words in movies
Rachel: I cannot believe that you didnt tell me that we are still married!!
Gunther: Yeah, thats what I drive. I make four bucks an hour, I saved up for 350 years!
Joey: Well, I didnt realize until I got home. I wasnt gonna walk all the way back down here with one shoe! Yknow what? Im gonna go find that guys car and leave a note on the windshield. (Goes to do so.)
Monica: Oh my God, what a fun day! That sounds great!
Phoebe: (stops) Please! Please! Please! Please! Oh please! Please! Please! Frank and Alice asked me to baby sit the triplets and Im nervous cause Ive never done that before by myself!
Phoebe: What about me? I just found out that Denise is leaving town for a while, I dont have a roommate.
Rachel: That would be great! Wait, how long is Denise gone for?
Chandler: Little baby girl Chandler, where I have heard that before? Oh right, Coach Ruben. (Tries to get her to drink a little more from the bottle when he suddenly smells something. Its times like these Im glad Smell-O-Vision hasnt been invented.) Do you know what Pheebs? When youre done over there, we kinda have a situation over here too. (Phoebe is changing hers.)
Chandler: See thats where I think that youre wrong. Weve been playing these babies man for man; we should really be playing a zone defense.
Chandler: I just think that things would go a lot smoother if we each have our own zone. Phoebe, you can be in charge of wiping. And yknow Mon, you can be in charge of diapering and I can be in charge of looking how cute they are when they put their hands around (He degrades into baby talk, but he means when they grab his finger.)
Phoebe: That sounds really great, but maybe you should be in charge of wiping.
Joey: Hey babies! Oh, Im having the best morning. That uh, that Porsche Ive got the keys too, still there!
Joey: You should see the treatment I get when Im with that car! People are friendly; they-they wanna talk, and not just about the car! One guy gave me advice about my equity investments.
Joey: The ones that got me the Porsche! Will you keep up! (Chandler wipes his forehead with a baby wipe, that might have been used. He drops it disgustedly.) But I figured, if-if people keep seeing me just standing there, theyre gonna start to think that I dont own it. So I figured Ill wash it. Right? Monica, you got a bucket and some soap I can borrow?
Joey: And thats just in the city. I get her up to 160 when I take her upstate.
The Porsche Owner: Hey! Thats my car.
Monica: Yeah, two hours, a lifetime thats the same.
Monica: Chandler, what are you doing? That thing can put someones eye out!
Chandler: He can do more than that! He can destroy the universe!
Phoebe: No Chandler, they can swallow one of those little parts! And also, look at his smooth area, thats just gonna mess them up.
Phoebe: Oh, I can still do that.
Phoebe: How did that happen?!!
Chandler: Well, I was trying to prove that I was right. Yknow? And it turns out I was wrong. And now its lodged in my throat. (Mimics a cat trying to cough up a hairball.) (He does it again.)
Judge: So based on your petition you are seeking an annulment on the grounds that Mr. Geller is mentally unstable.
Judge: And based on the fact that Mr. Geller is intravenous drug user.
Judge: Now it also says here that you lied about your sexual preference before marriage?
Judge: And finally that you were unable to consummate the marriage. Well, that makes sense since youre gay and addicted to heroin.
Judge: That wont be necessary.
Judge: Now if you were two involved in a serious relationship, that really creates a problem.
Judge: Is there, anything in this record that is actually true?
Ross: (stands up) Thats great! Are you happy now? Look what you did with your funny, funny form!
Ross: And what(notices the stenographer is still typing)What are you typing that for? Did you hear what she said? We dont get the annulment. Dont type that! What?! Stop typing! (He goes over to where the stenographer is typing and in the process pushes Rachel out of his way.) Hey! Stop typing! (Hes still typing.) Stop typing! Stop typing!!
Chandler: That is true.
Monica: All right, thats it, were going to the emergency room.
Chandler: I think thats gum.
Joey: Why isnt that valet back with my Porsche?
Ross: That was the only way I could get him to stop typing!
Rachel: Dont call us that! (Storms away)
Phoebe: Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right? Okay, Im gonna take that spit bubble as, "Yeah, I do!" Okay, after I get rid of this dirty diaper Leslie, Ill set you up with a clean one. (She throws it at the garbage without looking, misses, and knocks over a vase and flowers, which fall to the floor and break.) Okay, Im sorry. I didnt mean to scare you. I just have to clean that up. Okay? Cause lets face it, were at Monicas. (She crawls over, disposes of the diaper, picks up the flowers, and the vase.) I broke it. All right. Well, thats just the way that goes. (She throws out both the flowers and the vase.) Okay, good. (She turns around and only counts two babies.) Why are there only two of you? Where is Leslie? Well, you cant answer. (She starts looking for her) Leslie? Where are you Leslie? Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words! (She turns around and finds that Leslie has managed to crawl into the bottom drawer of the TV cabinet.) Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh! (She picks her up and notices a surprise is waiting in the drawer.) Oh, youre a lot mischievous! Well, itll dry. (Closes the drawer with her foot.) (To Leslie) Okay, you sit with your brother and sister nowwho arent there! (They both have disappeared as well.)
Chandler: Well, lets just say that Krog will be fully equipped to destroy the universe again in twelve to fourteen hours.
Chandler: Is not as important as the fact that Phoebe took care of the babies all by herself.
Monica: Youre right, youre right I shouldnt freak out. Cause this is what will happen when you and I have babies! When will that be?!
Rachel: Oh, little Xs! Great! That makes up for everything!
Rachel: Oh, name one stupid thing that is as stupid as this one!
Rachel: Hey! Wait a minute! That was different! I did those things because I was in love with you!
Ross: Youre right. Thats very different. So lets, lets just sign the papers. All right? (Sits down and Rachel keeps standing there.) What?
Rachel: I know. I always thought if you and I got married, it would be the one that stuck. And it wouldnt be a secret, and we wouldnt have our wedding dinner at Pizza Hut. (They both laugh.)
Ross: That may be the most depressing thing Ive heard in my life. I should probably get these to my lawyers office.
Joey: Id love to show ya, but I just tucked her in. Shes sleeping. (The women both laugh) Hey uh, would you two girls like to go for a drink? (Just then the same guy with the football dives to make a catch, lands on the car cover, and collapses it. It turns out that Joey set up a bunch of boxes to make it look like a Porsche.)
Ross: Oh! Wow! Uh, yeah! That sounds great. Im just gonna put this (The money) back in my pocket, pretend that didnt happen. Uh yeah, actually Im free now. Do you wanna grab some coffee or
Mrs. Green: Thats true. You do have another child.
Chandler: That means nothing to me. (To Ross) Come on!
Rachel: Oh no, I'm good, I don't wanna get that turkey smell all over my hands.
CHANDLER: Hey, listen.� I'm never going to lie to you again, okay?� And I want you to know that nobody thinks you're stupid.
Joey: My Giant? I love that movie!
Monica: Wow! Play that message for Emily and this whole problem goes away!
Phoebe: And so engaged. (Points to the ring that Rachel is wearing.)
Mike: Woo-wo-hey-hey-hey... Can we not talk about that right now?
Joey: No! No, that was Jack! Rachel thinks I asked her to marry me!
(Joey gestures to show that he wouldn't dare...)
Rachel: And stop saying that! I hate that!
Ross: Dad seriously! Yknow you really should see someone about that!
Rachel: Well, let's see. There was a really big guy that I was talking to, with the really nice breasts...
Rachel: No, Im just kidding I would never do that to you! Okay, everybody, its trifle time!
Chandler: Isnt that what happened with you and the brides maid?
Monica: I cant believe this. Do you think that your parents could help pay for it?
Joey: (pointing to the TV) Okay, Ross, look-look-look-look, look right here. Thats called a scrum, okay? Its kinda like a huddle.
Rachel: Okay great, hold on a sec! (She runs to her room and returns carrying a huge bag of laundry.) Oh, here you go! You don't mind do ya? That would really help me out a lot! Thanks!
Ross: Women tell each other everything. Did you know that?
Joey: There’s a part in a TV movie that I would be perfect for and I didn’t even be put up for it! She’d better have a good reason.
Joey: So uh, hey, that uh, that wedding ring, huh? Man, thats nice!
Ross: Oh my God. Ohh, my little sister and my best friend shaking up. Oh, thats great. Thats great. (Kisses and hugs her.)
SUSAN: Is your finger caught in that chair?
Monica: Why?! Why? Why, why would anybody do something like that?
Danny: Stop saying that. I hate that.
Chandler: Yeah, and not that you would, but I wouldnt hang out with all the guys in my office.
ROSS: Wow!� (pause)� Wow, You look . . . uh . . .�� It's just, ah . . .�� That dress . . . uh . . .�
Joey: Aww, I don't want to see that!
Joey: You can't just give up! Is that what a dinosaur would do?
Phoebe: Oh wow. What, do you think maybe hes gonna tell you that hes gay?
Ross: Can you please not do that feet first? You know where his injury is! Severed toe, you just said it!
Phoebe: No, no, no, I wouldnt do you myself, I mean that would be weird. Yeah, no, Ill get one of the other girls to do it. Oh, this will be so much fun! Hey! Are you excited?
Chandler: Well, don't we look nice all dressed up?...It's stuff like that, isn't it?
Phoebe: Well, Im going to the dentist, so listen, okay, just be on the look out for anything that, that, that you can fall into, or, or that can fall on you, or... All right, just look out! Okay, And um, I also just wanna, I just wanna tell you all that um...... (starts to cry and runs out)
CHANDLER: Well, invisible kids can be that way sometimes.
Chandler: Oh, dont thank me, thank the jerk that never showed up. Okay, I gotta get to get to work.
Rachel: (in disbelief) You WHAT? And I missed it? Because I was giving a makeover to that stupid hippie?
Chandler: (showing her the pictures) Heres a picture of Ross. (Shows another one.) And thats me. (Another one.) And thats me and Ross. (Another one.) Oh-ho, that is a picture of our first kiss as a married couple.
MONICA: That would be the work of a Blowfish.
Phoebe: Not that way! But the bike brought you a lot closer!
Monica: Oh thats so sweet! Look Chandler I dont care if you cant cry, I love you.
Phoebe: Oh yeah well, Im sorry about that too, but what are you going to do?
[Scene: Petes office, he is participating in a conference call with three other employees, each of whom are on a different TV screen that he controls with a remote.]
Phoebe: Why, do I have a feeling thats not as happy as it sounds? (Joey points out one going into the chipper to her, as this haunty, demonic music starts to play in the background) No! Nooooo!!! (she winces in horror and hides her face against Joeys shoulder, as she sees the tree spit out from the chipper.)
Ross: Uh, huh. Yeah, right after I thank everyone for giving money to the museum, I sing a song about the wonder that is Joey.
Phoebe: Thats not Ralph Lauren. Sounds like him though.
Rachel: Jo-Joey, look honey we-we need to talk okay? Umm, I kinda got the feeling from her today that uh, shes not lookin for a serious relationship.
Ross: That cup is mine!
Joey: Good-good, okay, sprinkle some of that on your legs, it'll absorb some of the moisture and then you can get your pants back up.
Ross: Hey... I made up that joke and told it to you! (He points at Chandler. Joey gestures to Ross "What are you doing?)
Phoebe: Oh! Get off!! Ow!! Oh, stop it!! Why?! Why are you doing that to me?!
Rachel: Am I the only one who doesn't think that she's hot? Ross?
Ross: (to Elizabeth) And that is why we cannot see each other anymore.
Phoebe: OK so isn't there a little part of you that wants to get up there?
Phoebe: Oh you�ll probably take care of that on your hands.
[Scene: Central Perk, the gang's all there. Ross has a slip of paper that he throws on the ground tying to get Rachel's attention.]
Phoebe: Yeah... ooh... wow... Even started to think I'd never meet someone that, you know, I wanted to... do this with. Here you go. (Both Phoebe and Mike look really proud.)
Rachel: All right honey, we'd better go if we wanna catch that movie.
Monica: Chandler, look I-I know that your dad embarrassed you. I know
Rachel: Oh, thank God I can't hear a word that you're saying!
Rachel: Yeah I know, but one of them just said that she loved me so I just gave her everything.
Monica: A jazz trio for cocktails. The Bay City Rollers for dancing. Wait, that was from my sixth grade wedding.
Emily: and that was all before 10 oclock. The caterer rang and said it was going to be Chicken Kiev instead of Chicken Tarragon. And then the florist phoned to say there arent any tulips. Oh, and the chilliest has carpel-tunel syndrome. Were not gonna be
Ross: Joshua guy at that club, dancing and having a good time, the thought of it kinda yknow.
Ross: Oh, okay, yknow what this is? This is a difference of opinion. And when that happens in a marriage...
Joey: That is incredible! You are the master!
Rachel: Yes, and I know that youd say no if he asked you, but Im sorry; how great would you look walking down the aisle in this Donna Carin. (shows her the picture.)
Phoebe: Oh.Okay, then it gets worse, 'cause then I told him that I would see him tomorrow night.
Ross: Im not going to do that. (Rachel glares at him.)
Rachel: Funny, because I was just gonna go across the hall and write that on Chandler.
Joey: Oh, were supposed to just get him a ticket?! That guy is always mooching off of us!
Chandler: Well, maybe it was the kind of food that tasted good at first but then made everybody vomit and have diarrhea.
Tag: Thats it. Thats my whole name.
Phoebe: Thats a dog, every house should have a dog.
JOEY: What? You think I'm too dumb to understand that a husband needs to be with his wife?� Huh?� Do you think I'm like, "Duh."� (He strikes himself in the head with the bat.� He stands dazed for a moment.)
Phoebe: Well, all right. 1700 bags of peanuts flying that high, thats pretty amazing too.
Mr. Geller: Oh my God, does she really thinks that?
Ross: Well, I know the other day in the coffeehouse you were caught up in the whole soccer mom thing? but is that really you? I mean can you honestly picture yourself in a Volvo?
Monica: Oh wait, you know what, I got it, I got it, pretend like you just woke up, okay, that will throw her off. Be sleepy.
Joey: Check it out. (He turns around, pulls down his pants, and shows Phoebe that hes got panties on.) How much of a man am I?!
(As they change places, they give each other the now patented Ross maneuver. If you dont know what that means, click here to find out The One With Joey's New Girlfriend.)
Monica: Oh, come on its my wedding! That can be my present.
Phoebe: Aw! Hey, do you think that Susan person is her lover?
Chandler: That is amazing.
Liam: (puts his arm around her) Well, actually the last time you and I saw each other was that morning.
Monica: What?! I mean, I didn't work this hard and-and-and lose all this weight so that I can give my flower to someone like him!
Monica: Do you realize that four weeks from today were getting married? Four weeks baby!! Four weeks!!!
Monica: How do you do that?
Rachel: Well, someone was supposed to write "Rach, take down the lights" and put it on the re... frigerate... (finally noticing Monicas note stuck to the refrigerator) How long has that been there?
Monica: Oh, is it that pinball machine with the big bow on it?
Phoebe: Okay, well I think that they're in my purse. Why don't you go get dressed and I'll look for them.
Joey: Okay Rach, that muffin and espresso, $4.50. Ross, double latte, $2.75. Chandler, coffee and a scone, $4.25. And Pheebs, herbal tea, $1.25. So, all together thats (pauses to figure the total) $12.75.
Chandler: Whoah whoah, back up there, Sparky. What'd you mean by that?
Fake Monica: So once they caught on to the fact that we're, y'know, short and have breasts...
Minister: May I have the rings? (He is given the rings) Emily, place this ring on Rosss finger as a symbol of your bond everlasting. (She jams the ring onto his finger) Ross, place this ring in Emilys hand as a symbol of the love that encircles you forever.
Kyle: we talked through most of the night and we realized that the reason we were so angry at each other was because there are still feelings there. So (Pause)
Emily: I still cant believe theyre tearing it down. It really is the most lovely building youll ever see. I mean its over (She stops suddenly, when she sees that demolition has already started.) Oh my God!
Rachel: Monica...would you please tell Joey that he is a pig?
Monica: There's something that we wanna tell you. We decided to name the girl-baby Erica.