words in movies
Chandler: What are you guys doing?
Chandler: No, there are great pictures of you standing next to a guy whos going like this (Makes what can only be described as a toothy frown. Henceforth, this shall be known as The Face.)
Phoebe: Oh my God! Thats the creep that youre with at the Statue of Liberty.
Phoebe: Hey, why dont you guys go, get portraits done by a professional photographer.
Monica: Chandler what do you say?
Chandler: All right, but I should warn you, Im not going. Im going. (Does The Face while saying that last part.)
Ross: Oh, you guys call him Cute Coffeehouse Guy, we call him Hums While He Pees.
Phoebe: (returning) Hey you guys, Hums While He Pees just asked me out!
Phoebe: He is! But hes getting divorcedRoss! Maybe you know him.
Phoebe: You dont have to be back for a half-hour!
Chandler: Rach, if you have a crush on this guy, why would you hire him? I mean yknow you cant date him right?
Ross: Soon hell be able to call you, that lady he knew who got fired.
Phoebe: So you wouldnt mind if he was dating someone else?
Rachel: Oh, great could you make me four copies of those?
The Photographer: (taking pictures) Great! Thats great Monica! Great! Now, Chandler, you want to give us a smile?
Monica: Chandler, listen to me sweetie, I know you can do this. Okay? You have a beautiful smile.
Monica: Yeah! (They turn to the camera, and Chandler does The Face again.) All right, maybe you dont have to smile. Lets try something else. Lets try umm, try looking sexy.
Chandler: Okay. (Youll have to see it, I cant describe the face he makes, but it isnt good.)
Rachel: Hi Joey! What are you doing here?
Joey: Uhh, well Ive got an audition down the street and I spilled sauce all over the front of my shirt. (Removes his hand to reveal a huge sauce stain.) You got an extra one?
Joey: Great. (He doesnt like it.) You got anything thats not Ralph Lauren?
Rachel: Hey, listen umm, what-what are you doing tonight?
Rachel: How would you feel about taking out my assistant Tag? Ill pay.
Rachel: Im not asking you to go on a date with him!
Ross: I like this one. (Points to it.) It seems to say, "I love you and thats why I have to kill you."
Monica: They cant all be bad. (To Chandler) Find the one where you make your bedroom eyes. Ohh, there it is.
Chandler: Oh my God! Those are my bedroom eyes?! Why did you ever sleep with me?
Monica: Do you really want to pull at that thread?
Hums While He Pees: Hey uh, I dont mean to be presumptuous but I have these two tickets to the ballroom dancing finals tomorrow night if you want to go?
Phoebe: Yeah, umm thats Whitney (Points), Kyles ex-wife out there, now do you think that you can yknow divert her so that we can slip out?
Ross: Look, I dont think so Pheebs. (Pause) All right, Ill do it. But just because youre a friend. (Grabs the tickets and heads to divert Whitney.)
Phoebe: All right, well I just wanted to say thank you though for diverting Kyles ex.
Ross: Oh yeahNoYoure welcome. Well talk about it later.
Whitney: Hi Ross! You ready for breakfast?
Phoebe: (To Ross) Kyles ex-wife? You were supposed to divert her not date her!
Ross: (opens the door and to Whitney) Hi! Im sorry, but can you give me a second while I talk to this woman, who by the way did not spend the night.
Phoebe: Like shes really mean, and shes over critical, and-andNo! She will paint a room a really bright color without even checking with you!
Ross: Fine! Thank you for warning me. At breakfast Ill be on full alert for room painting and sex weapons.
Phoebe: Youre still gonna go out with her?!
Phoebe: Well, didnt you just hear what I said?!
Ross: Pheebs come on! I mean, consider the source! Of course her ex-husbands gonna say that stuff. Now, if youll excuse me
Phoebe: You see? Nothing is good enough for her!
Rachel: Hi Tag! Hey, so did you have fun with uh, with Joey last night?
Rachel: Wo-women? You mean like old women?
Rachel: Thats great! Wow man, so Joey mustve really taught you some stuff huh?
Tag: (To her, in the Joey voice) How you doin?
Joey: See? Thats a great smile! Easy. Natural. Now, pretend I have a camera. (Chandler immediately does The Face.) Youre changing it!
Joey: All right, all right, all right, all right, you wanna know what I do when I take resume shots?
Joey: Okay, firstfirst of all, you want to make it look spontaneous. I look down (Looks down), look down, keep looking down; then I look up. (Looks up and smiles.) See? All right, now you try. Look down (Chandler looks down), youre looking down, keep looking down
Rachel: So uh, heard you had some fun with Tag last night.
Rachel: Yeah and you had fun teaching him how to be all Joey.
Joey: Hey well, you cant teach someone to be good with women. Yknow, thats why I never had any luck with Chandler.
Rachel: All right, would-would you mind just not going out with him again? Okay, just the idea of you and he and all these women, its justAnd I know hes my assistant and I cant date himbut it just bothers me, all right?!
Joey: Hey! No-no-no-no, you cant take him away from me! I got a great partner to pick up girls with! Finally!!
Rachel: All right, will you, will you at least tell him how hollow and unsatisfying this, dating tons of women thing is!
Rachel: I just dont want him to meet anybody until I am over my crushAnd I will get over it. Its-its not like I love him, its just physical! ButI mean I get crushes like this all the time! I mean hell, I had a crush on you when I first met ya!
Chandler: Did you have a crush on me, when you first met me?
Chandler: Can you people not see me?! (He waves his arms around to get their attention.)
Rachel: (To Joey) So, will you talk to him?
Rachel: Oh, come on! Ill give you ten free Ralph Lauren shirts.
Joey: One! (Pause.) No ten! You said ten! You cant take that back!
Tag: Hey Joey, you wanted to talk to me?
Joey: I dont know. You uh, you got something for me?
Joey: Yeah, for you!
Monica: (seeing him approach) Hey! There you are!
Monica: Are you okay?
Monica: Chandler, what were you thinking?
Ross: Listen, you are hearing one side of the story, okayand F.Y.I she mustve shown Kyle over 30 paint samples before she painted that room! And his response to each one was, "I dont give a tiny rats ass."
Phoebe: You think hes emotionally unavailable?
Ross: (angrily) I knew you were gonna throw that in my face!! That was three years ago! She apologized and she apologized! What more do you want?!!
Ross: So do we!! So do we!! (Ross notices a couple has been staring at them.) Im sorry you had to see that.
Rachel: Hi! (He hands her, her mail) Thanks, hey so uh whatd you do last night?
Tag: Its just not really who I am. Y'know, Ive always been happier when Why am I telling you this? You dont care about this stuff.
Rachel: Oh no, yes I do! I do! I mean, come on go on, you were, you were saying I am happier when uh, yknow?
Tag: Uh-huh! Let me ask you something?
Tag: Do you believe that there is one perfect person for everyone?
Tag: And if that person is already in your life, you should do something about it right?
Kyle: Oh hey! Good, youre both here.
Phoebe: Both of you together?
Phoebe: Oh right, because youre so capable of change.
Ross: Thats all right, we-we dont need you. In fact, hey Im over it already.
Ross: (To Phoebe) Im sorry. Ugh, Pheebs, you were, you were right about her. Yknow, she did try to use sex as a weapon! Yeah, I hurt my back a little.
Phoebe: And yknow, even if they break up again, youd better not let him in your sad mens club!
Phoebe: You guys make a very attractive couple. (The camera cuts to a shot of the picture and we see that Monica is posing with Joey instead of Chandler.)
Kathy's Co-Star: Sooo, youve been doing this long?
Chandler: Yeah, because if I was at my old job we'd say 300 million? No thank you!
Monica: Seriously, you don't think we should tell him?
Ross: (entering) Pheebs, you mind if I speak to Rachel alone for a sec?
Mr Zelner: Ah, did she ask you to come here and do this?
The Interviewer: Now youll be heading a whole division, so youll have a lot of duties.
Mr. Waltham: Ahh, then you have to give us the lawn ornaments.
Phoebe: Yknow, this is probably none of my business, but werent you guys supposed to not be seen in public together?
Phoebe: (points to herself) Phoebe. (points to her) Phoebe. Phoebe, yeah. She named me after you I guess.
Monica: Damnit Phoebe! How did you even call him?
Joey: Hey, Im not interested in her sweater! Its whats underneath her sweater that counts. And besides, since ah, since when do you care who Im going out with?
Joey: Why are you taking this away from me?
Joey: You dont think I know that!
Monica: (answers the phone) Hello? (Listens.) (To Phoebe) It's Joey. (Phoebe's proud of herself.) (To Joey) I'm so glad you called! Chandler told me what happened. Y'know he's really upset about it.
Janine: No! I mean you're a really nice guy and I'm happy to be your roommate and your friend, I'm just y'know, I just don't feel that way about you.
Chandler: You know how to use a compass?
Ross: So, you’re not going to Paris.
Monica: Yes Rachel, why do you care so much?
Rachel: Ooh, I just wish we hadnt lost those four months, but if time was what you needed just to gain a little perspective...
Joey: Careful! Youre wasting good pastrami! (Gasps.) Oh my God! Im my dad!
Kori: You sick freak, who does that? I can't believe I had a crush on you! (she leaves and slams the door behind her)
Joey: (impressed) You blow me away.
Benjamin: Charlie! My God, you look absolutely stunning!
Monica: Y'know, I-I-I don't think that I can. So if you don't mind, maybe this will be it for me on the work things.
Gunther: ...and after youve delivered the drinks, you take the empty tray....
Monica: You should feel great about yourself! You're doing this amazing independence thing!
Monica: Okay, you come up with an idea.
Amy: Myron. Hmm... I told you he was old!
Mr Zelner: Okay, you got it.
Joey: You sure are naming a lot of ways to postpone sex, Ill tell ya
Chandler: This is bringing out a lovely color in you!
Rachel: Have you ever had any weird romantic dreams?
Mr Zelner: You can really arrange that?
Chandler: I never stopped loving you.
Rachel: Yeah! You can hook it up to your TV and you get radio!
Janice: Chandler, what are you talking about?
Phoebe: (Turning to Mike) What do you think?
Rachel: (as she's being dragged) What are you? Monica!! Stop it!! Oh my God! Stop it! (Monica drags her totally onto the floor and on her back.)
Ross: So, what are you gonna do?
Ursula: Right, why do you keep saying that?
Richards Date: Well, I just wanted to see where you lived. Now, give me the tour.
Rachel: Yeah, but then you spent Phoebe's entire birthday party talking to my breasts, so then I figured maybe not.
Mr. Waltham: I think youll like it, it has two out of the three tenors.
Ross: Yeah, ever since you uh, told me that story about that bike I-I couldnt stop thinking about it. I mean, everyone should have a-a first bike, so
Joey: Dont start doing that. You cant do that Rach, cause then youre gonna make me do that. (Starts to cry.) Oh, here we go! (Sits down next to her.)
Joey: You know what? You are my friends, I wanna be supportive, I will come with you. SHOTGUN!
Rachel: You really think so?
Rachel: Oh thank you! (Wiping her nose.) Oh God! (She throws it out.) Can I have another one?
Rachel: Yeah. Yeah, I-I-I see the scare. Listen, Paul, I think this is really great that-that yknow, you shared your feelings. Its really, its beautiful, but umm, what do you say we go share some food?
Joey: Anyway, I started working on what Im going to say for the ceremony, do you wanna hear it?
Chandler: Y'know, of all my friends, no-one knows the crap I go through with my mom more than you.
Joey: That's how they do pants! First they go up one side, they move it over, then they go up the other side, they move it back, and then they do the rear. (Chandler and Ross stare at him) What? Ross, Ross, would you tell him? Isn't that how they measure pants?
Dr. Long: Ill be back in an hour to check you again.
Phoebe: No. No! It's just y'know first, I wanna take off all my clothes and have you rub lotion on me.
Chandler: Yknow what? Theres some nice guys at my office, do you want me to set you up?
Rachel: Um, ok, uh, oh god, um, when you and uh Ross first started going out, it was really hard for me, um, for many reasons, which I'm not gonna bore you with now, but um, I just, I see how happy he is, you know, and how good you guys are together, and um, Monica's always saying how nice you are, and god I hate it when she's right.
Ross: Hotel? Why isn't she staying with you guys?
Ross: What are you guys doing?
Monica: Oh, no. He doesn't have time for that. But if you want, you can go help him and Joey pack up the guest room.
ROSS: Wha, OK, now how do you know that?
Rachel: Am I going to let you watch me undress?
Joey: You guys hear a ringing?
Rachel (crying): Hi you guys!
Everybody: Hey Rach, hey you.
Phoebe: (gasps) Oh, you so would! Oh, you should get that anyway. (They both look at her.) Like for clubbing.
Monica: Come here, I'll make you a drink.
Phoebe (to Rachel): You doing ok?
Phoebe: Um, yeah sure. Why you wanna call your Mom?
ESTL: Oh, I see. Well, I'm just gonna put in a call here and we'll find out what's goin' on and straighten it out. [picks up the phone] Yeah, hi, Lori please. [pause] Hi darling. So how 'bout Joey Tribbiani for the part of the cab driver, isn't he terrific? [pause] Uh-huuuuh. [pause] Uh-huuuuh. OK, doll. Talk to you later. [hangs up] [to Joey] Yeah, you're gonna have to sleep with her.
Hoshi: You are iron. You are steel! Let me ask you something, how come when I call your computer support line, I have to wait an hour and a half?
Chandler: Thats our phone number. Now look, I know I kinda sprung this whole me moving out on thing, so why dont I justwhy dont I just cover you for a while?
Phoebe: Joey, this is Mary Ellen Jenkins. So, Mike, how do you and Joey know each other anyway?
Rachel: I love you Phoebe.
Phoebe: Whoa!! He is soo unreasonable! God, although I think I understand what he means. Oh my God, this is like 60 Minutes, okay, when, when, at first youre really mad at that pharmaceutical company for making the drug and then y'know you just feel bad for the people because they needed to make their hair grow.
PHOEBE: I just think that this was a really bad sign, ya know. I mean, like the beast at the threshold, you know. It's just like, I have no family left, ya know. I mean except for my grandmother, you know, but let's face it, she's not gonna be around forever, despite what she says. And I have a sister who I've barely spoken to since we like shared a womb. I don't know, this is my real father and I just, I want things to be like just right.
Ross: Forget it. I-IYknow what? Ill just have the conversation. Ill just say I like things the way they are, and hope for the best. What do you think Rach?
RICHARD: Oh, yeah, I don't like you this way. All right, I'll see you guys later.
Monica: What are you talking about? These aren't mine.
Phoebe: Hello. Oh good. Ross could you put up some of these flyers for me? (He smiles at her.) OH!! Demon!! Demon!!
Ross: Ohh, you can see them, huh?
Ross: Are you kidding? Oh my God...
Monica: Chandler? Can you give me a hand? (Grabs her jacket)
Rachel: Yeah, I didnt want you to get hit by the boom!
Mona: Umm, I-I thought we were moving forward and now youre-youre sending me all these mixed signals. What are you trying to tell me?
Rachel: Okay, okay. Umm, well ah, maybe he, maybe he feels awkward because you are my boss.
Rachel: Pheebs, you go with Monica and try on her green dress. If that doesn't work, you can wear my gray silk one. Oh, gosh, what am I wearing?!
Ross: Oh sweetie, when do you think youre going to get off tonight?
Mrs. Geller: Chandler! Youve been Rosss best friend all these years, stuck by him during the drug problems. (Ross gets disgusted.) And now youve taken on Monica as well. Well, I dont know what to say. Youre a wonderful human being.
Rachel: Me? Im great! Im fine! Im sooo good!! But, you know whos not great?! Men! Youre a man right Ross?!
Janices Voice: (singing) My funny valentine, sweet comic valentine! You make me high over my heart!
Monica: Uh, where do you think you're going?
Monica: We're moving in a couple of days and we've got a lot of packing to do. It would be great if you guys could pitch in.
Monica: You did? How?
Ross: Yeah, you too. Man, so-so what are you up to?
Joey: All right! You can have the chair.
Monica: Erica, are you okay?
Rachel: Oh my god Chandler! If you can't handle this, what are you going to be like in the hospital? With the blood and the screaming and the little present that's shooting out of her!?
Erica: (in pain) Ooh! Are you sure?
Ross: You keep, you keep... You can't...
Monica: Erica, are you okay?