words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, back to the present day.]
Chandler: I am so sorry. I really am. I was an idiot back then. I rushed the stage at a Wham concert for crying out loud!
(She opens the door to reveal Chandler and Ross. Unfortunately, they seem to have their holidays mixed up. They think it's Halloween and they're going as Crockett and Tubbs from that legendary TV show of the late 80's, Miami Vice. God, we looked silly back then!)
Rachel: (entering) Oh-ho, my God! That was so awesome! You totally got him back for calling you fat! He was just drooling all over you. That must've felt so great!
Monica: Yeah, I mean yeah, I look great. Yeah, I feel great and yeah, my heart is not in trouble anymore! Blah, blah, blah! Y'know I still don't feel like I got him back, y'know? I just want to humiliate him. I wanna, I want him to be like naked and then I'm going to point at him and laugh!
Rachel: Then, you will definitely get him back!
Monica: God, I'm sorry! I'll go back and get it!
Chandler: Yeah, well, sorry doesnt bring back the little piggy that cried all the way home! I hate this stupid day! And everything about it! I'll see you later.
(Joey walks in and sees Monica. He freaks out and runs back into the hallway, screaming.)
Chandler: Look, uh, just come later, we'll get everything squared away and you can come back later.
Monica: Oh my God, Richard. (Yep, Richards back.)
Chandler: Yeah, Ill sit down. (He slides back into his chair.)
Monica: YeahOh thats right. You, you always wanted me too. Hey, I see you got your mustache back.
Kristen: Oh okay. But yknow what? Be careful. Because a guy was helping me before had to leave because he hurt his back.
Joey: Oh my God, youre back!
Ross: Okay, well here we are. Now were in a tough spot again, Rach. What do you want to do? How do you want to handle it? Huh? Do you wanna fight for us? Or, do you wanna bail? (sits down next to her) Look, I, (on the verge of tears) I did a terrible, stupid, stupid thing. Okay? And Im sorry, I wish I could take it back, but I cant. (We see Monica and Phoebe are almost in tears.) I just cant see us throwing away something we know is so damn good. Rachel, I love you so much.
Joey: (all excited) The Mr. Bowmonts here!!! (Jumps over the back off the couch and runs out into the street.)
Monica: Oh God (Starts looking around.) Why dont they put chairs back here?!
Monica: Yknow youre really not supposed to be back here!
Monica: Ohh Oh, thats okay I hate when people come back to complement the chef. Like I have nothing better to do! So whats up?
Chandler: Well, she walked in when I was looking at the ring brochures. You can understand that, right? (Ross and Joey look at each other and go back to watching the game on TV.) Guys? Guys? (Walks in front of them again.)
Monica: Fair? Please dont even talk to me about fair! Fair wouldve been you wanting to marry me back then! Or fair wouldve been Chandler wanting to marry me now! Believe me, nothing about this is fair! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing!
Phoebe: Okay, this kind of back talk is not gonna fly when were married!
(Chandler gets up and runs out, but as soon as the door closes behind him he opens it, runs back in, picks up his ring Richard is holding up for him, and runs back out.)
(Ross starts to play. He plays a key that has a back beat sound attached to it. Over the background music he plays the sound of a barking dog, a mooing cow, a laser beam, someone coughing, a jackhammer, a doorbell, a police siren, a ray gun, breaking dishes, and for a closer he plays the sound of a loud crash. Basically, the music sucks.)
[Cut back inside.]
[Cut back inside.]
(They all leave and Joey comes back in quickly.)
Rachel: Yknow, bonus night. Yknow, when two people break up but they get back together for just one night.
Monica: No its not! No! No! Now its about you and Ross getting back together!
Phoebe: (coming back out) Hey! Rachel! Come on!!!!
Chandler: Really? He does? (taking the phone) Hey, buddy, what's up! Oh, she told you about that, huh. Well, yeah, I have one now and then. Well, yeah, now. Well, it's not that big- ..well, that's true,.. Gee, y'know, no-one- no-one's ever put it like that before. Well, okay, thanks! (He hands the phone back and stubs out his cigarette.)
Chandler: Okay. (Goes back to bed.)
Ross: Okay umm, why dont we all take a seat, yknow? And uh, and Ill get us all some uh some coffees(He goes to pull out Elizabeths chair, but Paul steps in)Yeah, why dont you. (Paul pulls out her chair) Uh and you guys can talk about whatever, whatever you want. Yknow? Whatever pops into your head. (He turns his back to Paul and Elizabeth and points to himself for Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe. Then he goes to order the coffee.)
(She comes back out.)
Woman: Great! (Calls down the hall) Dad! (Her old father walks in.) Thank you so much, Ill be back to pick him up in an hour. (She walks away.)
Phoebe: Well, hes never coming back! Okay? You just cost me eight dollars a week!
Ross: The big deal is I dont want naked, greasy strangers in my apartment when I want to kick back with a puzzlebeer! Cold beer.
Phoebe: (reading the recipe on the back of the bag) Yes!! (Realizes.) Ohh.
Phoebe: What? You mean behind my back?
Joey: Well, since you ask. They want me back on Days of Our Lives!
Phoebe: You guys kissed!!!!! What does this mean?!! Are you, are you getting back together?! Can I sing at your wedding?
Rachel: (grabbing Phoebe) Okay. Well be right back. (They go into her office and she closes the door.)
Joey: (jumping up and removing the bandages) Im back baby! Ha-ha-ha!
Rachel: Oh, I gotta get back to work.
Roy: All right, somebody show me where to plug in my box, and we'll get this party started! (he thrusts his pelvis towards Phoebe) Whaaaa... (walks back to plug in his cd player) Here? All right.
Ross: I could put uh-uh a basketball court in the back.
Rachel: Oh yeah. All right, back to work.
Ross: All right! I want my key back!
Phoebe: You dont have to be back for a half-hour!
Rachel: Ohhhhhhhh God. (climbs off his back)
Joey: One! (Pause.) No ten! You said ten! You cant take that back!
Phoebe: (gets up and starts to leave) We want the last six years back!!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Monica has just gotten back from brunch and is telling Chandler about it.]
Chandler: Well, cause she came back the third summer and shed gotten really fa-aa-aw-ow
Joey: Okay, the next situation is for Rachel. The wedding is about to start you walk into the back room and you find Monica taking a nap with Ross. (Ross lies on the floor.) Ill be Monica. Go! (He jumps down and cuddles up with Ross.)
Ross: Just uh, brought back your videos.
Joey: Hey little buddy, how are you feeling? (The duck does not get sick and Joey recoils in horror and heads for the couch.) What the hell is in that face cream? (Hes about to try out the couch but notices the bed in Rachels room. He walks into her room and feels the bed.) Thats so soft. (He pulls back the comforter.) Pillowcases! (He climbs in and groans in delight. Suddenly, he feels something under him and pulls out a little beat up paperback book. He opens it and starts to read from it.) (In his head.) Zelda looked at the chimney sweep. Her father, the vicar (Stops reading and thinks.) The vicar? (Continues reading) wouldnt be home for hours. Her loins were burning. She threw caution to the wind and reached out and grabbed his (Out loud.) Whoa! (Reads on in silence.) Whoa-ho-ho-ho! This is a dirty book! (Continues to read.)
Joey: And shes back in the game.
Chandler: You were not supposed to hear that! I said that behind you back!
Dr. Miller: Okay then, I guess we'll see you back here in three months.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey is coming back from work to find Phoebe, Rachel, and someone else with her back turned is there.]
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, Monica is cooking as a waitress enters carrying a plate of food that has been sent back.]
Monica: She sent the chicken back again?!
The Waitress: She says its to dry now and she wants to come back here and explain to you exactly how she wants it.
Joey: Now hold on a second, fifth floor against that back wall?
Phoebe: Then change it back!
Rachel: Well hello! So, when are we gettin back out on the water matey?
Joey: You shut up! (To Phoebe and Rachel) I love arguing with her. (To Erin) Ill be right back.
Joey: (coming back out) Finally!
(Ross keeps giggling and Rachel decides upon revenge. She gets up and kisses the rather large man in the seat in front of Ross on the back of his head. The guy turns around angrily.)
Joey: Oh No-no-no-no-no-no-no! He went over to Ross' to bring the dog back here!
Tag: I can't believe this! (He walks back in again)
Chandler: How did you know? (Heads back into the bathroom)
Ross: Hey! What's she doing back here?
Tag: What did Joey say? I like you back?
Joey: (through the window) All right, he likes you back! Huh? Told ya, you should go for it!
Monica: Okay Phoebe, we should probably go back now.
Monica: Oh my god! Did you hear that? She said Monica! (She goes back to Clunkers again) Oooh, I can't leave her!
Phoebe: You know if you want, we can sneak the dog back in and Chandler wouldn't even know.
Joey: So? Bring the dog back, you're a hero.
Phoebe: Okay, but you cannot tell him... but look whose back!
Phoebe's Assistant: We've got a couple changes in your schedule. Your 4:00 herbal massage has been pushed back to 4:30 and Miss Somerfield canceled her 5:30 shiatsu.
Ross: Ah, what good are you. (Walks back to his map dejectedly.)
Joey: This is impossible Monica, why dont you just pick all 15? (Hands back the paper.)
Phoebe: All right. We're gonna take Clunkers to Rosss. We'll be back in a minute. (Gets up with Monica to do so.)
Monica: That was that girl Megan! She booked the Swing Kings on the day of our wedding and said that I couldnt have them back unless I gave her the dress!
Rachel: Ugh, I just gotta get the thing back!
Phoebe: We have good news, look whose back!
Ross: All right, yknow what? If you are not going to learn how to ride this bike then Im sorry, Im just gonna have to take it back.
Chandler: Okay. (Walks back to Monica)
[Ross turns around and walks back to Ben.]
Monica: That's right, she came back all by herself.
Rachel: Now, now the one in the feather boa, that's Dr. Francis. Now, she used to be a man. Okay, now look, see, there's Raven. We hate her. We're glad she's dying. Okay- (Marcel pushes down a cushion to reveal a shoe) Wh- wh- Marcel, are you playing with Monica's shoes? You know you're not supposed to pl- whoah. Marcel, did you poo in the shoe? (Takes the shoe into the kitchen) Marcel, bad monkey! Oh! Oh! (She notices the newsletter and taps the contents of the shoes onto it, then folds it shut) Sorry, Barry. Little engagement gift. I'm sure you didn't register for that. (She leaves the apartment holding the newsletter at arm's length. However, she leaves the door open. Marcel runs out in the opposite direction. There is a shot from the TV and Rachel runs back in) Who died? Who died? Roll him over! Oh, c'mon, roll him over! Oh...! Well, we know it wasn't Dexter, right Marcel? Because- (Looks down and notices he is missing) Marcel? Marc- (Notices the open door)
Tag: Id better get back to my desk.
Chandler: Fine, I'll give the suit back.
Phoebe: Well, I guess well just have to put the wall back up.
Phoebe: Oh no! (She runs to see.) (Running back, excitedly) Oh! Wow!!!
Monica: No! Really! Any time Ross makes a toast everyone cries, and hugs him, and pats him on the back and they all come up to me and say, "God, your brother." Know what theyll say this year? "God, you"
Ross: Oh Donald that-that would be great. I am totally ready to come back to work. IWhat? (He notices something through the window.) No! Wh What are you doing?!! (Dr. Ledbetter is slowly backing away.) GET OFF MY SISTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Joey: The RossIs that back?!! (Chandler motions no.)
(Ross mouths to Chandler, "Thank you," and he mouths, "Youre welcome," back.)
Joey: (yelling from the bedroom) Is it back in the cage?
Rachel: Its back in cage!
Rachel: So just bring it back downstairs, whats the problem?
Chandler: By then, the cheesecake may have gone bad. We dont want her to come back to bad cheesecake.
(Chandler throws the back of Rosita into his apartment and quickly starts pushing the base into his apartment.)
Joey: (annoyed) I dont know! (Goes back to looking through the pipe.) (Pause) Yeah, I do.
Chandler: Okay, I went over to Ross' apartment to bring back Clunkers. Yknow, for you, and (Clears his throat) I left the door open and she must have gotten out and I looked everywhere, all over the apartment, including the roof, which FYI Ross, one of your neighbors, growing weed. I couldn't find him, and I am so, so, so, sorry. But I do know where we could all go ease the pain. (Points up and then over to the street)