words in movies
Ross: Hey! I just got uh, my teacher evaluations! Check out what this one student wrote, "I loved Dr. Gellers class. Mind blowing lectures! Dr. Geller, you are definitely the hottie of the paleontology department!"
Joey: Oh hey, do you still have their final exams?
Joey: Oh, cause you can just match the evaluation to the exam with the same handwriting and boom, theres your admirer. (Ross is stunned.)
Joey: Oh, well think of it like this, when youre 90
Joey: No thats not what I was going to say at all. No, what I was going to say is when youre 90 youll still have the memory of what it was like to be with a 20-year-old.
Joey: Hey Chandler! Yknow that girl you went to college with who-who became a movie director?
Joey: Oh well listen, anyway shes directing the new Al Pacino movie. You gotta get me an audition!
Joey: No-no-no, please-please Chandler I-I-I would owe you so much!
Chandler: You do owe me so much. You owe me three thousand, four hundred
Joey: Hey-hey dude, why are you changing the subject? Why? Will you make the call or what?
Joey: All right! Thanks! Youre the best! Now listen, the last day of auditions is Thursday. Okay? So I gotta get in there by Thursday. Okay? Just remember Thursday. Thursday. Can you remember Thursday?
Joey: (angrily) Thursday! Look if you need help remembering think of like this, the third day. All right? Monday, one day. Tuesday, two day. Wednesday, when? Huh? What day? Thursday! The third day! Okay?!
Chandler: (sarcastically) Thank you.
Chandler: You just thought of that in there?
Monica: Youre on the phone!
Rachel: (on phone) Oh my God! Oh my God! Thank you! (Hangs up) That was the fire department, there was a fire at our place!
Chandler: What are you smiling about? What is so funny?
Burt: (another professor) Wow! It looks like you were very generous with your grades this semester! (Ross frantically starts to change some as a female student, Elizabeth, approaches.)
Ross: Oh thank you. Thanks very much. (Leans up against the board and on a thumbtack.) Ow! (He pulls away.)
Elizabeth: Uh, Im a little embarrassed about calling you a hottie on my evaluation
Ross: That was you?
Elizabeth: Yeah. I felt a little weird about it. Youre a teacher. Im a student. But would you maybe want to go out with me sometime?
Elizabeth: Oh, because I was thinking, the semesters over; youre not my teacher anymore.
Elizabeth: (checks her grade) Oh, yknow what? Forget it, you already gave me an A.
Joey: (to the fireman) Hey buddy, do you think I can borrow your uniform this Thursday?
Monica: Joey! Hes working! (To Chandler) You would look good in that.
Fireman #1: So uh, youre not gonna be able to live here for a while, you ladies have a place to stay?
Rachel: (stands up) Wow! Oh-okay, look pal, I am not in the mood to be hit on right now! But if you give me your number I will call you some other time.
Chandler: Have you figured out what started the fire Mr. Fireman?
Fireman #1: Well uh, do either of you smoke?
Fireman #1: No-no-no, do you uh light candles? Burn incense?
Chandler: (on phone) Oh thats great! Good for you.
Chandler: Okay! So yeah, maybe we can get together umm (Joey mimes throwing something in the air, catching it, rolling it out, putting it in an oven and cutting it.) Can you hold for one second please? (To Joey) What?!
Joey: When youre off the phone, do you wanna get a pizza?
Monica: Wow! So, now youre going on a date with this girl?
Chandler: Honey, it is not a date! I havent talked to her in ten years! You cant just call up somebody you havent talked to in ten years and ask them for a favor. There are rules, yknow? You gotta, you got to put in some time.
Monica: Youre right, Im sorry. Its not like youre yknow, going out with an ex-girlfriend.
Monica: You dated her!
Joey: Hey, you wanna do Joey a favor, maybe you go out with Joey. (He turns around to see Chandler glaring at him.)
Dana: Apparently Howies editing now. Yeah, he-he-he calls me up and asks me if he can edit my new movie. Can you believe that?! Yknow I-I-I havent spoken to him in like ten years and he asks me for a favor!
Dana: No, no "How you doing?" Man, I mean not even a cup of coffee first!
Monica: I know! Now look, theres only one problem though. Theres only room for one, so I guess one of you will have to stay at Joeys.
Phoebe: Well, since the fire was kinda my fault I guess (To Rachel) you should get to stay here.
Phoebe: Well no, it was my fault so you should get the nice room.
Monica: So Rach! Youre the first guest at Hotel Monica! Umm, youll just have to tell me how you like your eggs in the morning. And I thought I would bring them to you, yknow, in bed. Oh, you have been through so much.
Elizabeth: Oh please! It was such a big class! You never even noticed me!
Ross: What? Of course I did! You uh, you sat next to Sleepy Sleeperson.
Ross: Oh uh, I had trouble remembering everyones name, so I-I kinda came up with nicknames. Like the guy on the other side of you was Smelly von Brownshirt.
Elizabeth: Oh yeah. So umm, did you have a nickname for me?
Elizabeth: Yes you did! What was it?
Ross: Listen, I gotta tell ya, I-Im having a great time! Yknow how before you said it might be weird, the whole student teacher thing, and to be frank I thought it would be too, but its not. I mean its not at all.
Phoebe: So did you sleep well last night?
Monica: Now there you go! I wouldnt want my best guest to strain her eyes!
Monica: Does that smell bother you?
Monica: Well you let me know if you can, because yknow I can bake a pie to cover it.
Monica: Hello? (Listens) Oh yes, one minute please. (To Phoebe) Its for you. Its the fire inspector.
Joey: (in a funny voice) Yeah, so it turns out that it wasnt the hair straightener that started the fire. (Rachel prompts him on what to say next.) No-no, it was the candles. Its very not good leaving candles unattended. In fact, one of the first things they teach you in fire school is (Phoebe suddenly enters.) Uhh Uhh Okay. Well, I have to go now. (Phoebe leaves.)
Monica: Well Ross, you be careful now. You dont want to get a reputation as yknow Professor McNailshisstudents.
Joey: Well Ross, it seems pretty clear. I mean whats more important? What people think or how you feel, huh? Ross, you gotta follow your heart.
Joey: You couldnt do it?!
Monica: What?! Youre going out with her again!
Monica: Joey! You didnt even know her!
Chandler: Great story again! The yarns that you weave! Woo-hoo-hoo!
Dana: Wow. Oh, I am really flattered, but I just I dont feel that way about you.
Dana: Im sorry Chandler, yknow you are such a sweet guy and I, I dont want to hurt you. Oh, I wish there was something I can do to make you feel better.
Chandler: Well maybe there is one thing you can do.
Dana: Absolutely! But you-you would really feel better about me rejecting you if your actor friend can audition for my movie?
Chandler: Well, the heart wants what it wants. Ill see you later. (He runs off and leaves her with the bill, which the waiter promptly delivers.)
Monica: But you should eat them now because theyre hot from the oven.
Monica: (opening the door) What are you doing?
Joey: Rach! Hey! Its fine! Youre at Joeys!
Ross: What do you want to do now? Huh? You wanna go get a drink?
Ross: Oh, you have some studying to do?
Elizabeth: What are you doing?
Ross: Nothing, Im-Im just, Im so comfortable with you!
Elizabeth: Do you not want to be seen with me?
Ross: What?! No! No! Wait! Youre right, this is stupid. Who cares what people think? I mean, I mean we like each other right? Theres nothing wrong with that. Come on. (They get up and go over to the table where his colleagues are sitting.) Burt? Lydia? Mel? This is Elizabeth.
Lydia: Arent you in my Popular Culture class?
Ross: Thats right Lydia, Elizabeth here is a student and uh, were dating. And you may frown upon that, but were not gonna hide it anymore.
Mel: You are so fired.
Burt: Theyre gonna fire you! You cant date a student! Its against the rules.
Joey: Hey, here you go. (Hands her another one.)
Chandler: (To Joey) So, you busy Thursday?
Joey: Oh, very funny. I dont know if you remember, but my audition was supposed to be Thursday. (Chandler doesnt say anything until Joey figures it out.) You got me the audition?! Lets hug it up! (They hug.)
Chandler: Okay. Okay. (Joey puts him down.) What are you gonna do to me if you get the part?
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Listen umm, yeah okay, I need to talk to you!
Phoebe: Now I know that they said that the umm, the hair straightener started the fire but I think Im partly at fault. You see, I didnt, I didnt tell you but umm, but I-I had recently refilled the tissues and so yknow lets just face it, thats just kindling! So I think its better that I stay at Joeys.
Phoebe: Okay. Oh umm, Chandler, Monica is looking for you.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Okay, you have to switch with me! Monica is driving me crazy!
Phoebe: No but at Monicas you can eat cookies over the sink!
Ross: Wow! It actually is in the handbook. I cant date you or have a hot plate in my office. I cant believe we have to stop seeing each other.
Elizabeth: For what its worth I did appreciate you standing up for me. It felt really nice. It kinda made me like you even more.
Ross: I know, I know I really like you too. But we-we cant date. Its against the rules. Its forbidden.
Elizabeth: Just hearing you describe it as forbidden, its really hot.
Mike: But if you wanna get married why didn't you say something before?
(Chandler takes Monica's hand, and gets serious) Look, before we sign anything we really have to talk...(pause) We're not who you think we are.
Chandler: Ok, so now that you're in, what are you gonna do if we win?
Phoebe: How can you let him talk to your crotch like that?
Phoebe: Oh can I? Vegetarians never get to do the wishbone. It's really not fair either! You know, just because we don't eat the meat doesn't mean we don't like to play with the carcasses!
Joshua: (turning around) Oh! You know what I need?
Joey: (looks at her for a moment) What the hell are you talking about??
Monica: Joey!! What the hell were you doing?!
Monica: All right, well call you when we get back.
Chandler: Okay. Thats better. Now I want you to both apologize to each other and mean it.
Chandler: Whoa-ho, whoa! No, I was thinking about y'know for me, as a part of that whole getting over Janice thing you were talking about.
Phoebe: Yeah, okay, Ive-Ive been dating both of you, and its been really horrible. Cause y'know its been a lot of fun, for me. Umm, but I-I like you both, and I, and I didnt know how to chose, so... Im sorry, Im just, Im terrible, Im a terrible person. Im terrible.
Ross: I just wanted to tell you something before you heard it from someone else and I hope this isn't too weird, but uh, I had uh, a thing with Janice. (He laughs, his real laugh this time.) What you're-you're not mad?
Phoebe: Yes, yes I do. God, oh its just perfect! Wow! I bet it has a great story behind it too. Did they tell you anything? Like yknow where it was from or
Chandler: I'm sure it's somebody for you. Now, go hide. (Ross hides in the bedroom again)
Monica: Well, after 15 years of mom and dad keeping it as a shrine to you, its time the velvet ropes came down.
Ross: Thanks you guys. (Walks away happily and his parents smile.)
Phoebe: Oh my God, you guys are selling the entertainment center?
Chandler: Well I'm not showing you my 'tat.'
Dr. Harad: Okay. You ready to push again?
Ross: You're just jealous because you couldn't pull this off. Yeah, now if you'll excuse me (getting up and taking his coat) I have a date. (As he is walking out, everyone turns and stares at him) See? (To Joey) ALL eyes on ME!
Tim: Thank you so much! Cause I-I know I can do better!
Phoebe: (to Robert) Youve have lipstick right here (points to her cheek). Thats okay, its mine, we just kissed.
Woman: (To Ross and Rachel) Congratulations you two!
Joey: Okay. Now youre gonna want to have sex with me when you hear it, but you have to remember it is just the story.
Monica: (still talking to the woman) All right, Ill do it just this once! But you cant tell anybody!
Rachel: Yeah! I'm going to Paris. Thank you, Ross!
Monica: Isn't that sad? I mean, can you see how pathetic that is? You shouldn't be jealous. You should feel bad for him.
ROSS: You got me a cola drink?
Phoebe: I'm sorry, Frank. I didn't realise things were so bad. You know, I'll help out more. I can - I can babysit any time you want. You name the day, and I'll be there.
Joey: If you want, Ill sell my friends and use the money to buy you presents.
JOEY: Hey, look, since we're neighbors and all, what do you say we uh, get together for a drink?
Receptionist: The doctor will be right with you sir.
ROSS: No no, no, that, that's your Christmas tip, alright. Oh, hey, do you think there's a chance you could fix that radiator now?
Joey: Calm down, do you want this unit or not?
Chandler: I thought maybe you got me porn for Valentines Day.
RACHEL: But I do not want to have everything decided for me. I spent my whole life like that. It's what I had with Barry, that was one of the reasons I left. I, I like not knowing right now and I'm sorry if that scares you but if you want to be with me you are gonna have to deal with that.
Joey: (standing behind her) Uh, you gotta press the button. (Does so.)
Rachel: Do you have any ice?
Chandler: No, I invited him to dinner so you could get a chance to get to know him! I mean, if we go through a sperm bank you never meet the guy, get to check him out.
Joey: You were right before. I mean, friends are so important.
Rachel: (coming down the stairs) Hey! (Ross jumps up, and quickly puts the letter back together, pretending like he has just finished it.) What happened to you? Why didnt you come up?
Monica: (To Rachel) Apparently you were umm, a little mean to him in high school.
Steve: Yeah, he's the handy man. He's gonna be retiring next week and everyone who lives here is kicking in a 100 bucks as a thank you for all the hard work type of thing.
VAN DAMME: You don't think I'm cute?
Rachel: Ross! I think she is trying to make something happen with you to get back at me!
Joey: Oh hey, you should be excited about him. Theres nothing wrong with him hes a good guy.
Joshua: All right, thank you so much for all your help.
Rachel/actress: It's over! You have to accept that.
Joey: Whoa-whoa you guys, it's not a cat!
Ross: (on the phone) Ive been thinking, this is crazy, I mean dont, dont you think we can work on this?
Phoebe: If you wouldve let me finish, it goes on to say that hes probably not gay.
ROSS: What? You have a date? Who with?
Joey: Youre not stupid. Youre meaner than I thought.
Rachel: Since when do you watch the news?
Phoebe: So have you decided on a band for the wedding? Because, yknow, Im kinda musical.
Monica: Are you serious? (they all look) Oh my God.
Rachel: Well, you more then me, but he cant stay to mad at me. I mean, I just had his baby.
Melissa: Hmm Phoebe, were you ever in a sorority?
Rachel: Do you want me to quit?
Joey: Maybe you could take Charlie shopping.
PHOEBE: No. What do you, what do you want me to be, like some stupid, big, like, purple dinosaur?
Joey: You were supposed to duck!!! Why didnt you duck?
Charlie: And you know, you can just give me my stuff whenever you want.
Chandler: So, how would you like to have a baby that's half yours and half his!
Judge: Now it also says here that you lied about your sexual preference before marriage?
Mindy: (to Rachel) You did it twice?
Rachel: I mean, do you think there are people who go through life never having that kind of...
Chandler: Why are you so sure I didn't watch this tape?
MONICA: Hey, you got me, put it in.
Rachel: Yeah, you got like 14 hours until she has to be at the airport, and youre sitting here in the hallway with a 28-year-old cheerleader with a fat lip.
Monica: Okay. Umm, y'know, I dont think, I dont think I told you this, but umm, I just got out of a really serious relationship.
Dina: I I dont care about fashion! Im pregnant! And I know you are too, so you gotta help me!
Chandler: Youre turning into a woman.
Amy: (thinks about it) You’re right, you’re right! I’m gonna do it!
Phoebe: Yeah! It really has been great too, you know, some of this people must have seen me play before because they were requesting a bunch of my songs! Yeah, "You suck" and "shut up and go home".
Ross: Look, I-I know its not a proposal and I dont know where you are, but with everything thats been going on and with Emma and Ive been feeling
Janice: Im telling you Rachel, listen to Janice. They all say theyre gonna be there until they start their real family.
Janine: Hey! Youre a good dancer!
Ross: Why aren't you guys dressed?
David: Wow, you look even... more beautiful than you did yesterday.
Rachel: Did you tell the doctor you did it jumping up and down on your bed?
Lizzie: Would you like my tin-foil hat?
Monica: Who do you wanna fool around with?
Chandler: Wh-How did you lose at Cups?!
Chandler: No! Youre the sweetest! (He tries to kiss her but Monica backs away with a look that could kill on her face.)
Ross: Hey! Hey! Hey! I get to choose my best man, and I want both you guys.
Monica: (Takes it) That's Mindy? Wow, she is pretty. (Sees Rachel's look) Lucky. To have had a friend like you.
Joey: I was going for quiet desperation. But if you have to ask...
Rachel: No honey, we're sorry, we didn't mean it. I love you. I love you.
Rachel: (Looking through her purse.) Okay, you know what? I dont have it, but I can tell you exactly where it is on my night stand, and...okay. But you know what? I have my drivers license and I have a twenty. (She slides it across the counter.)
Monica: Look! You knew this about me when you married me! You agreed to take me in sickness and in health. Well, this is my sickness!
Chandler: So, ahh, how are ya? How ya...How ya... You okay?
Joey: Come on man, just-just let the girls stay, Ill do whatever you want.
Monica: I was just saying that because I was ovulating and you said you wouldn�t have sex with me while we�re fighting.
Robert: Ah, good to meet you. Robert.
Phoebe Sr: What are you doing here?!
Phoebe: Youre kidding! And he plays rugby?! Thats so funny. (Realises) Ohh! I see how you did that. All right.
Rachel: Well, it gets worse. When asked if you take initiative I wrote, "Yes, he was able to unhook my bra with minimal supervision," and under Problems with Performance I wrote, "Dear God, I hope not," and then uh, then I drew a little smiley face, and then a small pornographic sketch.
Phoebe: Thats the same month as Halloween. So, um, what kinda things do you like to do at home?