words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. Chandler and Monica are looking through some papers.]
Chandler: Because we don't do that. We are Bings! And if there's one thing my father taught me was... well to always knock before going into the pool house... but the other thing was never borrow money.
Monica: Anyway erm, are you going to get a handyman to install this stuff?
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross, Chandler and Monica are sitting on the couch. Phoebe and Mike enters.]
Mike: Phoebe and I are moving in together.
Ross: I can't believe you guys are moving in together. That's, that's great! I mean...I'm happy for you guys..
Mike: What are you talking about?
Chandler: And that would have made the official party line. (Joey nods) Monica and I are having a little financial trouble.
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. Phoebe and Mike are packing stuff.]
Mike: I'm sorry. Are you ok with that? Cause if not...maybe us moving in together isn't the best idea.
Rachel: Yeah! If you don't I will! Of course your body's gonna change. Your breasts are gonna get bigger, your ass is gonna get bigger, you're gonna lose bladder control. (she starts sobbing) God! It's just such a magical time!
Ross: wow, are you still going to move in with him?
Ross: Yeah see? And you are so excited about moving in together before, and you know what? You should be. It's a big deal!
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. Chandler enters. Rachel and monica are seated at the table.]
Chandler: Honey I... I love your breasts the way they are!
Monica: Well, my breasts are going to get bigger weather you like it or not! And you know what? It's not just my breasts. My ass is going to get bigger too.
Rachel: Oh my god Chandler! If you can't handle this, what are you going to be like in the hospital? With the blood and the screaming and the little present that's shooting out of her!?
Joey: OK so I'm out four thousand dollars and nobody's boobs are getting any bigger?
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. Ross is helping with the packing, Phoebe and Mike are also there.]
Phoebe: They are awfully boxy...
(Chandler, Monica, Joey and Rachel are carrying a couch through the door)
Chandler: Well! We er..climbed up four flights of stairs, manueveored a narrow hallway, dodged a rabid pitbul... but these last three feet are where it gets really tricky.
Phoebe: Are you gonna change yours?
[Scene: Dr. Longs Office, Ross and Rachel are waiting for the doctor. Ross is drumming his fingers on the bed.]
Rachel: Hi Dr. Long, how are you?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Ross. Joey, and Rachel are eating breakfast. Chandler is holding a bottle of Herseys Syrup.]
Dr. Long: Actually, theyre things you can do. Just some home remedies, but in my experience Ive found that some of them are quite effective.
Rachel: Well, we are ready to try anything.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Rachel are there as Phoebe and Monica enter.]
(There are scratching and squeaking noises coming from the living room, and Joey wakes up, terrified. He pulls his blanket higher. The doorknob is turning.)
Rachel: Oh come on Ross, why are we wasting our time with this other stuff?! We know whats gonna work! Its doctor recommended!
Phoebe looks down: You are a terrific actor.
Monica: How are you doing?
Nurse: Im sorry. Semi-private rooms are all we have.
Rachel: How are you?
Julie: Yeah, we are going to share every moment of this with you. And I think were gonna have some fun.
Monica: What?! Are you kidding me?! You-you-you think were ready to have a baby now?!
Joey: (voice all high and weird) What?! Are you crazy?!
(Joey says nothing, but enters the room and kisses her. They are kissing passionately only to stop for a brief "oh" from Rachel. They continue their passionate kiss and Joey closes the door with his foot and it shuts in the camera's "face". And that's the end of the ninth season.)
Ross: Are you kidding? Look, were not gonna be together just because were having a baby. Okay?
Ross: Wow! Sorry. So uh, how are the new people?
Evil Bitch: Are you looking at her?!
Monica: What is going on with you? Since when are you so crazy about babies?
Monica: We are pretty good.
Monica: So were gonna try? I mean, are we trying?
[Scene: Another Waiting Room, Phoebe and Joey are trying to find out where the guy with the broken leg is.]
Joey: Okay. And uh, are you married.
Cliff: Are all the questions this personal?
Joey: Well, I'm sorry if I'm not a middle-aged black woman! (Starts for his room.) And I'm also sorry if sometimes I go to the wrong audition! Okay, look, if I have to pretend I don't know about you two, then you two are gonna have to pretend there's nothing to know about.
[Scene: The Semi-Private Labor Room, Chandler and Monica are entering to see if they in fact did hear Janice.]
Monica: I cant believe this is taking so long. How are you doing?
Rachel: Are you okay?
Ross: Well then wed be in a lot of trouble, you dont know where any countries are. (Rachel glares at him.) Okay. (He goes over to the desk followed by Rachel.) Uh, say would you umm Would you mind checking again to see if any umm, private rooms may have (Handing her some money) opened up?
Rachel: Well what are we going to do?
Ross: Ugh, easy for you to say, you already know what your kids names are going to be.
Rachel: Well tell us! What are they?
Ross: Oh, Im actually on my way to tell her right now. Yeah, shes been away all week visiting her parents, but shell be cool. I mean, shes been so supportive. She-she even got the baby a tiny T-shirt that says, Fossils are my friends.
Janice: I hate to be the one to say it, but honey you two (Her and Emma) are on your own.
Phoebe: Im sorry, for the last time, why arent you two together again? (Silence from Ross.) No, I know. I know, because youre not in that place. Which would be fine, except you totally are.
Ross: Oh what are you kidding? Shes gorgeous, its all Rachel.
Joey: What are you talking about alone? What about Ross?
Joey: Hey, listen to me, listen to me you are never ever gonna be alone. Okay? I promise thats not gonna happen.
Chandler: Okay, here is the thing. We have thrown a very formal surprise party for you in there! All of your friends are in there and your parents!
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are trying the home remedies again.]
Phoebe: To see if know what these guys are talking about.
Rachel: No! You gotta get me out of here Phoebe! These bargain shoppers are crazy!
Chandler: As we all are at some point during the day.
Mrs. Geller: Can we talk to you for just a yknow Its just a little thing. Well we think its absolutely marvelous that youre having this baby out of wedlock, some of our friends are less open-minded. Which is why weve told them all that youre married.
Phoebe: Are you kidding? Im like the one who talked him into it. I like to think of myself as the puppet master of the group.
Phoebe: Are you all right?
Ross: I wanna go talk to Rachel for a minute, are you gonna be okay alone for a bit?
Mr. Geller: Are you kidding me, I could stay and look at her forever.
Phoebe: Why?! You two are so meant to be together, everybody thinks so.
Mr. Geller: I think there are people in there having sex.
Ross: Dad, what are you doing?
(Ross and Rachel are, needless to say, stunned at the arrival of Janice.)
Joey: (To God) Are you kidding me?!
Rachel: Oh look, shes pulling away again! Do you think my nipples are too big for her mouth? (Joey gets embarrassed.) She looks scared. Doesnt she look scared?
Phoebe: No! No, that you and Rachel are engaged!
Phoebe: Are you lying? Is this like that time you tried to convince us that you were a doctor?
Phoebe: Perhaps because you gave her an engagement ring? Yknow Ross doctors are supposed to be smart.
[Scene: The Janitors Closet, Chandler and Monica are trying to figure out what to do now.]
Monica: What?! Are you crazy? You just had Rosss baby! Its-its so inappropriate. No, its worse than that. Its wrong. Its It is bigger than mine! (Rachels engagement ring.)
Rachel: We really are.
Monica: Ok, I dont wanna be negative so Ill say that most of the signs you bought are good.
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Monica, Phoebe, Joey and Chandler are waiting for Ross and Rachel to come home and Monica is looking at the sign Phoebe bought that says, "Its a Boy!"]
[Scene: The Airport, Carol and Ross are waiting for Emily and Susan to deplane. A gorgeous woman walks by and they both turn to watch her go.]
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, Phoebe, Monica, Ross, and Rachel are watching Emma sleep.]
Ms. McKenna: Are you on board?
[Scene: A restaurant, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Gary are on a double date. Chandler is yawning.]
Monica: Are you trying to tell me that were moving to Oklahoma, or that youre gay? All right, not that this matters, but did they at least offer you a huge raise?
Chandler: No, no, but they are going to lease us a Ford Focus. (Monicas not impressed.) Ill get out of it.
Ross: I dont think that we are.
Joey: Come on, you guys are more then that! I mean, youre gonna get together right?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey and Ross are sitting at one of the high tables.]
Ross: (disinterested) Hey-yeah. (He hurries up to the counter.) Hey Gunther, can I have a scone please? (To the gang.) Wanna hear some good news? Someone I know is getting married! Yeah! And weddings are happy occasions! Oh, by-the-by it's my ex-wife Emily!
Joey: I can't believe you guys are moving.
Joey: Here you are (Hands Rachel a cup of coffee)
Chandler: I'm sorry, are you just used to saying that?
Rachel: It's impossible to find a good doctor. I mean, how do you know the good ones from the ones who are gonna push their penis against your knee?
Rachel: Because (laughs), because, I just heard it. I heard it, and it's ridiculous! I mean, you're married. You're-you're married and it's just ridiculous, and it's like, it's like when said it, I sort of like, I floated up out of my body, y'know? And, and-and then I heard myself say it and then the floating Rachel (laughs) was like, "You are such an idiot!"
Phoebe: Wow, you guys go way back then. So what are you up to these days?
Monica: What are you doing?
Phoebe: Yeah, Ive discovered that Ross forgot to take his brain medicine, uh, now without it, uh, in the brain of Ross, uh womens names are interchangeable, through-through no fault of his own.
Phoebe: Who are you kidding? (To Joey) You just find some guy off the street for me? Oh God! This is humiliating!
Monica: Are you serious? You still see Dr. Gettleman?
Phoebe: You are really good! I play a little guitar myself.
Sally: Hi, I'm Sally. So, no ring. Can I assume you are also a single parent?
Sally: It's hard isn't it? There's almost no time for a social life. I mean, where are you gonna meet someone?
Phoebe: yea you know you are a bit of a drama queen.
Ross: I know and yet here you are all ready for the next date.
Mike: Hey, so are you sure your ready to go.
Mike: Sure (looks confused) who are you?
Rachel: well watching sharks? Are you sure that's what he was doing?
Rachel: Oh, no problem. You can borrow it, by the way. (Puts her hand in the pocket) Here are your keys, hon. (She takes the keys out, sets them on the counter, and notices she also grabbed a receipt.)
Monica:: Eww are you talking about my bother.
Monica:: you don't think sharks are sexy do you?
[Pete enters with his entourage all pumped up, and Ross and Monica are the only ones who stand up and cheer.]
Ross: oh boy you got mad at that part. I went over there to tell him how great you are but you know me BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, and I ended up telling him that.
Mike: (Ross opens the door) You know I'm trying to think of the last time I opened a door and you weren't there, Phoebe are you ok? (She has her hands over her mouth)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Ross is still doing his list. Rachel and Joey are feeding the dog as the phone rings.]
Monica: What are you talking about? We�re all together right now.
Ken: That�s right. Is it true, that the reason you are here in Tulsa is that you fell asleep in a meeting and took the job without realizing what you were saying yes to?