words in movies
[Scene: A beauty parlour, Rachel is getting a manicure while Chandler, yes Chandler, is getting a petticure (Does that scare you that I know those terms? Well, it scares me.).]
Chandler: Y'know, I can't believe I'm getting my nails done! And you said it was gonna be fun! (pause) Which it kinda is. Also, you said there would be other guys here. There are no other guys here!
Rachel: Chandler, dont worry! This doesnt make you any less of a guy! (Chandler starts blowing on his fingernails like women do.) That does! (Chandler stops blowing.) What am I sitting on? (She looks and finds a huge nail.) I hate to think what this woman was scratching when this broke off.
Chandler: Hey, you know who used to have nails like that?
Woman: OH MY GAWD!! (Yep, you guessed it. Its Janice.)
Monica: Joey let me ask you a question. What does this light switch do?
Monica: Didnt it drive you crazy to have a switch and not know what it did?
Monica: They wouldnt have put it there if it didnt do something! How can you not care?
Rachel: Well, heres another question for ya. Uhh, do you know what that silver knob on the toilet does?
Rachel: Okay, good. Now that since you know, when you come over would you mind actually using it?
Monica: How have you been?
Janice: I just came up to say, "Hi!" Hi! (to Chandler) And you, sweetie, Ill see you tonight.
Phoebe: What?! I thought you were crazy about her!
Joey: So what are you doing bringing her here?! Theres people here!
Rachel: You are not. You have never been able to break up with her.
Emily: I cant believe you really walk alone here! I mean, you hear such stories about New York.
Emily: So how are you? Ive been meaning to ring you ever since I arrived but umm, well, Ive been rather busy.
Devon: Do you realise that we have not seen each other since the night of that U2 concert?
Emily: Oh my God. I think youre right.
Liam: (puts his arm around her) Well, actually the last time you and I saw each other was that morning.
Ross: Oh, Liam. So uh, what, were you guys playing soccer or somethingor should I call it (In an English accent) football?
Liam: In fact were playing a game at the park tomorrow. Youre welcome to play too if you want.
Emily: Well I mean, youre American to start with. You dont even have rugby here.
Devon: So good then! Well see you at Riverside Park at 2:00! Cheers!
Chandler: Yes, I-I know that you do, but I think one of the reasons people were complaining though, was that they paid to hear the actor sing Old Man River.
Janice: Oh, too soon, too schmoon. Face it honey, I am not letting you get away this time.
Chandler: Okay, could you just stop talking for a second? (Thinks) Yemen. Thats right, yes, Im being transferred to Yemen!
Joey: (to Rachel) I bet I stopped listening before you did.
Joey: Dude, youre not even man enough to order the channel that carries the sport.
Chandler: Yknow uh, you didnt really have to help me pack.
Janice: Ohh, well when you said all you were going to be doing between now and the time you leave is packing, you didnt really leave me much choice. Did you?
Joey: Nope. (To Ross) Man look at this! Ross, I cant believe you said youd play rugby. I mean look how brutal this is!
Ross: Thats cause-cause youre moms dog kept-kept looking at me.
Joey: Ross! (Laughs) Theyre gonna kill you!
Phoebe: Well, why are you doing this anyway?
Ross: Well, you shouldve seen the guy that she used to go out with. I mean, hes like Joe Rugby.
Phoebe: Youre kidding! And he plays rugby?! Thats so funny. (Realises) Ohh! I see how you did that. All right.
Rachel: (starts laughing, Ross stares at her) Im sorry. Im sorry. Youre right, you are a tough guy. Youre the toughest palaeontologist I know.
Joey: Well, maybe thats because youre closer to you. So you look bigger to you from where you are.
Joey: I totally dont know what youre talking about.
Ross: Youll see.
Liam: You dont say! (We see Ross who is hopping about with the ball and spikes it in his face.)
Rachel: You are not going to believe it! Joshua came into work today, and guess what happened?
Monica: He asked you out?!
Chandler: Yknow you, really didnt have to take me to the airport.
Janice: Oh please. Every moment is precious. Yknow? Besides, somebody had to ride in that other taxi with the rest of your luggage, and your friends dont really seem to care too much that youre leaving.
Janice: On no! No! Its not good-bye, Im not leaving until you get on that plane.
Chandler: What would you give to a kid if he wanted a ticket to play with?
Ticket Counter Attendant: Are you travelling with a child?
Chandler: No. All right, yknow what, shes (Points to Janice) gonna think that Im handing you a credit card, but what Im really gonna do is hand you a library card.
Janice: Whats the matter? Is something wrong? Do you have to stay?
Phoebe: No offence but, yknow sometimes its hard to understand you, yknow with the accent, so
Ross: Did you see me? I was pretty good, huh? That is one fun game!
Ross: (to Emily) Hey, could you do me a favour? Could you just grab me a bottle of water?
Emily: Ross, they are killing you out there!
Phoebe: Shes right! You have to stop!
Joey: Dude, if you go back out there, youre gonna be Dead Ross!
Emily: All right, all right, if you insist on doing this, at least let me help you.
Emily: No. Thats not what Im saying. I just may know a few things that might help you inflict some pain.
Emily: And uh, Liam, Liams got bad knees. You hit him right and hell go down like a lamp.
Emily: I dont care! You just get him!
Monica: Oh, just some pictures I made and hung up. I thought theyd brighten up the place. They do dont you think?
Rachel: And did you?!
Phoebe: Now, are you sure you dont want to go see a doctor?
Ross: No, not you. (Emily gets it.)
Emily: You were amazing out there.
Emily: You really enjoyed yourself didnt you?
Ross: Please! Are you kidding? I-I hurt three huge men, I gave a guy a bloody noseI mean I-Im not proud of it but, I really am. And its all because of you, wonderful, amazing you.
Emily: I think youve got concussion.
Ross: No, no, Im serious. Thank you.
Emily: Youre welcome. (She hugs him tightly and he winces.) Im sorry. Did I hurt you?
Ross: Its worth the pain. (She goes to hug him again.) Yknow what, you know what? Its not.
Janice: Oh, my Bing-a-ling. Ill wait for you. Do you even know how long youre going to be gone?
Janice: Oh. Well, Ill right you everyday. (Reading the address) 15 Yemen Road, Yemen.
Chandler: Janice! There you are! There you are! I had to have one last kiss, and also-also you said that you were going to leave right after I got on the plane!
Janice: No! No! I wanna see you take-off.
Chandler: Well, I then guess Im going to Yemen! Im going to Yemen! (To this old woman also going to Yemen.) When we get to Yemen, can I stay with you?
Monica: You used to tell girls you were a Kennedy. (being sat down) Ooh, uh, thanks. Wow, little tight, isn�t it? How d�you get a bigger table? You-you had a big table, but they made you move. Huh-huh, shut up Monica. Whoo, I suppose that Chandler will have the smoked duck.
Joey: Yes, now is when you swoop! You gotta make sure that when Paolo walks out of there, the first guy Rachel sees is you, She's gotta know that you're everything he's not! You're like, like the anti-Paolo!
Janice: Oh, this should be easy. I have a very wide pelvis. You remember Chandler.
Monica: Yeah, I'm sure your ex-wife will be more than happy to move to another country so you can patch things up with your new wife.
Male Jeweler: Okay. (Holds out the ring, deadpan.) Will you marry me?
Cheryl: Oh, yeah. Oh, you know, that's too bad that didn't work out.
Ross: (entering) Hey, you guys!
Joey: Hey, here you go. (Hands her another one.)
Chandler: But you come first!
Charlie: We'll see you, guys! (she goes)
Ross: How do you feel about all this?
Rachel: No you dont know why!
Ross: Oh, that's not what you want...
Joey: yeah but she should remember sleeping with me I am very memorable, you guys know.
Phoebe: Yeah. I actually am, yeah. Y'know life-lifes gonna had you all kinds of stuff, y'know you learn your little lessons and hopefully you grow. Wanna hear a new song?
Phoebe: You like Joey?
Ross: Oh, guys, this is fun, isn't it? You know? Just the four of us. Just hangin'.
Ross: Okay. Okay. Yknow what? If you want to, we can do it one more time. I mean Id-Id be okay with that. In fact, I have some time right now.
Zack: (shaking Monica's hand) You too.
Emily: Oh my God! What are you doing here? (They hug)
Joey: Sandy! Hi! C'mon in! (She enters, followed by a young boy and a younger girl)...You brought your kids.
Rachel: Oh, God, do you think she heard? It would be so bad if she heard!
Phoebe: This is madness. It's madness, I tell you, for the love of God, Monica, don't do it!! ...Thank you.
Ross: Cassie, how you-how you doin on that hot dog.
Chandler: You don't like him.
Rachel: Yeah. It was the weirdest thing. Zelner called me and he said we'll do everything we can to get you back. And that I should thank some Ron... I don't even know what department that guy's in.
ROSS: Would you look at that guy, I mean how long has he been talking to her. It's like, back off buddy she's a waitress not a geisha.
Ross: You know, if it�s meant to be, I�ll guess it. Bye, bye.
Phoebe: I mean I guess, I just have to... tell David that nothing can happen between us. Unless I don't... You know, complicated moral situation, no right, no wrong...
Phoebe: Remember how you said you were really dense about poetry? Oh. (hugs her)
ROSS: Thank you Gunther. We didn't want to have to go and do that.
Charlie: (smiling) Rachel... I heard you guys whispering.
PHOE: Ok, so, ok, was he holding you? Or was his hand like on your back?
Joshua: Huh. Oh, boy! (Sits down next to her.) Uhh, I-I dont wear suits to work, and I bought six of them from you.
Monica: Hi, glad you could come.
David: Wow, you look unbelievable.
Chandler: Do you have any ideas?
Rachel: (scoffs at him) Yeah, thats gonna get you into Soap Opera Digest. Well I (leans into the microphone again) I would just like to say that Joey truly has enriched the days of our lives.
David: Do you wanna get a drink?
Chandler: You sure you don't wanna stick around a little longer?
Phoebe: What are you talking about?!
Joey: (incredulous) Why should I help you?!
Chandler: Uhm, thank you, but we're really trying not to get our hopes up.
Rachel: (To Phoebe) In case you didnt notice, that is a scary man.
Chandler: Really? Are you sure?
Chandler: How do you feel about that?
Ross: Oh, well, uh, this is gonna sound kinda silly, but, do you remember my roommate Chandler Bing?
Joey: But my mom always makes them. It's like a tradition. You get a little piece of turkey on your fork, a little cranberry sauce, and a tot! It's bad enough I can't be with my family because of my disease.
Chandler: Making chocolate milk. Do you want some?
Chandler: So you know this leaves us with...
Ross: (to him) Hey! You wanna live to see your baby?!
Zack: No you did.
Zack: No you didn't.
Zack: Oh, thank you.
Ross: (to Emma) Can you say Barbados?
Chandler: Here you go. (Hands her the money.) Now stop bringing us pizzas you.
Chandler: You know, I flew a long way t see my loving wife? Is she here by the way?
Ross: What, now youre not even taking to me? (moves over to the coffee table) Look Rachel, I-Im sorry, okay, Im sorry, I was out of my mind. I thought Id lost you, I didnt know what to do. Come on! Come on, how insane must I have been to do something like this? Huh? I-I dont cheat right, I, thats not me, Im not Joey!
Monica: No, you said the baby creeps you out.
MONICA: Hey. Where is he, where's Richard? Did you ditch him?
Sarah: Thank you so much!
Vince: You made him a candle light dinner in the park?
Joey: Hey don't worry about that! I mean, Ross needs you! And Rachel and I will stay and help anyway we can.
Janice: Oh! Sid is still in his room. I don't allow porn at home so this is like a vacation for him. So did you do it? Did you make your deposit?
Monica: How dirty do you think I am? Im telling you, if you had some candles and some bubbles and some music, you would love it! It would take all of your stress away.
Monica: At least you took me down with you!
RACHEL: Well, you have been in our lives for nearly two months now and we don't really know you. I mean, who is Julie? I mean, what do you like, what don't you like? We wanna hear everything.
Rachel: If you like looking at butts so much why don't you just go look at a mirror?
Chandler: (to Rachel) And you Ross, I believe, if you check Rachels bag you will find a half-eaten box of cookies in there.
Joey: Yeah! How you doin'? Yeah alright!
Monica: It's nice to meet you. Janine...?
Ross: Uh, Joe, have you looked outside?
Monica: Im sorry. Im sorry. I-I should probably leave you girls alone. (She heads for the bedroom.)
Phoebe: Wait, (grabs him) you know what, I got a little story. When I was in Junior High School I went through this period where I thought I was a witch. And there was this guidance counselor who said something to me, that I think will help you a lot. He said okay, 'you're not a witch you're just an average student.' See what I'm saying?
Monica: Hi! Hey, Pete youre back! Hey, check this out. (She starts to skate over to him)
Monica: Come on! Come on, if we have sex again itll double our chances of getting pregnant. Do you think that closets still available?
PHOEBE: Oh, this is so nice. Alright I have to make a speech. I just wanna say that of all the guys that Monica has been with, and that is a lot, I like you the best.
Chandler: All right, theres a nuclear holocaust, Im the last man on Earth. Would you go out with me?
MONICA: If you really want to watch that Serengetti thing, you can.
Joey: Oh no-no, no-no I love living with you. It just seems that if youre gonna have a roommate, yknow it might as well be the father.
Phoebe: I know. Its just yknow usually when youre, when youre done with the pregnant thing, yknow, then you get to do the mom thing. Im gonna be yknow, sitting around in my leather pants, drinking Tequila.
Rachel: Yeah, I-I heard. (Pause, everyone looks at each other, waiting for Rachels reaction.) I think its great! (Hugs Ross.) Ohh, Im so happy for you!
Ross: I told you about my daughter.
Phoebe: Oh well, as long as it is under control, you know, you can't do anything about it, he's already dating her, and she is a nice person, that wouldn't be right.
Mrs. Waltham: Well, if youre on e of Rosss best friends, why arent you here?
Ross: Wait a minute, are you doing that thing where you pretend it didnt go well but it really did go well?
Ross: I'll help you. Yeah, I'll make up a schedule and make sure you stick to it. And plus, it'll give me something to do.
Joey: (To Ross) Ill tell you about it later. Be cool.
Joey: When that guy was robbing us, and I was locked in the entertainment unit for like six hours, you know what I was doing in there all that time? I was thinking about how I let you down!
Monica: Hey, how are you feelin? Any morning sickness?
Ross: Why, why would you open it?
Ross: Well, what do you do?
RACH: Joey, would you slow down? They're not gonna be sold out of papers at one o'clock in the morning.
Ross: I was working late in the library one afternoon. It was just the two of us. She needed some help with her word jumble. And one thing led to another. If you must know, Anita was very gentle and tender. May she rest in peace
Rachel: Yeah, Im not so sure you should be here when he comes up.
Ross: Oh yeah? Have you ever dated anyone who has been divorced three times?
JOEY: I don't know how to tell you this but, uh . . . I think Monica's cheatin' on ya.� I told you shouldn't have married someone so much hotter than you.
Monica: Oh, and the people are so nice. There's this one guy, Geoffrey, he's the Maitre D., Chandler, you will love him. He is without a doubt, the funniest guy I have ever met. (Chandler, who was almost asleep again, sits up straight in bed in an instant and can't believe what he just heard.)
Benjamin: Like I tried to tell you in the interview Ross, this grant is not based on your knowledge of pretty useless trivia.
Rachel: Ross, that girl just spent the entire evening talking to your friends, asking to hear stories about you, looking through Monicas photo albums, I mean you dont do that if youre just in it for two weeks.