words in movies
[Scene: A beauty parlour, Rachel is getting a manicure while Chandler, yes Chandler, is getting a petticure (Does that scare you that I know those terms? Well, it scares me.).]
Chandler: Y'know, I can't believe I'm getting my nails done! And you said it was gonna be fun! (pause) Which it kinda is. Also, you said there would be other guys here. There are no other guys here!
Rachel: Chandler, dont worry! This doesnt make you any less of a guy! (Chandler starts blowing on his fingernails like women do.) That does! (Chandler stops blowing.) What am I sitting on? (She looks and finds a huge nail.) I hate to think what this woman was scratching when this broke off.
Chandler: Hey, you know who used to have nails like that?
Woman: OH MY GAWD!! (Yep, you guessed it. Its Janice.)
Monica: Joey let me ask you a question. What does this light switch do?
Monica: Didnt it drive you crazy to have a switch and not know what it did?
Monica: They wouldnt have put it there if it didnt do something! How can you not care?
Rachel: Well, heres another question for ya. Uhh, do you know what that silver knob on the toilet does?
Rachel: Okay, good. Now that since you know, when you come over would you mind actually using it?
Monica: How have you been?
Janice: I just came up to say, "Hi!" Hi! (to Chandler) And you, sweetie, Ill see you tonight.
Phoebe: What?! I thought you were crazy about her!
Joey: So what are you doing bringing her here?! Theres people here!
Rachel: You are not. You have never been able to break up with her.
Emily: I cant believe you really walk alone here! I mean, you hear such stories about New York.
Emily: So how are you? Ive been meaning to ring you ever since I arrived but umm, well, Ive been rather busy.
Devon: Do you realise that we have not seen each other since the night of that U2 concert?
Emily: Oh my God. I think youre right.
Liam: (puts his arm around her) Well, actually the last time you and I saw each other was that morning.
Ross: Oh, Liam. So uh, what, were you guys playing soccer or somethingor should I call it (In an English accent) football?
Liam: In fact were playing a game at the park tomorrow. Youre welcome to play too if you want.
Emily: Well I mean, youre American to start with. You dont even have rugby here.
Devon: So good then! Well see you at Riverside Park at 2:00! Cheers!
Chandler: Yes, I-I know that you do, but I think one of the reasons people were complaining though, was that they paid to hear the actor sing Old Man River.
Janice: Oh, too soon, too schmoon. Face it honey, I am not letting you get away this time.
Chandler: Okay, could you just stop talking for a second? (Thinks) Yemen. Thats right, yes, Im being transferred to Yemen!
Joey: (to Rachel) I bet I stopped listening before you did.
Joey: Dude, youre not even man enough to order the channel that carries the sport.
Chandler: Yknow uh, you didnt really have to help me pack.
Janice: Ohh, well when you said all you were going to be doing between now and the time you leave is packing, you didnt really leave me much choice. Did you?
Joey: Nope. (To Ross) Man look at this! Ross, I cant believe you said youd play rugby. I mean look how brutal this is!
Ross: Thats cause-cause youre moms dog kept-kept looking at me.
Joey: Ross! (Laughs) Theyre gonna kill you!
Phoebe: Well, why are you doing this anyway?
Ross: Well, you shouldve seen the guy that she used to go out with. I mean, hes like Joe Rugby.
Phoebe: Youre kidding! And he plays rugby?! Thats so funny. (Realises) Ohh! I see how you did that. All right.
Rachel: (starts laughing, Ross stares at her) Im sorry. Im sorry. Youre right, you are a tough guy. Youre the toughest palaeontologist I know.
Joey: Well, maybe thats because youre closer to you. So you look bigger to you from where you are.
Joey: I totally dont know what youre talking about.
Ross: Youll see.
Liam: You dont say! (We see Ross who is hopping about with the ball and spikes it in his face.)
Rachel: You are not going to believe it! Joshua came into work today, and guess what happened?
Monica: He asked you out?!
Chandler: Yknow you, really didnt have to take me to the airport.
Janice: Oh please. Every moment is precious. Yknow? Besides, somebody had to ride in that other taxi with the rest of your luggage, and your friends dont really seem to care too much that youre leaving.
Janice: On no! No! Its not good-bye, Im not leaving until you get on that plane.
Chandler: What would you give to a kid if he wanted a ticket to play with?
Ticket Counter Attendant: Are you travelling with a child?
Chandler: No. All right, yknow what, shes (Points to Janice) gonna think that Im handing you a credit card, but what Im really gonna do is hand you a library card.
Janice: Whats the matter? Is something wrong? Do you have to stay?
Phoebe: No offence but, yknow sometimes its hard to understand you, yknow with the accent, so
Ross: Did you see me? I was pretty good, huh? That is one fun game!
Ross: (to Emily) Hey, could you do me a favour? Could you just grab me a bottle of water?
Emily: Ross, they are killing you out there!
Phoebe: Shes right! You have to stop!
Joey: Dude, if you go back out there, youre gonna be Dead Ross!
Emily: All right, all right, if you insist on doing this, at least let me help you.
Emily: No. Thats not what Im saying. I just may know a few things that might help you inflict some pain.
Emily: And uh, Liam, Liams got bad knees. You hit him right and hell go down like a lamp.
Emily: I dont care! You just get him!
Monica: Oh, just some pictures I made and hung up. I thought theyd brighten up the place. They do dont you think?
Rachel: And did you?!
Phoebe: Now, are you sure you dont want to go see a doctor?
Ross: No, not you. (Emily gets it.)
Emily: You were amazing out there.
Emily: You really enjoyed yourself didnt you?
Ross: Please! Are you kidding? I-I hurt three huge men, I gave a guy a bloody noseI mean I-Im not proud of it but, I really am. And its all because of you, wonderful, amazing you.
Emily: I think youve got concussion.
Ross: No, no, Im serious. Thank you.
Emily: Youre welcome. (She hugs him tightly and he winces.) Im sorry. Did I hurt you?
Ross: Its worth the pain. (She goes to hug him again.) Yknow what, you know what? Its not.
Janice: Oh, my Bing-a-ling. Ill wait for you. Do you even know how long youre going to be gone?
Janice: Oh. Well, Ill right you everyday. (Reading the address) 15 Yemen Road, Yemen.
Chandler: Janice! There you are! There you are! I had to have one last kiss, and also-also you said that you were going to leave right after I got on the plane!
Janice: No! No! I wanna see you take-off.
Chandler: Well, I then guess Im going to Yemen! Im going to Yemen! (To this old woman also going to Yemen.) When we get to Yemen, can I stay with you?
Ross: You ate my sandwich?
Chandler: You know, I don't mind a... male nanny, but I do draw the line at a male wetnurse. (again they laugh, even more fake than before)
Rachel: Yeah, Why? You don't think a woman can do this?
Monica: (startled) Ahh! Arent you dressed yet?
Joey: (entering from bathrooms excitedly) You guys! You guys! Youre not gonna believe what my agent just told me!
Chandler: You mean you didnt get it from this?
Monica: Ditch you? Phoebe, you were pregnant with the triplets!
Chandler: Well maybe you should put some ice on it.
Phoebe: Okay. Oh umm, Chandler, Monica is looking for you.
Estelle: Well, I think uhh, someone out there may have been bad mouthing you all over town.
Chandler: Okay, heres the situation. The keys to the cuffs are on the back of the door. Could you be a doll and grab them and scoot on over and unlock me? And on a totally different subject, that is a lovely pantsuit.
Rachel: What were you thinking?!
Rachel: I cant talk to you. I cant even look at you right now!
Ross: Fine, yknow what, thats it. From now on, Joey, I want you to be my best man.
Chandler: Yes, it does bother me! And I think it would bother a lot of people. Rachel, when you were going out with Ross, did it bother you when he flirted with other women?
Ross: All right, did you just say all right?
MNCA: Well, we just happen to go to alot of places where you might drink. I mean, how do you go to a wine tasting without having a drink? Or... or to a club, or to the... zoo.
Rachel: I see your fifty cents... and I raise you... five dollars. (throws it in)
Joey: Oh, hey, hey, can I give you guys your house-warming present now?
Monica: You just put an empty carton back in the fridge!
Chandler: Do you think hell ever forgive me?
Chandler: Okay, look, I'm gonna pull on the door and you guys push as hard as you can. Maybe we can get enough room to wiggle him out, okay? Okay, so PUSH!
Kara: Nice to meet you Monica. Bing! (Slaps Chandler on his butt.)
Ross: When did I say you were boring?!
Joey: Hands! It is absolutely essential that you tell me what room the man my assistant described is staying in. Hes a patient of mine, Ive been treating him for years!
Joey: Hey! Let me ask you guys something. I have a new headshot taken tomorrow right and the photographer said she thinks Ishould have my eyebrows waxed. Is that weird for a guy?
Monica: You sold me out.
Phoebe: Look Eric, turn around. (He does so.) Look, I like you, but it shouldnt be this hard. Yknow? This is our first date yknow? First dates are supposed to be about excitement and electricity and Ooh, he just touched my hand, did he mean to touch my hand? and yknow first kisses and (He kisses her) second kisses. (Motions for him to kiss her again which he does and they start to make out.)
MONICA: Chandler look, I don't want to be one of those wives who says, "You can't go to the game.� You have to spend time with me."� So, if you could just realize it on your own . . .
Joey: No dude, you gotta hold your breath until youre ready to answer the question.
Rachel: Why arent you home yet?!
Dr. Leedbetter: (laughs) Oh, you know what?
Monica: But we were hoping that since we told you the truth that you still might consider...
Alice: None the less. Umm, youre too young to, to really know what you want. (They embrace in a passionate kiss.)
Chandler: Please tell me you got the message!
JOEY: "Heckles, you crack me up in science class. You're the funniest kid in school.
Leslie: I ran into Vlad at the place where they sell the big fish, and he said you played here a lot, so umm....
Benjamin: I never should have broken up with you. I think about you all the time. I mean, do you ever still think about me?
Joey: I dont know why you just dont say left.
Joey: Hey. Y'know with that goatee you kinda look like Satan.
Rachel: I'm trying to put Emma down for a nap, have you seen Hugsy?
Joey: (Hes recorded his voice on the tape) Joeys your best friEnd. You want to make him a cheese sandwich everyday. (he laughs) And you also want to buy him hundreds of dollars worth of pants.
Monica: When Mom and Dad drove you to the hospital to get your nose fixed, I swam into the lake and fished it out.
Joey: Oh wow! Okay man, Im sorry. I did not mean to make you feel bad.
RACHEL: Yeah, who's gonna eat all our food, and tie up our phone lines, and - is that my bra? What the hell you doin' with my bra?
Joey: You hug me!
Amanda: (to Phoebe) No I distinctly remember you were dodging her (points at Monica) calls and trying to avoid seeing her.
Chandler: Oh, is this about you-you dating the nurse? Yeah, Joey already told me, and I am so-so fine. I mean, you and I we're just, y'know, we're nothing, we're goofin' around.
Rachel: Ohh, not compared to you. (Chandler nods in agreement)
Ross: Watch. (he takes the laptop) Here, you ehm... You highlight the word you want to change. Go under Tools and the Thesaurus generates... 'gives'... 'gives' a whole list of choices. You can pick the word that sounds smartest.
Ross: Listen, I know you wanted to talk to me, but I have an idea that may make you want to stay married. (Rachel shakes her head.) We register, and you get to keep all the presents!
Ross: Yeah I-I dont-I dont think Im quite there yet, but I could say I looove spending time with you.
Ross: Uh yeah! Let me, let me get that for you.
Chandler: Why havent you told them?!
Joey: Who would you rather sleep with Monica or Rachel?
Monica: Don't stare. Now she just finished throwing his clothes off the balcony, now there's just a lot of gesturing and arm-waving, (shows Rachel gesturing with hands in front of her chest), Ok, that is either, "How could you?" or, "Enormous breasts!" Here he comes!
Rachel: Honey, its so sweet that you want me to stay, but I-I cant do that to you. I mean it would disrupt your entire life.
Rachel: But honey he calls everybody by a nickname! Okay, look, I know, all right, just one dinner, please, just one night for me, please. I just want him to love you like I do. (Ross looks at her) All right, well not exactly like I do, but, but, if you do come to dinner, Ill love you like I do in that black thing that you like.
FBOB: If... if you want to drink, it's OK with me, I've got to get used to it.
Carol: Look, you don't have to talk to it. You can sing to it if you want.
Rachel: Are you kidding?!
Monica: Well, no. Youre Chandler. Y'know, Chandler! (hits him on the arm)
Chandler: Why cant you tell her?
Monica: (grabs a bag of those Styrofoam peanuts) Ill be coordinator! Oh my God! Im so sorry, I didnt get you anything! Okay, look everybody has to help! Okay? You can help, cant you Phoebe?
Chandler: Make sure you put all that stuff back in the closet, okay?
Rachel: Oh no. You went on our honeymoon alone?
Mike: Phoebe you don't have to eat...
Monica: You said the baby.
Phoebe: Yeah. So, we can do it tomorrow night, you guys. It's Valentine's Day. It's perfect.
Joey: I can still hear you!
Joey: What youdont hold it like that! Youre lettin all the good stuff fall out.
Rachel: Hmm. Look, Ross, if you want your neighbors to like you, why don't you just pay the hundred bucks? The party's gonna cost you way more than that.
Interviewer: So it looks like youve got some great experience here. Lets see ahh, reason for leaving last job?
The Salesman: Yeah. Could you just sign right here please? (Hands him a clipboard.)
Phoebe: I think its important that you do.
Chandler: Hey, will you grab me a cruller? (Joey starts to groan and get up.) Sit down! Will you go to the hospital?!
MONICA: God, you are so lucky. I mean, I mean. . . you know what I mean.
Rachel: (on tape) Oh, thank God youre here! You have to help me! Were you just talking to yourself?
Rachel: I was just getting him to like you.
Rachel: Ross, its okay. You can come out.
Chandler: Look, I can�t do this. I can�t make luv to you while we�re fighting this way.
Chandler: Oh! (Puts his hand on her belly.) Shes growing inside you.
Rachel: WhYou dated my sister!
Monica: I gave you one job! (Starts to examin the lasagne through the bottom of the glass pan.)
Joey: That's not the point Chandler. The point is that you lied.
Phoebe: You mean like a doctor?
Phoebe: I see what youre doing!
Phoebe: Good! Good! I was just testing you.
Ross: You chipped in?!
JOEY: No no, seriously, Chandler and I were just talkin about this. He is so much cooler than our dads. [Chandler starts kicking him below the table] I mean, you know, our dad's are ok, ya know, but Richard is just- ow, ow. What are you kickin me for? Huh? I'm tryin to talk here.
Phoebe: Let's see! (Opens her address book.) Oh, you know who's great? Sandy Poophack.
Rachel: Well, I-I should've told you the truth.
Ross: Sweetie, you gotta relax. Everythings gonna be great, okay? Come on. Come on.
Phoebe: Yeah... Ogh... Okay, fine. You made your point. Can you please just be Mike Hannigan again?
Ross: Youre back.
Monica: Guys, you got your hair cut.
Rachel: (stands up as well) What?! Me?! What about you and your consummated like bunnies nonsense!
Paul: You have a son?
Rachel: Oh, thank you... (looks at his face trying to remember his name)
Phoebe: I know what time you said.