words in movies
Ross: Take from me, as the groom all you have to do is show up and try to say the right name.
Ross: Phoebe, oh my God! Wh-wh-what are you doing here?
Phoebe: I need to talk to you, its pretty urgent. Its about Monica and Chandler.
Ross: Oh my God! Of course, of course. (To the class.) Umm, would you please excuse me for a moment? Umm, do you know each others hometowns? Why dont you (Motions that they should learn everyones hometown.) (To Phoebe) Wh-whats going on?
Phoebe: Well, umm, not much. But, I was just thinking that since those guys just got engaged that maybe it would be nice if they had some privacy, yknow? So, could I just move in with you for a couple days?
Ross: Phoebe, you said it was urgent!
Ross: Do you realize I have a classroom full of students?
Chandler: Well, you couldnt get them anyway. Ian doesnt plan anymore and Derrick (Off of Rachel and Monicas looks) And Derrick is a name I shouldnt know.
Joey: (sitting up from the couch) Hey Mon, do you have another pillow? (Holds up one.) Yknow, something a little snugglyer?
Chandler: Why are you napping over here instead of over at your place?
Monica: Of course you can look at it! Yeah, I want your opinion too!
Monica: Here you go! What do you think about centerpieces?
Joey: (sitting up again) Guys! Guys!! You gotta let me nap! Ugh, Im gonna get cranky!
Joey: Hey little buddy, how are you feeling? (The duck does not get sick and Joey recoils in horror and heads for the couch.) What the hell is in that face cream? (Hes about to try out the couch but notices the bed in Rachels room. He walks into her room and feels the bed.) Thats so soft. (He pulls back the comforter.) Pillowcases! (He climbs in and groans in delight. Suddenly, he feels something under him and pulls out a little beat up paperback book. He opens it and starts to read from it.) (In his head.) Zelda looked at the chimney sweep. Her father, the vicar (Stops reading and thinks.) The vicar? (Continues reading) wouldnt be home for hours. Her loins were burning. She threw caution to the wind and reached out and grabbed his (Out loud.) Whoa! (Reads on in silence.) Whoa-ho-ho-ho! This is a dirty book! (Continues to read.)
Ross: Phoebe, what are you doing?
Ross: Phoebe, you cant massage people in my apartment!
Joey: Sweepin. Why? Turn you on?
Rachel: Joey, did you my face cream?
Joey: Where are you going? The vicar wont be home for hours.
Rachel: Joey, (nervously) where did you learn that word?
Joey: Where do you think, (pause) Zelda?
Rachel: (gasps) You found my book?!
Rachel: Joey, what-what are you doing going into my bedroom?!
Joey: Okay, look Im sorry, I went in there to take a nap and I know I shouldnt have, but you got porn!
Rachel: Hey-hey, yknow what? I dont care! Im not ashamed of my book. Theres nothing with a woman enjoying a little erotica. Its just a healthy expression of female sexuality, which by the way, you will never understand. (She goes into her room.)
Joey: You got porn!
Ross: Can I, can I help you with something?
Woman: Well, I dont know. Are you a masseur?
Woman: Great! (Calls down the hall) Dad! (Her old father walks in.) Thank you so much, Ill be back to pick him up in an hour. (She walks away.)
Mrs. Geller: So Chandler, youre parents mustve been thrilled when you told them you were engaged.
Monica: Oh dad, really you dont need to
Mrs. Geller: (incredulous) You dont know how that happened?! Your dog thought my diaphragm was a chew toy!
Monica: Well, at least youre not hearing it for the first time at your fifth grade Halloween party.
Mrs. Geller: You tell her Jack, I cant do it.
Monica: What happened? You still have the Monica wedding fund dont you?
Monica: I dont believe you spent my wedding fund on the beach house!
Mrs. Geller: Were sorry honey, but we just assumed if you got married after you turned 30 youd pay for it yourself.
Monica: You bought the beach house when I was 23!
Mr. Geller: Which means you had seven years of beach fun and you cant put a price on that sweetie.
Mr. Geller: We started saving again when you were dating Richard and then that went to hell, so we redid the kitchen.
Ross: Okay! Now, Im going to touch you. (He does so, very gingerly.) Ohh, thats soft. (He starts poking him and notices his salad spoons and starts to massage him with those.)
Monica: I cant believe this. Do you think that your parents could help pay for it?
Phoebe: (gasps) My God! What did you order?!
Rachel: Wait, but theres no money! Well this is terrible! You guys are gonna have to get married in like a, rec. center!
Rachel: No, yknow what? Its gonna be okay. I mean you dont have to have this rustic Italian feast. Yknow? And-and you dont need, you dont need this custom-made, empire waisted, duchess, satin gown; you can wear off the rack. (She starts to cry, as does Monica.)
Rachel: Do you even understand what off the rack means?!
Phoebe: Look, why dont you just pay for it yourself?
Monica: Whoa!!! Are you kidding me?!
Monica: (To Chandler) How great are you, you little saver?! I mean, the-the amount you have is exactly the budget of my dream wedding!
Rachel: (starting to cry) Ohh, you guys are so made for each other.
Chandler: Well, youre not suggesting that we spend all of the money on the wedding?
Monica: Honey, umm I-I love you, (laughs) but umm, if you call our wedding a party one more time, you may not get invited. Okay? (Laughs) Listen, we could always earn more money, okay? But uh, were only gonna get married once.
Joey: Hey Rach, do you smell smoke?
Joey: No-no-no, Im serious. You dont smell it? Somethings on fire.
Ross: (sitting down) Hey, what are you guys, what are you guys talking about?
Ross: (takes a drink) Damn, this coffees cold! Hey Rach, do you mind if I heat this up on your loins? (Joey and he both laugh.)
Rachel: Yknow, I can not believe you told him, Joey!
Ross: So I guess you bought that book after we broke up huh?
Rachel: Uh-huh, yeah I did, because I wore out my first copy when I was with you. (Exits.)
Phoebe: (entering) Ross! How could you do that to an old man?!
Phoebe: He said you poked at him with wooden spoons.
Phoebe: Well, hes never coming back! Okay? You just cost me eight dollars a week!
Ross: Hey, yknow what? This is your fault! Youre the one that didnt move his-his appointment.
Phoebe: Oh, its my fault?! You didnt have to massage him! You couldve sent him away! You couldve not rolled Tonka trucks up and down his back!
Ross: He said he liked that!! Oh youre right, youre right. Im sorry.
Joey: Dude, what are you massaging an old man for?
Monica: Listen umm, Ive been thinking, its not fair for me to ask you to spend all of your money on our wedding. I mean, you work, you work really hard for that.
Monica: Eh, you work for that.
Monica: You do?!
Chandler: Yeah, Im putting my foot down. Yeah look, when I proposed I told you that I would do anything to make you happy, and if having the perfect wedding makes you happy then, then thats what were gonna do.
Monica: Oh, youre so sweet. (They hug and kiss.) Oh, but wait, what about our, what about the future and stuff?
Monica: You thought about that?
Monica: What else did you think about?
Chandler: Sure you do.
Monica: No, I want everything you just said. I want a marriage.
Chandler: You sure?
Chandler: I love you so much.
Monica: I love you. (They kiss.) Hey listen umm, when, when you were talkin about our future you said cat, but you meant dog right.
Rachel: Who are you supposed to be?
Rachel: Do you even know what a vicar is?
Rachel: (sarcastically) Yeah. Look Joey, its enough all right?! You keep making these stupid jokes and this sleazy innuendoes and itsIm notits just not funny anymore!
Joey: All right, Im sorry. Rach IRach Im sorry. Okay? Im sorry! Maybe I can make up for it by, taking you roughly in the barn. (Giggles.)
Rachel: All right! Yknow what? Thats it! You wanna do it?! Lets do it!
Rachel: (starting to move closer to him) Thats right, I wanna do it with you! Ive been trying to fight it, but you just said all the right things.
Joey: Hey-hey, youre startin to sound like the butchers wife there in-in chapter seven.
Rachel: Oh, come on now, dont keep me waiting. Get those clothes off! But, I would keep that helmet on because youre in for a rough ride! (He backs into the door.)
Rachel: Would you excuse me, please? I'm trying to have a date here.
Ross: Okay, now hold on. Joey, why, why can't you just wear the underwear you're wearing now?
Rachel: Well honey, what about you?
Ross: Can't do it, can you?
Chandler: (To Ross) Why don't you cut him a little slack? Okay? Maybe if he relaxes a little bit, he'll get some work done.
MONICA: Ok. [Richard walks in] Hey, why don't you ask Richard?
Rachel: You know what?
Monica: Well, that's different. My lie didn't make one of us a felon in 48 states. What were you thinking?
Chandler: You went home with the waitress.
Rachel: God. You seem really, really nice.
Phoebe: I think she took it pretty well. You know Paolo's over there right now, so...
Ross: What?! What? How do you, how do you even know its broken?!
Phoebe: Wow, kids. Frank, are you sure youre ready for that?
Phoebe: Well how would you know?! You didn't even read it!
Chandler: Whoah whoah, back up there, Sparky. What'd you mean by that?
Phoebe: (picking up her bag) All right, so promise you're gonna wait for her to call you?
Kate: He happens to be brilliant. Which is more than I can say for that sweater youre dating.
Phoebe: You dont have to put a good spin on everything.
Phoebe: Hi, Bubbles. Manly. Well, I just thought I would drop by and let you know how it went with Joey.
Monica: Where do you want to start?
Phoebe: 'Cause, you know, (in that voice) if you don't look good, we don't look good. I love that voice.
Rachel: Whoa! (Laughs) Y'know what Katie? I gotta tell ya I-I-I-I think you are the one who is too much. (She punches Katie back.)
Chandler: Well, look its been a really emotional time yknow, and youve had a lot to drink. And youve just got to let that go okay? I mean you were the most beautiful in the room tonight!
Monica: Yeah! I mean it was really funny, I-I just don't think you got it. You see Kara's coffee is-is-is weak tasting, okay? But-but what Doug was-was imply that it was weak physically. You get it now honey?
Rachel: Oh, there you are! Hi! Oh, so, so, how was China, you? (Hits him with the flowers.)
Rachel: Honey wait, Joey, Im sorry I mean as terrific as I think you are with it (Looks for help.)
Ross: Thank you.
Ross: Hey Pheebs, could you please not put your feet up on my new (On Rachels glare) old sheet?
Rachel: Hi. Ohhh, you got my message.
Rachel: I just never had a relationship with that kind of passion, you know, where you have to have somebody right there, in the middle of a theme park.
Chandler: (after they've left) Okay, did you see that?! With the inappropriate and the pinching!!
Rachel: Barbara! Hi, how are you? (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) No, I understand. Yeah. Oh, oh, come on, no, I'm fine. Don't be silly. Yeah... oh, but you know, if-if anything else opens up, pleaHello? Hello? (hangs up phone, very depressed)
RUSS: I guess you guys heard, Rachel dumped me.
RICHARD: That's fine. Well, your other dad and I are gonna go have a romantic evening and I guess I'll just see you kids around.
Rachel: Yeah, just so weird seeing him like that, you know? I mean he is a doctor, you don't expect doctors to get sick!
PHOEBE: OK, Rachel, why don't you start talking first.
Chandler: You see, I dont say(Starts laughing.)
Chandler: We are supposed to make these decisions together! Did you not watch the Doctor Phil I taped for you?
Ross: (stopping her from falling) Okay, okay. Look, you have got to go to a doctor! Okay?
MONICA: Alright, I'll give you the ear thing but don't you think the ending was pretty wonderful?
Chandler: You got waaaay too much free time.
Monica: We have too! I mean what if Ross's hears that and then calls her back and then they get back together? Is that what you want? Ross back with that controlling, neurotic, crazy Emily? The Emily that wouldn't let him see you?
Phoebe: If shes no fun, why do you want to date her at all?
Rachel: Chandler, I gotta tell you, I love your mom's books! I love her books! I cannot get on a plane without one! I mean, this is so cool!
Monica: Oh, you can't show Phoebe this! She hates those corporate massage chains.
MONICA: Because, you were mean to me and you, you teased me and you always, always got your way.
Joey: How're you doing?
Phoebe: Well, do you see any babies?
RACHEL: Phoebe, how would you do this to me? This was all your idea.
Chandler: Uch, do you think, Monica is gonna be able smell it?
Rachel: No! Put that box down! We are not going anywhere! This is my apartment and I like it! This is a girls apartment! That is a boys apartment, its dirty and it smells. This is pretty. Its-its so pretty! And look, and its-its purple! And Im telling you, you with the steady hand, I am not moving, and now I have got the steady hand. (She holds out her hand, which is shaking uncontrollably.)
Joey: You gotta tell Ross how you feel.
Chandler: Argh! I can't believe what you did. Monica's gonna kill you!
Chandler: Hey thats okay. So, where do you want to go?
Chandler: (smiling at Monica) Right. (to Rachel) So how're you doing?
Mr. Geller: Whoa-whoa-whoa! I dont think so! Arent you ovulating?
RACHEL: No, no, no, no I don't think it's weird, I think, I think umm, in fact, in fact you know what I think?
Phoebe: How can you not know which one?
Phoebe: Oh my God! You got off easy! When my friend Silvie's husband said someone else's name in bed, she cursed him and turned his thingy green.
Ross: Well, of course you can defend yourself from an attack you know is coming, thats not enough. Look, I studying kara-tay for a long time, and theres a concept you should really be familiar with. Its what the Japanese call (he holds two fingers up to his temple, and he does this every time he says this word) unagi.
Ross: Monica, what is the matter with you?
Joey: All right, all right maybe-maybe you should just ask her to leave.
RACHEL: Well then uh, we better make this night count. [He starts to carry her out.] Oh wait, I forgot to turn off the cappucino machine. [He carries her over to turn it off.] Anchors away. Oh no no, my purse, my purse, my purse, my purse, my purse, my pu rse. [He carries her to the counter to pick up her purse.] Oh, you know what. I forgot to turn off the bathroom light.
Chandler: All right, look, look. What did... what did you get for Angela Delveccio for her birthday?
Monica: Ok, um, I'll go with you.
Chandler: And people say you dont pay attention. No, this is a much better job. Its vice-president of a company that does data reconfiguration and statistical factoring for other companies.
Mr. Thompson: So glad you brought someone.
Joey: YeahHey, dont worry, shes a terrific girl. And hey listen, could you do me a favor? When she comes out could you just mention that Im not looking for a serious relationship; thatd be great.
Phoebe: Hell yeah! Ill marry you! (She grabs the ring and puts it on.)
Ross: Pheebs you uh you do know how to ride a bike dont you?
Chandler: I know, I know, but youre gonna have plenty of chances. There are literally thousands of women out there just waiting to screw me over.
Phoebe: Okay, so now they know that you know and they don't know that Rachel knows?
Joey: Yeah, you dont want that.
Rachel: You went shopping for fur?
Phoebe: Would you say your pesto is the best-o?
Chandler: Y'know, I don't know if you've ever looked up the term goofing around in the dictionary... Well, I have, and the technical definition is, two friends who care a lot about each other and have amazing sex and just wanna spend more time together. But if you have this new fangled dictionary that gets you made at me, then we have to, y'know, get you my original dictionary. I am *so* bad at this.
Chandler: What did you just do?
Chandler: Well, its, its yummy. So Mary-Angela do you like it?
Mrs. Waltham: Oh yes, there you are.
Rachel: You were with Julie?
Sleep Clinic Worker: Um-hmm, and did you stay up all night in preparation for your sleep study. (Joey doesnt answer) Uh, sir? (Joey starts snoring)
Chandler: Ok, Monica, only dogs can hear you now, so, look, the door's open. Here we go.
Rachel: Well, Chandler, youre gonna have to tell him.
Chandler: Yeah, at least you hid your feelings well about it. (Removes a smashed racquet from his bag.)
Ross: Oh, you guys call him Cute Coffeehouse Guy, we call him Hums While He Pees.
Phoebe: What? You know about the plate thing?
Rachel: Phoebe, you were right. I should've never gone to London, and from now on you make all of my decisions for me.
Phoebe: Oh let me guess, and you wanna have them all at the same time and you wanna have them for your brother.
Rachel: Anastassakis/Papasifakis wedding, excellent! {Its a good thing Jennifer Aniston is Greek, because she had to pronounce those names. Luckily for me, they were written on a sign.}(The happy couple emerges.) Congratulations. (To the best man and maid of honor) Mazel Tov! (The rabbi emerges.) Hi! Oh, great hat. (Hes wearing an interesting hat and she takes him over to talk.) Listen umm, I need you to perform another wedding. Can you do that?
Monica: (goes to Chandler) Phoebe and Rachel saw you with Nancy today and... em... they think you're having an affair.
Ross: (entering) Well hey! Whats going on? Ooh, cool boat(Sees why the boats there)Oh, no. (Averts his eyes by looking around the room) (To Rachel) Hey, did you, did you tell them?
Rachel: Ross, you had sex with another woman!
MONICA: All right, look, Ross. I realize that you have issues with Carol and Susan, and I feel for you, I do. But if you don't help me cook, I'm gonna take a bunch of those little hot dogs, and I'm gonna create a new appetizer called "pigs in Ross". All right, ball the melon.
Monica: Uh, so, uh, Rach, uh... do you wanna save this wrapping paper, I mean, it's only a little bit torn... so are you gonna go for it with Ross or should I just throw it out?
Phoebe: No no no, Ill be nice, I swear!!! Could you just give me the number for where they are?
Phoebe: Well, if you think it will help.
Mrs. Geller: Do you know what it's like to grow up with someone who is critical of every single thing you say?
Monica: What are you guys doing? (Monica hears the moaning coming from the TV and looks at it) Oh my God, is that Richard? (It only takes a split second for Joey to realise, he pulls Monica down by her jacket, and she falls, face down next to Chandler. Chandler gets up a bit, and Joey quickly covers Chandler's eyes with his hand.)
Rachel: I love you too. (They hug.)
Phoebe: (checking her watch) You did it!