words in movies
Ross: Take from me, as the groom all you have to do is show up and try to say the right name.
Ross: Phoebe, oh my God! Wh-wh-what are you doing here?
Phoebe: I need to talk to you, its pretty urgent. Its about Monica and Chandler.
Ross: Oh my God! Of course, of course. (To the class.) Umm, would you please excuse me for a moment? Umm, do you know each others hometowns? Why dont you (Motions that they should learn everyones hometown.) (To Phoebe) Wh-whats going on?
Phoebe: Well, umm, not much. But, I was just thinking that since those guys just got engaged that maybe it would be nice if they had some privacy, yknow? So, could I just move in with you for a couple days?
Ross: Phoebe, you said it was urgent!
Ross: Do you realize I have a classroom full of students?
Chandler: Well, you couldnt get them anyway. Ian doesnt plan anymore and Derrick (Off of Rachel and Monicas looks) And Derrick is a name I shouldnt know.
Joey: (sitting up from the couch) Hey Mon, do you have another pillow? (Holds up one.) Yknow, something a little snugglyer?
Chandler: Why are you napping over here instead of over at your place?
Monica: Of course you can look at it! Yeah, I want your opinion too!
Monica: Here you go! What do you think about centerpieces?
Joey: (sitting up again) Guys! Guys!! You gotta let me nap! Ugh, Im gonna get cranky!
Joey: Hey little buddy, how are you feeling? (The duck does not get sick and Joey recoils in horror and heads for the couch.) What the hell is in that face cream? (Hes about to try out the couch but notices the bed in Rachels room. He walks into her room and feels the bed.) Thats so soft. (He pulls back the comforter.) Pillowcases! (He climbs in and groans in delight. Suddenly, he feels something under him and pulls out a little beat up paperback book. He opens it and starts to read from it.) (In his head.) Zelda looked at the chimney sweep. Her father, the vicar (Stops reading and thinks.) The vicar? (Continues reading) wouldnt be home for hours. Her loins were burning. She threw caution to the wind and reached out and grabbed his (Out loud.) Whoa! (Reads on in silence.) Whoa-ho-ho-ho! This is a dirty book! (Continues to read.)
Ross: Phoebe, what are you doing?
Ross: Phoebe, you cant massage people in my apartment!
Joey: Sweepin. Why? Turn you on?
Rachel: Joey, did you my face cream?
Joey: Where are you going? The vicar wont be home for hours.
Rachel: Joey, (nervously) where did you learn that word?
Joey: Where do you think, (pause) Zelda?
Rachel: (gasps) You found my book?!
Rachel: Joey, what-what are you doing going into my bedroom?!
Joey: Okay, look Im sorry, I went in there to take a nap and I know I shouldnt have, but you got porn!
Rachel: Hey-hey, yknow what? I dont care! Im not ashamed of my book. Theres nothing with a woman enjoying a little erotica. Its just a healthy expression of female sexuality, which by the way, you will never understand. (She goes into her room.)
Joey: You got porn!
Ross: Can I, can I help you with something?
Woman: Well, I dont know. Are you a masseur?
Woman: Great! (Calls down the hall) Dad! (Her old father walks in.) Thank you so much, Ill be back to pick him up in an hour. (She walks away.)
Mrs. Geller: So Chandler, youre parents mustve been thrilled when you told them you were engaged.
Monica: Oh dad, really you dont need to
Mrs. Geller: (incredulous) You dont know how that happened?! Your dog thought my diaphragm was a chew toy!
Monica: Well, at least youre not hearing it for the first time at your fifth grade Halloween party.
Mrs. Geller: You tell her Jack, I cant do it.
Monica: What happened? You still have the Monica wedding fund dont you?
Monica: I dont believe you spent my wedding fund on the beach house!
Mrs. Geller: Were sorry honey, but we just assumed if you got married after you turned 30 youd pay for it yourself.
Monica: You bought the beach house when I was 23!
Mr. Geller: Which means you had seven years of beach fun and you cant put a price on that sweetie.
Mr. Geller: We started saving again when you were dating Richard and then that went to hell, so we redid the kitchen.
Ross: Okay! Now, Im going to touch you. (He does so, very gingerly.) Ohh, thats soft. (He starts poking him and notices his salad spoons and starts to massage him with those.)
Monica: I cant believe this. Do you think that your parents could help pay for it?
Phoebe: (gasps) My God! What did you order?!
Rachel: Wait, but theres no money! Well this is terrible! You guys are gonna have to get married in like a, rec. center!
Rachel: No, yknow what? Its gonna be okay. I mean you dont have to have this rustic Italian feast. Yknow? And-and you dont need, you dont need this custom-made, empire waisted, duchess, satin gown; you can wear off the rack. (She starts to cry, as does Monica.)
Rachel: Do you even understand what off the rack means?!
Phoebe: Look, why dont you just pay for it yourself?
Monica: Whoa!!! Are you kidding me?!
Monica: (To Chandler) How great are you, you little saver?! I mean, the-the amount you have is exactly the budget of my dream wedding!
Rachel: (starting to cry) Ohh, you guys are so made for each other.
Chandler: Well, youre not suggesting that we spend all of the money on the wedding?
Monica: Honey, umm I-I love you, (laughs) but umm, if you call our wedding a party one more time, you may not get invited. Okay? (Laughs) Listen, we could always earn more money, okay? But uh, were only gonna get married once.
Joey: Hey Rach, do you smell smoke?
Joey: No-no-no, Im serious. You dont smell it? Somethings on fire.
Ross: (sitting down) Hey, what are you guys, what are you guys talking about?
Ross: (takes a drink) Damn, this coffees cold! Hey Rach, do you mind if I heat this up on your loins? (Joey and he both laugh.)
Rachel: Yknow, I can not believe you told him, Joey!
Ross: So I guess you bought that book after we broke up huh?
Rachel: Uh-huh, yeah I did, because I wore out my first copy when I was with you. (Exits.)
Phoebe: (entering) Ross! How could you do that to an old man?!
Phoebe: He said you poked at him with wooden spoons.
Phoebe: Well, hes never coming back! Okay? You just cost me eight dollars a week!
Ross: Hey, yknow what? This is your fault! Youre the one that didnt move his-his appointment.
Phoebe: Oh, its my fault?! You didnt have to massage him! You couldve sent him away! You couldve not rolled Tonka trucks up and down his back!
Ross: He said he liked that!! Oh youre right, youre right. Im sorry.
Joey: Dude, what are you massaging an old man for?
Monica: Listen umm, Ive been thinking, its not fair for me to ask you to spend all of your money on our wedding. I mean, you work, you work really hard for that.
Monica: Eh, you work for that.
Monica: You do?!
Chandler: Yeah, Im putting my foot down. Yeah look, when I proposed I told you that I would do anything to make you happy, and if having the perfect wedding makes you happy then, then thats what were gonna do.
Monica: Oh, youre so sweet. (They hug and kiss.) Oh, but wait, what about our, what about the future and stuff?
Monica: You thought about that?
Monica: What else did you think about?
Chandler: Sure you do.
Monica: No, I want everything you just said. I want a marriage.
Chandler: You sure?
Chandler: I love you so much.
Monica: I love you. (They kiss.) Hey listen umm, when, when you were talkin about our future you said cat, but you meant dog right.
Rachel: Who are you supposed to be?
Rachel: Do you even know what a vicar is?
Rachel: (sarcastically) Yeah. Look Joey, its enough all right?! You keep making these stupid jokes and this sleazy innuendoes and itsIm notits just not funny anymore!
Joey: All right, Im sorry. Rach IRach Im sorry. Okay? Im sorry! Maybe I can make up for it by, taking you roughly in the barn. (Giggles.)
Rachel: All right! Yknow what? Thats it! You wanna do it?! Lets do it!
Rachel: (starting to move closer to him) Thats right, I wanna do it with you! Ive been trying to fight it, but you just said all the right things.
Joey: Hey-hey, youre startin to sound like the butchers wife there in-in chapter seven.
Rachel: Oh, come on now, dont keep me waiting. Get those clothes off! But, I would keep that helmet on because youre in for a rough ride! (He backs into the door.)
Chandler: I just want you to know that what you witnessed in there, that wasnt for fun.
Ross: (To Chandler) You dont think its a little crazy that you get all my points just cause you
Rachel: Its not dumb. But, maybe its okay that youre not a part of it. Y'know what I mean? (Ross looks confused) I mean its like, I-I-I like that youre not involved in that part of my life.
Joey: Yeah, shes been out there for twenty minutes, Im surprised you didnt hear her on the way over.
Monica: You came?!
Ross: Just showing you my run-of-the-mill-slice-it-right-off third nipple.
Phoebe: Because I was ashamed ok? I sold out for the cash! And then they give me benefits like medical, and dental, and a 401K. But you know... you pay a price. Now I'm this Corporate stooge and punching a clock and Ugh! paying taxes!
Gary: Hey, honey! Okay, so did you find any apartments? Anything in Brooklyn Heights?
Chandler: Uh, Joey is gonna be right back. Right back! (Tries to pantomime it for her.) Meanwhile, let's-let's-let's talk about you. (Pause.) So, you're old and small.
Phoebe: (calling from her room) Are you under the sheet?
Emily: You were amazing out there.
Rachel: Yes, his name is Barry, hes a doctor, thank you very much.
Gate attendant #1: Madame, if you don't have your boarding pass...
Monica: Have you ever been to one of my weddings?
Phoebe: Where are you going?
Chandler: You dont turn and slide, you throw it out! Im tired of having to get a tetanus shot every time I get dressed!
Joey: I said a little bit Ross. Now, how about you Chandler?
Phoebe: Écoutez, je vais vous dire la vérité. C'est mon petit frère. Il est un peu retardé. (Translation: Listen, I will tell you the truth. He's my little bother. He's a bit retarded.)
Rachel: You bought boobs?
Woman: I can still see you!
Phoebe: Okay, what about after I give you these candies? (Hands them each one from her purse.)
Joey: Yeah. I'll see you in the morning.
CHAN: No, I don't even think he knew. Hey, would you sleep with somebody to get a great job?
Ross: So, you’re saying, uh, if I wear these pants I might be getting into hers?
Monica: What? You freak! You wouldnt even have known about this place if it wasnt for me!
Ross: Okay. Have a great time you guys.
Chandler: You know, you should really go on this show. All right, listen, I got three tickets to the Rangers tonight. What'd ya' say?
Monica: Rachel! Rachel! You havent touched Eldads hair!
Rachel: That is so sad. Your missing out on so much, Ross. I mean, the bonding and the sharing, you know. And-and knowing that someone else is going through the same thing you are.
Rachel: You know we were all alone and he was being really nice to me and, oh and he gave me this scarf...
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Shhh! Im on a call! (On phone) Umm well yeah, you can pick it up tonight, say 8:30? At-at my apartment. Its umm, its umm 5 Morton Street, Apartment 14, umm and then maybe yknow after we can grab a bite to eat or whatever. (Listens) Okay, well okay Ill see you then. (Listens) Bye. (Hangs up.)
Joey: No, I-I figured you would've picked a blond guy.
Joey: Hey, I got one keyhole and about a zillion keys. You do the math.
Ross: And she just gave you this?
Phoebe: (smiling) This is terrible, what are you going to do?
Phoebe: You wanna do it right now?
Chandler: When did I try to give you money?
Joey: Look I dont know this baby. I dont know if shes a famous artist or not. You know, and I dont want to be a jerk but youre changing too much around here.
Janice: Hello, Joey, our little matchmaker. I could just kiss you all over, and I'm gonna!
RACHEL: [enters from her room] OK, ready when you are.
Rachel: Wow, you guys, this is big.
Phoebe: And do you know what girls are really good at?
Monica: You still have feelings for me dont you?
Tag: (entering) Yeah? (She holds up the folder) You found them!! (Rachel is not amused, because shes still going to try to blame him for her mistake like every good boss.) Yknow what? Im not even going to gloat. Im just really relived this whole thing is over.
Rachel: Joey! It is an auction! You dont guess, you buy!
Chandler: So, what do you think?
Phoebe: I dont know, it would totally depend on her coloring and (realizes) You got the job!!
Chandler: Hey, you guys!
Paul: Im thinking that you are looking really fine it that dress.
Ross: Are you sure?
Chandler: You know, I always feel that way after an interview. I'll bet it went better than you think.
Phoebe: You mean the chocolate chip cookie recipe?
Monica: Sweetie, I think the glasses look great. They make you look really sexy.
Joey: So, youd hire me, right?
Rachel: (looking around) Who are you talking too? Oh, youre kidding! Oh, its a joke! (Laughs.) Its funny. Its funny. I dont get it. (Joey doesnt say any thing and Rachel realizes its not a joke.) Oh. (Pause) Okay. Umm I-I uh, wow. Are you uh How did umm When?
Joey: You could?
ROSS: You, you know I, I don't, have a- have a problem with that.
Ross: Well, so, you-youll get a job here! I mean, Im always hearing about uh, them foreigners coming in here and stealing American jobs; that could be you!
Rachel: Ok, I know this is gonna sound really stupid, but I feel that if I can do this, you know, if I can actually do my own laundry, there isn't anything I can't do.
Phoebe: And yknow, even if they break up again, youd better not let him in your sad mens club!
Chandler: Well, before we answer that, I think we should address the more important question. How dumb are you?
Phoebe: Hey, do you think this is why Chandler took off?
Ross: Well, you may wanna steer clear of the word 'dumped'. Chances are he's gonna be this, this broken shell of a man, y'know, so you should try not to look too terrific, I know it'll be hard. Or, y'know, uh, hey!, I'll go down there, and I'll give Barry back his ring, and you can go with Carol and Susan to the OB/GYN...
Phoebe: (laughs) Thank you.
Phoebe: Who are you kidding? (To Joey) You just find some guy off the street for me? Oh God! This is humiliating!
Rachel: Please! During that second time you couldn't have picked her out of a lineup!
Phoebe: You do?
Phoebe: You know, you are talking about one of my dear, dear friends.
Ross: Who would you rather be Simon or Garfunkle?
Joey: (in a sexy voice) How you doin'?
Rachel: Right. So, what you have to do is, you have to accidentally run into her on purpose. And then act aloof.
Ross: Okay, well be right in. (to Chandler) So ah, did your boss try to slap you again today?
Ross: You were trying to eat it!
Parker: Oh well, at least you were lucky to have him. Bow-wow old friend, bow-wow. So wheres the party?
Mindy: Now, I know things've been weird lately, but you're like my oldest friend in the world... Except for maybe Laurie Schaffer, who I don't talk to anywhere, 'cause she's all bitter now that she lost the weight and it turns out she doesn't have a pretty face. ....Okay, I'm just gonna ask you this once, and I want a straight answer.
Monica: All right then, go fight for her! Go to London! I mean, that could be you and Emily! (Points to the TV.) That, but-but nicer. Just, go to London!
Ross: Thank you!
Ross: Probably. But you know, I'll tell you something. Passion is way overrated.
Chandler: Say your son never feels connected to you, as one. Say all of his relationships are affected by this.
Joey: No-no-no I've seen it happen, you-you get a rapport going with a woman but somehow you manage to kill it. What's your secret?
Cop: (following her) Hey by the way, I'm sure Sipowicz is gonna be all right. I heard that kid from Silver Spoons is really good. (Phoebe's stunned) And where did you find my badge?
Joey: And youll be nice?
Monica: Hey, Rach, you're leaving tomorrow, shouldn't you be packing?
JOEY: You don't keep it over here on this table any more?
Phoebe: Did you find the dress?
Chandler: Yknow uh, you didnt really have to help me pack.
Joey: Maybe you changed?
Monica: (To Chandler) Did you hear that?! They bumped them up to first class because they are on their honeymoon! Come on! Lets act like were on our honeymoon.
Chandler: Don't ask me, I was in there canoodling you!
Woman: Excuse me, I-I couldnt help overhearing, youre marrying Chandler Bing?
Rachel: All right, all right, well you just blew your chances at dating Bob!
Rachel: Oh not bad. Do you know that feeling when youre trying to blow a Saint Bernard out your ass?
Monica: Yeah, but if it's good news, you should tell him now.
Joey: Hey, yeah! Then we could do that telephone thing! Y'know, you have a can, we have a can and it's connected by a string!
Rachel: What do you mean you quit?! You cant quit!
Ross: Oh, hey y'know, they-they really overcharge you for that stuff. (Rachel glares at him.) But who cares?! Because it's all on me! (Rachel reaches into the fridge and pulls out two handfuls of those mini booze bottles.) (Watching her.) That is, one big drink!
Mrs. Bing: Car's waiting downstairs, I just wanted to drop off these copies of my book for your friends. Anything you want from Lisbon?
Ross: Okay Phoebe, I guess youre next (To Joey) although I really dont see the point.
Phoebe: Oh, okay. (Walks over to him.) Excuse me sir? Could you come with me please? You have a phone call.
Phoebe: Thats what you think.