words in movies
CHANDLER: Ok, you can have it. [He licks it and offers it to her.]
MONICA: [She grabs the coffee cup on the table and licks the rim.] There you go, enjoy your coffee.
PHOEBE: [enters] Hey you guys, you will never guess who's coming to New York.
RACHEL: You went out with a guy in the Navy?
JOEY: Hey, is that when you wrote salt water taffy man?
MONICA: That'll teach you to lick my muffin.
ROSS: Yeah, so if you haven't already had it, chances are you're gonna get it.
MONICA: Honey, you made the bed again. I told you, you don't have to do that. This isn't camp.
RICHARD: What're you doing?
MONICA: Just waiting for you sweetie.
RICHARD: Are you remaking the bed?
MONICA: I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You know what, the way you did it was just fine.
MONICA: If I tell you, you'll think I'm crazy.
MONICA: Ok, you see, the tag shouldn't be at the top left corner, it should be at the bottom right corner.
MONICA: I'm just easing you in.
MONICA: Alright, you see these little flower blossoms? They should be facing up, not down, because, well, the head of the bed is where the sun would be. You don't love me any more do you.
RICHARD: Actually, if it's possible, I love you more.
MONICA: Really? Wow, well then come on, I wanna show you how to fold the toilet paper into a point.
CHANDLER: Hey, look Joey, I'm just saying if you need something to hold you over, I can get you a job right here as an entry level processor.
JOEY: But don't you need experience for a job like that?
CHANDLER: It's not that hard to learn. And as for people realizing you have no idea what you're doing, hey, you're an actor. Act like a processor, people will think you're a processor.
SCOTT: Where do you work?
JOEY: Uhh, well, right now I'm in between things. You know how it is. One day you're processing, the next day you're not so much... processing any more.
SCOTT: Fleischman's group. Whatever you do, don't touch his sandwiches. Ha-ha-ha...
JOEY: Ha-ha. [Scott leaves] Are all you processors dorks?
RACHEL: Oh, this lipstick looks just great on you.
MONICA: You look fabulous honey, you really do.
PHOEBE: Yeah? Are you sure, really. [She picks up a mirror and sees the white splotches all over her face.]
RACHEL: You see, you look beautiful. For god sakes, dim the lights.
MONICA: It's gonna be ok. Ryan's been under water. He's just gonna be so glad that you don't have barnicles on your butt.
PHOEBE: Well, no no, you have to stay back. I, I have the pox.
RYAN: Why aren't you at home in bed?
PHOEBE: 'Cause my, my grandmother's never had chicken pox. Please, please tell me you have, 'cause oh my God, I forgot how cute you are.
PHOEBE: Yeah, or you know, you could just wish that I didn't have them now.
PHOEBE: Nope. You don't want to see a face covered with pox.
PHOEBE: And you hate fish. Oh. That's so sweet, alright. Ok, alright, you can see. This is me... [she unveils herself right as a huge lightning bolt crashes outside. Ryan screams in terror.] Oh, I am scary.
RYAN: Sorry, the lightning. Lightning was an unfortunate incidence. You look lovely, lovely.
PHOEBE: I hate this. 'Cause I tell you, I had the most amazing two weeks planned for us, and almost everything I had in mind, we had to be a lot closer than this.
JOEY: Pretty good. It's like you said. It's mostly just putting numbers from one column into another column.
CHANDLER: Well there you go.
JOEY: Well, see when you're acting you need to think about stuff like that. My character, Joseph the processor guy, has two little girls, Ashley and Brittany. Ashley copies everything Brittany does.
CHANDLER: Really? Wow. That's some pretty powerful imaginary sperm you must have there.
RYAN: You know what makes the itching even worse?
PHOEBE: That you don't stop talking about it.
RYAN: What're you doing? Are you scratching?
RYAN: We can't scratch. You know we can't, we'll scar.
PHOEBE: Yeah, come on. You know you want it, you know you want it too, come on. Let's just be bad, it'll feel so good. [She starts scratching him.]
ROSS: You know, I might have expected this of you Phoebe, but Ryan, you're a military man.
JOEY: You and Milton have to join us on the boat. Karen'll pack a lunch, you'll bring the kids, we'll make a day of it.
CHANDLER: It's about cutting my people a little slack, ya know, for morale. Look, if you wanna see some rough numbers, I can get them to you by Wednesday.
CHANDLER: Uh, if you say so sir.
CHANDLER: Well, I'm going to kill you.
JOEY: Look, I'm sorry but that's what Joseph does, ok. If you try to pull somethin', he'll call you on it. 'What're you tryin' to pull,' he'll say.
RICHARD: You know, I like the way you have efficiently folded this tab under. See in a tape emergency you could shave valuable seconds off your time.
MONICA: Exactly. Oh, I love that I can be totally neurotic around you now. Tell me the truth. Don't you like it better now that everything on your desk is perpendicular?
RICHARD: Thank you.
MONICA: You know what. Tomorrow I'm gonna do your clocks.
MONICA: No no. See, in my bedroom I set my clock six minutes fast. You wanna know why?
MONICA: No forget it, I'm not gonna tell you now.
MONICA: No. See you don't understand.
MONICA: No. You don't have any of these cute little obsessive things.
MONICA: You would not. I can't believe this. I hate this, you're too normal. I can't believe my boyfriend doesn't have a thing. My boyfriend doesn't have a thing.
JOEY: Hey. Mr. Douglas is looking for you.
JOEY: 'Cause he has a strong suspicion that you dropped the ball on the Lender project.
JOEY: Becasue at first he thought it was Joseph. But after he asked Joseph about it, turns out it was you. Anyway, I just thought you should know.
CHANDLER: Alright, that's it. Look Joey, I'm sorry, I realize this is the role of a lifetime for ya, and if I could just fire Joseph, I would, but unfortunately that's not possible so I'm gonna have to let both of you go.
JOEY: What're you talking about, everybody loves Joseph.
JOEY: Oh yeah. Well you can't fire Joseph. You know why, 'cause he's not in your department.
CHANDLER: Yeah, Karen. I'm thinking about having an affair with her. Oh, you know what? I just did.
JOEY: Ahh. What the hell are you doing to me man.
JOEY: Take it easy. If it means that much to you, I'll uh, I'll go find something else.
CHANDLER: Thank you.
RACHEL: And there's a peach cobbler warming in the oven so the plate's gonna be hot but that shouldn't be a problem for you.
ROSS: Alright you kids, bye now.
PHOEBE: It's such a shame you can't see which finger I'm holding up.
RYAN: [Puts his hands over Phoebe's ears.] I must tell you, you look beautiful tonight.
RYAN: Sorry. You look beautiful.
PHOEBE: You know what, that's it, that's it. [She rips off the mits, Ryan follows her lead.]
MONICA: No honey. You have to sleep on this side of the bed because I have to sleep on this side of the bed.
RICHARD: Or so I would have you believe.
MONICA: No. Big deal, so you have a side of the bed, everybody has a side of the bed.
RICHARD: Hey come on, you haven't heard my reason yet.
RACHEL: So uh, Ryan, were you shipping off to?
ROSS: So do you have like any nuclear weapons on board?
RACHEL: Well do you get to look through one of those like, those periscope thingys.
PHOEBE: Ok, I'll walk you out.
RACHEL: It was nice to meet you.
RACHEL: So do you uh, think we can get you one of those uh, uniform things?
ROSS: You like that do ya?
RYAN: Can you believe how we spent our two weeks together?
PHOEBE: Bye you. [Ryan's cab drives off. As Phoebe is going back in, she sees the Central Perk sign in the window and laughs.]
ROSS: Is this what you had in mind?
RACHEL: Well then uh, we better make this night count. [He starts to carry her out.] Oh wait, I forgot to turn off the cappucino machine. [He carries her over to turn it off.] Anchors away. Oh no no, my purse, my purse, my purse, my purse, my purse, my pu rse. [He carries her to the counter to pick up her purse.] Oh, you know what. I forgot to turn off the bathroom light.
ROSS: Alright you know, why don't I just meet you upstairs. [Drops her on the couch and walks out holding his lower back.]
Ross: Great to see you!
Will: God we were lame back then. Do you remember how into dinosaurs we were?
Ross: You guys know where Rachel is?
Rachel: Oh well, hello. This is your lucky day Mr. Bowmont, the uh gentleman day sailer as just become available again and I believe that you made a bid of $18,000.
Monica: Listen Rachel, I feel really bad aboutWhat are you doing? (She sees that Rachel is unpacking.)
[Scene: The desert outside of Las Vegas, Joey is arriving and we hear the song, Name. Y'know, (singing) I've been through the desert on a horse with no name! It felt good to be out of the rain. In the desert, you can't remember your name, 'cause there ain't no one for to give you no pain. La la la-la-la, la, la, la, la-la-la. You get the idea. Anyhoo, he pulls up and stops. As he gets out of the car, he spills a huge pill of fast food containers out of the foot well.]
Joanna: You know, Junior Miss is where I started. Oh, I had to sleep with the ugliest guy to get that job.
Chandler: Have you figured out what started the fire Mr. Fireman?
Rachel: Ok. If you really need to.
RACHEL: Hey. Whe-ell, look at you, finally got that time machine workin' huh?
Chandler: Why would you say that?
Mona: No, its still wet. Yknow what? Let me get it out before it sets. Ooh, I have something you can wear. Here. (Hands him Rosss shirt.)
Ross: Rachel, I can see you dialing! I don't understand why...
Joey: (going over and picking up the rod) Thats all right. Hey you guys, you know whats going to be great about the fishing trip this year? When my dad gets me out in the middle of the lake and gives me that, "Joey, what are you doing with your life?" stuff. I can say, "Well, Im doing a movie with Charlton Heston dad. What are you doing with your life?"
Monica: Sweetie, with you its gonna be different. The sex is gonna be great, cause you-you guys are in love.
Rachel: Oh, great, Are you gonna be ok?
Ross: Did the TV wake you?
Joey: What are you doing?
PHOEBE: I told you not to do that yet. And, she wants to do a video.
Ross: Sorry. (Rachel sits on her bed). You ok?
Chandler: I Think last night was great. You know, the Karaoke thing. Tracy and I doing Ebony and Ivory.
Steve: (from kitchen) Ah, cool! Taco shells! (Rachel motions, "You see!") You know, these are... they're like a little corn envelope.
Rachel: Taking advantage? I'm giving you the advantage, enjoy!
Monica: What is with you?
Phoebe: Okay, my turn. My turn. (Joey hands her to Phoebe.) Oh! Youre so cute! Oh, I could squeeze your little head! (Pause) I wont.
Girl: Whatd you think I was, a hooker?
PHOEBE: Ok, ok, she's taking the trash out so I can get you out of here but it has to be now, she'll be back any minute.
Monica: Are you awake?
Joey: Hey, now youre the one who wet his pants. (He throws another handful on him and runs out)
Joey: I now pronounce you... husband and wife.
Rachel: Oh, you bought me a present! Why?
Joey: Okay, the ring fell on the floor and I went down to pick it up and you thought I was proposing.
Joey: Thank you.
CHANDLER: Alright look Ross I'll give you 50 dollars for your underpants.
Ross: You sure you're alright?
Phoebe: How could you possibly think that?
Phoebe: No, he really hates it. But he's gonna let me keep my box of human hair! So you got to pick your battles. But the good news is, Gladys is yours!
Ross: Hey, I was looking out for you.
It only takes two heart attacks to finally make you see One of them wont do it, but the second one will set you free Tell all your hate and anger, its time to say good-bye And that is just what I will do, soon as those bastards I work for die! La, la-la-la, la-la-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la
Rachel: (To Ross) So you were in an I Hate Rachel club?
Chandler: How do you know?
Monica: Okay, I umm, I ran into Richard yesterday and he asked me if I wanted to go for a bite and I did. The only reason I didn't tell you is because I knew you'd get mad and I didn't want to spoil our anniversary.
Rachel: You know it was you're uhm... birthday...
Nina: Oh my god! (Rushing over to give him a big hug) Youre amazing!
Ross: Joey, you shouldn't lie on your résumé.
Ross: Thank you. I'm glad you agree.
Rachel: Here you go Pheebs. Who else wants one of my special homemade brownies?
Ross: Im so glad youre going on this trip!
Monica: Wait a minute. Are you honestly telling me that-that you may never want to get married?
Ross: Well, it turns out that she is going to Daytona for spring break woo-hoo. That means, that means wet T-shirt contests, guys doing shots off of girls bodies, waking up next to people you dont even know
Rachel: (while entering) Hi you guys.
Monica: Ive been doing a lot of thinking. A lot! And umm, well, I came up with a whole bunch of businesses you can do with your van. Okay umm, you could be flower delivery person.
Mike: Oh, you haven't picked yet. Oh good, 'cause I had an idea. I thought it would be fun if the third groomsman was my family dog. Chappy.
Rachel: Eh, Im just so sorry I put you through it. And, I y'know, I dont want to get back together over a machine.
Chandler: YOU NEVER DID IT!
Joey: No, thank you.
Joey: I gotta a lot of nice stuff to say about you guys, ok? And I know how much you wanna have a baby, you know, and I would love to help you get one.
Joey: I could teach you a speech that I memorized for auditions.
Monica: See you guys later.
Sleep Clinic Worker: Alll right, well call you in a few minutes.
Kathy: No, you didn't. Hi, I'm Kathy.
Chandler: Well, I think you need to come out of your shell just a little.
Phoebe: (as Ursula) If it was, would you stop hanging out with her?
Joey: Damnit woman were losing precious time! Now do you want this mans blood on your head?
Joey: Maybe she meant to get you a hooker.
Mr Campbell: You don't?
Phoebe: Listen! You have to help me pick a dress 'cause I'm meeting Mike's parents tonight! (Rachel gasps)
JOEY: What're you doin' here? Aren't you supposed to be out with Rachel?
Michelle: Ross, you didn�t tell me you were a doctor!
Phoebe: Now you know how you really feel about it.
Chandler: (sitting down on the arm of her chair) You didnt think I used to wear glasses, right?
Phoebe: Oh, hi Chandler. It's Phoebe. Uhm... I know that Monica is working today so...(back to Central Perk) ...I was wondering if you want to come to the movies with me and Rachel.
Chandler: Honey, it is not a date! I havent talked to her in ten years! You cant just call up somebody you havent talked to in ten years and ask them for a favor. There are rules, yknow? You gotta, you got to put in some time.
Phoebe: Can you?
Gunther: Six? You want me to join you?
Monica: How about you go put on your 007 tuxedo and Ill make you a nice martini.
Richard: Noo! I came down here to tell you something else. I came here to tell you I still love you.
JOEY: Wow, you are a good friend, 'course the audition was this morning, and I didn't get it. But that was a hell of a kiss. Rachel is a very lucky girl.
Monica: Joey, we know that's you.
Rachel: You know I... (lifts her head and tries to look in Phoebe's direction)
Monica:: But you don't remember sleeping with her.
Mike: You really did that?
Mike: Ah! I missed you
David: (Stands up and speaks more loudly) Sorry, I wa- I was just saying to my friend that I thought you were the most beautiful woman that I'd ever seen in my- in my life. And then he said that- you said you thought
Girl: Who are you?
Mike: Yeah, but you can't do that.
Mackenzie: What are you? Eight?
Rachel: (to Ross) Could you please get her attention?
Joey: Will you let the lady talk?!
Joey: Correct! Now, would you like to pick a Wicked Wango card or spin the Wheel of Mayhem?
Ross: Uh, yeah, you sure you want to after what happened at their 20th?
Rachel: I know, I mean, why can't parents just stay parents? (She walks over near Chandler and his gaze stays very obviously on her chest) Why do they have to become people? Why do they have... (Notices Chandler) Why can't you stop staring at my breasts?
Man: You still don't know my name, do you?
Joey: What about her? They've only been going out for two weeks. Ross has been in love with you for like 10 years.
Monica: Phoebe, we are so proud of you! You're amazing!
Rachel: I'm fantastic. You remember Ross?
Joey: Yeah, well, that's fine, but the important thing is that I finished it. And uh, I think it's really good, but y'know it'd really help me is if I could hear it. So would you guys read it for me?
Assistant: You got two more twos?
Woman On Train: I made a bet with myself that you have beautiful eyes. Now that I see them, I win.
Joey: Okay. Yeah. Listen would you uh, would you like to have dinner with me tonight?