words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel has just gotten home and is going through the mail. She finds something that's Monica's and goes over and knocks on her closed bedroom door.]
Rachel: Y'know what, just give me a second and I'll be out of your hair. I'm just gonna grab a jacket. When I get back, I want every little detail. (There's a knock on the door.) Maybe that's him. (Goes to answer the door.)
Monica: Oh that's great!
Joey: A little uh, good deed for PBS and a little TV exposure, now that's the kind of math Joey likes to do!
Joey: That's because all people are selfish.
Ross: No wait! Look, wait! Okay, you can hang up, but I'm gonna keep calling! I'm gonna, I'm gonna call everyone in England if that's what it takes to get you to talk to me!
Chandler: Really?! That's what you heard? (To Monica) You said that?
Monica: That's great!
Joey: That's great. But uh, I'm not really expecting a lot of calls.
Ross: Oh that is so great! That's
Monica: Yeah! But, he can't not exactly see Emily, I mean that's his wife.
Chandler: That's true!
Chandler: That's true!
Joey: See, there was kind of a mix up in my agent's office, but I'm still on TV and that's good exposure.
Ross: (entering) Okay, that's it. I cannot make this decision! It is too difficult, so I'm just gonna leave it entirely to the gods of fate. (He holds up and starts shaking a )
Rachel: Ok, that's it! Just give'em to me! I'll split them up! (she tries to snatch the bowl from Joey's hands but she can't, so she pinches his nipple and she manages to take it)
Chandler: That's great.
Chandler: Hey, that's...'joincidence' with a 'C'!
Ross: Yeah... Yeah, that's true.
Rachel: That's what we decided.
Chandler: That's what we were gonna name the baby.
Monica: Joey, we know that's you.
Joey: Yeah, well, that's fine, but the important thing is that I finished it. And uh, I think it's really good, but y'know it'd really help me is if I could hear it. So would you guys read it for me?
Joey: Oh, I-I, I think that's the first time I ever missed a meal! (Checks his pants.) Yeah, my pants are a little loose!
Rachel: Look, Ross, he's just... Sandy is just sensitive, that's all.
Mike: I'm not blowing her off, I actually just got off the phone with her, were going out tomorrow night, I mean I hope that's ok with you stranger from the coffee house.
Chandler: That's great!
Phoebe: That's like the third time that lady's won on a machine I was playing.
Monica: That's terrible!
Ross: That's great! So you're staying in New York!
Erica: That's because I'm pregnant!
Rachel: Yeah! That's Phoebe. That's Phoebe. You know, she just wants them all! It's like she's a nympho!
Ross: That's what it seemed like.
Chandler: I mean, I know that's not possible, but he does.
Chandler: (To Monica) Well, now we have one of each! (To the doctor) And that's enough!
Phoebe: Honey, that's gorgeous!
Joey: Hey, maybe that's for the best.
Phoebe: That's okay Rachel. I'm not judging you; that's just who you are. Me. I'm more free y'know? I run like I did when I was a kid, cause that's the only way it's fun. Y'know, I mean didnt you ever run so fast you thought your legs were gonna fall off? Y'know, like when you were like running towards the swings or running away from Satan? (Rachel looks confused) The neighbor's dog.
Joey: (disappointed) Oh... oh, but that's ok, I'll find someone else to do it... I'll do it alone, but... I don't know what happens if the sea turtle catches you...
Ross: That's alright. Listen, listen.
Rachel: She was just crawling around and she found him, so I just let her sleep with him. That's all right? Isn't it?
Monica: Well, that's it. Everything's packed.
Monica: Oh, yeah, that's true.
Caitlin: Y'know what? That's okay, you guys have ordered so many that this one is on me! (Runs for her life.)
Joey: That's fine. I'll just have a Tic-Tac to hold me over.
Rachel: Well, I guess that's all in the past, now.
Rachel: Oh God, that's right. I blocked that out.
Chandler: Well, I did and it hurt. (they walk towards the bar) That's when I wrote the song: "Betrayal In The Common Room".
Ross: That's funny, that, no, because, uh, our parents actually did, uh, send our dog off to live on a farm.
Erica: Oh my God, that's just like my name!
CHANDLER: [looks in the fish bowl to see a fish cracker] Well that's not an, even a real fish. No, that's a goldfish cracker.
Chandler: Yeah! I've never been in a relationship that's lasted this long before. Y'know to get past the beginning and still be around each other all the time, I think that's pretty incredible. And the fact that this is happening all with you, yeah I think that's pretty exciting. (Kisses her.)
Phoebe: Okay. (Starts running crazily with her arms flapping and her legs far apart) Come on! That's not running! Let's go! (Rachel pauses, then follows, embarrassed.)
RACH: Closure, that's what it is. Closure. [she looks around the restaurant, spotting a guy with a cellular phone] Hello, excuse me. Excuse me, hel. . . woo [she almost falls out of her chair]
CHANDLER: That's what's weird? Joey, the man's been captain of a cereal for the last 40 years.
Phoebe: Um, that's really your decision, I mean, some people prefer, you know, to take off...oh whoops! You're being naked!
Chandler: Oh, that's The Wedding March. Does, does that freak you out?
Phoebe: Okay, first I'm not crazy. And second, say it don't spray it. Anyway his name is Malcom, and he wasn't following me, I mean he was, but 'cause he thought I was Ursula, ick. And, that's why, that's why he couldn't just come up and talk to me. 'Cause of the restraining order.
CHANDLER: That's right.� You're husband's home.� So, now the sex can stop.
Ross: (in his head) Oh my God! That's Rachel naked! I can't look at that! I am looking at this. (Looks back at his book.) Okay, vivid colors, expressive brush strokesUnless she wants me to be looking at that. She knows I'm home. She knows I can see her. What kind of game is she playing? I think maybe someone's lonely tonight. Oh-ho, Dr. Geller! Stop it! You're being silly! Or, am I?
PHOEBE: [cutting Mrs. Greene off] Ha-ha, that's great, ha-ha. I can't wait to hear the rest of it, ya know, but I really have to go to the bathroom so... Hey, come with me. Yeah, yeah, it'll be like we're gal pals, ya know, like at a restraunt. Oh, it'll be fun, c'mon. [they go in the bathroom]
Rachel: That's right! 'Cause that would give him the control! So now he's all ooh, coming up with this whole I've got a party thing y'know, trying to get me to hint around for an invitation. Blew up in his face, didn't it?
Chandler: That's great. (To Monica.) Can I see the book?
Phoebe: By the time anyone's figured out what we've done, we'll be in sunny Mexico. (BEAT) Oh, wait, that's the end of a different plan.
RACHEL: (after a pause with everyone staring at her, she goes up to the microphone) Ya, know what Barr, I'm not gonna leave. I probably should, but I'm not, see 'cause I promised myself that I would make it through at least *one* of your weddings (da-doom-chesh). See now, tonight, all I really wanted was to make it though this evening with a little bit of grace and dignity. Well (laughing), I guess we can all agree that's not gonna happen. There's nothing really left to say except....(starts singing) "Her name was Lola. She was a showgirl. With yellow feathers (band joins in), feathers in her hair, and a dress cut down to there. She would..."
Monica: Oh! You assume because I was heavy that's the only way I could win something?
Mike: Okay, when I got divorced, I didn't think I'd feel this way about someone for a really long time... Then again, I didn't think I'd meet someone like you... and... this may be crazy soon, but... I want you to have this... (He tries to get something from his pocket, but it's not that easy... Phoebe looks in a "what's happening" face to him. He finally has found something) No, not... that's gum. (He digs in a little more.) Ooh, five bucks... I love it when that happens, you know... Think no note's there...
Mike: Oh she's my girlfriend. That's not just how we do it here. I got to get a break and when we come back we've got Kennethsinging "I touch myself"...I'm not here to judge!
Amy: Oh. That's a funny noise.
Ross: Right, so that's a firm "no". I cannot believe this, I just keep striking out.
Phoebe: (not smiling) That's not good.
Joey: What? No, the only reason I'm going to their stupid new house, is so I can point out everything that's wrong with it, so they don't move. I'm gonna make them stay here.
Ross: And that's just the herbivores. I'm not even gonna discuss the carnivores, their heads are already too big. Which is ironic considering their stunted cerebral development.
Rachel: (Reading from a tag that's attached to the shoe) "Dear losers, do you really think I'd hide presents under the couch? P.S.: Chandler, I knew they'd break you."
ROSS: Wait hold on Tony, hold on. [answers second line] Hello. Hi, yeah no, she's right here. Um hold on. [gets first line] Hi Tony, can I call you back? That's uh, that's my sister's boyfriend.
Phoebe: No, I know. That's a part of the whole, you know, them-not-liking-you-extravaganza.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, we're having spaghetti! That's.... easy.
Ross: You know what the scariest part is? What if there's only one woman for everybody, y'know? I mean what if you get one woman- and that's it? Unfortunately in my case, there was only one woman- for her...
Joey: I know, I know..., but that's okay. I mean, we can control ourselves, we're not animals.
PHOEBE: Well, you kind of just did.� That guy is going to call you tonight.� Ross is going to pick up the phone and that's a pretty clear message.
Chandler: Hey, that's... that's 'joincidence' with a 'C'!
Phoebe: This is fashion?! (Grabs the coat from Rachel.) Okay, so to you, death is fashion?! That's really funny. (She puts the coat on and starts to model it.) Here's Phoebe umm, sporting uh, y'know, cutting edge hairy carcass from y'know, the steal traps of wintry Russia. I mean, you really thing this looks good? (Sees herself in the mirror.) 'Cause I do.
Chandler: (astonished) I don't think that's exactly...
Monica: That's what it says here. Flight 421, leaves at 8:40, Newark airport.
MNCA: You know, that's true. You'd be a great person to have around the day after an emergency.
Joey: C'mon, you guys. This is a real movie, and Al Pacino's in it, and that's big!
Sandy: (In a puppet voice) So you see Wigglemunch, that's why it's important to shaaaaaaare...
MONICA: Um, I straightened out your shower curtain so you won't get mildew. What? To me that's nice.
Ross: And that's bad because..., you hate chicken piccata?
Monica: Yeah. The great thing about the jam plan was, I was taking control of my life. So I asked myself, what is the most important thing to me in the world and that's when I came up with the baby plan.
JOEY: So, assistant to the director. That's a really exciting job, I mean, you must have a ton of cool responsibilities.
Maitre d': I'm sorry. That's always mr Campbell's table.
Monica: That's the nicest anyone has ever said to me!
Ross: That's funny, because you know, you are a huge crapweasel!
Rachel: Oh my god Chandler! If you can't handle this, what are you going to be like in the hospital? With the blood and the screaming and the little present that's shooting out of her!?
Ross: (interrupts him) Okay, that's right, yes, but on Hanukkah, uh, we sing, uh (Sings) Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel, I made you out of clay.
Joey: That's some gentle comedy, dude. (he and Ross leave)
JOEY: Look, I'm sorry but that's what Joseph does, ok. If you try to pull somethin', he'll call you on it. 'What're you tryin' to pull,' he'll say.
Joey: Ah, can I just say I know we're doing this for Ross, and that's cool, but if it was up to me, this is not what we'd be doing on our first date.
JOEY: Shh, OK, here I come, here I come. See I'm comin' to fix the copier, I can't get to the copier, I'm thinkin' what do I do, what do I do. . . so I just watch 'em have sex. And then I say, wait, here's my line, [Joey from TV] you know that's bad fo r the paper tray.
Charity guy: Oh, actually, that's the shirt I wore to the gym.
CHANDLER: Wow, that's lucky. What if her name was Big Ugly Splotch?
Ross: Wow, free crab cakes. Well, that's nice. Although I was hoping to have sex tonight.
Joey: (realizing) Oh! That's Alicia Mae Emory's outfit!
Fake Monica: Well, that's just probably 'cause of your Amish background.
Ross: Oh, that's right! (to Emma) Daddy and uncle Joey are going on a trip today. We're going to a conference in Barbados, right?
Ross: And if you think about it, I mean the reason he memorized all that stuff is because he thought it was important to you. You know, that's the kind of guy Joey is.
Ross: so then President Steve told everyone that I was a cheapskate, and now the whole building hates me! A little kid spit on my knee! Y'know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna throw a party. That's right. For everyone in the building, and I'm gonna sit them down and explain to them, I am not a bad guy. I am not a cheap guy! I'm just a guy who-who stands up for what he believes in. A man with principles.
ROSS: Uh Joey, that's just the minumum amount due, that's your total due.
Phoebe: Um, um. It's huge. Yeah, that's the moment, when-when, you know she stopped being a princess, and became, like, a woman, you know.
Monica: What? what? He obviously thinks that's a nice way to be proposed to, plus he'd never suspect it!
Guy: Oh, that's great. I'm stalking the wrong woman. I am such a dingus!
Rachel: Sure Pheebs, you know, that's what it's there for, emergencies and pretend agents.
Sandy: That's fair... Although, can I ask... why do you think that is?
MONICA: No I didn't, I said kiwi lime. That's what makes it so special.