words in movies
[Scene: A beauty parlour, Rachel is getting a manicure while Chandler, yes Chandler, is getting a petticure (Does that scare you that I know those terms? Well, it scares me.).]
Chandler: Y'know, I can't believe I'm getting my nails done! And you said it was gonna be fun! (pause) Which it kinda is. Also, you said there would be other guys here. There are no other guys here!
Rachel: Chandler, dont worry! This doesnt make you any less of a guy! (Chandler starts blowing on his fingernails like women do.) That does! (Chandler stops blowing.) What am I sitting on? (She looks and finds a huge nail.) I hate to think what this woman was scratching when this broke off.
Chandler: Hey, you know who used to have nails like that?
Woman: OH MY GAWD!! (Yep, you guessed it. Its Janice.)
Monica: Joey let me ask you a question. What does this light switch do?
Monica: Didnt it drive you crazy to have a switch and not know what it did?
Monica: They wouldnt have put it there if it didnt do something! How can you not care?
Rachel: Well, heres another question for ya. Uhh, do you know what that silver knob on the toilet does?
Rachel: Okay, good. Now that since you know, when you come over would you mind actually using it?
Monica: How have you been?
Janice: I just came up to say, "Hi!" Hi! (to Chandler) And you, sweetie, Ill see you tonight.
Phoebe: What?! I thought you were crazy about her!
Joey: So what are you doing bringing her here?! Theres people here!
Rachel: You are not. You have never been able to break up with her.
Emily: I cant believe you really walk alone here! I mean, you hear such stories about New York.
Emily: So how are you? Ive been meaning to ring you ever since I arrived but umm, well, Ive been rather busy.
Devon: Do you realise that we have not seen each other since the night of that U2 concert?
Emily: Oh my God. I think youre right.
Liam: (puts his arm around her) Well, actually the last time you and I saw each other was that morning.
Ross: Oh, Liam. So uh, what, were you guys playing soccer or somethingor should I call it (In an English accent) football?
Liam: In fact were playing a game at the park tomorrow. Youre welcome to play too if you want.
Emily: Well I mean, youre American to start with. You dont even have rugby here.
Devon: So good then! Well see you at Riverside Park at 2:00! Cheers!
Chandler: Yes, I-I know that you do, but I think one of the reasons people were complaining though, was that they paid to hear the actor sing Old Man River.
Janice: Oh, too soon, too schmoon. Face it honey, I am not letting you get away this time.
Chandler: Okay, could you just stop talking for a second? (Thinks) Yemen. Thats right, yes, Im being transferred to Yemen!
Joey: (to Rachel) I bet I stopped listening before you did.
Joey: Dude, youre not even man enough to order the channel that carries the sport.
Chandler: Yknow uh, you didnt really have to help me pack.
Janice: Ohh, well when you said all you were going to be doing between now and the time you leave is packing, you didnt really leave me much choice. Did you?
Joey: Nope. (To Ross) Man look at this! Ross, I cant believe you said youd play rugby. I mean look how brutal this is!
Ross: Thats cause-cause youre moms dog kept-kept looking at me.
Joey: Ross! (Laughs) Theyre gonna kill you!
Phoebe: Well, why are you doing this anyway?
Ross: Well, you shouldve seen the guy that she used to go out with. I mean, hes like Joe Rugby.
Phoebe: Youre kidding! And he plays rugby?! Thats so funny. (Realises) Ohh! I see how you did that. All right.
Rachel: (starts laughing, Ross stares at her) Im sorry. Im sorry. Youre right, you are a tough guy. Youre the toughest palaeontologist I know.
Joey: Well, maybe thats because youre closer to you. So you look bigger to you from where you are.
Joey: I totally dont know what youre talking about.
Ross: Youll see.
Liam: You dont say! (We see Ross who is hopping about with the ball and spikes it in his face.)
Rachel: You are not going to believe it! Joshua came into work today, and guess what happened?
Monica: He asked you out?!
Chandler: Yknow you, really didnt have to take me to the airport.
Janice: Oh please. Every moment is precious. Yknow? Besides, somebody had to ride in that other taxi with the rest of your luggage, and your friends dont really seem to care too much that youre leaving.
Janice: On no! No! Its not good-bye, Im not leaving until you get on that plane.
Chandler: What would you give to a kid if he wanted a ticket to play with?
Ticket Counter Attendant: Are you travelling with a child?
Chandler: No. All right, yknow what, shes (Points to Janice) gonna think that Im handing you a credit card, but what Im really gonna do is hand you a library card.
Janice: Whats the matter? Is something wrong? Do you have to stay?
Phoebe: No offence but, yknow sometimes its hard to understand you, yknow with the accent, so
Ross: Did you see me? I was pretty good, huh? That is one fun game!
Ross: (to Emily) Hey, could you do me a favour? Could you just grab me a bottle of water?
Emily: Ross, they are killing you out there!
Phoebe: Shes right! You have to stop!
Joey: Dude, if you go back out there, youre gonna be Dead Ross!
Emily: All right, all right, if you insist on doing this, at least let me help you.
Emily: No. Thats not what Im saying. I just may know a few things that might help you inflict some pain.
Emily: And uh, Liam, Liams got bad knees. You hit him right and hell go down like a lamp.
Emily: I dont care! You just get him!
Monica: Oh, just some pictures I made and hung up. I thought theyd brighten up the place. They do dont you think?
Rachel: And did you?!
Phoebe: Now, are you sure you dont want to go see a doctor?
Ross: No, not you. (Emily gets it.)
Emily: You were amazing out there.
Emily: You really enjoyed yourself didnt you?
Ross: Please! Are you kidding? I-I hurt three huge men, I gave a guy a bloody noseI mean I-Im not proud of it but, I really am. And its all because of you, wonderful, amazing you.
Emily: I think youve got concussion.
Ross: No, no, Im serious. Thank you.
Emily: Youre welcome. (She hugs him tightly and he winces.) Im sorry. Did I hurt you?
Ross: Its worth the pain. (She goes to hug him again.) Yknow what, you know what? Its not.
Janice: Oh, my Bing-a-ling. Ill wait for you. Do you even know how long youre going to be gone?
Janice: Oh. Well, Ill right you everyday. (Reading the address) 15 Yemen Road, Yemen.
Chandler: Janice! There you are! There you are! I had to have one last kiss, and also-also you said that you were going to leave right after I got on the plane!
Janice: No! No! I wanna see you take-off.
Chandler: Well, I then guess Im going to Yemen! Im going to Yemen! (To this old woman also going to Yemen.) When we get to Yemen, can I stay with you?
Phoebe: (writing frantically) You guys, Im sorry, could you please talk a little slower?
Monica: What are you trying on now?
Chandler: I dont suck. Its sucks. You suck.
Phoebe: Yknow! You dont make a very good first impression.
Rachel: Oh, yeah. Definitely you, Pheebs.
Chandler: Yeah, I know, for a really great stew you just y'know, stick your head in between em.
Joey: Oh, ain't that nice? The three of you trying on slutty lingerie together.
Ross: He said he liked that!! Oh youre right, youre right. Im sorry.
Phoebe: You wanna be on my list too? Keep talking! Has anyone seem my list by the way?
Rachel: Okay Ross, can I uh, can I ask you something?
Rachel: You have a roommate?!
RACHEL: Hi. Well hey, you don't - you don't think they're kind of cool?
Ross: You know, I hate to lecture you guys, but it's kinda disgraceful, that a group of well-educated adults and Joey can't name all the states. Did you ever see a map, or one of those round, colorful things called "a globe?" Hmm?
Chandler: Really?! I-I thought you werent looking for something serious? I thought you were looking for some kind of a fling.
Monica: Hi! I'm Monica and I'm gonna be singing "Delta Dawn""Delta Dawn, what's that flower you have on? Could it be a faded rose from days gone by? ..."
Chandler: (high pitched) No you know I dont mind.
Ross: Rachel! What are you doing here?
Ross: Let me see, I gotta see, I gotta see. Oh, a head. Oh, it's, it's huge. Carol, how are you doing this?
Rachel: Oh, I am, my side still hurts from when you crashed into me yesterday.
Ross: (to the guard) Dont sweat it, Ive got this section covered. Yeah, in fact Ive got this little baby (Turns on a mini-flashlight) to shine in peoples eye(The guard walks away)Okay, see you later.
Ross: Yknow what? I can easily get out of this, but there is a chance you can get very, very hurt!
Joey: Well if its free food, how come youre charging me for it?
Rachel: And did you notice...? (She spreads her thumb and index finger.)
Rachel: Whatd you get?
Monica: Maybe he's bothering you so much because he likes you. It's like in first grade when Skippy Langwild always pushed me on the playground because he secretly had a crush on me?
Ross: You see this, this is a person who is ready to go. Phoebe you, oh, you are my star.
Jill: You stop!
Ross: No, you stop!
Joey: (picks up the phone) Hello? Yeah, this is Joey Tribbiani... Oh, hi! Well, I'm glad you liked my letter... No my mommy and daddy aren't home right now... (looks puzzled) Okay, bye bye. (hangs up) (to himself) She was nice!
Mr. Geller: Well, I just wanted to make sure you were okay.
Ross: (pause) No. But... it only has to happen once. Look, you and I both know we are perfect for each other, right? I mean... so, the only question is... are you attracted to me?
Jill: No you stop!
Charity guy: Wow! Are you here to make another donation the same day? I don’t think that that’s ever happened before.
Chandler: (to another couple) Uh, excuse me? Could you take a picture of us?
Rachel: Here, kitty-kitty. Here kitty-kitty. Where did you go, little kitty-kitty-kitty? Here kitty-kitty-kitty-kitty...
RACHEL: Mom, would you relax. That was 10 blocks from here and, the, the woman was walking alone at night, I would never do that. Mom, c'mon, stop worrying. This is a safe street, this is a safe building, there's nothing [a pigeon flies in the window and lands on the table] OH MY GOOOD, oh my God, oh I gotta go, I gotta go, I gotta go. [hangs up] OK, that's fine, you just read the paper, I'm gonna get a pot, it's not for you. [grabs a pot and lid] OK, that's fine, read the Family Circus, enjoy the gentle comedy. [puts pot over the pigeon] Aaahh, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, aaaaahh. [knock at the door] It's open you guys.
Chandler: (picks up the phone) All right, you want to see if the joke stealer will let us watch the show at his place?
Phoebe: Look, I feel really bad about how I freaked you out before, so I called the father and asked him to meet you here so you can tell him. Go!
Ross: (annoyed) O-kay... I mean, don't I deserve anything? I mean, a few tears, a cursory hug? (Joey gives Ross a hug) NOT FROM YOU! (Joey lets go)
JOEY: Woah, woah, woah, you have a date?
Rachel: Oh, y'know Joey, you are sick!
Mike: I have a question I need to ask you.
RACH: [sees his coat on] Where you goin'?
Monica: Yes, but you cannot tell anyone! No one knows!
Jill: You think so too?
Rachel: You know what?
Chandler: (spotting her) Oh-hey-hey-hey! There you are!
Susan: What, you don't think they can hear sounds in there?
Phoebe: Well why dont you use your key?
Gunther: Youre paying for that.
Ross: Yeah, uh, uh, ok, there's this great rare bookstore on Madison Avenue. You know what? She loves architecture, you know what you should do? You should take a walk down fifth to the Saint Patrick's Cathedral and there there's this great little pastry shop that she'd love.
Joshua: Because I-I like you.
Pete: I told you, were adding new operators all the time. Could we concentrate on my training?
Ross: Yknow what I think it is? I think youve made such a nice home for her over the last nine months that she just doesnt want to leave.
Rachel: (entering) Joey, what are you doing with the bag? You're audition is not until tomorrow.
Chandler: I can't believe you did this. (Walks toward the door)
Monica: Okay, if you really wanna have sex
Phoebe: But they shouldn't happen, you know what, you're, you're in a terrible, terrible business. Oh God, I don't wanna be the person who makes your face look like that.
Monica: You know, they're not actually supposed to have... (Ross looks at her sheepishly) I'll work on the lumps. Joey, you're going home, right?
Phoebe: Oh, wait, let me get you another glass. That's been sitting out.
Rachel: All right, Im sorry. Im sorry I didnt tell you but you were so mad already!
Monica: Well, I'm sorry, but Chandler and I could really use a weekend away. You know, to reconnect... emotionally.
SCOTT: Where do you work?
Phoebe: Thanks. Okay, now go away so we can talk about you.
Chandler: So you didn't uh, choose Ross before me.
Joey: Its not what you said. Its the way you said it Oh My God, Im a woman!!!
Rachel: Oh Ross, hi! Hey, how are ya? There you are!
Amy: You know what? When I moved in here I thought: This is gonna be so great. Just us sisters, back together again like when we were kids, except without that stupid Jill... Oh! Who has gotten fat by the way...
Rachel: You were with Kenny today, werent you?
Monica: Are you kidding me?! Is this; is this turning you on?
Joey: Yeah you got 5 years left!
Monica: Nononononono. Think who you're dealing with here. I mean, I'm not like you. I-I can't even stand in front of a tap class.
Ross: Yeah, not as much as you used to love to play uncooked batter eater.
Joey: (on tape) Okay, so say hi to my friend and tell him that you like the hat.
Rachel: Thank you. I yeah.
Chandler: Are there no conscious men in the city for you two?
Ross: O is for "oh, wow!" The V is for this very surprising turn of events, which I'm still fine with by the way. E is for how extremely normal I find it. That you two are together. And now one day you might get married and have children of your own.
Joey: Come on! Youre good with kids. Theyre just crazy on Halloween. Yknow, theyre all greedy and hopped up on sugar!
Ross: Thats all right, we-we dont need you. In fact, hey Im over it already.
MRS. GELLER: Jack. Could you come in here for a moment? NOW!
Chandler: Hey! (Joey doesn't look up, but gestures 'wait a minute' with his finger while he finishes reading the article. Chandler waits for Joey to finish.) I need you to set me up for a joke. Later, when Monica is around, I need you to ask me about fire trucks.
Rachel: Oh, this is great! I am gonna call him right now! (Jumps up.) Oh, thank you!
Ross: Thats correct! This is an audio question, what do you do when the baby makes this sound? (Makes a sound like someone is choking a cat.)
Rachel: She asked-asked you out again?
Phoebe: Okay but thats why you have to buy it, so it can fulfil its Christmas destiny, otherwise there gonna throw it into the chipper. Tell him, Joey
Ross: I would, but I bruise like a peach. Besides, y�you know, everything is gonna be fine. The baby�s sleeping.
Jill: You dont want him, but you dont want me to have him?
Phoebe: Okay. Okay, let's say I bought a really great pair of shoes. Do you know what I'd hear, with every step I took? 'Not-mine. Not-mine. Not-mine.' And even if I was happy, okay, and, and skipping- 'Not-not-mine, not-not-mine, not-not-mine, not-not-mine'...
Rachel: Well, what are you guys doing tomorrow night?
Phoebe: (To Rachel and Ross) Well, do you think I should propose?
Rachel: Im not telling you what to do! I am telling you what not to do!
Amy: Well, if I had told you, then it wouldn't have been surprise, now would it?
Joey: Hey-hey-hey, hey! You cant. Okay? Ever!
Rachel: Yes! I will! Absolutely! (She takes out his license and her license and holds them face to face with each other. She then proceeds to act like Dark Helmut in Spaceballs, and mimic a conversation between the two of them.) Hello, Rachel. Hi, Joshua. I left my wallet here on purpose. Really? Yes, I just wanted to see you again. Oh, Im glad. Rachel, Id like to say something to you. Yes? How you doin?
Joey: Oh no-no Rach, please, dont be sorry. Okay? Dont be sorry. (They hug again.) Yknow I was only kidding you.
Monica: Thats Phoebe! Where did you get that?
Phoebe: (interrupting) What are you doing?!! Why are you defending him?! Just get me another doctor! One who is not crazy and who is not Fonzie!
Ross: Then where the hell have you been?!
Joey: Oh-whoa-hey, dude, what are you doing?!
Ross: Yknow, youre right. Thank you.