words in movies
[Scene: Rosss Wedding, continued from last season, the Minister is about to marry Ross and Emily.]
Minister: Friends. Family. We are gathered to celebrate here today the joyous union of Ross and Emily. (Time lapse) Now Ross, repeat after me. I Ross...
Rachel: (To the woman sitting in front of her) He-he said Rachel, right? Do you think I should go up there?
Minister: Ross and Emily have made their declarations and it gives me great pleasure to declare them husband and wife.
(He goes to kiss her, but she isnt very receptive of the kiss. She keeps avoiding him, until Ross finally gets to kiss her on her cheek.)
Mrs. Geller: (To Mr. Geller) This is worse than when he married the lesbian.
(The band starts to play, and the recessional starts. Ross tries to take Emilys hand, but she snatches it away from him.)
(Ross and Emily make it to the lobby.)
Emily: (Yelling from inside the bathroom) Youve spoiled everything! Its like a nightmare! My friends and family are out there! How can I face them?! How can you do this to me?!
Joey: (To the gang) Hey, no matter what happens with Ross and Emily, we still get cake right?
Ross: (exiting the bathroom) That-that-thats all right, no honey, you take your time sweetie. Ill be right out here. (She slams the door in his face, to the gang) Shes just fixing her makeup.
Mr. Geller: Boy, bad time to say the wrong name, huh Ross?
Ross: Thats true, thanks dad. (To All) People should be dancing! Huh? Hey, this is a party! Come on! Joey, dance!! (He starts to dance but stops when no one else joins him.)
Phoebe: Yeah, Ive discovered that Ross forgot to take his brain medicine, uh, now without it, uh, in the brain of Ross, uh womens names are interchangeable, through-through no fault of his own.
(Cut to Chandler and Monica at the buffet table.)
Chandler: Oh wow, I hope you dont take this the wrong way but, I know we had plans to meet up tonight and, ugh, Im just kinda worried about what it might do to our friendship.
(He throws down his plate and runs to the wine cellar, Monica is about to follow him but is intercepted by Rachel.)
Monica: Toe the line. Thread the needle. Think outside the box! (Tries to leave, but is stopped by Rachel.)
Rachel: Whoa, wait, listen, I think Im just gonna talk to Ross about what he think it meant.
(Cut to Mr. and Mrs. Geller.)
Mr. Geller: Oh yeah, well who serves steak when theres no place to sit, I mean how are you supposed to eat this?
(Cut to Monica and Chandler, Monica is running up to him.)
Monica: Where were you? We were supposed to meet in the wine cellar?
(Joey walks up to them.)
(Cut to Rachel and Ross.)
Rachel: (laughs) Yknow when I locked myself in the bathroom at my wedding, it was because I was trying to pop the window out of the frame.
(They all start laughing, and quickly stop when they realize what she just said and run over to the bathroom.)
Ross: (Bangs on the bathroom door) Emily? Emily? Im coming in. (He opens the door to reveal that the window is gone, along with Emily.)
[Scene: London Marriott, Monica and Chandler are walking to her room.]
(She laughs and opens the door to reveal Rachel sitting on the bed.)
Rachel: Ross said my name. Okay? My name. Ross said my name up there that obviously means that he still loves me! (They both just stare at her.) Okay, dont believe me, I know Im rightdo you guys want to go downstairs and get a drink?
Chandler: Yes, we do. But, we have to change first.
Monica: Yes, I want to change. And why-why dont you go down and get us a table?
Rachel: Hello? Oh, Pheebs! (To them) Its Phoebe!
Rachel: Okay, Pheebs, yknow what, lets look at this objectively all right? Ninth grade, right? The obsession starts. All right? The summer after ninth grade he sees me in a two-piece for the first time, his obsession begins to grow. So then
Chandler: (To Monica) Hey, listen, why dont we go change in my room?
(Cut to Chandlers room, he opens the door slowly to see if Joey is there and after seeing that he isnt, ushers Monica into the room, closes the door, and the security bar.)
(They both start to frantically rip each others clothes off, but are interrupted when Joey tries to open the door.)
Chandler: Well, I suppose Id have to say you!! But, what if were watching a movie in here?
[Scene: Ross and Emilys room, Chandler and Monica are still looking for a place to do the deed.]
(They both run to rip the covers off the bed, but are interrupted by Ross.)
Ross: No! For all I know, shes trying to find me but couldnt because I kept moving around. No, from now on, Im staying in one place. (He sits down on the bed.) Right here.
Ross: Thanks guys! (They both sit down on either side of him.) I really appreciate this, yknow, but you dont have to rub my butt.
Chandler: We have to leave for New York in an hour.
(They both try to slowly extricate themselves from Ross, but theres a knock on the door that awakens him.)
Ross: Em-Emily? (Looking around for her.) Em-Emily? (He runs to the door.) Emily! (He opens the door to reveal the Walthams standing outside.)
Mr. Waltham: Shes in hiding. Shes utterly humiliated. She doesnt want to see you ever again.
Ross: Now, hold on! Hold on! (Stops him) Look, look, your daughter and I are supposed to leave tonight for our honeymoon, now-now you-you tell her that Im gonna be at that airport and I hope that shell be there too! Oh yeah, I said Rachels name, but it didnt mean anything, Okay? Shes-shes just a friend and thats all! (Rachel sits down, depressed.) Thats all! Now just tell Emily that I love her and that I cant imagine spending my life with anyone else. Please, promise me that youll tell her that.
Mr. Waltham: All right, Ill tell her. (To his wife) Come on bugger face!
Monica: Yknow, maybe its best that we never got to do it again.
Monica: Im gonna go to the bathroom, maybe Ill see you there in a bit?
(Monica gets up and heads for the bathroom, Chandler turns to watch her go and is startled to see Joey sitting in Monicas seat.)
Chandler: Okay man. (Chandler starts to get up.)
Phoebe: (To Joey) You ate meat! (Joey is shocked) (To Chandler and Monica) You had sex! (Theyre shocked.)
Joey: Why would you need to say hi to them, youve been feeding them for four days?
(She grabs her bag and leaves, Joey moves a little quicker to his apartment, leaving Monica and Chandler alone.)
Monica: Right. Umm, listen since were-we-re on that subject, umm, I just wanted to tell you that uh, well, I-I was going through a really hard time in London, what with my brother getting married and that guy thinking I was Rosss mother
Monica: Well, an-anyway, I justthat night meant a lot to me, I guess Im just trying to say thanks.
Chandler: Oh. Yknow, that night meant a lot to me too, and it wasnt because I was in a bad place or anything, it just meant a lot to me cause, youre really hot! Is that okay?
(After he closes the door, Monica starts to follow him, but thinks better of it and stops.)
[Scene: An airport in London, Ross is waiting for Emily to show up to go on their honeymoon and sees Rachel walking past.]
Rachel: So umm, what time are you supposed to leave?
Gate Agent: (On the P.A.) This is the last call for Flight 1066 to Athens. The last call.
Gate Agent: (On the P.A.) All ticketed passengers for Flight 1066 to Athens should now be on board.
Ross: Come on! (They go to the jetway, Ross hands the tickets to the gate agent.) Here.
Ross: You tell them to wait!
Ross: Oh no-no-no! Oh-no! (Emily starts to run out and Ross chases her.) No! No! Emily!
[Scene: Flight 1066 to Athens, Rachel is ordering a drink for Ross and herself.]
Rachel: Ahh, yes, I will have a glass of the Merlot and uh, (points to Rosss seat.) he will have a white wine spritzer. Woo! (Looks out the window.) Hey, look at that, the airports moving. (Realizes that thats not how it works.) Hey, are we moving?! Are we moving? Why are we moving? Hey, time-out, umm, yeah, does the captain know that were moving? (Sits back in defeat.) Oh my God. Oh, my gosh.
Rachel: What about all the women you want to bring home?
Sarah: (approaching with two filled balloons in her hands) Nobody! We put them in here! (Indicates the aforementioned balloons causing both of them to scream in delight and start drinking from the balloons.)
[cut to later]
Joey: Yeah, what were you trying to get her to do?!
[cut to later]
Joey: (dejected) Yeah okay. (To Chandler) Even though my tax dollars paid for this car.
[cut to later]
JOEY: How can they do this to me?
Joey: No! No, I-I just wanna thank you guys for what you did for my parents, that was really sweet. Theyre so happy they get to be a part of your special day.
Joey: Im just so nervous! Yknow? The callback isnt until tomorrow at five. I feel like my head is going to explode!
Phoebe: Joey, you can't make someone do something they don't want to do. Believe me, there's something I've been trying to get Mike to do in bed and there's... he's just...
Joey: Friends, family, dog... Thank you all for being here to witness this blessed event. The cold has now spread to my special place... so I'm gonna do the short version of this. Phoebe and Mike are perfect for each other. And I know I speak for every one here... when I wish them a lifetime of happiness. Who has the rings?
Rachel: (to Ross) Yes! Did you see that?
Monica: Yknow, I really have to tell Rachel, but I We just have to get it over with! Yknow, the next time we see them were just gonna tell them. Okay? Thats it.
[cut to later]
Phoebe: Come on! Let us be guys! Maybe we want to be guys!
[cut to later]
Dr. Green: What, the heart attack or sitting here talking to you?
Rachel: Okay, well you are just gonna have too, okay. Because I already got a Mother and a Father who cannot stay in the same room together, okay, I dont wanna have to have a separate room for you too!! (starts to cry)
[cut to later]
[cut to later]
Paul: Well yeah, it usually, it takes two people to (He taps his index fingers together.)
Monica: Phoebe, do you want to go see a movie after dinner tonight?
(Chandler waits until Jill is looking, then starts to blow a bubble. But instead of blow one, he accidentally spits the gum out of his mouth and hits the wall.)
[cut to later]
Ross: Oh well yeah, actually I was going to talk to her when you guys all came in the room.
[Cut to Living Room]
[Cut to Monica's bedroom]
[cut to later]
Ross: (looks angrily at Joey and points at him) I swear to God...! (Joey is in shock)
[Cut to Living Room]
[Cut to Living Room]
[Cut to Monica's bedroom]
[Cut to Monica's bedroom]
[Cut to Living Room]
Joey: What-what are you guys doing here? I thought I told you not to come.
Rachel: I mean I think Id say no to anybody right now. (Hearing this Gunther swoops back to cleaning tables.) Oh, but it was so strange. I mean Im standing there with this charming, cute guy, whos asking me to go out with him, which Im allowed to do, and I felt guilty. Y'know, like Id be cheating on Ross or something.
Chandler: Y'know what else I can't believe? I had to kiss Phoebe and Rachel every time I left a room, I mean it's too bad they didn't see us having sex.
Joey: Its no big deal, okay? Phoebe and I talked about it. Its just a crush! Its going to go away! (Looks down) Dude, you gotta rearrange your bubbles! Oh!
RACHEL: [sings] And you're no friend to those with noses.
[cut to later]
[cut to later]
Cheryl: Um, would you like to come in?
Monica: Oh. (to Phoebe) Can I have a tissue?
Phoebe: (on the other side of the line, still pretending to be Estelle) Joey, it's Estelle. (Joey's eyes bulge up, he looks afraid)
[cut to later]
Emily: My uncle dragged us there. But, it actually it turned out to be really interesting.
Monica: And thats why, Im not inviting you in for a drink. (starts to leave) Bye.
Amy: H-Hi!!(to Ross) And you are...?
Jill: (entering) I dont want to talk about it.
PHOE: Oh, well, we have to celebrate. You know what we should do? We should do, like, a soap opera theme.
RACHEL: I just can't believe this is happening. I mean, when I was little, everybody's parents were getting divorced. I just figured as a grownup I wouldn't have to worry about this.
Mr. Geller: Now I'm depressed! ...(To everyone) Even more than I was.
[cut to later]
Rachel: Yeah but, you dont, you dont, you dont want to try to much too fast. Yknow? I mean, you do remember what happened to the little girl that tried to much too fast dont you?
(Rachel and Elizabeth go upstairs. Paul starts for the car, but notices his luggage is still out and decides to take in into the bedroom.)
[cut to later]
(The sitcom begins with its familiar refrain, yet with a Latin lilt. Rachel and Monica do a little dance with their chopsticks, and Phoebe has to grin as Ross joins in the rhythm.)
[cut to later]
[cut to later]
Ross: Oh, thanks, thanks. So Monica tells me that uh, you dont want to play anymore because me and y'know my talent. Is that true?
[cut to later]
Monica: (to Ross) I can't believe you did that.
[Scene: Chandlers bedroom, hes listening to the hypnosis tape again.]
Joey: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) What are you talking about? The auditions not til 5:00! (Chandler suddenly remembers and looks at the unfinished message then tries to sneak over and finish it as Joey listens.) Well, nobody told me! (Listens) Whod you talk to? (Listens and turns around to see Chandler trying to finish the message.) Nevermind! (Hangs up.)
Phoebe: Yeah, I wanted to call and tell you that there's no hard feelings for firing me.
Ross: Okay. (Sits down next to Phoebe.) You uh, you wanna hear something weird?
Ross: Thank you, thanks. (Sits down next to the girls) Yeah, I lost it. Yknow, Im not gonna play anymore, (to Phoebe) would you, can you finish my set?
MONICA: No. Um, I know you like this, and I want you to have it. I think it'll look good in our apartment.
Joey: Yes, but in Drake Remorays body. (Ross laughs unbelievably.) Why is this so hard for you to get? I thought you were a scientist!
Dr. Green: I have no idea, I went to the bathroom. So sweetie, you were starting to tell me what is uh, what is new with you.
Monica: I'm sorry, Joey. I'm gonna go to bed, guys.
(cut to later in the day)
Rachel: Chandler, Im not gonna lie to ya, but I am gonna run away from you. (Gets up and hurries out.)
Monica: I'm making cookies for Erica. And oh, by the way, we have to leave for the airport soon, her plane comes in about an hour.
PHOEBE: Ok, I didn't see it, because I was putting on my jacket, but I uh want to believe you.
Chandler: (to the ticket agent) American Express?
[Cut to Chandler, Joey, and Ross's apartment, Rachel enters and sneaks up to Chandler's bedroom where she overhears Chandler and Monica talking.]
(Camera pans to Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe in the kitchen)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is trying to move off of the couch as Rachel enters.]
Ross: (gasps) Hi... There she is. Hi Emma. Oh my God, I missed you. (kisses her) Oh Emma, I missed you so much. Hey... Did you have a good time with grandma Green? Huh? Did she give you a bottle of anti-depressants again to use as a rattle? (to Rachel)
Chandler: We really need to take those tests?
(They come to a door and silently agree to try it. A very sweaty woman emerges)
Ross: You know what, you can go, I just have to fill out some forms. (Tries to hold the pen but cant)
Phoebe: Well, youre just gonna have to try.
Rachel: Oh, come on! He's glad that I came, he doesn't want me to go anywhere, balls flying all over the place!
[cut back to the present.]
Mike: Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! Is this, hot Rachel, that you took to the Christmas party, Rachel?
Rachel: Oh Phoebe, we forgot that party we have to go to.
LITTLE BULLY: Well then here's the deal, you won't have to so long as never ever show your faces in this coffee house ever again.
Ross: So do we!! So do we!! (Ross notices a couple has been staring at them.) Im sorry you had to see that.
Ross: (opening the door to see Mona standing there) Mona? What arehi! What are you doing here? Im, um, supposed to pick you up!
Joey and Chandler: (start to sing) Hey! Happy birthday ...
Joey: Yeah! Okay! (He notices a beautiful woman sitting behind the couch and goes to talk to her.) Hey! Hi!
[Cut to Joey's room, who's going throw his own contractions. Plus, he has Ross in a headlock.]
Joey: Great! All right. Ill see you later. (He starts to leave.)
Joey: Thats right I stepped up! Shes my friend and she needed help! And if I had too, Id pee on anyone of you! Only, uhh, I couldnt. I got the stage fright. I wanted to help, but there was too much pressure. So-so I uh, I turned to Chandler.
Joey: You guys got anything to eat? I just went down to Johnos for some chicken and it was closed!
Joey: No! No! No! No, Im not going to punch Chandler.
Phoebe: (to Leslie) Oh, I thought you werent coming. What? Where were you?