words in movies
OPENING TITLES [Scene: Monica and Rachels apartment. The whole gang is there.]
PHOEBE: Oh, I don't know. Umm, how about the fact that the underwear out there on the telephone pole is yours from when you were having sex with Fun Bobby out on the terrace.
PHOEBE: Yeah, is there a hair on it?
ROSS: You know, you are so amazing, is there anything you, you don't know?
[Scene: Central Perk close to closing. Ross and Julie are still there. Rachel is cleaning tables.]
RACHEL: Let me tell you something. As a woman there is nothing sexier than a man who does not want to have sex.
JULIE: So is there like a story or do they just stard doing it right. . . oh, never mind.
JOEY: Thank you. Wait wait wait wait, you see me again. Hang on, the guy's butt's blockin' me. There I am, there I am, there I am, there I am, there I am. . .
DUNCAN: Well, I've never told you this but, there were one or two times, back in college, when I'd get really drunk, go to a straight bar and wake up with a woman next to me. But I, I, I told myself it was the liquor and e-everyone experiments in college.
MONICA: You know, it still smells like monkey in there.
Doug: There you go. (smacks him on the butt)
[Scene: Ross's apartment. Ross is setting up for his time with Marcel. Joey is there.]
Phoebe: Yeah! And look, (Grabs the pants) see how they expand as the baby grows? (Theres a stretchy part in front.) And then after the babys born, theyre great for shoplifting melons.
Joey: Nope. Op, wait! There he goes.
ROSS: There was never a good time.
Rachel: Okay, thank you. Thatll be all. (The mail guy leaves and Tag starts to follow, but Rachel stops him.) (Excitedly) Wait! Wait! (Rushes over and closes the office-door.) Did you see that? That mail guy had no idea there was something going on between us. (They kiss.)
Gunther: Ill be there.
Pete: So ah, there was this thing I wanted to talk to you about.
Phoebe Sr: Uh-huh. Wow! Well, look! Theres Frank. (points to the picture.)
Rachel: What?! You mean theyre not coming to a social event where theres no men and theres no booze?! Thats shocking! I dont care, as long as my moms here.
Joey: Aww, there we go.
Joey: Wow! Theres a lot I didnt know about vomit. (The duck comes to the door of the bathroom, quacking.) (To the duck) In a minute. (The duck goes back into the bathroom.)
Joey: Oh thats right. Theres a lot going on here and I think I ate some bad fruit earlier.
Rachel: Yeah, but it was different with him today! And he wasn't, like, Orthodontist Guy, y'know? I mean, we had fun! Is there anything wrong with that?
Rachel: Oh! Yay! Look! Theres a piece that doesnt have floor on it!
Monica: (thinks about it) All right, but if-if he lights someone else on fire he is out of there!
Chandler: No. Is there anyway, anyway you think hell understand this?
Phoebe: Okay but thats why you have to buy it, so it can fulfil its Christmas destiny, otherwise there gonna throw it into the chipper. Tell him, Joey
Monica: Get in there man! Flirt back, mix it up!
Rachel: No. I have got to get ready and go to a dinner at my bosses house. Its a very big deal, theres a lot of people there I have to meet.
[Cut to Monica and Rachels, theyre all there playing cards.]
Phoebe: Thank you. (To Gunther, who's standing there frozen) Okay, go! Go! Go! (He runs off.) (To Larry) Now, if after dinner you still really need to bust someone, I know a hot dog vendor who picks his nose.
Joey: Hey Ross, listen, you want anything to drink, cause Im heading up there.
Dr. Schiff: Im sorry, is there something going on here?
Chandler: (entering, happily, with a bottle of champagne, thinking that Monica is the only one there) Ha-ha-ha-(sees everyone)-enh-enh. I'm so glad you guys are all here! My office finally got wrinkle free fax paper!
Ross: No, I cant. I would, I really would, but my son is here; I cant leave him. Isntyou dont think theres any way?
Chandler: All right, theres a nuclear holocaust, Im the last man on Earth. Would you go out with me?
Chandler: Well, why don't you send her a musical bug, op, no you already did that. All right look, you're going to have to go there yourself now, okay, make a few surprise visits.
Jennifer: Lisas laugh though TheresIts so infectious. Its one of those things just forget about it. Once it starts, its all gone.
CHANDLER: Ok, there is one more way to say it, who knows it?
Ross: (sexily) Yes there will. (Mona leaves and Ross tries to find the same table.) Oh guess what, Molly Gilbert youve just been bumped up to table one. And if its all right with you Im gonna take your place at table sixMartin Clickclocken.
Ross: Hi, um, Im err, (has to clear his throat) Im Ross Geller, and err ah... (pats Carols bulge) ..thats, thats my boy in there, and uh, (points) this is Carol Willick, and this... is Susan Bunch. Susan is um Carols, just, com... (embarrassment finally overwhelms the poor fellow, who becomes incoherent until) ..whos next?
Rachel: (sticks her head out too) Well, get back in there and talk!
JOEY: Are you naked in there?
Monica: Y'know go! Go! Right there! (Points)
Phoebe: Oh weird, Chandler just told us he's got a conference there!
Chandler: I cant believe there is a naked hooker in there!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is entering, Phoebe is already there waiting for the delievery guy.]
Chandler: Y'know what? You should go to my guy, because when I went in there with my third nipple. He just lopped it right off. Y'know? So I guess I'm lucky. I mean not as lucky as people who were born with two nipples.
(Theres a knock on the door.)
Joey: Huh. Interesting. Now there are obstacles. Hot nanny and me against the world. This is the kind of stuff great novels are made of.
Rachel: Handling it? What do you mean, handling it? Theres nothing to handle. Now, maybe I would have a problem with this if it wasnt for me and Joshua. Yknow, theyre not gonna get married anyway!
Ross: Okay, theres this guy, Warren, from the museum and hes going on a dig for like two years and hes got this great place he needs to sublet. So uh, you interested?
Joey: Oh, see thats where youre wrong. Whatever it is I can do it. And if didnt see it up there, just-just try me.
Phoebe: Okay (walks out and closes the door behind her, looks up and whispers) If you guys have microphones in there too, I didn't mean any of that. I love you.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Monica are there as Joey enters.]
Ross: Aw, we-we are so (Motions that theyre connected.) So umm, well I-I-I like you and I-I love umm, yknow hanging out with you. And I mean-Im having a lot of fun. (He pauses and thinks there might be more, but decides there isnt.)
Hitchhiker: Wait! Wait! There is the train station!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there as Monica enters.]
Monica: Okay! Okay, let's race! First one there wins! Ha-ha! (Runs out the door and everyone watches her leave.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Chandler is there talking to the chick and duck.]
Barry: (answering the intercom) Be right there. (To Robbie and Rachel) Be back in a sec.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel, and Phoebe are there.]
Charlton Heston: I dont know one actor worth his salt that didnt say at one time or another, "God, I stink!" Hell, I just did a scene out there, first take, I stunk the place up. But, the important thing you must remember, no matter how badly you think you might stink, you must never, ever bust into my dressing room and use my shower! Do you understand me?!
Rachel: Well theres an idea!!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Phoebe are there. Monica is suggesting Mockolate recipes to Phoebe.]
Monica: There you go!
Chandler: There you are.
MONICA: Hi. Uh, we'll be right there, we're just trying to decide something. [shuts the bathroom door]
Phoebe: (to her) Hey! Dont you give me any of yourHey! (Sees Chandler and Monica standing there.)
[Scene: Rosss apartment, Rachel is packing what she still has over there as Ross enters.]
Emily: You were amazing out there.
Monica: Yknow, in my defense, umm there was no glitter on the macaroni and very little glue.
Chandler: Now, theres two reasons.
Monica: So guys, listen, I go over there, and umm...
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. The table is set, and there's food on the tables again. They're all there, toasting.]
[Scene: Phoebes Herbal Guys office, Ross is there about his thing. Ross is looking around the exam room, and he goes over to a large bank of drawers, pulls one out and almost spills it as the herbalist, Guru Saj, enters.]
[There was no closing scene, only a preview of the wedding.]
Monica: This would be a beautiful place to get married, yeah, but I wouldnt put the aisle there and I would never have the ceremony there! (Points to both places.) I mean youd have the ceremony under this big beautiful arch. (The arch at the entrance to the room.)
Chandler: Uhh, Joey's grandmother is right there. (Points)
Janine: Is there something wrong?
MONICA: There is no alley behind Macy's.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Chandler and Ross are there. Monica enters]
Rachel: (looking at his butt) There it is. (They hug.)
[Scene, Central Perk: Rachel, Ross and Monica are there]
[Scene: At Chandler and Joey's. Ross and Chandler are there. Ross is watching wrestling.]
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there as Ross enters.]
CHANDLER: OK, well that's the part where I'm a wank. But I was hoping we wouldn't focus on that. [Joey goes to his room and shuts the door] Hey, c'mon man, I said I was sorry like a hundred times, I promise I will never take it off my. . . [notices the bracelet is missing from his wrist] wrist. But if, if you want to stay in there and be mad, you know, you just uh, you stay in there. [he starts searching the room, lifting up the couch cushions]
Rachel: The whole night was horrible, it was pouring down rain, and when I got there, there was no Rachel Green on the list, but there was a Rachel Greep.
Chandler: No, just knowing you're gonna be there is enough.
Chandler: Honey, there are like 20 tickets on the nightstand!
Joey: I dont know, maybe I cant. I mean, maybe theres something wrong with me.
Rachel: Ross said my name up there, I mean, come on, I just cant pretend that didnt happen can I?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are there. Monica is holding the wrapping paper from one of Rachel's gifts.]
Ross: Oh, fire! There, theres a fire! Fire!!
[Scene: The delivery room, Rachel and Frank are there.]
Joey: That's right, he almost could. Which is exactly how I got stuck there.
Phoebe: Not if I get there first.
Rachel: They sent me home from work. They were like, "Start your maternity leave now! Just rest, get ready for the baby." Well yknow what? Screw em! If they dont want me there, Ill just hang out with you guys.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross, Janine and Chandler are there]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Rachel are there as Ross enters.]
Ross: now when they found the remains of the Mesozoic Mastodon they discovered what appeared to be the remains of a Paleozoic Amphibian in its jaws! How did it get there?!
(Theres a knock on the door and a nurse enters carrying Emma.)
Ross: Yeah but uh Okay, okay look you guys know that Rachel and I slept together, but theres something else. (Pause) Rachels pregnant.
Young Ethan: Well, think about it. It's always on the news. 'A man is being held up, at gunpoint.' 'Tourists are being terrorised, at gunpoint.' And I just kept thinking: why does people continue to go there? (He checks his watch.) Oh, ah. I should go.
Dr. Green: This where they put it? What, there no table available in the kitchen! Hello, baby.
[Scene: Chandler's hotel room, he's sitting there with Joey who's talking about his helmet and running his hand through that feathery thing at the top.]
Monica: Well, if you dont have anything to copy, why are you going down there?
Monica: I don't need an actual man, just a couple of his best swimmers. And there, there are places you can go to get that stuff.
Monica: Hey, maybe I'll drive you up there! I'd like to buy some tickets myself!