words in movies
Phoebe: Oh hey Ross oh I'm so glad someone's here could you zip me up?
Phoebe: Thank you. Can you believe no-one between my apartment and here offered to do that for me?
Ross: people (shakes head, they sit) so why you all dressed up.
Phoebe: oh I dunno I dunno, you know I mean I like him but am I ready to take my grade a loins off the meat market.
Ross: you know I really admire your whole dating attitude, it's so healthy I'm always like is this moving to fast? Is this moving to slow? Where's this going?
Phoebe: yea you know you are a bit of a drama queen.
Ross: but you, your so much better off you just go from guy to guy having fun and never worrying that it terns into anything serious.
Phoebe: I wouldn't say never, you know there's that guy (pause) well what about (pause) ok well there's gotta be someone.
Ross: I know and yet here you are all ready for the next date.
Ross: no, no, no there's nothing wrong with you I mean you don't strike me as the type of person that wants to get married anyway.
Mike: Hey, so are you sure your ready to go.
Ross: do you have a compact in your purse?
Ross: you look great.
Joey: Hey, this girl won't turn around and I can't tell whether she's hot or not, what do you think?
Monica:: Joey I am not going to objectify woman with you (looks at the woman) but if her face is as nice as her ass woah mamma.
Joey: Alright thanks, Oh hey have you talked to Chandler?
Joey: oh why don't you fly out there and surprise him.
Joey: oh and you know what you should bring the black see-through teddy with the attached garters. (Nods)
Monica:: how do you know I have one of those?
Hayley: oh I thought you said Hi.
Hayley: I would love to go out with you.
Joey: really, great, did I actually ask you?
Hayley: no that's just where you were going I just figured that I'd help you out, you don't seem like the kind of guy that does this very a lot.
Joey: (turns round again) seriously Gunther you should see someone about that cold, if it gets much worse you could DIE! (Gunther looks scared)
Phoebe: well it was awful every time I thought about what you said I started crying.
Phoebe: would you call this girl? (Puts on a crying act) thanks-fo-r-a-love-ly-even-ing
Phoebe: well you not what you should feel terrible about, this could have been my serious guy he was sweet and smart and funny. Do you know how hard it is to meet a guy like that?
Hayley: (laughs) your welcome again, I'm gonna make some coffee can I get you anything?
Joey: do you have any cake?
>>> Joey's Subconscious So this is going pretty good. dinner was nice, got a lot in common. (Sees a magazine) Victoria's secret huh we even like the same books. (Walks over to a painting on the wall) Oh now there's a scary painting. wait a minute I think I've been scared by that painting before. (Looks around) You know what this whole place look familiar I have definitely been in this apartment I know I've seen this weird plant before (it's a cactus and he touch's it) AWCH! It did that the last time. Oh my god, I've gone out with this girl before yeah we had sex on this couch and then on that chair and no. no we didn't do it hear which is weird because it seems like a perfectly good place.
Mike: Sure (looks confused) who are you?
Ross: yeah I really, really need to talk to you about something.
Mike: Ok, unless you're not gonna try to get me to join a cult are you?
Mike: oh it's just you have that look (shuts the front door)
Ross: oh no yeah, no Phoebe is great, but umm I'm an idiot look right before you guys went out I accidentally got her all upset.
Ross: yes, yeah I said something stupid about her never having had a serious relationship, but you should know she is so much fun, a wonderful person please don't blow her off.
Mike: I'm not blowing her off, I actually just got off the phone with her, were going out tomorrow night, I mean I hope that's ok with you stranger from the coffee house.
Ross: well then I didn't need to bother you or the four other Mike Hanagens I bothered.
Mike: hey wait wait wait wait wait! Is that true what you said Phoebe's never had a serious relationship?
Mike: but you did say it
Rachel: Oh that couldn't have been pretty. but you know guys do that.
Rachel: well watching sharks? Are you sure that's what he was doing?
Monica:: do you know how many times I've seen him jump up like that, believe me I know what he was doing.
Rachel: man sharks. I always knew there was something weird about that dude. But you promised to love him no matter what.
Rachel: Ah! You know what honey guys are just different, they like things that we can't understand, you know I once dated this guy who wanted to pretend he was an archeologist and I was a naughty cave woman that he unfroze from a block of ice.
Monica:: Eww are you talking about my bother.
Monica:: But you don't remember sleeping with her.
Joey: yeah but she should remember sleeping with me I am very memorable, you guys know.
Rachel: what, how do we know, we never slept with you.
Monica:: what's the big deal, you forgot, she forgot, maybe you were having an off night
Monica:: Honey why don't you just let it go and ask her out again.
Rachel: yeah your both so slutty you don't even remember who you've slept with, you're made for each other.
Monica:: you don't think sharks are sexy do you?
Phoebe: What? Wha-wha-wha-did you do ROSS!
Ross: oh boy you got mad at that part. I went over there to tell him how great you are but you know me BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, and I ended up telling him that.
Ross: umm. that you had a six year long relationship with a guy named Vicrum.
Phoebe: (Walks towards Ross) If you hadn't just had a baby with my best friend I swear to Lucifer a raber dog would be feasting on your danglers RIGHT NOW!
Ross: well Phoebe, I think you'll feel better when you know a little bit about Vicrum, His a Kite designer (He makes a wow face) and he used to date Oprah. (He makes another wow face)
Phoebe: I'm not going along with some lie you made Ross, No I'm just gonna be honest with him.
Phoebe: yeah I've nothing to be ashamed of ok so I haven't been in a relationship that lasted longer then a month. Ok I haven't had a real boyfriend you know if he can't handle that he can leave. which he will and that's ok. so I'll just be alone forever you know alright I'll be. it'll be fine. it'll be fine. I'll go walking tours with widows and lesbians. Oh (takes a deep breath and sits down, knock on the door)
Mike: (Ross opens the door) You know I'm trying to think of the last time I opened a door and you weren't there, Phoebe are you ok? (She has her hands over her mouth)
Phoebe: Uh huh yeah (stands up) there's just something umm, there's something you should know (Pause) Vicrum just called.
Joey: Uh huh, sure, yeah. How can you not remember me?
Joey: How could you not remember that we slept together?
Hayley: I really, really think I would remember sleeping with you
Joey: come on, come on, search your brain all right. it was (thinks) a certain amount of time ago, I was here you were here, we had sex (starts pointing out the places) here, here, here NOT there. Anything?
Joey: my god woman! How many people do you have to had been with not to remember any of this?
Joey: Ooooooooooh, I slept with you! And you obviously remember me Hey! I still got it. (Turns back to Hayley) so were good. (She just glares at him) I'll let myself out.
Phoebe: .and I said Vicrum you can't just call every time you get lonely you know, you, you gave up that right when you slept with Rachel.
Phoebe: yeah well (pause) yeah you know Emma's birth certificate might say Geller but her eyes say Mookurgee.
Phoebe: I know but he call's and my heart goes to him. You know that bastard is one smooth talking free lance kite designer.
Mike: I just think there's somebody better out there for you, (pause) I mean I'm not saying me but. maybe me.
Mike: and you don't have to worry about glue sniffing with me. although I do smell the occasional magic marker, yeah ah anyway I just think I can make you happy.
Phoebe: well there is no Vicrum, Ross made him up because I never really have been in a long-term relationship, I've never lived with a guy, and I've never even celebrated an anniversary so. (Pause) if that's too weird for you and you wanna leave I totally understand. In fact I'll close my eye's make it less awkward (She sits with her eyes closed and Mike kisses her, Phoebe opens her eyes and like a little child says.) You kissed me.
Phoebe: so you don't think I'm a total freak
Mike: No. well look can I think your weird and also cool for telling me the truth and also wanna kiss you.
Phoebe: I guess so, can I. can I think it's cool that you kiss me and also wanna kiss you again (they get closer to kiss and Phoebe pulls back) and umm, be a little concerned about the magic markers.
Monica:: Here why don't you sit down, get yourself comfortable because I. (Monica shows him the tape then puts it in) have a little surprise for you.
Monica:: Ok (sits down next to him) This is how much I love you. (She presses play then puts her arm around Chandler's neck.)
Monica:: Is this not the good part? Do you want me to fast forward to something a little toothier.
Chandler: no I'm not quite sure you got the right movie that's all.
Monica:: Honey look we can do something else, do you want me to get into the tub and thrash.
Monica:: sweetie it's ok, I still love you, let me be a part of this.
Monica:: I saw what you were doing in Tulsa. angry sharks turn you on!
Monica:: then why were you watching them and giving YOURSELF a treat.
Chandler: OH MY GOD! When you came in I switched the channel, I was just watching regular porn
Monica:: I cannot tell you how happy that makes me! (They hug)
Chandler: You are an amazing wife. (Monica shrugs) No really you're amazing you were actually gonna do this for me, I mean where do you find the strength and understanding over something like that.
Phoebe: you know maybe this is a wake up call, about your whole dating attitude. Your in your thirty's and you've never had a serious relationship and you have never been in a long term relationship, here you go from woman to woman, meaningless experience to meaningless experience never even worrying that it doesn't tern into anything serious.
Mr. Geller: (To Ross) Do you remember the Ludwins? The big one had a thing for you, didn't she?
Monica: Oh, hi, Ross. Yeah. There's someone I want you to say hi to. (to Chandler) He just happened to call.
ROSS: Oh, thank you, thanks. So uh, how was your night last night?
RACHEL: What you got there? Something else that's not yours that you can break?
Phoebe: Hang on! Hang on! Hang on! (Answering the phone.) Go!! Whos this? (Listens) Oh okay, youre gonna like working for me. Whats your name? (Listens) What kind of name is Brendy? I Whatever Stop talking! All right, from now on your name is Joan. You can pick your own last name.
The Professor: Do you have a moment to talk about your lecture?
Chandler: Hey, come on, you came through, you did what you had to do. That is very dad.
Phoebe: So... What's the deal with umm, you and Joey?
Rachel: Yeah, yeah and you know what, I know she's gonna wanna run again, I just don't know how to get out of it, I mean, I live with her.
Monica: All right, Rachel, I know-I know you think I'm crazy, please, before you tell him you love him, just-just try to find one person who thinks this is a good idea. Because I bet you, you can't.
Waitress: Can I get you some coffee?
SUSIE: Well I was thinking it would be um, kind of sexy if you wore mine tonight, at dinner.
Phoebe: You know, the strippers, and the guys dancing, and you know, pee-pee's flying about.
Phoebe: (thinking to herself) Chandlers knees. Chandlers ankles. Chandlers ankle hair. (notices the clock) Oh no. (to Rick) Okay, youre all set.
Ross: I don’t know. Phoebe, if one of us saw Mike with another woman would you want us to tell you?
Joey: Oh-no-no-no, you are! You do this, you give me the great advice, and hey listen, I was thinking about what you said yesterday about focusing on one woman, Im gonna do that.
Rachel: Oh Joey, Im sorry I just couldnt tell her all those things you wanted me to tell her. And yknow we got to talking and I
RYAN: We can't scratch. You know we can't, we'll scar.
Monica: It's this dumb thing that Ross made up `cause he was trying to fool our parents. It's a way of giving the finger, without actually having to give it. I remember I cried the night you made it up, `cause it was the first time that I realized that I was actually cooler than my older brother.
Chandler: Oh I used too, but then Joey thought it would be fun to go to Central Park and hit rocks at bigger rocks. (He starts to leave and stops an entering Rachel.) Hey Rach, do you have a tennis racquet?
Monica: What are you, animals? It's 4 o'clock in the afternoon!
Ross: Come on Rach, you dont have what, ten minutes?
Joey: Come on, season tickets! Season tickets, do you know what that means?
Rachel: Yeah, maybe if youre in love. But Ross, we are not in love, are we?
Phoebe: Oh, well that's ok. I think you and I will do much better if you're just... here as a bridesmaid.
David: Are... are you kidding? You know, when you don't see someone for a long time, a-a-and you kind of build them up in your head and you start thinking about: Come on, don't be crazy. Nobody is that beautiful, but... well, you are. (Phoebe seems very charmed) Well, so, uhm... are you seeing... anyone? (Phoebe is still up on a cloud from what David just said)
RACHEL: (to Ross) Ok.� So now, I think Emma is probably down for the night, but if you need anything Ross . . .
Rachel: Oh, I can not believe you didnt tell me!
JOEY: Listen, uh, I don't know when I'm gonna see you again. CHANDLER: Well, I'm guessing uh, tonight at the coffee house. JOEY: Right, yeah. OK. Um, take care. CHANDLER: Yeah. [Joey walks out and after a few seconds comes back in and gives Chandler a big hug. He then leaves for good and Chandler is left alone in his apartment.] CLOSING CREDITS
Ross: Look, I was nervous! You guys had me all worried I was going to be boring! I got up there and they were all like staring at me. I opened my mouth and this British accent just came out.
Ross: You guys.
Phoebe: Oh, we're just... we're sad to go so we're just saying goodbye to the hotel. (hugs the wall) I love you... Paradise Hotel, Golf resort and Spa... (she walks away from the wall)
Joey: You got screwed.
Bitsy: The woman you what? (Phoebe overheard what Michael said and now enters the room)
MR. GELLER: Uhh, naa, no no no, I, I must be thinking of someone else, uh, maybe me. Don't you have some folding to do? Go fold dear. Fold. You fold. [shuffles her into her room]
Phoebe: Anyway, you did what you had to do. I'm okay.
Joey: Sure! As long as they dont find out you can keep whatever you want! And I want you to have it.
Monica: Dad! Theres Ross (points), why dont you go talk to him?
Ross: Yeah, y'know what? I'll take it myself, thank you! (He signs the form and hands it back to the salesman.) All right Rach, let's go! (He picks up one end of the couch.)
Phoebe: I know you didnt, I was talking about Monica.
Joey: Yeah, come on, think about it. Youre 18, okay, shes 44, when youre 36, shes gonna be 88.
RACHEL: This is Joey, and Phoebe, and this is Chandler, and you remember Ross.
Phoebe: Oh, you're no ordinary roommate are you?
Monica: Do you wanna live outside?! Because its gettin cold! (To Phoebe) She gets tons of catalogs and umm, shell fold down the pages of the things she thinks that Id like.
Monica: Wow! Thats great! Dad must really like you, he doesnt ask just anyone to play.
Chandler: Listen, it's kind of an emergency. Well, I guess you know that, or we'd be in the predicament room. (The receptionist glares at him.)
Joshua: Oh, that-that would be great. So you didnt even get to Italy?
Rachel: Oh no, Im sorry, you look a lot different from the last time I-I saw you.
Paul: Thank you! Thank you so much!
Ross: Eh, you think? I mean, you went out with a guy who improved the accuracy of radiocarbon dating by a factor of 10!
Rachel: Oh and it was great to see you too. And you look fantastic, although you missed a button.
CHANDLER: Monica, I feel like you should have German subtitles.
Ross: Hey-hey have you ever locked yourself in a TV cabinet VD boy?!
Chandler: Oh, just hanging out, talkin about uh, websites. (Joey laughs.) Yeah, we saw this really interesting website about marriage and how totally unnecessary it is and how its just a way for the government to keep tabs on you.
Lauren: Ill see you tomorrow. (she kisses him full on the mouth.)
Chandler: No-no-no! I am the king of bad Thanksgivings. You can't just swoop in here with your bad marriage and take that away from me.
Rachel: No way. No way did you do this.
Monica: How do you do that?
Monica: You know Paul?
Phoebe: Hey! Hey, did you get your invitation to Rosss wedding?
Chandler: Oh, how well you know me...
Chandler: Monica can I talk to you outside for a minute?
Ross: You got a job?
Rachel: Thank you.
The Salesman: Well you, her, I mean, she's very y'know. And you're like y'know.
Ross: Yeah, sure, why not? In fact, if you know anyone that would be good for me...
Monica: All right, you ready?
Monica: You can, I know you can!
Chandler: SoIf you wear that youll make mine less special.
MONICA: Doctor, can I see you for just a minute please? My brother has a slight phobia about needles.
Rachel: Oh, Im sorry! Do you need the phone?
Monica: Honey, you know I think you're hilarious! Come on, you know that joke you told me last week? The one about Jerry Lewis and the girl with the lazy eye...? (he laughs) That slayed me.
Monica: (trying desperately to change the subject) So, Ross, what's going on with you? Any stories? (Digs her elbow into his hand.) No news, no little anecdotes to share with the folks?
Monica: Oh, so you finally took it out of the marina huh?
Chandler: I always liked you, Ken. (takes a cigarette)
Chandler: (coming up under center, just like a real quarterback does, and puts his hands between Rosss legs.) Twenty-three!! Seventy-four!! (Ross stands up and looks at him) You wanna go shotgun?
Monica: You be okay?
Ross: You think?! God, I, ah, Im in hell. I mean what, what am I gonna do? Rachels all like, I love you and, and lets work on this. And all I can think about is, What is she gonna do? What is she gonna say? when I tell her what I did.
Chandler: (realizes what Ross just said and the implications to him) I am mad! But you know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna forgive you! Because that's what friends do! They forgive their friends when they do everything you just said, all on the list there. Well, but I want you to remember that I forgave you.
Monica: Cause if you do that means youd be cancelling it for me, and were just friends.
Rachel: Hey, look, you guys, I'm going for anything here, OK? I cannot be a waitress anymore, I mean it. I'm sick of the lousy tips, I'm sick of being called 'Excuse me...'
Joey: And Chandler I cant believe I let you pay for this one. (They hug and he whispers in his ear.) Thanks man.
Chandler: No, because youre not a grandmother!
Joey: (proud) I know, but, I made a huge mistake. I never should have broken up with her. Will you help me? Please?
JOEY: Oh, can you believe they gave Stephanie skin cancer?
Mr. Waltham: In a moment, please, Im in the middle of a task. And you have a customer.
Monica: You guys, I ordered some chocolate pies from that bakery on Bleecker. Could you pick them up for me?
Joey: Hey Ross, listen, you want anything to drink, cause Im heading up there.
Phoebe: It's ok. I thought of the perfect lie for you. It's easy to remember and doesn't invite a lot of questions. You weren't at the parade because you had a family emergency.
Phoebe: Yes. Yes! Fine! I am someone! You want me to say it? I have doubts! (Pause) I'm sorry! (Puts her head down.)
Monica: Its good to see you too.
Rachel: But, Pheebs, you can still use the copy machine where I actually work. But, just come by at lunch so my boss doesnt see you. Cause Kim will just freak out and she already doesnt like me very much.
Ross: This is helping your career?! Huh? I thought you wanted to be an actor not the creator of crazy lawsuit game!
Rachel: Monica...would you please tell Joey that he is a pig?
Chandler: (To Ross) Youre going down.
ROSS: No, no, uh, it's not what you think. It's um the other thing.
Rachel: Yeah! Wait a minute, its been a long time that Ive been single. How come you never offered this before?
Ross: No I didn't, and you want to know why? Because your ex-boyfriend is still in love with you.
Phoebe: (muffled through the floor) Yeah, look I was with my friend downstairs and we hear everything up here that you do, and I am sick and tired... (I tired but the rest is unintelligible).
All: Hey! You're in a play! I didn't know you could dance! You had a beard!