words in movies
[Scene: Barbados, Monica and Chandler's Room. They both enter from Ross's room. Monica still has her big, frizzy hair.]
(they start to get ready, but then Phoebe enters through the door from Ross's room)
(they all put their ear against the wall to be able to hear what's being said. We move to Ross's room where he and Charlie are kissing.)
(they start to kiss again, and Phoebe turns to Chandler and Monica)
(In the rooms next door, Joey, Rachel, Ross and Charlie stop kissing and try to understand what the yelling was about. After a while they continue kissing. We're back in Chandler and Monica's room. Monica has some of her own hair stuffed in her mouth by Chandler.)
Ross: No, NO! (they're moving to the side of the bed, where they sit down) Look, I need to talk to Joey. I mean, you guys just broke up. Before anything more happens between us, I need to know he's okay with it.
Ross: Alright, I'm gonna go find them... (twitches a bit, looks down) I just need a... need a before I can... you know. (gestures standing up... they sit and wait for a while) Grandma... grandma... grandma... (he tries to concentrate...) Okay, I see you later.
(They are still listening at the wall, when Ross enters their room)
(they rush to the wall to Rachel and Joey's, and we move to that room)
(They leave and Rachel locks the door.)
Rachel: Are they right?
(They want to kiss, but just before their lips touch, Rachel pulls back quickly, gasping)
(They both hug, and Rachel, who was in the back of the plane, sees this and smiles.)
Phoebe: Enchanté (she holds out her hand, and they shake hands)
Rachel: That was one time, Ross, and they were only like 5 milligrams.
Joey: Yeah! Good night! (they give each other a small kiss on the mouth, and stare at each other for a while)
Joey: Good night! (they give each other a kiss again, but this time it lasts longer)
(Now they kiss passionately... and then Ross enters with Emma. They freeze, pull away and look at Ross who looks like he just can't believe what he's seeing. Joey straightens his shirt, and Rachel says I'm so-oo sorry, and presses her breasts together, just like Joey did before.)
Phoebe: Uh-huh! (They hug.) I'm so happy. (She's not happy.)
Phoebe: Right! Never! Never! I swear! (They kiss... The door opens and David comes in again.)
(Suddenly the doors burst open, and ROSS AND RACHEL COME OUT ARM-IN-ARM!!!!! And Rachel's carrying a bouquet!!! THEY GOT MARRIED!!!!)
Joey: I've been trying for two days. When I called the restaurant, they said she was too busy to talk. I can't believe she's blowin' me off.
ROSS: Look at that, they won't even turn their heads.
Rachel: Oh but he did say that they found the grandmother wandering down fifth avenue.
(Cut to Joey's apartment. Joey looks inside the cardboard box that used to be the home of Chick Jr. and Duck Jr., but they have disappeared.)
Gunther: They already do. Thats why they call it the tray spot.
Rachel: No, the other thing. I really think its great they work things out.
(Monica and Paul walk to the door and talk in a low voice so the others can't hear. The others move Monica's table closer to the door so that they can.)
Joey: Do you mind crouching down a little bit, so that I look taller? (Chandler does so) There you go. (And they walk down the red carpet.)
(They hug.)
[they pull out the box of condoms but there's only one left]
Monica: Well, were trying to find someone to perform our wedding and theyre all either boring or annoying or yknow, cant stop staring at the ladies. (Points to her chest.)
Phoebe: No, I know, I know, that this is Franks life, (walks behind them, they turn around in the leather chairs to face her) y'know. Y'know, I dont want to be all judgmental, y'know, but this is sick, its sick and wrong!
(They start playing.)
Phoebe: Excuse me, anniversary. Excuse me, anniversary. (looking at her ticket). Uhm, sir, could you move your nachos... they’re in my seat. It's my anniversary. (to Mike) Here we are! (Mike nods). Can’t believe it's been a whole year!
(They both run to rip the covers off the bed, but are interrupted by Ross.)
(They hug.)
Joey: Look, when everyone eats that...that...Banana-Meat thing, theyre all gonna make fun of her, do you want that?
(They both run and hug theyre respective partners.)
Conan: But audiencesYou have a live studio audience and they must love that. They must love it when they see you guys playing.
Chandler: They thought it was very smart of us to have a child write the recommendation letter.
(They break the embrace.)
(They run to the bed, sit down, and start making out again.)
Phoebe: Okay, thank you, Mr. Heckles. (They move off)
Rachel: Maybe its not as bad as I think. Yknow, maybe they didnt take it the way I meant it.
Ross: What do you mean, theyre not moving in? They-theyre still moving in right?
Phoebe: And this time, theyve ganged up to form one giant, super hat.
(They all laugh.)
Chandler: I'm so sorry, but you should have a sign out there or something. Or at least whisper it to people when they come in the door. "Owen doesn't know he's adopted, and he also thinks that Santa is real."
(They both kiss, and Richard picks her up and goes over to the bed and starts to lie down.)
(They do so and they take off their clothes.)
Rachel: (looking at his butt) There it is. (They hug.)
(They both get up and leave Phoebe alone.)
Phoebe: Okay. (They shake hands and she pulls away suddenly) Oh my God! What did I ever do to you?! (Rubbing her hand.)
(They move into kiss but are interrupted by Joey knocking on the door.)
Chandler: it was like the Algonquin kids table. (They all laugh, but Joey only laughs not to be left out.)
Ross: Uh-huh, that's why they call it Staten Island.
(They start making out again, and it takes Joey trying to enter to stop them.)
(they kiss again)
Joey: I hate this woman!! I hate her! She told everyone in the company about that info-mercial, and now they all keep asking me to open their drinks. Okay, and whenever I cant do it, theyre all like-like laughing at me.
(There's a lot of yelling and screaming coming from the hallway, and they get up to look at what's the noise all about. In the hallway, Monica, Chandler, Joey and Phoebe are having another wind-up animal race, yelling and screaming fanatically.)
Ray: And this is Duncan (points to the cameraman) and Erin, theyre gonna help us out with the audition. So uh, lets get the camera rolling.
Chandler: Why wouldnt they be happy?
Chandler: Theyre in my bag over there. (Points.)
Chandler: Well Monica just told me that they dont.
Rachel: They sent me home from work. They were like, "Start your maternity leave now! Just rest, get ready for the baby." Well yknow what? Screw em! If they dont want me there, Ill just hang out with you guys.
Dr. Green: This where they put it? What, there no table available in the kitchen! Hello, baby.
(They walk into a completely redecorated and repainted room. And of course, the room is immaculate. Only an obsessive-compulsive like Monica could find fault with the room.)
(They turn back around to see the baby Monica's carrying, but then they realise what the surprise is. Ross, Mike, Phoebe and Rachel gasp and stare at Chandler and his baby. Joey hasn't figured it out yet.)
Chandler: Why havent you told them?! Wouldnt they be happy?!
(They walk to the table, but Rachel suddenly gasps. Sitting there is mr Zellner, her boss from her current job at Ralph Lauren.)
Phoebe: Oh. (they start kissing again)
JOEY: [as they're walking out, Dr. Greene questioningly gestures at the Happy Birthday sign over the door] This is clearly in the wrong apartment. [they all walk across the hall]
(They turn back to Rachel and Professor Rathman.)
Rachel: Anyway, they want to take us out Saturday night! What do you say?
Ross: (to Monica and Rachel) Its winter, they are fewer people on the street. (Rachel and Monica smile and nod, knowingly.)
(She opens a door and they both scream at horror at whats inside of it.)
JOEY: My animals. Hey the guy said they suited me, he spoke with an accent, I was all confused. I don't know what I'm gonna do.
Joey: The Estelle Leonard Talent Agency. Wow, an agency left me its card! Maybe they wanna sign me!
(They both look at each other, nod their heads All right and follow their stuff into their new rooms.)
(They turn away.)
(They try to stop him, not sure of what he's planning. He ignores them and goes to talk to Ross.)
Chandler: Did they teach you that in your anger management class?
[Scene: The hallway between the apartments, they are taking Phoebe to the hospital but Chandler and Monica hold back.]
Rachel: I know, it's huge, and it's scary, and it's... really far, far away from you guys, but this is such an incredible opportunity for me. And I've already talked to them about our situation with Emma, and they said they'll do whatever we need to make us feel comfortable.
Monica: Yes! (They run over to a platform)
(They dance over to him.)
Monica: Ross theyre really, really, really white.
Joey: Okay. (They kiss.)
Joey: Okay. (They kiss.)
Monica: Aw, it's soo unfair. (they both start digging into the 'good' ice cream)
Janine: Thank you. (They kiss.)
Chandler: I dont know, but dont worry, dont worry, because I know how to take a picture now. (They get ready) Okay, see? Look down (Looks down), look down, look down (He falls asleep.)
Monica: Im gonna miss you! (They hug.)
(Chandler enters, and Joey is standing near the chair, they have a show down to see who gets the chair and Joey wins)
Rachel: And I also wanted you guys to know that I am telling the father today. (They all look at her expectantly) What? What? What?
(They start to go inside.)
Monica: No, they gave us glasses with lipstick on them! I mean, if they didn't change the glasses, who knows what else they didn't change. (He glares at her.) Come on sweetie, I just want this weekend to be perfect, I mean we can change rooms, can't we?
All: Aww! (They all laugh.)
Monica: No, no its going to be great. Really! Mom, Dad, when I got married, one of the things that made me sure I could do it was the amazing example the two of you set for me. For that and so many other things I want to say thank you. I know I probably dont say it enough, but I love you. (Pretends to cry hoping her parents will join her.) When I look around this room, Im-Im saddened by the thought of those who could not be here with us. Nana, my beloved grandmother who would so want to be here, but she cant because shes dead. As is our dog Chi-Chi. I mean look how cute she is. (Holds up the picture and pretends to cry again). Was. (To an old man by the stage.) Do me a favor and pass this to my parents. Remember shes dead. Okay, her and Nana, gone. Wow! Hey does anybody remember when Debra Winger had to say goodbye to her children in Terms of Endearment? (Chandler covers his ears) Didnt see that? No movie fans?! You want to hear something sad? The other day I was watching 60 Minutes these orphans in Romania, who have been so neglected, they were incapable of love. (Waits for people to cry, but doesnt get any tears.) You people are made of stone! Heres to mom and dad! Whatever!
Rachel: Okay, well then how about puberty! Come on, thats always a painful time! Yknow your friends invite you to a slumber party and then they stick your hand in warm water while youre sleeping so that you pee in your sleeping bag.
(They go to the food table.)
Ross: They put that in.
Monica: C'mon Chandler, I think we have been given an opportunity. I mean, the mistake has already been made. They are writing up the paper right now.
Phoebe: (To Joey) You ate meat! (Joey is shocked) (To Chandler and Monica) You had sex! (Theyre shocked.)
Rachel: Ah! You know what honey guys are just different, they like things that we can't understand, you know I once dated this guy who wanted to pretend he was an archeologist and I was a naughty cave woman that he unfroze from a block of ice.
(They run and hug each other.)
(They both look at her.)
Phoebe: What else do they add smell too?
Monica: Well, its a set and they should probably stay together.
Chandler: Oh they didnt want to come!
Chandler: Theyre terrific, and they live right here in the city.
Monica: Oh man, they think they are so slick messing with us! But see they don't know that we know that they know! So
[The hallway. Rachel and Ross go out and they just stand there for a few seconds.]
Joey: Oh well, the powerball lottery is upto 300 million and they don't sell tickets here in New York, so...
Joey: (smiling) I don't know. This little, old lady lives for my career. When they dumped me off of Days of Our Lives she almost died.
(They kiss.)
Chandler: All right everybody! Just be quiet! Be quiet! Be quiet!! Pipe-pipe-pipe down! (They settle down) What is the matter with you people?! This woman was trying to do a nice thing for you. She was making candy so she could try to get to know all of you, and Ill bet that not one of you can tell me her name! Am I right?