words in movies
Ross: Well remember that paper I had published last year on sediment flow rate, huh? They loved it.
Ross: I know! Anyway, they asked me to be a guest lecturer! I mean its temporary, but uh, if they like me it could lead to a full time job. How great would that look great on a mailbox, huh? "Professor Geller."
(They pause to think about it.)
Chandler: Okay, its not a check. Theyre saying your health insurance expired because, you didnt work enough last year.
Rachel: Oh yeah, theyre really great! Arent they?
Estelle: Well! Well! Well! Joey Tribbiani! So you came back huh? They think they can do better but they all come crawling back to Estelle!
Rachel: Yeah, we could. Oh hey look! Theres some Kappa Kappa Deltas! I was a Kappa. (to them) Hey sisters! (They ignore her.) (To Monica) Wow, we really are bitches.
(They enter the lecture hall to find Ross speaking in an English accent for some unknown reason.)
Ross: Look, I was nervous! You guys had me all worried I was going to be boring! I got up there and they were all like staring at me. I opened my mouth and this British accent just came out.
(They turn back to Rachel and Professor Rathman.)
Rachel: No! They are mine!
Rachel: Yeah, I mean, come on Ross, no one will even notice. I mean theyre probably not even listening!
Ross: Theyre not listening too me?
Rachel: Of course theyre listening to you! Everybody listens to you.
Ross: (British) Come again? Whats-whats this nonsense? (Giggles.) (American.) All right, Im-Im not English. Im from Long Island. I was really nervous and the accent just uh, just came out. Im sorry. So, if we could just get back to the lecture. Umm, were there any questions? (Everyone raises their hands) About paleontology. (They all put their hands down.) All right, look I was just trying to make a good first impression. Obviously, I screwed up. But what you guys think of me is really important because Im-Im hoping to get a permanent job here. So if you just give me another chance to make a good impression
(Decided that they are less than human as well, Chandler picks up a golf club and Monica a frying pan, to join in on the fun of beating their good friend to within an inch of his life!)
Chandler: Theyre terrific, and they live right here in the city.
Monica: Oh man, they think they are so slick messing with us! But see they don't know that we know that they know! So
[The hallway. Rachel and Ross go out and they just stand there for a few seconds.]
Monica: Well, its a set and they should probably stay together.
Joey: Oh well, the powerball lottery is upto 300 million and they don't sell tickets here in New York, so...
Chandler: Oh they didnt want to come!
Joey: (smiling) I don't know. This little, old lady lives for my career. When they dumped me off of Days of Our Lives she almost died.
Phoebe: What else do they add smell too?
(They kiss.)
Chandler: All right everybody! Just be quiet! Be quiet! Be quiet!! Pipe-pipe-pipe down! (They settle down) What is the matter with you people?! This woman was trying to do a nice thing for you. She was making candy so she could try to get to know all of you, and Ill bet that not one of you can tell me her name! Am I right?
Chandler: (entering) Check it out! Check it out! When the babies wake up, they can meet Krog! (He holds up this Xena-like warrior action figure.)
(They exit and close the door.)
Rachel: Hey. (they all walk away from Chandler)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, they are all there eating breakfast.]
Monica: Okay, I think thats it. The seating chart is done. This is our wedding. They all look like theyre having fun dont they?
Ross: Come on! (They start to leave.)
(There's a pause as they figure out what to say.)
Monica: Well, I mean what about friends of your grandmothers? Wouldnt they have the recipe?
Janine: They said stuff to me too, yknow!
Joey: I hate Pottery Barn too. They kicked me out of there just because I sat on a bed!
Joey: I guess they weren't as good friends as we are.
RACHEL: They had to reduce it because of, of my deviated septum.
Joey: Hey! (They hug.)
(They both enter the apartment again, where Amanda is "dancing" for Chandler, but she's really terrible at it)
RACHEL: Well, maybe they can find a way to bring you back.
Joey: Oh Monica, listen, I ah, I saw down at the hardware store, they got those designer tiles on sale. If you ever want to redo the bathroom floor.
(They both sit down.)
Susan: Hey! (They hug.)
Rachel: Hey, now wait a minute! I get when you told people at first that you wanted to be an actor they laughed at you! Now come on Bobby, why dont you tell us a little bit about your band?
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
(She leaves the apartment and they all stare at Ross)
Chandler: Okay! (They both get up.)
(They both laugh.)
Monica: Yeah, well, Im using noise. Okay. All right! So, is everybody ready? Here we go. (She flips on the switch and a hum starts.) I hear something! I hear something! Where is it? (They all start looking until Rachel realises its Joey.)
Ross: Yeah? Hop on. (They start dancing and Mona sits down.) Is the pretty lady looking?
(They both scream and jump away.)
(they go into Monica and Rachels, and see Phoebe hopping around.)
Phoebe: I know, theyre gonna be so happy together.
Monica: You are just the sweetest. (They kiss.)
Chandler: Okay. (They hug.)
Joey: Yeah! (They head downstairs.)
[Cut to Earls office, who is played by Jason Alexander, George from Seinfeld. They cut back and forth between Phoebes and Earls offices with each of their lines.]
Rachel: I tried! They won't take her back.
Rachel: My God! (They both run into the bedrooms.)
(As they start back down the couch drops a little bit and gets jammed. They try to free it to no avail.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica answers the door and lets her parents in. They are carrying boxes.]
Rachel: Oh thanks, but listen, I was just at Monicas and she and Chandler had a big fight and theyre not moving in.
Mr. and Mrs. Geller: Yes. (They look at Chandler angrily.)
Ross: What? No! Of course, of course I do! Are-are they gone?
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's hotel room, Rachel is still trying to get the ink off and Ross is on the phone to the company. Wait a minute, why exactly are they sharing a hotel room? Didn't they like break-up or something? Did I miss a memo? Or maybe, it's just foreshadowing things to come. Who knows? Maybe the answer's at the bottom of the page. Then again, maybe it isn't and it's just one of those things TV writers just don't explain. Anyhoo ]
(They start making out again.)
(They leave on the tour and Rachel goes to follow them but Phoebe stops her and drags her into the kitchen.)
(They kiss.)
Ross: Come on. (She gets on the bike.) All right, here we go. All right? (They start.)
(She opens the door and they kiss.)
Rachel: Well that sounds fun too. (They hug.)
[Scene: The Emergency Room. The officious admissions nurse is again on duty. Rachel and Monica enter, looking worried. As they approach the desk, Rachel adopts a winning smile, while Monica struggles to smile at all.]
Phoebe: Oh, thank you so much! (They hug.) Okay.
Phoebe: Look Eric, turn around. (He does so.) Look, I like you, but it shouldnt be this hard. Yknow? This is our first date yknow? First dates are supposed to be about excitement and electricity and Ooh, he just touched my hand, did he mean to touch my hand? and yknow first kisses and (He kisses her) second kisses. (Motions for him to kiss her again which he does and they start to make out.)
Monica: Oh no! My parents have never seen me drunk! (Pause) That they know of.
Guys: Hockey! (They go to leave but are blocked by three of Rachel's friends, Leslie, Kiki, and Joanne. The guys pause to stare at them.) Hockey! Hockey. (The guys.)
(They start trying to trade babies while holding one each. They have no idea how to do it, so they just shift the babies around in their arms. They give up pretty quickly.)
Ross: Come on! (They go to the jetway, Ross hands the tickets to the gate agent.) Here.
(They both get up and Monica expects Joey to take the lead, but he doesnt, and they fumble around for a little bit.)
Interviewer: You sure they haven't gone bad? You're sure they're not very, very bad?
Chandler: Y'know what else I can't believe? I had to kiss Phoebe and Rachel every time I left a room, I mean it's too bad they didn't see us having sex.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers bedroom, they are both getting undressed.]
Pete: Oh, believe me, I dont want to get hurt either. Im being smart about this. See these guys? Theyre the best trainers in the world, and Hoshi here used to be a paid assassin. (Hoshi yells at him in Chinese) A house painter! He used to be a house painter.
Leslie: Yeah, but, I dont do that anymore. I got kinda sick of it, and then I couldnt come up with anything good, so they fired me.
All: (they all recoil from the smell emanating from him) Oh! God! Wow!
Ross: No! I made it seem like I was just calling to chat. Pretty sure, they both think Im interested in them.
(Joey turns off the lights, and they all leave as Rachel starts to clean up. Ross enters from the bathroom.)
(They start to walk into the living room and notice someones head sticking up from behind a chair. The camera cuts to the other side and we see its Ross.)
Susan: I thought they could...I'll try to get back as soon as I can. I'm sorry. (Ross realizes Kristin was expecting him to laugh, so he starts to laugh hysterically.)
(When they finish, they walk over to the director)
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers bedroom, they are in bed together.]
Chandler: Yeah, but its not who I am. Everything they said was exaclty why I was worried about having a kid. And its true. And look everybody knows it.
(They shake hands and their lines overlap.)
Kathy: Oh. Well uh, (to Chandler) you not being able to talk may make this easier. Listen umm (She looks at the gang who are watching, they take the hint and leave them alone.) Listen I dont wanna be someone who comes between two best friends. I just, I cant stand seeing what this is doing to you guys, and I dont wanna be the cause of that. So, I dont think we can see each other anymore. Im gonna go to my moms in Chicago, Im gonna stay there for awhile. I think this couldve be something really amazing, but yknow this is probably for the best. Yknow? Im gonna miss you. Good-bye, Chandler.
Monica: Hi honey. We just got a wedding gift from Bob and Faye Bing; they dont like us do they? (They gave them a pok-a-dotted punch bowl.)
Chandler: This is okay. Were all adults here; theres nothing to be ashamed of. Now, lets put our underwear in our pockets and walk out the door. (They do so and find Mr. Geller leaning against a wall stunned.)
All: Oh! Oh! (they all recoil in horror)
RACHEL: Come on, they were not that huge.
Monica and Chandler: Three! (They lift up the covers and check each other out, then come back up with silly grins on their faces.)
Ross: Aw, we-we are so (Motions that theyre connected.) So umm, well I-I-I like you and I-I love umm, yknow hanging out with you. And I mean-Im having a lot of fun. (He pauses and thinks there might be more, but decides there isnt.)
(They start making out again.)
Rachel: Honey, come on, I have to be at work in like ten minutes (Ross starts kissing her neck) Oh, all right, well it's not like I'm employee of the year or anything. (they fall onto the couch)
Rachel: Noooooo!! (Phoebe lifts up the sheet to discover the exact same apothecary table they have.)
(they all look confused and sorry for her)
Mrs. Green: and all those dinosaur nick-knacks you have Ross, I thought they might be more at home in the garage.
MONICA: They want me to do it, which is really cool, seeing as I've never catered before, and I really need the money, and this isn't a problem for you, is it?
Monica: No! (They both laugh.) Oyster?
Monica: Okay. Lets hurryOh wait! Do we have a condom? (He looks at her.) Oh right! (Laughs and they resume making out when a nurse catches them in the act.)
Paul: It was horrible. They called me chicken boy.
(They hug.)
Chandler: Okay. (They hug.)
Phoebe: And yknow, even if they break up again, youd better not let him in your sad mens club!
Mr. Geller: I love you sweetheart. (He kisses her and they sit down.)
RACHEL: OK. [they go to kiss but everyone's watching so Ross just kisses her on the top of her head and leaves]
Joey: Yeah! Ask them if they brought their friends any souvenirs!