dont show this to Monica! And dont tell her about the W-H-Wow!
Chandler: I cant believe you dont know what I do for a living!
Joey: Its just I cant because my manager said I (Gets an idea) (Starts singing) "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Annie
Ross: Yknow, I dont think were going to settle this.
Monica: Oh, yknow what, I cant, it really kills.
Monica: But you told them you werent?
Monica: So to get this part you cant be?
Joey: Yeah may-maybe you dont tell anyone about this.
Phoebe and Rachel: (to each other) I dont know.
Rachel: (giggles and cant look at him) Hi!
Phoebe: Hmm, they just dont make em like that anymore!
Rachel: Oh honey, dont worry. I really do feel like tomorrows the day.
Rachel: Seriously, your dad doesnt like pranks.
Rachel: And you know, we said that we would, we would live together as long as this makes sense. An maybe this, you know,Just doesn�t make sense anymore.
Rachel: Oh tomorrow, oh I dont know. Um
Ross: Anyway, if she, if she wasnt in to me, why-why would she ask me out again?
Kim: I didnt read it.
Chandler: No Rach, its not just you. My thirtieth birthday certainly wasnt that much fun.
Joey: Ah yeahwait a second now! Look were gonna have to set a spending limit on the date. I dont have the money to take her to a fancy place like that.
Joey: I dont think so.
Joey: You dont think I know that!