words in movies
JOEY: Alright open your eyes. [opens his eyes to see two black leather recliners and a big screen TV]
chandler: Now we can finally watch Green Acres the way it was meant to be seen.
JOEY: Whichever one you want, man. Whichever one you want. [Chandler starts to sit in one of the chairs] Not that one.
ROSS: [beeper goes off] Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got to get to the museum. So um, I'll see you tonight.
RACHEL: OK. [they go to kiss but everyone's watching so Ross just kisses her on the top of her head and leaves]
MONICA: [walks up to Rachel in front of the TV] Tonight?
MONICA: Tonight you're supposed to waitress for me, my catering thing, any of those words trigger anything for you?
MONICA: Really Phoebs? Because, you know, you'd have to be an actual waitress. This can't be like your 'I can be a bear cub' thing.
DR. BURKE: Monica? My God you used to be so. . . I mean you, you, you, you must have lost like. . . You look great.
DR. BURKE: Hi Phoebe, nice to meet you. [Phoebe just giggles when they shake] So, how ya been?
DR. BURKE: No no, it, it's fine, believe me. I do it too. I always answer with the 'I'm OK' head bob. [demonstrates] 'I'm OK.' [tilts head] 'You sure?' [bobs head] 'Yeah, I'm fine.' Hey listen, I've got to set up the music. I got a new CD changer, of course the divorce only left me with 4 CD's to change.
CHANDLER: Uh, two larges, extra cheese on both. But listen, don't ring the buzzer for 19, ring 20, Geller-Green, they'll let you in, OK. If you buzz our door, there's no tip for you. OK, thanks. Pizza's on the way. I told you we wouldn't have to get up.
JOEY: What if we have to pee?
MONICA: You've got to get back out there, it's your party.
DR. BURKE: Only because my parents wanted me to be, I wanted to be a sherrif.
DR. BURKE: OK. You better. Oh God, here we go. Hey wanna see 'em go nuts? Watch this. [grabbing some wine glasses and opening the door to the party] Who needs glasses? [everyone laughs]
RACHEL: C'mon, I'm not saying it was a bad movie, I'm just saying, you know, it was a little. . . hard to follow.
ROSS: I told you there was going to be sub-titles.
RACHEL: I know, I just didn't want to wear my glasses on my first date.
RACHEL: I'm sorry. Oh God, I'm sorry, it's just that when you moved your hands down to my butt, it was like woah, Ross's hands are on my butt. Sorry.
JOEY: What're you doin' here? Aren't you supposed to be out with Rachel?
ROSS: Yeah. I don't know, I've been wanting this since like ninth grade typing, ya know. And I just want it to be perfect and right and. . . why isn't that laser beam cutting through the paint?
CHANDLER: Listen can you guys uh, speak up, it's harder for us to hear you when you lower your voice.
RACHEL: OK, listen, I'm sorry about last night and I really want to make it up to you.
ROSS: No, you, ya know there's no need to make it u. . . how?
RACHEL: Well, I was thinking maybe a um, a romantic dinner with um, candles and wine and then uh, maybe going back to my place for um, dessert.
[there's a loud bang at the door so Ross opens it back up to find a shoe has been thrown at it]
DR. BURKE: I'm going to look into your eyes now.
DR. BURKE: So, it's great to see ya.
PHOEBE: We have got to get you lazy boys out of these chairs.
ROSS: Well we just wanted to stop by and uh, say goodnight.
JOEY: [uses a dentist mirror to see] Naa, she's lyin'.
MONICA: Stop sending food to our apartment.
ROSS: Who's Richard Burke? Doc, Doctor Burke? You have a date with Doctor Burke? Why, why, why should that bother me? I, I love that man, he's like a uh, brother to dad.
MONICA: Well for your information he happens to be one of the brightest, most sophisticated, sexiest men I've ever been with.
RACHEL: When I was um, 7, I crashed my bike right out in front of his house and to stop me from crying he kissed me right here. [points to the tip of her nose]
ROSS: [on the phone] Woah, woah, woah australopithicus isn't supposed to be in that display. No. No. No, n, homo-habilus was erect, australopithicus was never fully erect.
ROSS: Oh look, I can't believe this. Look, homo-habilus hasn't even learned how to use tools yet and they've got him here wi, with clay pots. Why don't, why don't they just give him a microwave? I'm sorry, I'm sorry this is taking so long, ya know, I, I, it's just it's longer than I expected, we will have dinner.
[Ross leaves to find Karl. Rachel takes a peek under the loincloth of one of the display models.]
DR. BURKE: I didn't need to know that. I guess 21 years is a lot. I mean, hell, I'm a whole person who can drink older than you.
MONICA: Well, we don't really have to decide anything right now, do we?
[The stereo system booms out 'Billions of years ago. . .'. Ross gets up and changes it to music.]
ROSS: Well uh, you see that, that little cluster of stars next to the big one? That is Ursa Major.
ROSS: I've no idea, could be. Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight. RACHEL: Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight. [they kiss] ROSS: You're not laughing. RACHEL: This time it's not so funny. [They kiss and start undressing. As Rachel tries to pull off Ross's tie she catches it in his mouth. Then they roll across the fur rug.] RACHEL: Ah, oh God. Oh, honey, oh that's OK. ROSS: What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box. RACHEL: Oh, thank God. [Scene: Museum of Natural History. The next morning Rachel and Ross are sleeping in the display under a fur.] ROSS: Hi. RACHEL: Hi you. I can't believe I'm waking up next to you. ROSS: I know it is pretty unbelievaaaaah. RACHEL: What? ROSS: We're not alone. [A church youth group is outside the display watching them] CLOSING CREDITS [Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They are still in their chairs, watching Beavis and Butthead.] [they're laughing along with the show when an alarm goes off] JOEY: Is that the fire alarm? CHANDLER: Yeah. [feels the floor] Oh it's not warm yet, we still have time. JOEY: Cool.
Joey: Hey! (To Chandler) Dude, some guy just called for you.
Chandler: I'm so sorry, but you should have a sign out there or something. Or at least whisper it to people when they come in the door. "Owen doesn't know he's adopted, and he also thinks that Santa is real."
RACHEL: (as herself) "Well, but I'm not sure I really want to do anything about it."
Chandler: Do you want me to be afraid of you?
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is trying to tell Rachel about Emily's ultimatum again.]
[cut back to Ross who finally finishes his so-called song with the same crash from before. He gets some applause, mainly cause hes done.]
RACHEL: So. I mean, who here does not have the time to get to know Julie?
Joey: Half hour. (Rachel turns to look at him and he nods yes.)
Joey: So when do we get to meet the guy?
Steve: I came to talk to you about Howard.
Woman No. 2: Okay, yeah, I just wanted a cat. (Starts to leave.)
(He starts to put his pants on, but Rachel manages to drag him to the chair. When they get to the chair, Chandler drops his pants and knocks the chair away. Rachel then backs him up and locks him to the top drawer of a filing cabinet.)
Rachel: Oh my God. Did you talk to him?
Ross: Dad dad, please! As I was saying umm, Im Dr. Ross Geller. Uhh, and Im the best man. And uh, this marriage is doubly special for me umm, because not only is the groom my best friend but uh, the bride is my little sister. And, shes the greatest sister a guy could ask for. So if youd all please join me in raising a glass to the, the couple were here to celebrate. (Everyone does so.) To the Bings.
Rachel: Are you gonna... you're going to take Hugsy away from a little child?
Ross: (smiling to himself) Good. I'm just getting some coffee. So I'm alert for the wedding.
Joey: No way! Mr.Salty is a sailor, all right, he's got to be, like, thetoughest snack there is.
Ross: Yay! (To Carol) Seriously, our sex life I was thinking, maybe I dont know, we could try some-some new things. Yknow? For fun?
Joey: Yknow Terry, I-I dont really need to do this. I got my own cable TV series, (Pause) with a robot.
Jasmine: But you should probably talk to my roommate, because I told him and he knows Phoebe too.
Phoebe: Oh okay. All right, then I need to calm down a little.
Ross: Oh, no. At first I have to get you to agree. Then we'll see if she wants to come back.
Chandler: Worst porn ever! Worst porn ever! (Chandler starts to press buttons on the remote control, frantically.)
Ross: (To Phoebe) Im sorry. Ugh, Pheebs, you were, you were right about her. Yknow, she did try to use sex as a weapon! Yeah, I hurt my back a little.
Joey: Have a seat. (Mike sits on his bed, and Joey towers over him. He starts talking in an Italian godfather-type voice) Last night, I tried to welcome you into my family... and instead, you disrespect me... (shakes his head) I cannot allow this.
Joey: (picks up the phone) Hello? Yeah, this is Joey Tribbiani... Oh, hi! Well, I'm glad you liked my letter... No my mommy and daddy aren't home right now... (looks puzzled) Okay, bye bye. (hangs up) (to himself) She was nice!
Ross: I�m serious. C�mon, you should go. Here. (shoves her outside, while she tries to stay) No, uh-uh, just go.
Monica:: Honey look we can do something else, do you want me to get into the tub and thrash.
Chandler: It is starting to get dark out there.
Rachel: To get you to make out with him!!!
Phoebe: What happened to the intimate dinner party?
[cut to Phoebe Sr.s house, from the last episode]
(Joey starts to giggle.)
Phoebe: Im so, so, so sorry, Joey. I definitely am gonna see youre play. I swear youre play is very important to us, thank you for your patience. Youre play is the next play is the next play Im gonna see.
(She throws her bag inside, and starts to climb through the window. She gets halfway in and the window slams shut on her butt.)
Monica: It needs to go about 20 blocks to the left!
Chandler: (To Monica) Of course it is. (Mouths to Ross) Wowwhoa!
Earl: Okay, I dont need any toner because Im going to kill myself.
[Cut to the rest of the gang sitting low on the couch and craning their necks to watch the interview.]
Joey: Oh anyway, I just wanted to say how wonderful I think you are.
Joey: (to her) Oh, hey Katie! Everyone, this is Katie.
Precious: I mean, what the hell am I supposed to do now?
Rachel: Monica and Chandler are really moving in here and I have to move out and everything is changing.
Monica: Well, I want he baby to come out all cute and fat!
Monica: Thank you. Rachel, can I talk to you outside for a sec?
Ross: Yeah, uh, uh, ok, there's this great rare bookstore on Madison Avenue. You know what? She loves architecture, you know what you should do? You should take a walk down fifth to the Saint Patrick's Cathedral and there there's this great little pastry shop that she'd love.
Monica: Oh my God! (She goes to hug him, stops short, and hits him on the shoulder.) Where the hell have you been?!!
Monica: I... I'm sorry, did you say something? I can't hear through all this damned hair! (Tries to move her huge hair away from the phone, in vain)
Joey: (on the tape) All right back off! I gotta gun! I'm not afraid to use it!
(They start making out again, and it takes Joey trying to enter to stop them.)
(They walk to the table, but Rachel suddenly gasps. Sitting there is mr Zellner, her boss from her current job at Ralph Lauren.)
Monica: (on phone) Okay, great! Bye. (Hangs up as Chandler enters.) So guess whos coming to Thanksgiving dinner?
Rachel: Ohh, Phoebe, what am I going to do?
Hillary: Would you like to move over to the couch?
Hillary: Are you going to eat that bread?
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's room, they've pretty much consumed the entire mini-bar. Needless to say, they're feeling no pain and are still playing blackjack.]
Amy: um... listen, I couldn't help but overhear... 'cause I was trying to... Listen, let me do this alright? I really wanna help you guys out, and plus Rachel's been so wonderful to me... (looks at hem pleadingly)
Ray: And this is Duncan (points to the cameraman) and Erin, theyre gonna help us out with the audition. So uh, lets get the camera rolling.
Ross: So I guess were back to uh, Baby Girl.
(Joey tries to pull back at all his might.)
CHANDLER: No, Eddie likes to keep it over there.
(Rachel runs into the airport, trying to catch Ross, moving people out of the way.)
Joey: Oh my God, is she going back to him?
MONICA: Alright. If you guys don't want it to be special, fine. You can throw any kind of party you want.
JOEY: Yeah, and when you do, he'll be lucky to have you.
Janine [to Chandler]: Hey.
Young Ethan: Well, think about it. It's always on the news. 'A man is being held up, at gunpoint.' 'Tourists are being terrorised, at gunpoint.' And I just kept thinking: why does people continue to go there? (He checks his watch.) Oh, ah. I should go.
Joey: Ah. (Joey walks to Chandlers bag by getting as far away from Chandlers bed as possible.)
Phoebe: No, you can�t go. No-no-no, I can�t hold this table on my own. If they ask me to move, I cave.
Monica: Oh y'know what? If you're gonna be acting like this all night, I really, I don't even want to be around you.
Joey: No, no, no I need a good lie to explain why I wasn't at a work thing today.
Ross: Oh, great. It's starting to rain, that will make it easy to get a cab.
Monica: Hey, it is unreasonable to expect a child to wait for a light bulb to cook brownies! (She goes to the attic.)
Monica: Come on Phoebe, lets go! Come on, its time to get serious, huddle up. Joey, keep your head in the game.
Rachel: I need to talk to you!
Phoebe: Okay. (on phone) Ooh, Im setting the phone down. (does so) But Im still here! Just dont go anywhere Im still here. (starts to put on the sweater) Dont-dont switch or anything, cause Im, Im right here. (She has pulled the sweater over her head, but her head is stuck in a sleeve.) Just one sec. One sec! One second!! (She is now frantically trying to get the sweater on, as Monica returns from the bathroom.) Wait! One second! Just
Phoebe: Yeah, well, everybody does! Im a really cool person. And y'know you had 29 years to find that out, but you didnt even try! Y'know what, you walked out on me, and Im just, Im gonna do the same thing to you.
Ross: Well, you need something to make this day special? Hello! You-you-you have the most special thing of all! You are marrying the woman you love.
Ross: It'll be nice to get this off finally, won't it? Yes it will. (Marcel resists) Or we can leave it on for now, that's fine.
Chandler: What 'not work out'? I'm seeing her again on Thursday. Didn't you listen to the story?
Ross: Really? That would be great. I mean, I have to do something, she kinda teased me about how I dress.
Phoebe: Oh, hi, Mrs. Waltham. I need to speak with ether one of the best men, or Rosss sister Monica.
Rachel: Do you want to put the book in the freezer?
Rachel: Well, remember how we were too drunk to remember anything the night we were married?
[Cut back to Monica and Chandler telling Phoebe and Joey the story.]
Chandler: (pauses as he struggles with what he has to say) Youre a little high maintenance.
(They start to kiss, and Ross rushes into the office to break it up.)
Bonnie: (to Ross) Shoot! I cant go, I have to work!
Phoebe: Oh, I know a way that you can decide! All right, I'm going to ask you a series of questions and you answer as quickly as you can.
Robert: Ah, good to meet you. Robert.
Chandler: (to Ross) Hey, so can you make it on Friday?
Monica: Maybe Joey doesnt have to give you the money, TV stars have assistants right?
Joey: She made me switch to light Mayo. Thats it! Thats all I got! And, you know what? It tastes the same and my pants fit better!
Chandler: Were not gonna lose to girls.
Joey: Thats what that was?! Cause that other thing? I thought you were on to something, but it did nothing for me.
Monica: Let me try. (Gets up to join them.)
Monica: Well, if you dont have anything to copy, why are you going down there?
Monica: (in the hallway) So, where do you want to go?
MONICA: That's Great. You know we don't need to talk about this now. Really, I mean this is, is so way, way, way, in the future, I'm talkin' hovercrafts and apes taking over the planet.
[Scene: Classroom. Joey is writing his name on the board, but turns around before hes done which causes him to write his name with a downward curve, and he then underlines it, and draws the line right through his name.]