words in movies
Rachel: So, Im in my apartment doing the Soap Opera Digest crossword puzzle, and guess who the clue is for three down. (She hands the magazine to Joey.)
Joey: Remember what happened the last time I did an interview for them? I said I write a lot of my own lines, and then the writers got mad and made my character fall down the elevator shaft. So who knows what I might say this time.
Joey: (drinking a beer) Look at this clown! Just because hes got a bigger boat he thinks he can take up the whole river. (Yelling) Get out of the way jackass! (To Rachel) Who names their boat Coast Guard anyway?
(We see Joey who has puffed up his cheeks and Chandler nonchalantly reaches down and pinches Joeys nose shut. In a few seconds, Joey has to move because hes now forced to actually hold his breath.)
Rachel: (interrupting him) Hi! Im gal pal Rachel Green, and if you want the dirt, Im the one you come too. This might be Joeys baby (rubbing her stomach), who knows? Im just kiddingSeriously, (leans into the cassette recorder Shelley is using) gal pal Rachel Green.
Ross: (leaning into the recorder as well) Who just lost the respect of her unborn child.
The Interviewer: So it seems like you have a lot of friends, who would you say is your best friend?
[The next one is from Episode 512: The One With Chandlers Work Laugh, Joey and Phoebe are betting on who will reach the treat the fastest, the chick or the duck.]
Joey: Uh me? Gay? No! No. No, but I have a number of close friends who are. (Chandler and Ross look at each other.)
Monica: Oh God, stop with the plan! So what, so what you saw him with a girl? Who cares?! That doesn't mean anything! Now look, you're going to go out on a date with Danny and you're going to be so charming he's gonna forget all about that stupid subway girl.
Ross: You see this, this is a person who is ready to go. Phoebe you, oh, you are my star.
Rachel: That is great. Hey, yknow who doesnt have to job hunt? Ross. He works at the university.
Ross: Uh-ha, what about someone who looks like Rachel? (Russell glares at him.) I will think about the therapy.
Monica: Chandler, if you thought I was going to get you porn for Valentines Day (pulls a video out of a basket) you were right! Apparently, its about a young girl who moves to the big city, you know, in search of stardom, but ends up having sex with a lot of guys! Yeah, it got four starts! (looks closer) Oh, wait a minute. Those arent stars. Anyway, you want to take a look?
Jill: Who?!
Ross: I talked to Monica, look, I'm the one who made the choice. I'm the one who's making things change, so I should be the one to y'know, step back.
Monica: Okay, the reason why I asked you guys out to brunch today is because I have been doing some thinking about who should be my maid of honor.
Monica: All right, Im gonna go steam my wedding dress okay? Who wants the responsibility of making sure nothing happens to it?
Ursula: Who is it?
(She grabs his arm and drags him over to a table where three beautiful women are sitting. Now, Im going to go out on a limb and say that their names are Stephanie, Karin, and Meg. Okay, so I looked at the credits. Of course, only Meg is named later on, so Ill have to guess who is Stephanie and who is Karin. But, well cross that bridge when we come to it.)
Monica: Who wasn't invited to the wedding.
Ross: Oh absolutely! It has been in my family for generations, and every bride who has worn it has had a long and happy life.
Phoebe: Surprise! Look whos back!
JOEY: No, as part of the audition. See, I'm up for this part of this guy, who the main guy kisses.
[Scene: The Airport Ticket Counter, Monica and Chandler are standing in line behind another couple kissing who are next in line to be served.]
[Suddenly the door opens and Ross's mystery girl enters. I'll give you a hint to who it is: OH .MY .GAWD!! Uh-huh, it's Janice.]
Joey: (To Phoebe) Oh and uh the guy who got the Paris trip is at table four.
Phoebe: Yeah, its totally meant to be. (To Monica) Tell him who you originally wanted to hook up with that night.
Monica: Who the hell are you?!
Chandler: Who the hell is Carl?!
Ross: Y'know, hey! Youre the one who ended it, remember?
Joey: Yeah and the most important thing is that it wont be some like, stranger up there who barely knows you. Itll be me! And I swear Ill do a really good job. Plus, yknow I love you guys and-and it would really mean a lot to me.
Rachel: Who wrote it?
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. Phoebe just let David in who brought a bottle of wine.]
[Cut to Earls office, who is played by Jason Alexander, George from Seinfeld. They cut back and forth between Phoebes and Earls offices with each of their lines.]
Joey: Who cares?! You went behind my back! I would never do that to you!
Elizabeth: Who?
Ross: Going out with who?
Gunther: I thought you were Chandler. But umm, one of who is over there.
(They all laugh indifferently, except Chandler, whos a little angry.)
Ross: Who would you rather be Simon or Garfunkle?
Monica: It is so great to meet a guy who is smart and funny, and has an emotional age beyond, like eight.
Joey: (stomps on the footrest which pops Ross up into a sitting position) The trail from the woman you did it with to the woman you hope never finds out who did it! (slapping his hands with each word) You always have to think about the trail!
Phoebe: Um-hmm. Oh wait! This is Bonnie. (who has hair by the way)
Ross: Who gets whom. (They all look at him.) I dont know why I do that.
Monica: Wait a minute, why dont you just call Mark. (they both look up in shock) I mean, who says you have to sit here and wait for him, youve got to make stuff happen.
Monica: Well, Ive tried everything. I give up. I guess Im not gonna be the mom who makes the worlds best chocolate cookies. I do make the best duck confit with broccoli rabe. Kids love that right.
Rachel: Who are these men?
Joey: Who would you rather sleep with Monica or Rachel?
The Dry Cleaner: Who are you?
Joey: Bob? Who the hell's Bob?
Chandler: Who?
Phoebe: Wait, (grabs him) you know what, I got a little story. When I was in Junior High School I went through this period where I thought I was a witch. And there was this guidance counselor who said something to me, that I think will help you a lot. He said okay, 'you're not a witch you're just an average student.' See what I'm saying?
Ross: I was having a little chat with ah, Bonnie, and ah, guess what, she-she happened to bring up y'know, who was behind the um, whole head shaving idea, and now, who was it? Oh, thats right, thats right, it was you!
(Monica glares triumphantly across the room, scaring Rachel who also stands up.)
Monica: Its so good, that I feel really selfish about being the only one whos eating it, that I think we should have everyone taste how good it is. Especially Ross.
(Now they kiss passionately... and then Ross enters with Emma. They freeze, pull away and look at Ross who looks like he just can't believe what he's seeing. Joey straightens his shirt, and Rachel says I'm so-oo sorry, and presses her breasts together, just like Joey did before.)
Phoebe: Well, yknow I may have relatives in France who would know. My grandmother said she got the recipe from her grandmother, Nesele Tolouse.
Ross: Mon, look who I ran into! (Gestures towards Rachel.)
Joey: Who cares?! I-Ill make payments, whatever it takes, I want the Mr. Bowmont!!
Megan: So uh, whos your photographer?
Joey: Oh well, the little girl who lives here made me feel a lot better about the whole thing.
[Time Lapse, dinner has ended for everyone except Joey who looks like to have finished the turkey, until he turns the plate around and reveals he only ate one side.]
JOEY: OK, alright, the people who threw the water.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is introducing Phoebe, who is playing her guitar for the crowd.]
(Monica plays those words back in her mind and then smiles and runs to Chandler, who is twisting with joy. They hug.)
Ross: Who?
Rachel: Who?
Monica: So we can be friends who sleep together.
Rachel: What? Who?
Phoebe: Yeah, and maybe that youre a real (She says something in Italian, and it doesnt matter what she said. Its not important so I dont need everyone who speaks Italian telling me what she said.)
[Time Lapse: the crowd has left and only Mona, Monica, Joey, and Phoebe are still watching to see who will be able to move the others arm first. An event that has yet to happen.]
Richard: Who is it?
STEVE: How are you? Look, you guys wanna meet the group? Come on. So, are you one of the ones who fooled around with my dad?
Monica: Look, I know that you're in a place right now where you really need to hate Julie's guts, but she didn't do anything wrong. I mean, she was just a girl who met a guy, and now they go out. I really think that if you gave her a chance, you'd like her. Would you just give that a chance, for me?
Mr. Geller: Look, there are people like Ross who need to shoot for the stars, with his museum, and his papers getting published. Other people are satisfied with staying where they are- I'm telling you, these are the people who never get cancer.
The Smoking Woman: Who are you talking too?
Rachel: Who is it?
Joey: Who wants French toast?
Joey: What?! All rightHey! Dont look at me! Youre the one who wanted to come up and look for some stupid Burger King comet!
Phoebe: Okay, then you dont know what it feels like when one of them comes back. Do you? I believe this is my Mother. Even if Im wrong, who cares? Just be a friend. Okay? Be supportive.
(Ross is now preoccupied with the spider, and forgets that Rachel is still using the swing. While trying to get rid of the spider, he stands in front of Rachel, who bumps into him, throwing him on the ground again.)
Phoebe: Wait. Why was he yelling at her? Hes the one who slept with someone else.
(The unvoiced hissing continues. In alarm, Ross and Chandler look at the monkey, who is now in some distress.)
Joey: Hey, I wasn't the only one who looked like an idiot. All right? Remember when Ross tried to say, "Butternut squash?" And it came out, "Squatternut buash?"
Ross: No Joey! Look why dont, why dont we just let her decide? Okay? Hey-hey, well each go out with her one more time. And-and well see who she likes best.
Russell: (interrupting) Im sorry, is this the same Rachel whos name you said at the altar in the second marriage?
Phoebe: Ok, who wants to hear something ironic?
Chandler: Who?
Monica: Oh my God yes! Who is she?
Monica: Well, Rachel wants to take swing dance lessons. Which I think is a really stupid idea! It's dangerous, she's never gonna get what she wants, and who knows who she might (Turns to look at Ross) end up hurting.
Ross: Well you shouldnt be. Believe me I wouldnt want to be the guy whos up against you. (Chandler laughs.) I mean that doofus is going to lose!
Rachel: Okay, bla-bla-bla-bla!! Who is it?!
Joey: Well, I sorta am. I mean yeah, Im dating this girl whos also seeing another guy. But, I dont know, Im not to worried about it.
Rachel: I don't think he's the one who needs help.
Helena: Im not very fond of New York. Queens I like. (Noticing Monicas ring.) Ooh, what is this sparkle something! (Shows the audience who woos.) Honey! Huh?
MONICA: Who has her own little desk when Roland's not there.
Joey: (pretending to be an announcer) And the winner is Joey Tribbiani! (He then gets excited and goes over to the counter to practice his acceptance speech using a bottle of maple syrup as the award.) Oh Wow! I honestly never expected this. I uh, I didnt prepare a speech. But umm, Id like to thank (Rachel enters quietly) my parents, whove always been there for me. Id also like to thank my friends, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, Rachel
Joey: Whos birthday party?
Rachel: Well look whos here!
Customer: Who is it?
Woman: Im sorry, who are you?
Monica: (turning a light on) Who is that?!
Chandler: Well, no, although I did have an imaginary friend, who... my parents actually preferred.
Phoebe: Maybe your resolution is to not make fun of your friends, especially the ones who may soon be flying you to Europe for free on their own plane.
(Cut to Phoebe who is in the living room, still on the phone.)
Monica: Who? I mean have you seen a car come by here in the last hour and a half? I think we should call Ross, maybe he can get a car and come pick us up.
[cut to Ross who walks up to Rachel who is eating a baked pretzel.]
Phoebe: Well, one of you has to take the first step! And it should be you, because shes the one whos leaving. Its harder for her!