words in movies
CHANDLER: I'm tellin' you, she leaned back, I could see her brain.
MONICA: How many perfectly fine women are you gonna reject over the most superficial insignificant things?
CHANDLER: You or me?
JOEY: You guys are messin' with me, right?
PHOEBE: You name one woman that you broke up with for a real reason.
RACHEL: You don't have birds.
MR. HECKLES: Thank you. I'm going to rejoin my dinner party.
CHANDLER: Ok, Janice. Janice. You gotta give me Janice. That wasn't about being picky.
ROSS: We'll give you Janice.
MR. TREEGER: I know. I was sweepin' yesterday. It coulda been me.ROSS: Sure, sweepin'. You never know.
MR. TREEGER: You never know.
PHOEBE: I'm sorry, but sometimes they need help. That's fine. Go ahead and scoff. You know, there're a lot of things that I don't believe in, but that doesn't mean they're not true.
ROSS: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What, you don't, uh, you don't believe in evolution?
ROSS: You don't believe in evolution?
PHOEBE: I don't know, it's just, you know...monkeys, Darwin, you know, it's a, it's a nice story, I just think it's a little too easy.
ROSS: Uh, excuse me. Evolution is not for you to buy, Phoebe. Evolution is scientific fact, like, like, like the air we breathe, like gravity.
ROSS: You uh, you don't believe in gravity?
PHOEBE: Well, it's not so much that you know, like I don't believe in it, you know, it's just...I don't know, lately I get the feeling that I'm not so much being pulled down as I am being pushed.
MR. TREEGER: There she is. And over there, that's the other one. This is Mr. Buddy Boyle, Mr. Heckles' attorney. He'd like to talk to you.
MONICA: What can we do for you?
MR. BOYLE: All right, there was none. Let's talk signing. You be noisy girl number one, you be noisy girl number two.
MONICA: I can't believe that this whole time we thought he hated us. I mean, isn't it amazing how much you can touch someone's life, without even knowing it?...Would you look at this dump? He hated us. This is his final revenge!
RACHEL: Have you ever seen so much crap?
ROSS: How can you not believe in evolution?
ROSS: Pheebs, I have studied evolution my entire adult life. Ok, I can tell you, we have collected fossils from all over the world that actually show the evolution of different species, ok? You can literally see them evolving through time.
PHOEBE: Really? You can actually see it?
ROSS: You bet. In the U.S., China, Africa, all over.
ROSS: Well, there you go.
MONICA: You don't have any stuff.
RACHEL: You still think of it as your apartment, don't you?
RACHEL: Yes you do. You think of it as your apartment, and I'm just somebody who rents a room.
RACHEL: Ok, while you "mmm" on it for awhile, I'm gonna go find a place for my new lamp.
ROSS: Ok, Pheebs. See how I'm making these little toys move? Opposable thumbs. Without evolution, how do you explain opposable thumbs?
PHOEBE: Look, can't we just say that you believe in something, and I don't.
PHOEBE: What is this obsessive need you have to make everyone agree with you? No, what's that all about? I think, I think maybe it's time you put Ross under the microscope.
JOEY: "Heckles, you crack me up in science class. You're the funniest kid in school.
CHANDLER: Wow, Heckles was voted class clown, and so was I. He was right. Would you listen to that?
JOEY: So, you were both dorks. Big deal.
CHANDLER: I just think it's weird, you know? Heckles and me, Heckles, and me, me and Heckles...Would you knock it off?
JOEY: Have you been here all night?
JOEY: All right, you know what we gotta do? We gotta get you outta here. Come on, I'll buy you breakfast, let's go.
CHANDLER: How do you know that? How?
JOEY: I don't know, I'm just tryin' to help you out.
CHANDLER: You'll see, you guys are all gonna go off and get married, and I'm gonna end up alone. Will you promise me something? When you're married, will you invite me over for holidays?
JOEY: You can come over and watch the Super Bowl. Every year, all right?
CHANDLER: You know what? I'm not gonna end up like this. I'll see you man.
PHOEBE: Janice? You called Janice?
CHANDLER: Yes, Janice. Why is that so difficult for you to comprehend?
ROSS: You remember Janice, right?
JANICE: Is it yours? Ha! You wish, Chandler Bing. You are looking at a married lady now.
CHANDLER: You couldn't have told me about this on the phone?
MONICA: Hey, Rache. You know what we haven't played in a while?
MONICA: Did you know I was allergic to shellfish?
ROSS: Ok, Phoebe, this is it. In this briefcase I carry actual scientific facts. A briefcase of facts, if you will. Some of these fossils are over 200 million years old.
PHOEBE: Ok, look, before you even start, I'm not denying evolution, ok, I'm just saying that it's one of the possibilities.
PHOEBE: Ok, Ross, could you just open your mind like this much, ok? Wasn't there a time when the brightest minds in the world believed that the world was flat? And, up until like what, 50 years ago, you all thought the atom was the smallest thing, until you split it open, and this like, whole mess of crap came out. Now, are you telling me that you are so unbelievably arrogant that you can't admit that there's a teeny tiny possibility that you could be wrong about this?
PHOEBE: I can't believe you caved.
PHOEBE: You just abandoned your whole belief system. I mean, before, I didn't agree with you, but at least I respected you. How, how, how are you going to go into work tomorrow? How, how are you going to face the other science guys? How, how are you going to face yourself? Oh! That was fun. So who's hungry?
PHOEBE: Ok, I didn't see it, because I was putting on my jacket, but I uh want to believe you.
RACHEL: Ok, you win.
CHANDLER: If I'm gonna be an old, lonely man, I'm gonna need a thing, you know, a hook, like that guy on the subway who eats his own face. So I figure I'll be Crazy Man with a Snake, y=know. Crazy Snake Man. And I'll get more snakes, call them my babies, kids will walk past my place, they will run. "Run away from Crazy Snake Man," they'll shout!
MONICA: You have got to get over this. You're not gonna end up alone.
RACHEL: Chandler, you have just described virtually every man that we have ever gone out with.
MONICA: You are not a freak. You're a guy.
RACHEL: She's right. She's right. You are no different than the rest of them.
MONICA: Wait a minute, wait a minute. Yes he is. You are totally different.
MONICA: No, honey, in a wonderful way. You know what you want now. Most guys don't even have a clue. You are ready to take risks, you are ready to be vulnerable, and intimate with someone.
PHOEBE: Chandler, you called Janice! That's how much you wanted to be with someone!
MONICA: You made it!
RACHEL: You are ready to make a commitment!
RACHEL: What you got there? Something else that's not yours that you can break?
MONICA: No. Um, I know you like this, and I want you to have it. I think it'll look good in our apartment.
RACHEL: Thank you.
CHANDLER: Hey. Well, you will all be pleased to know that I have a date tomorrow night. This woman, Alison, from work. She's great. She's pretty, she's smart. And uh, I've been holding off on asking her out in the past, because she has an unusually large head. But, I'm not gonna let that stuff hang me up anymore. Look at me. I'm growing.
JOEY: Hey, uh, you can't recycle yearbooks, can you?
JOEY: You want his yearbook?
MONICA: Oh, gosh, this is so weird. I mean, his whole life was in this apartment, and now it's gone. You know, I think it would be nice if we just took a few moments, for Mr. Heckles. I mean, he was kind of a pain, he was, but, he was a person. You're all going to hell.
CHANDLER: Takin' that with you, huh?
ROSS: You comin'?
ALISON: Oh, my major was totally useless. I mean, how often do you look in the classifieds and see "Philosopher wanted"?
CHANDLER: Sure. (My god, that's a big head! It didn't look this big in the office. Maybe it's the lighting. My head must look like a golf ball at work. All right, don't get hung up on it, quick, quick, list five things you like about her: Nice smile, good dresser...Big head, big head, big head!)
Monica: That was you?!
Phoebe: Yeah, but if I do tell him, then hes gonna hate myself. I mean look at him and his Mom, I cant. (pause) But, you guys can, please you gotta talk him out of it.
Rachel: (opening the door) Y'know what, I want you to leave! Get outta here!
Ross: Aw, yknow Yknow, maybe were-were just approaching this all wrong. If youre Chandler and-and you wanna hide, where is the last place on Earth people would think youd go?
CHANDLER: See ya. [shuts the door] Goodbuy you fruit drying psychopath. So you want me to help you unpack your stuff?
Phoebe: Oh my God, are you guys okay?
Cop: Yeah, but I kinda don't have a choice, it's my job. I mean, you understand right?
Rachel: Wh(Turns and looks at the gang whos staring)Why dont I tell you over here? (She walks Melissa away from the gang.)
Chandler: The cameras? Remember last night I told you to take them?
Gunther: Are you all right?
Rachel: Okay, see? I told you!
Estelle: Yeah, what time do you wanna pick me up? (Joey hangs up on her.) Hello?
Ross: Yes. Yes. Dont worry. Everythings fine. Well uh, well see you tomorrow at the wedding.
Chandler: You!
Rachel: And you know Monica and Ross!
Monica: Don't you just love it?
Ross: (to Monica) You like it right?
CHANDLER: Ahh, I believe my exact words were, 'Flaign,en - sten'. I mean I didn't know what to say, how do you know if you wanna do it on an elevator?
Rachel: (To Joey) I cant believe that you yelled at my boss! Im-Im gonna lose my job! What am I going to do?!
Pete: Yeah, a slice of cheesecake and-and a date if youre given em out.
Monica: No, thank you! You have given me so much! I mean, if it wasn't for you, I would never have gotten to sing Memories on the stage at the Wintergarden Theater!
Mr. Geller: Oh yeah, well who serves steak when theres no place to sit, I mean how are you supposed to eat this?
Rachel: Yknow Joey, I could teach you to sail if you want.
ROSS: I've no idea, could be. Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight. RACHEL: Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight. [they kiss] ROSS: You're not laughing. RACHEL: This time it's not so funny. [They kiss and start undressing. As Rachel tries to pull off Ross's tie she catches it in his mouth. Then they roll across the fur rug.] RACHEL: Ah, oh God. Oh, honey, oh that's OK. ROSS: What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box. RACHEL: Oh, thank God. [Scene: Museum of Natural History. The next morning Rachel and Ross are sleeping in the display under a fur.] ROSS: Hi. RACHEL: Hi you. I can't believe I'm waking up next to you. ROSS: I know it is pretty unbelievaaaaah. RACHEL: What? ROSS: We're not alone. [A church youth group is outside the display watching them] CLOSING CREDITS [Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. They are still in their chairs, watching Beavis and Butthead.] [they're laughing along with the show when an alarm goes off] JOEY: Is that the fire alarm? CHANDLER: Yeah. [feels the floor] Oh it's not warm yet, we still have time. JOEY: Cool.
Ross: No, four minutes ago you had a half hour, we have to be out the door at twenty to eight.
Monica: Oh, thats great! I mean Im-Im sorry, but Im so happy for you. And now I can work for you!
Phoebe: Oh, you say someones name enough, they turn around.
Mr Zelner: This may surprise you, but re-hiring fired employees, is not my main job.
PHOEBE: I know you're just moving uptown but I'm really gonna miss you.
Monica: What one? You wanted him to invite you to the party and he did it!
Rachel: Wow, you know what? That is the best fake speech I think Ive ever heard.
Phoebe: You know who shaved you? That was me.
Joey: Oh, you bet I am!
Rachel: You remember when we got these?
Ross: No youre not.
Amy walks over to the couch and sits down next to Rachel: Ucch. <pauses> Uchh <louder this time> In case you hadn't noticed, I'm not talking to you.
Chandler: Do either of you have the keys?
Rachel: I can see that. You look like you slept with a hanger in your mouth.
Ross: Come here, come here. Uh, (He takes the earring out.) ow! Emily, will you marry me?
Phoebe: Oh...you don't have to go, I have something that will fit you.
Rachel: Oh Phoebe, I'm so happy for you honey. (she gives her a kiss)
Jill: And yknow what I said to him? "Im gonna hire a lawyer and Im gonna sue you and take all your money. Then Im gonna cut you off!"
Kathy: No, youre my first. Put the money on the table.
Monica: Hey, what are you doing? You gotta save room, youve got almost an entire turkey to eat.
Phoebe: All right, all right, well just do our best. Okay? So lets say Im the interviewer and Im meeting you for the first time. Okay. "Hi! Come on in, Im uh, Regina Philange."
Monica: Deep Impact was the one with Robert Duval, Armageddon is whats going to happen to you if you wake me up.
Ross: A big idiot. Just you have to realize is, this whole Mark thing is kinda hard for me.
Phoebe: Ooh, I have to tell you something.
Phoebe: But I cant tell you.
Monica: Do you want me to pick you?!
Chandler: What? (turns around quickly still ready to throw the dart and Joey quickly ducks and hides behind the chair) What are you, what are you talking about?
PHOEBE: Monica, how did this happen? I thought you had this all planned out.
Mr. Franklin: Hey-hey! Bing? Was that Bob from six you were just talking too?
Rachel: Well yknow what? I hope Monica forgives you after you throw her, her vegetarian, voodoo, goddess circley shower! (Runs out.)
Monica: Phoebe, you have to lift it and point.
CHANDLER: Eddie, do you remember yesterday?
Chandler: I can't believe her! Did she tell you we were having money problems?
Charlie: Hum, so, I started to say you something earlier, hum... (pause) There was another reason I realized it was time to end it with Joey. I kind of realized I... was starting to have feelings... for someone else.
Chandler: Youd think that would embarrass me, but you see Im maxed out.
Chandler: What are you guys? Like a gang or something?!
MONICA: Oh it's not big, not at all, you know, kinda the same lines as, say, oh I don't know, having a third nipple.
Monica: Look, not that I enjoy talking about people who I went to high school with, cause I do, but umm, maybe we could talk about something else? Like you, I dont even know where you work?
Joey: So what're you going to do?
JOEY: Thank you. Wait wait wait wait, you see me again. Hang on, the guy's butt's blockin' me. There I am, there I am, there I am, there I am, there I am. . .
Monica: Im glad youre here, we have a couple of things to ask you about the wedding ceremony.
Monica: I justI cant believe that you think that you and Chandler know me and Rachel better than we know you.
Rachel: (To Joey) Yeah I knowIm goodI got it! (Joey slowly backs away.) (To the boy) Now wait a minute, Ive got one more thing I have to say to you oh right! Shut up!
Monica: Joey, you had the night!
Rachel: Oh! Whoops! Im sorry, you were talking about Emily!
Phoebe: Oh my god! Where are you? (Looks around.)
Phoebe: Okay. I have just a few questions to ask so I'm going to get out my official forms. (She picks up a couple of crumpled receipts.) Okay, so, question 1) You and uh, you were married to Francis' daughter Lilly, is that correct?
Ross: Oh what are you kidding? Shes gorgeous, its all Rachel.
Monica: Thank you so much for seeing us. Phoebe has told us such great things about you guys.
Monica: What are you the memory woman?
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
Rachel: Ross, why didnt you tell me that?
Joey: Havent you ever read the same book over and over again?
Joey: Are you sure?
Chandler: See, you think it's just a pen, but then you turn it over and it's also a clock.
Joey: But you said one.
Rachel: You see, now, I would date this girl. Shes cute, shes outdoorsy, you know, and she knows how to build a fire. I mean, thats got to come in handy
JOEY: And, and just so you know, if you wanted to expand this scene like, like have the cab crash or somethin', I could attend to the victims 'cause I have a background in medical acting.
Monica: Okay thats it. I give up. At mom and dads 40th anniversary, youre the one giving the speech.
MONICA: Man, man that is sharp. It must have cost you quite a few debloons.
Ross: Because I folded it up and put in my pants pocket. Do you...do you not look there?
Krista: Oh, this is so good (A piece of cake.) you have got to try it. (She takes some on her finger and feeds it to Danny. Then takes a little more and does it again. Meanwhile, the rest of the gang stares on in shock. Then they pick up a part of it and some filling falls into his lap.)
Joey: All right, uh (To Ross) Oh hey, youve done this before Ross, well what did you say when you made up your vows?
Chandler: Hey, you guys in the living room all know what you want to do. You know, you have goals. You have dreams. I don't have a dream.
Rachel: And hey! Just so you know, its not that common! It doesnt happen to every guy! And it is a big deal!!
Phoebe: Earl, youre not hearing me! All Im saying is that youre not alone all right? Everybody hates the people they work with! (One of her coworkers overhears that, and she mimes that she didnt mean him.)
Monica: Joey, now that you're okay with the house, do you wanna go see your room?
Phoebe: No, Mike, I don't want to kill him! I thought we were just gonna capture him and, and you know, set him free in the country side where he can maybe meet a friendly possom and a wisecracking owl.
Rachel: Hey, listen umm, what-what are you doing tonight?
MONICA: You heard the woman. Peel, chop, devil! I can't believe I lost 2 minutes.
Rachel: Ok. (She sits on the bed and Ross sits near her) Thank you for coming with me today.
Phoebe: Yknow, I dont-I dont think its you. This is a freaky place. (To All) Hey! Guys! (Everyone looks up.) (To Earl) Oh no, its you.
Ross: And then, you try to make the best of a bad situation, so you float the idea of a threesome?
Joey: Well, it turns out you were right C.H.E.E.S.E.
Monica: Yeah. Where were you?
Mona: Ohh! (Hugs him.) And I love spending time with you. (Ross isnt happy.)