words in movies
Chandler: That's not what I had in mind! See, people like Ross don't generally wear these types of pants. You see, they're very tight. (Motions to Ross's buttock.) Maybe there's something in that area.
Ross: Oh see, I-I needed a new thing for today and there's this leather store that always smells so good and I thought to myself, "Wow, (To Chandler) I never really owned a good smelling pair of pants before."
Joey: (looking in the Yellow Pages) Look, maybe I need to try a real teacher! Right here! Here! Andy Cooper, he teaches guitar and look ooh, there's a nice picture of him with a little kid and THE KID'S GOT A GUITAR!!!!!! (Storms out.)
[Both run back in their apartment. There's a knock at the door.]
Joey: Noooo, that's what I was wearing when I donated. I'm kinda surprised there's any of my boys left.
Phoebe: Umm, no, it's a purse. And there's a thermos in it.
Ross: The gas is odorless, but they add the smell so you know when there's a leak.
David: Uhm... uhm... Goodbye... Uh... Schto ya ztez vigul... ui... (David holds his hands gently on the back of Phoebe's neck. There's a sound of a a bunch of keys rattling, and the door opens... It's Mike)
Monica: Umm, listen there's something I think you should know.
{There's another continuity error here. Before Monica says I love you, Chandler's holding the vests so that you couldn't see the collar, you could see all three, and they were folding nicely. After she says the line and the camera cuts back to Chandler, you can only see two out of the three, you can see the collar of the top one, and it looks like it was folded sloppily, unlike before. Hey, you notice things while spending this much time on this!}
MONICA: Ok, everybody, there's food and drinks on the table. Go across the hall.
(There's another pause as Ross gets angry again.)
Phoebe: Yeah, it's Y'know there'sno you may not!
JOEY: Yeah, there's just one thing that might be kind've a problem. See, I, uh, had to kiss this guy.
Ross: No, it's just...you know the whole "getting on with your life" thing. Well, do I have to? I mean, I'm sitting here with this cute woman, and, and, and she's perfectly nice, and, but that there's, that's it. And um, and then I'm here talkin' to you, and, and it's easy, and it's fun, and, and I don't, I don't have to...You know, here's a wacky thought. Um, what's say you and I give it another shot? No no no, I know what you're gonna say, you're a lesbian. But what do you say we just put that aside for now you know? Let's just stick a pin in it, ok? Because, we're great together, you know. You can't deny it. Besides, you're carrying my baby. I mean, how perfect is that? But see, you know, you keep sayin' that, but there's somethin' right here. I love you.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, he's unpacking after moving in. There's a knock on the door and he answers it.]
Phoebe: Oh, well, see, there's this guy she met at the...
[they pull out the box of condoms but there's only one left]
CHANDLER: Wow, there's my fantasy come true. No, seriously.
Man: For God's sake, will you let it go? There's no Rachel!
(There's a brief pause.)
Rachel: No, she left a message. (He starts for the machine.) (Stopping him.) But it-it kinda got erased. There's just (Pause) something wrong with your machine.
Ross: Oh! And it gets worse! (Turns his side to Chandler and Monica and pulls up his shirt. There's a distinct line across his body, where his belly is very tanned and his back is very pale.)
Rachel: Okay, what? What is too sensitive? (There's music coming from the living room. Ross opens the door to the living room and he and Rachel see Sandy play a song for Emma on his recorder. Rachel is moved by this, but Ross only sees his point proven again, and walks back into the kitchen, angrily. The door he was holding, swings back and hits Rachel.)
ROSS: Well, uh, for your information, there's a woman at the museum, who's curator of moths and other... uh... winged things... who's, uh, let it be known that she is drawn to me much like a... well, you know. But so far I've been keeping her at bay, but, uh, if this is the deal...
(There's a knock on the door and Monica answers it.)
Chandler: Okay. You have to stop the Q-tip when there's resistance!
Monica: (on phone) Could you please tell me what this is in reference to? (Listens) Yes, hold on. (To Rachel) Um, they say there's been some unusual activity on your account.
FRANK: Yeah, he loved stilts. One time I was upstairs, I was stealing cigarettes out of my mom's purse, and uh, all of a sudden I look over and there's my dad's head bobbing past the window. He just had this big smile on his face and he was waving 'cause he was always happiest when he was on his stilts.
Phoebe: But there's a whole table of mini-muffin baskets. Which one did you send?
Ross: I know, uh, the air, the-the trees... even though Nana's gone there's, there's something almost, uh- I dunno, almost life-aff- (Not looking where he is going he falls into an open grave)
Chandler: ...Well, y'know, part of me wants that, but it's like I'm two guys, y'know? I mean, one guy's going 'Shut up! This is great!' But there's this other guy. Actually it's the same guy that wells up every time that Grinch's heart grows three sizes and breaks that measuring device... And he's saying, y'know, 'This is too hard! Get out! Get out!'
EDDIE: I got a little surprise, look. There's a new fishie. I named him uh, Chandler, you know, after, after you.
PHOEBE: And um, and there's actually a, a woman?
Ross: I can't believe I'm about to meet Benjamin Hobart. I've always thought of him as one of the people I'd invite to my fantasy dinner party. Do you think there's any chance he'll bring Christie Brinkley or C3PO?
Joey: (in a sexy voice) Yep! There's always room for Jell-O
Joey: Hey, I don't need violence to enjoy a movie. Just so long as there's a little nudity.
Phoebe: Well, there's a spot open for only one groomsman and you have to choose between Ross and Chandler. So good luck with that.
Monica: There's nothing we can do. You erased the message!
Joey: Let's just say there's a well-dressed pack of dogs in Ohio. Hey Monica listen is-is Phoebe there? I gotta ask her something about the car.
(There's the next bell, and the correct answer. The screen changes to "4 to win" and "things that burn". Gene now realizes that he got two correct answers and gets up in his seat.)
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. The table is set, and there's food on the tables again. They're all there, toasting.]
Phoebe: (looking out the window) Oh, look! There's Monica and Chandler! (Starts yelling.) Hey! Hey, you guys! Hey! (Chandler and Monica start taking each other's clothes off.) Ohh!! Ohh! Ahh-ahhh!!
Monica: There's a pregnant woman in Ohio, and she picked us!
Phoebe: Y'know, there's gonna be lots of other stuff.
(There's a pause as they figure out what to say.)
Agency guy: So, these are the preliminary forms for an open adoption. There's a lot to go over, but I'll explain everything as we go through it.
Ross: She was blonde? (he looks surprised for a while, but then gets a "gotcha" expression on his face... There's knocking at the door.) Just a sec.! Okay, okay. This one's name is Sandy. She's got a degree in early childhood education, uhm... she worked for her last family for three years.
Ross: Wait a minute, there's two sets of nozzles, which one is it?
Roy: Ooh, boy. You should warn people there's no elevator! I should not have had that Mexican food for lunch.
Ross: So weird to see all these people again... Oh my God, look, there's Geoffrey Cleric.
Phoebe: Maybe there's someone else.
(There's a knock on the door, Chandler opens it, and silently hands back the cushion.)
JOEY: There's my scene, there's my scene. [Joey on tv] "Mrs. Wallace, I'm Dr. Drake Ramoray, your sister's neurosurgeon.
Monica: Phoebe, there's a dog sitting on my couch!
Phoebe: No, there's no dog here?
Ross: Alright, ok, let's do it. (Ross sits down at the desk and they all gather around him) Uhm, I know we start by discussing the shortcomings of carbon dating... uhm, and then, then I move on to what is clearly the defining moment of the Mesozoic era, the breakup of Pangea, hello! (Rachel and Joey look confused) And then, there's the... eh... there's the overview of the Triassic.
Joey: Oh, you said it Mike. (Rips open the carton and spills milk on the counter) Aw! There's got to be a better way!
Chandler: There's no-one around. Why don't we just take this one?
[Scene: The apartment in the listing, the guys are checking it out. There's one problem though, it's roughly the size of this computer screen. As they enter Joey lets out a whistle.]
Ross: Oh man! I want that place so much!! I was so sure that was gonna work! There's twelve bucks I'll never see again! (Exits.)
Monica: There's nothing to tell! He's just some guy I work with!
Chandler: No, I know, but it's just so hard, you know? I mean, you're sitting there with her, she has no idea what's happening, and then you finally get up the courage to do it, and there's the horrible awkward moment when you've handed her the note.
Lizzie: What? (She opens the envelope Phoebe has given her.) Oh my God, there's really money in here.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is prying at the Magic 8 Ball with a screwdriver as there's a knock on his door which he goes to answer.]
CHANDLER: Hear me out woman.� I'll go down the fire escape.� Then, I'll wait for a while.� Then, when I come up the stairs, it'll be just like I just got back from Tulsa.� Then, Joey and I will come in and see that there's no guy in here.
Monica: (as Rachel) Hi, Dad. No, no, it's me. (Getting up to move further away from Rachel) li-listen, Dad, I can't talk right now, um, but there's something, um... there's something that I've been meaning to tell you...
[Scene: Richard's apartment. There's a knock on the door.The listing agent opens the door for Chandler and Joey.]
Rachel: (jumps at the chance to make that happen) Oh! There's nothing above your bed!!
Chandler: There's a tape here with Monica's name on it.
Rachel: When I saw him get off that plane with her, I really thought I hit rock bottom. But today, it's like there's rock bottom, 50 feet of crap, then me.
[there's a loud bang at the door so Ross opens it back up to find a shoe has been thrown at it]
(There's booing around them, and Mike sinks in his chair, holding his hand in above his eyes, hoping no-one would recognize him)
PHOEBE: Ok, Ross, could you just open your mind like this much, ok? Wasn't there a time when the brightest minds in the world believed that the world was flat? And, up until like what, 50 years ago, you all thought the atom was the smallest thing, until you split it open, and this like, whole mess of crap came out. Now, are you telling me that you are so unbelievably arrogant that you can't admit that there's a teeny tiny possibility that you could be wrong about this?
ROSS: No, you, ya know there's no need to make it u. . . how?
RACHEL: (after a pause with everyone staring at her, she goes up to the microphone) Ya, know what Barr, I'm not gonna leave. I probably should, but I'm not, see 'cause I promised myself that I would make it through at least *one* of your weddings (da-doom-chesh). See now, tonight, all I really wanted was to make it though this evening with a little bit of grace and dignity. Well (laughing), I guess we can all agree that's not gonna happen. There's nothing really left to say except....(starts singing) "Her name was Lola. She was a showgirl. With yellow feathers (band joins in), feathers in her hair, and a dress cut down to there. She would..."
Chandler: Oh no..don't thank me. Thank you. You know there's not one thing I would change about you? Not one single thing! And definitely not... two... single things.
Ross: no, no, no there's nothing wrong with you I mean you don't strike me as the type of person that wants to get married anyway.
Chandler: Okay, there's something different though--Oh my God! You smoked!
Rachel: Okay. Uhh, Ross, y'know what, there's something that I-that I have to talk to you about and everybody's saying that I shouldn't tell you, but I think they're wrong. I mean, and you know how people can be wrong.
Chandler: Ethan? There's, there's an Ethan?
Joey: Ooh ooh ooh ooh, there's no room for milk!
(There's a knock on the door.)
MONICA: My brother, the PhD would like to know if there's any way to treat this orally.
MICH: Well, you know, there's no one way really, it's just, you know, whatever it takes so that you can finally say to him, "I'm over you."
Joey: (gets up) All right. Don't look at my list, Ross, 'cause there's a lot on there that you don't have.
RACHEL: Oh my God, look there's Roy Gublik.
Chandler: Well, I guess there's nothing left for us to do but-but kiss.
Ross: I'll do it. Hey, whatever you need me to do, I'm your man. (He starts to sit down on the bed. There's one problem though, he's about two feet to the left of it. Needless to say, he misses and falls on his butt.) (Looking up at Joey.) Whoa-oh-whoa! Are you, are you okay?
RACHEL: Mom, would you relax. That was 10 blocks from here and, the, the woman was walking alone at night, I would never do that. Mom, c'mon, stop worrying. This is a safe street, this is a safe building, there's nothing [a pigeon flies in the window and lands on the table] OH MY GOOOD, oh my God, oh I gotta go, I gotta go, I gotta go. [hangs up] OK, that's fine, you just read the paper, I'm gonna get a pot, it's not for you. [grabs a pot and lid] OK, that's fine, read the Family Circus, enjoy the gentle comedy. [puts pot over the pigeon] Aaahh, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, aaaaahh. [knock at the door] It's open you guys.
Phoebe: (playing guitar and singing) And there's a country called Argentinaaaa, it's a place I've never seeeeen. But I'm told for fifty pesos you can buy a human spleen. Humaaan spleeeeen. Olè!
Rachel: I know, isn't he great? It's so nice to finally be in a fun relationship, y'know? There's nothing boring about him, and ah, I bet he's never set foot in a museum.
Chandler: Well, wait there's, there's more. See the contact paper is to go into your brand new drawer. (gives her a drawer) See, the drawer actually goes in my dresser.
ROSS: Well, there's this, uh, paleontology conference in L.A. so I figured I'd go and then drive down to the zoo and surprise Marcel.
JOEY: Ah, I was just in the bathroom, and there's mirrors on both sides of you. So when you're in there it's like you're peein' with the Rockettes.
Phoebe: Oh, thank God, 'cause that thing's really creepy! (looking outside the window) Look, there's Chandler. (he's on the street, talking to a woman)
Ross: Ok, well, uh, I can maybe grab a sleeping bag, or...(There's one of those moments. They're staring at each other, no word uttered, and then she leans toward him in order to kiss him, but he ducks and avoids her more than once.) Oh, oh. (he then hugs her and when she tries to kiss him again, he stands up and she falls down on the bed). No, Rach! I'm sorry, I just don't think this, this, this is a good idea.
Phoebe: There's your movie! <claps>
Chandler: You mean there's more than one of us.
CHANDLER: There's nobody here Joe.
Chandler: Honey, there's really nothing to worry about.
Waiter: Uh, there's a drunk Chinese guy.
Judy: (to Monica) I remember your first birthday! Ross was jealous of all the attention we were giving you. He pulled on his testicles so hard! We had to take him to the emergency room! Ross: (pointing the camcorder at himself) There's something you didn't know about your dad!