words in movies
Ross: God that is the most beautiful engagement ring ever!
Chandler: It is going to be perfect. I am taking her to her favorite restaurant. Im going to get her a bottle of the champagne that she really loves; therefore knows how expensive it is. Then when the glasses are full, instead of proposing a toast Im just gonna propose.
Joey: That sounds perfect!
Phoebe: I can do that for the kids.
Chandler: Wait a minute, all jokes aside? I didnt agree to that!
Joey: Thats not what she said last night. (Ross glares at him.)
Rachel: (breaking up) Were just really very excited about this charity event that we have to go to.
Ross: Oh, you have to call the police! Thats what I did to the kids in my building!
Joey: I won! That was my guess!
Chandler: Oh, yeah. (Starts to take it off and then realizes) Uh, no you cant have my jacket! Because then I would be cold! If you thought that you were going to be cold, you shouldve brought your own jacket. But uh, other than that, are you okay? Are you okay?
Monica: Ohh thats sweet!
Chandler: What?! Im Chandler! (She nods towards the doorway, Chandler turns and looks) Oh, thats Richard!
(Monica smiles then acts shocked. Chandler cant believe she just did that.)
Chandler: Hey-hey, hey! (Gets up and hugs him.) I dont know why I did that!
Monica: YeahOh thats right. You, you always wanted me too. Hey, I see you got your mustache back.
Richard: That might be fun. (Richard and Lisa sit down.)
Joey: Just out of curiosity, how-how much is that boat worth?
Mr. Thompson: Thats good. Very good! (Walks away.)
Rachel: (stopping him) Hey! You cant leave Joey! You agreed to buy that boat, all right?! That is a contract! And plus if you leave, my boss is gonna kill me!
Joey: Well, what am I gonna do Rach?! I dont have that kind of money!
Ross: What? (Excited) A-ohh! (Realizes) Ohh. Oh thats right thats right. Thats Richards favorite place too.
Chandler: Oh you knew that. Good!
Monica: Why dont you just weigh out the good stuff about the relationship against the bad stuff. I mean thats what I did when I first (looks at Chandler and pauses) weighing stuff.
Ross: No! No! I didnt do that. Its just Okay, honestly no. I dont, I dont see a big future with her.
Monica: Okay well I think thats your answer.
Emil Alexander: That was me.
Mr. Bowmont: Thats me.
Joey: Ahh, yes. (Pushes Rachel in front of himself so that she could do the talking.)
Rachel: Oh well, hello. This is your lucky day Mr. Bowmont, the uh gentleman day sailer as just become available again and I believe that you made a bid of $18,000.
Joey: You-you have to pay that! Its not just a guess.
Mr. Bowmont: I dont think shed like that.
Rachel: Okay look, let me paint you a little picture. (She sits down next to him.) All right, you are settin sail up the Hudson! Youve got the wind in your h(sees that hes bald)arms! You-you get all that peace and quiet that youve always wanted! You get back to nature! You can go fishin! You canooh, you can get one of those little hats and have people call you captain, and then when youre old, Cappy.
Joey: All that stuff you just said? I want that!
Chandler: Thats right, I can throw her off. I can make her think marriage is the last thing on my mind.
Phoebe: Yeah! Yeah! Convince her that-that youre scared of commitment! Convince her that youre a little coward!
Chandler: I can do that, Ive had 30 years of practice.
Joey: That guys still doing that?!
Joey: Yeah! And also, a little like a French guy. (They both squint at each other.) I never noticed that before.
Monica: Well thats a little crazy. Although I am yknow glad to hear that youre branching out on what you look at on the Internet.
Monica: Okay well thats good to know.
(We hear the backup horn of a truck and see through the window that the Mr. Bowmont has arrived.)
Monica: Ohh Oh, thats okay I hate when people come back to complement the chef. Like I have nothing better to do! So whats up?
Monica: Oh, good to see you too. Did you come down here to tell me that?
Richard: Okay thats fine, Ill walk away. And Ill never bother you again, but only if you tell me Chandlers willing to give you everything I am.
Monica: Well he is! Yeah, I mean marriage is all he talks about! My goodness, in fact, Im the one thats making him wait!
Rachel: Ohh I mean two best friends falling in love, how often does that happen?
Phoebe: Not that often!
Rachel: I mean Im probably 98% happy, maybe 2% jealous. And I mean whats 2%? Thats nothing.
Monica: So that marriage stuff that you were saying yesterday, you dont really believe that do you?
Chandler: Sure I do. In fact, I think the whole concept of marriage is unnatural. I mean look at pigs. Lets take a second here and look at pigs. Okay pigs dont mate for life. I mean a pig can have like a hundred sexual partners in a lifetime, and thats just an ordinary pig not even a pig thats good at sports!
Monica: Yeah, but thats pigs not people!
Rachel: Yeah, Im pretty confident about that. Thats what makes it so easy for me to be 80% happy for Monica and Chandler! It would be nice to have a little guarantee though.
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah I got that.
Phoebe: Yep, we shook on it. Yeah but believe me that is not how he wanted to seal the deal.
Monica: Its not like I want to get married tomorrow! Its just that I-Id like to believe that Im in a relationship thats actually going somewhere, that Im not just wasting my time!
Joey: Maybe thats the problem.
Monica: Is that some kind of boat talk?
Monica: Thats right.
Monica: You just told me that he hates marriage! That-that hes a-a complex fellow whos unlikely to take a wife! That-that hes against marriage and always will be!
Joey: You got that from what I said?!
Rachel: So what do you say we make a pact? If you and I are both single by the time were 40, we get married. I mean, we know each other, we like each other, and weve-weve already slept together so yknow therell be no surprises there! You know what I mean? No like, "Whats that?!"
Rachel: Phoebe?! Wait abut-but she just, she said that Joey was her backup.
Rachel: Ross! I just had a conversation with her, and she said that she and Joey made a deal!
Ross: Thats impossible! I mean we have had a deal for years! We-we-we shook on it, although believe me she wanted to do a lot more than that.
Chandler: Hes not supposed to ask my girlfriend to marry him! Im supposed to do that!
Joey: Let me know about that coconut phone, it might great for the boat.
Richard: Uh, no! No! Thats art! If it bothers you I can put my art out.
Monica: No thats, thats okay.
Monica: But getting over was the hardest thing that Ive ever had to do. And I never let myself think about you.
Rachel: Okay, yknow what?! I know-I know how to settle this! All right here, this is what were gonna do! Im gonna write Joey on one napkin (does so) and Im gonna right Ross on the other napkin (does so) and we are going to pick one! And that person is going to be our backup! Okay?
Joey: Okay thats fair.
Monica: Yknow, lets face it, Im not a kid anymore! I-I need to be with someone who-who wants the same things that I do! I mean coming to my place of work and telling me that you love me, I want that! Talking about pig sex over lunch, I dont want that!
Richard: I think thats fair.
Chandler: Nothing happened? Nothing? So you didnt tell my girlfriend that you love her?
Richard: Well, apparently Im willing to offer her things that you are not.
Chandler: But I am willing to offer her all those things. This was just a plan, yknow? A way to throw her off course so that when I offered her all these things, shed be surprised!
Richard: I know. (Pause) I hate that!
Joey: She was all crying. She-she said you guys want different things, and that and that she needed time to think.
Chandler: Okay! (He joins her on one knee) Okay! Okay! Oh God, I thought (Starting to cry, pauses) Wait a minute, I-I can do this. (Pause) I thought that it mattered what I said or where I said it. Then I realized the only thing that matters is that you, (Pause) you make me happier than I ever thought I could be. (Starting to cry again.) And if youll let me, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same way. (Pause as he gets out the ring.) Monica, will you marry me?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, its just Monica and Chandler dancing to Wonderful Tonight on the Slowhand album by Eric Clapton. And you can buy that album from the CFSI, just click on the CDNow link.]
Phoebe: Alright, okay, so we can all go now. That is fun. Hey, you know what? We all haven�t been together the six of us in such a long time.
Ross: No, no, it's okay. Really. They're plenty of people who just see their sisters at Thanksgiving and just see their college roommates at reunions and just see Joey at Burger King. So is, is that better?
Phoebe: I thought you knew that.
Phoebe: I cant. I cant. She dumped me, I mean I totally trusted her and then one day it was Okay, bye Pheebs gone. Y'know what the saddest part is, when we were playing together, that was like the most fun Ive ever had in like all my lives.
Joey: I suddenly had the feeling that I was falling. But I'm not.
Ross: Yeah. Do that for another two hours, you might be where I am right about now. (He enters.)
Rachel: Oh my God Phoebe! I mean Im justWait a minute. If Im your maid of honor that means you are Monicas.
Ross: Oh, hey y'know, they-they really overcharge you for that stuff. (Rachel glares at him.) But who cares?! Because it's all on me! (Rachel reaches into the fridge and pulls out two handfuls of those mini booze bottles.) (Watching her.) That is, one big drink!
The Interviewer: How do you spell that? So we can get it right.
PHOEBE: Please, I almost fell for that with, uh, Pride of the Yankees, I thought I was gonna see a film about Yankee pride and then, boom, the guy gets Lou Gehrig's disease.
Ross: Oh well, since I have that whole history with Rachel, I guess Phoebe.
Chandler: Well thats a full cup! (Pays him again.)
Ross: You wanna explain that?
Chandler: (to Monica) Is it okay that I want you to wear that head set in bed tonight?
Rachel: Right, yeah, I've heard that about cute doctors.
Rachel: Okay now Joey, y'know that since you're returning all of this stuff right after the audition you're gonna have to wear underwear?
Joey: That, is not a cat! {I have to agree with Joey on this one.}
Ross: Well that I can believe.
Rachel: Umm, our situation. Yknow umm, what we mean to each other. And I mean we-were having this baby together, and we live together. Isnt that, isnt that weird?
(Chandler seeing that Joey has his eyes closed sneaks over and picks up the chicken. The chicken starts flapping it's wings in protest as Chandler holds the chicken inches from Joey's face. Joey stops yelling and upon opening his eyes sees the chicken, screams, and falls to the ground in horror.)
Phoebe: That oughta do it.
Chandler: No-no-no, yknow what? I really shouldnt have said that you were embarrassing me, I mean that really wasnt cool. And if it makes you feel any better, Ive had a really lousy day.
Phoebe: You dont have to do that, Ross and Joey arent here, you can watch the parade if you want.
Phoebe: And I have your name and the fact that youre a drifter, so the balls pretty much in your court.
Chandler: Yeah I gotta say thank you, I was really nervous. Yknow Ive been told I come on to strong, make to many jokes, and then it was really hard to sidestep that duty thing. (The interviewer doesnt understand) Duties. (Still doesnt.) Duties! (Still doesnt.) Poo. (Still doesnt.)
Chandler: Well, either that or uh (Motions towards Joeys door.)
Joey: (enters) Guess what? (they all look expectantly at him) I finally got that seed out of my teeth.
Phoebe: Yeah, you mean like that youre kind of a loner.
Ross: (quietly) That would be nice.
Rachel: Now the filet mignon, what comes with that?
Joey: Yeah and the most important thing is that it wont be some like, stranger up there who barely knows you. Itll be me! And I swear Ill do a really good job. Plus, yknow I love you guys and-and it would really mean a lot to me.
Jessica Lockhart: (gasps) That was an accident! And so were you.
Monica: (she hugs Chandler) Honey, you've been really strong about this, I know how badly you wanted that job.
Ross: That tastes like feet!
Rachel: Youre supposed to realize that they are adults! And that they can make their own decisions.
PHOEBE: Phoebe, just watch that, I promise it will resotre all your faith in humanity.
Rachel: Okay, you're coming with me, and I also told them that if we're still here when they get off that we'll go down to the cafeteria and have some Jell-O with them.
Ross: Oh, hey, hey, I got that.
Monica: Well, of course I do. What's not to like! I'll take her in a minute! But, you know, I think that you're giving up too easy, honey. I think that you need to fight for her!
Phoebe: Wow, kids. Frank, are you sure youre ready for that?
Ross: No thats not what I want. Uh, Im glad you guys were bonding but I
Ross: Well, of course you can defend yourself from an attack you know is coming, thats not enough. Look, I studying kara-tay for a long time, and theres a concept you should really be familiar with. Its what the Japanese call (he holds two fingers up to his temple, and he does this every time he says this word) unagi.
CHANDLER: Yes, and this with the cigarette butt in it, is that decaf?
Joey: But Jos got a crush on Laurie. (Ross nods his head) Oh. You mean its like a girl-girl thing? Cause that is the one thing missing from The Shining.
Phoebe: Oh! Ooh! Oh, I didnt know that you did pot.
Phoebe: Oh, I wasnt even thinking about that.
(They all slowly turn around to reveal that they are giving themselves a facial.)
Chandler: Why not?! Id be thrilled if I heard that some hot girl was just looking to getoh I see.
Joey: Oh yeah, sure, that makes sense. Yeah. Cause you already told her you love her and she didnt say it back, then she called you and told you that theres another guy, so yeah, go to London thatll scare her!
Rachel: Oh. (we hear laughing from the upstairs apartment) Oh my God, is that Phoebe?
Monica: How are we gonna do that? Theres no way.
Joey: look I don't usually ask out women that I meet in coffeehouses
Chandler: Software that facilitates inter-business networking e-solutions?
Rachel: (on the phone) Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it! (Pause) Im telling you Im quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now! (Pause) Yes I am! (Pause) Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message. (Hangs up.)
Joey: Ew! What is that? Something exploded!
Ross: Listen, I know you wanted to talk to me, but I have an idea that may make you want to stay married. (Rachel shakes her head.) We register, and you get to keep all the presents!
Ross: Oh wow, yeah! See, I did not get that.
Guru Saj: I dont know, whats a koondis with you? (starts laughing as if that joke was funny, Ross only looks at him, and he stops) Please, lie down! Ive got a sav that oughta shrink that right up.
Phoebe: Oh yeah! Oh, I can do that.
Ross: What a great idea! That will get Rachel to forgive me!
Chandler: What about that circled one?
Gunther: Youre paying for that.
Joey: Okay, what do you have a fear of if you suffer from this phobia, Tris Holy cow, thats a big word. Trisc Seriously look at this thing. Chandler, how do you say that?
Joey: Wow! You realize that we've been throwing this ball, without dropping it, for like an hour?
Phoebe: Okay, so now they know that you know and they don't know that Rachel knows?
Ross: I just Bamboozled Chandler! (Flexes in victory while everyone stares at him.) Which is not uh sexual thing. That was a quick shower.
Ross: What difference does that make?!
Chandler: That was an obvious joke, and I didnt think of it. Why didnt I think of it? The source of all my powers. Oh dear God, what have I done!
Rachel: Oh my God! Yes, I would love that, oh, that is soo sweet, Joey.
Monica: That is not true!
Phoebe: It's a cotton swab with a bit of my saliva on it, so that if they perfect the cloning process while you are over there, you can use the DNA to create your own Pheebs!
Ross: Thats, thats, thats a big candy bar. (Shes holding one of those huge Toblerone bars.) I had the most amazing time with you.
Joey: Yes. It's just that she's so much smarter than all the girls I've ever dated! Combined! I don't want her to think I'm stupid!
Rachel: Yeah, well, word of advice: Bring back the comedian. Otherwise next time you're gonna find yourself sitting at home, listening to that album alone.
Rachel: You mean the one that youre wearing? (Adjusts Monicas pink bra strap as Monica looks down her shirt.)
Rachel: Oh my gosh! Oh wow! Oh, I know what this is! (Shes holding an item with a large suction cup connected to a yellow plastic box, with a long narrow tube and bottle connected the yellow part.) Wait a minute. That cant be right. Is that a beer bong for a baby?
Chandler: I cant even believe this! I really come off that badly?
Joey (staring at the cake): Uh.. is it ok that I still think it looks delicious?
Chandler: Im not freaking out. Why would I be freaking out? A woman named Heldi called and said we were getting married, but that happens everyday. (Does one of those Chandler noises.)
Monica: No, I just I think that its too soon.
Dr. Green: (on phone, not hearing her) theres gonna be a wedding! (Joey enters from his room and goes to get a beer from the fridge.) Thats unacceptable Rachel! What the hell does love have to do with it anyway?! There are more important things in a marriage other than love! (Joey hears something and looks around for the source.) constantly thinking about things! You have to think about the consequences of your decision. (Joey finds that the sound is coming from the phone and puts it to his ear.)
Ross: Yeah. And did you, did you pack that bathing suit?
Rachel: Okay. Ah, well well just see about that, okay. I will read The Shining, (she tries to take the book away from him but he doesnt want to let it go) and you will read Little Women.
Nurse: Yes, I see that here. Unfortunately we cant guarantee a private room and currently theyre all unavailable.
Emily: I realize that people are going to be disappointed. But, Im sure theyll come back when we can do it right.
Chandler: Joey if you wanna punch me, go ahead, I deserve it. But I just want you to know that I would never soberly hurt you or your family, youre my best friend. I would never do anything like this ever again.
Joey: Thats it?! Even if nobody helps me I can eat that no problem. At least give me a challenge!
Angela: That's because I'm wearing a dress that accents my boobs.
Chandler: Okay! You dont think I thought of that?
Chandler: (To Phoebe, behind Monica's back) Still terrified, I'll take care of it. No problem. (When Monica turns back he smiles and kisses her, when she turns away he nods that he'll do it to Phoebe.)
Chandler: Oh yeah, but don't worry. I don't think anybody's gonna focus on that as long as your wearing that towel dress.
Chandler: Well, look its been a really emotional time yknow, and youve had a lot to drink. And youve just got to let that go okay? I mean you were the most beautiful in the room tonight!
Dr. Li: Well, I believe that the answers lie in the osteological evidence. I plan to begin there.
Joey: Yeah, just a crush! Thats all this is! Its a crush! Im Joey; I dont get deep feelings.
Monica: That kid really kicked me hard on the plane.
Rachel: You should find out what his hobbies are and then use that to bond with him. Yeah! Like if I would strike up a conversation about say umm, sandwiches. Or uh, or my underwear.
Monica: (entering with Chandler) Who? (She looks out the window at Rosss apartment) Is that your sister?
Monica: (entering from bedroom) Okay, Ill be back in just a minute. Oh, Phoebe Im sorry that I left lipstick marks on the phone.
Rachel: Oh we were, but that was just a (pause as the audience reacts), I mean that was just a big drunken mistake.
Monica: You're not just saying that are you?