words in movies
Phoebe: Uh-huh, yeah thats too bad. I really want to go to his concert Friday night, but its totally sold out. I know! Why dont you meet him and get tickets?! If you get two Ill take you.
Mr. Geller: No! Thank you! (Hugs Chandler) Monica, and Ross! I dont know what Im gonna do about the two of you!
JOEY: I'm fine with it, I mean, if you're OK watching a video filled with two nippled people. [Chandler puts the tape in]
[Scene: Ross walks in the hallway to his apartment and stops in front of his own door. Now he hears two recorders playing a song. When he enters, Sandy and Joey are playing the recorder and Rachel listens.]
Ross: I can't belive you two had sex in her dream.
Chandler: We talked 'til like two. It was this perfect evening... more or less.
Chandler: Well maybe you're going about this the wrong way. You know I mean think about it. Single white male, divorced three times,two illegitimate children. The personal ad writes itself....
Joey: Yknow what I think? I think somebodys got a little crush on Casey. How bout I fix you two up? What do you think?
Ross: Youre gonna love me so much. I got Sting tickets!! (Holds up two.)
DUNCAN: Well, I've never told you this but, there were one or two times, back in college, when I'd get really drunk, go to a straight bar and wake up with a woman next to me. But I, I, I told myself it was the liquor and e-everyone experiments in college.
Phoebe: Well thats only two days away. What is the other option?
Monica: So wait, Rosss stuff is fine, but I have no memories because you wanted to keep the bottom two inches of your car away from water!!!
Rachel: No, I have two sisters. But one of them has a very masculine energy.
Ross: I bet two dollars. (throws it in)
Joey: Thank you all for coming. We're here today to pay respects to a wonderful agent and a beautiful woman... (Joey looks at the photograph) ..inside. As Estelle's only two clients we would like to say a few words. (Joey looks for his notes. The man next to him is chewing something.) Dude, where's my speech? (the man swallows something and looks at Joey.) That is entertaining. Al Zebooker everybody. (he applauds and Al shows that there's nothing left in his mouth.)
Chandler: Okay, I thought of the joke two months ago at lunch with Steve.
Monica: No fair. I don't even have one. How come they get two?
Chandler: Weirder than watching his two moms make out? (Monica nods in agreement.)
Rachel: Oh come on, what are you talking about? Youve got three years painting houses. Two whole summers at T.G.I. Fridays, come on!
Chandler: Theres gonna be a wedding. Youre gonna be the bride. Two hundred people are going to be looking at you in a clean white dress.
Ross: Why does Joanna need two assistants, how, how lazy is she?
Rachel: Oh, if I only want two kids, can I keep him for another year?
[Scene: The Medical Research office, Joey is there with Carl in the waiting room. Two identical twins come out and both wave by at the same time.]
Ross: Marcel, c'mere, c'mere. (He sits down and Marcel jumps down and sits beside him) Well buddy, this is it. There's just a coupla things I want to say. I'm really gonna miss you, and I'm never gonna forget about you. You've been more than just a pet to me, you've been more like a be- (Marcel climbs down and starts humping his leg) Okay, Marcel, please, could you leave my leg alone? Could you just stop humping me for two seconds?! Marcel, would- okay, just take him away. Just take him.
Ross: Yeah, its hard okay, I only have two spots left.
JOEY: Alright, you're on. I can take two minutes out of my day to kick your ass.
Erica: Well, there is a chance it's another guy. I mean, I have only ever been with two guys, but they sorta overlapped.
Ross: Yeah. Do that for another two hours, you might be where I am right about now. (He enters.)
(Just as they're about to leave, Gunther comes out of the back carrying two garbage bags. Larry sees this and stops him.)
Joey: Yeah. I'm thinking, if we put our heads together, between the two of us, we can break them up.
JOEY: It's my VISA bill. Envelope one of two. That can't be good.
Chandler: It's OK. It's OK. I was always rooting for you two kids to get together.
Phoebe: Have you two, you know... like... you know... you know... yet?
Monica: So I, I told Rachel it was just gonna be the two of us.
Rachel: Ohh... (Ross mouths HA-HA at Monica and takes two cookies and she looks at him angrily)
PHOEBE: Hey now you have two. [Chandler looks annoyed] Oh, now you have two.
Rachel: Me too. Oh, I'm just sorry I'm not gonna be around to watch you two attempt to handle this! Alright, I can't say goodbye to you guys again. I love you all so much.
Phoebe: All right, everyone calm down! Everyone calm down! I have something that I would like to say! Who here likes Ross? (Ross is the only one who raises his hand and Phoebe glares at him to put his hand back down.) Of course you don't like him! He-he didn't give you any money, he raised his own hand when I asked, "Who hear likes Ross," and he's wearing two nametags! (He takes one off.) I-I'll be honest with you guys, when I first met Ross I didn't like him at all! But then once I got to know him I saw that he's really sweet and caring and very generous. I mean, all I'm saying is don't judge Ross before you get to know him all right? I mean, I like all you guys now, but when I first meet you y'know Kurt, I thought, y'know abrasive drunk, umm Lola, mind numbingly stupid! And okay, you guys (She turns to an elderly gentleman and a 20 something woman, who're a couple.) (To the girl) Gold-digger, (To the old guy) cradle robbing perv! So, I think you all know what I mean.
Frannie: Are you kidding? I take credit for Paul. Y'know before me, there was no snap in his turtle for two years.
JOEY: But this is a two line part, it's like takin' a step backwards. I'm not gonna do this.
Judge: Well, based on what I heard, you two certainly dont qualify for an annulment. If you two dont want to be together youll have to file for divorce.
Sarah: So thats two boxes of the Holiday Macaroons. On behalf of the Brown Birds of America, I salute you. (Does the Brown Bird salute, she blows on a bird call, then holds her hand, palm facing out, next to her face, and then waves it like a bird flapping its wings.)
Mr. Waltham: (drunkenly) The next tour of the wine cellar will plan in two in-in minutes
Ross: Well, I think it's perfect. Y'know, it's just gonna be the two of us, she spent all day taking care of my monkey...
Monica: I need two. Im bringing Pete. My boyfriend. I have a boyfriend now!
Monica: Were going to Las Vegas to see your dad. Its time you two talked, and I want to get to know my father-in-law.
[Scene: Riff's, Phoebe is entering. Ursula returns with two plates of chicken, but she only has time to set one on the table, when...]
Dr. Long: Okay! All your tests look fine. Now, are you two interested in knowing the sex of the baby?
Monica: (grabbing the gift from him and opening it) Okay! There you go! It's two tickets to Vegas!
Erica: I don't think so. Although, they did mention something about two heartbeats. But I thought that was just mine and the baby's. They kept saying both heartbeats are really strong, and I thought well, that's good 'cause I'm having a baby.
Ross: Oh yeah, shes-shes amazing. And-and shes so much fun. And! Yknow what? When Im with her, Im fun! I even signed up for helicopter classes. (Chandler is shocked.) Shes leaving in two days, I dont have to do it.
(The scene on TV has changed to show two women, one is holding her hair.)
Pete: Well, if that were true, Id dating my Aunt Ruth. And the two times we went out were just plain awkward. (to Rachel) Come on, you think she should go out with me, dont you?
Monica: You'll be fine. Nah, you won't, but I'll be back in two minutes.
PHOE: Two.
Eric: In fact when we were building houses in Uruguay, we were, we were just two towns apart and we never met.
Eric: Its just so weird, two people look so much alike, and so different.
[Scene: The beach house, its the same scene from the end of last year, with Ross in front of the two doors of Rachels and Bonnies rooms, trying to decide which door to choose. He finally chooses the one his right and goes in.]
RACHEL: Ok, ok, ok, I will, I will, I, hey, I will clean the apartment for two months.
Joey: Because you two were having sex!
RACHEL: Two, two babies?
ROSS: Uhh, yeah. I mean, actually I kinda think that we'll have, we'll have two babies.
(Chandler nods along and they enter the whirlpool room and remove their robes. Only Chandler is lacking a certain item of clothing. You see this is a coed whirlpool, which means swimsuits, and in fact there are two women already there and Chandler didnt seem to wear his. Needless to say, everyone is shocked, including Chandler.)
Mr. Tribbiani: Joe, your dad's in love big time. And the worst part of it is, it's with two different women.
Monica: When two people finally realise their feelings for each other, and-and they talk for hours, and they-they learn all about the other person!
Monica: No, no its going to be great. Really! Mom, Dad, when I got married, one of the things that made me sure I could do it was the amazing example the two of you set for me. For that and so many other things I want to say thank you. I know I probably dont say it enough, but I love you. (Pretends to cry hoping her parents will join her.) When I look around this room, Im-Im saddened by the thought of those who could not be here with us. Nana, my beloved grandmother who would so want to be here, but she cant because shes dead. As is our dog Chi-Chi. I mean look how cute she is. (Holds up the picture and pretends to cry again). Was. (To an old man by the stage.) Do me a favor and pass this to my parents. Remember shes dead. Okay, her and Nana, gone. Wow! Hey does anybody remember when Debra Winger had to say goodbye to her children in Terms of Endearment? (Chandler covers his ears) Didnt see that? No movie fans?! You want to hear something sad? The other day I was watching 60 Minutes these orphans in Romania, who have been so neglected, they were incapable of love. (Waits for people to cry, but doesnt get any tears.) You people are made of stone! Heres to mom and dad! Whatever!
JOEY: How come you have two?
Chandler: OK, alright, last minute lesson, last minute lesson. (holds up two cards) Joey... three... eight. Eight... three. (Joey is unamused) Alright babe, deal the cards.
(Phoebe walks by, ignoring the two strangers.)
JOEY: Ross, listen. I got two words for you. Threesome.
Rachel: Well,sounds like you two have issues.
Chandler: Oh come on, it was so obvious! There was no chemistry between you two!
Agency guy: (to Erica) Well, then if there’s nothing else, then the two of us should talk.
JOEY: Alright. Cab driver number two?
MONICA: But you've only slept with two people.
Chandler: (nearly whispering) Oh dear God, there's two of them!
Chandler: Sounds like two people are really enjoying the Dewey decimal system.
MONICA: Oh, yay. Ok about that two.
Monica: Yeah, two hours, a lifetime thats the same.
RICHARD: Two.
Joey: Maybe you two should live together.
Fun Bobby: Hey, sorry I'm late. But my, uh, grandfather, he- died about two hours ago. But I-I-I couldn't get a flight out 'til tomorrow, so here I am!
Judge: Okay you two are asking the court for an annulment?
Rachel: Are you serious?! Chandler, we ate an entire cheesecake two days ago and you want more?
Chandler: I cant believe you didnt tell me! You know that the two pillars of marriage are openness and honesty!
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment.� Three pizza crusts, two bottle caps and the plastic tripod are left in the otherwise empty pizza box.� Mike is making hollow popping noises with his mouth.� He begins to speak, but stops and pops his lips a few more times and takes a drink.� Ross smiles as if he has thought of something to say, but then he stops and sinks back in a slump on the sofa.]
Joey: Why dont we just go on two.
Ross: Okay, (reading the card) Fonzy gives you two thumbs up, collect two cool points. Yeah.
(Joey stares at Chandler and Monica and finally puts two and two together. He gasps.)
Ross: (he picks up the ball) What do you think you learnt how to do in the last two minutes?? (he enters another room)
WEDDING PLANNER: All rightie, everybody look at me. Good. All right, its time. Bridesmaids and ushers let's see two lines, thank you.
Monica: Change! Okay, sit down. (Shows Paul in) Two seconds.
Ross: Is it? Feels like two.
Phoebe: Oh yknow whats sadder than this? Bambi. I cried for three days with that movie. No wait two! Because on the third day my mother killed herself so I was partly crying for that.
Monica: Its like two miles!
Chandler: Oh, hey, when she gets here, is it ok if I introduce you two as "my wife" and "the woman who's carrying my child"? (she's not amused) No? Divorce?
Janice: Okay, you know, one of two things is happening here. Either you're seeing somebody behind my back, which would make you the biggest jerk on the planet. Or, else you're pretending that you're seeing somebody, which just makes you so pathetic that I could start crying right here in the cereal aisle. So like which of these two guys do you want to be? (another guy walks by)
Chandler: Man, those two dogs are going at it!
Rachel: I have an extra ticket. An extra ticket. Not, two tickets, I have an extra ticket.
Ross: (to Joey) How 'bout instead you, go get changed! (to Chandler) You, give him back his underwear! I'm gonna go get a cab, and I want everyone down stairs in two minutes! Monica!