words in movies
Rachel: (laughs) Well okayWell dont ruin it! Just play along at least!
Joey: I dont know! Its not like its porn! This is a serious, legitimate movie. Yknow? And the nudity is really important to the story.
Phoebe: I dont know. (Timidly) A cowboy theme?
(Cassie enters from the guest room, with her hair up. The extremely beautiful and sexy Denise Richards is playing Cassie. Woo hoo! For those of you who dont know who she is, rent Wild Things and she was also the last Bond girl in The World Is Not Enough.)
Joey: I dont know! I really want this part! And they tell you no matter what you get asked at an audition you say yes. Like if-if they want you to ride a horse, you tell em you can! And just figure out how to do it later.
Rachel: Okay. Okay. All right, you take care of that. And meanwhile, the party is tomorrow and we still dont have a guest list.
Rachel: Well, I dont know. I called all the people in Monicas phone book and these are the only ones who could show up on 24 hours notice.
Phoebe and Rachel: (to each other) I dont know.
Monica: I also, did a little something in fur. But umm, thats really just for me. (Rubs it against her cheek.) Okay. So, why dont you go into your room and try these on and well seeget a better idea of whats gonna work.
Rachel: Yeah, we wanted to throw you a big surprise and a great shower, and now you dont have either.
Monica: Well now, I get to spend my shower with the only people I really love! I mean, I get all those presents (Motions to the pile in the corner) without having to talk to people I dont even like!
Joey: Oh! Hey right! Not a problem. (He starts taking off his clothes.) I totally understand. You need to yknow make sure I dont have any horrible scars or tattoos. Dont you worry; I have nothing to hide. (He drops his pants and stands back up and looks down.) So there you go, thats me. (We cut to a camera angle looking at the casting director and movie director through Joeys legs.) One hundred percent natural! (Suddenly, theres a thud as something falls off.) (Everyone is shocked.) I tell ya, that has never happened before.
Mrs. Geller: (entering) (to Monica) Honey, dont bite your nails.
[Cut to Monica's bedroom, theyre all eating the wax, Chandler and Phoebe, dont like it. Joey tries some and makes a face like: Hey, thats not so bad.]
Phoebe: I dont get it.
Mrs. Geller: Oh no, dont be silly. I just bet Id need these. (Opens the freezer to reveal )
Chandler: Oh-ho-ho, I dont think so!
Ross: I dont know whether hes testing me, or just acting out, but my monkey is out of control. But, he keeps erasing the messages on my machine, "supposedly" by accident.
Chandler: And you dont think taking care of our chick is work?
Joanna: Rachel, I need the Versachi invoice. (to Chandler) Hello! You dont work for me.
The Salesman: You dont have, anything?
Chandler: You dont have it.
Phoebe: Hello, tiny embryos. Well, Im-Im Phoebe Buffay, hi! Im-Im-Im hoping to be your uterus for the next nine months. You should know, that were doing this for Frank and Alice, who you know, youve been there! Umm, yknow they want you so much, so when you guys get in there, really grab on. Okay, and-and I promise that Ill keep you safe and warm until youre ready to have them take you home, so Oh! And also, umm next time you see me, Im screaming, dont worry, thats whats supposed to happen.
Ross: Im sorry, I dont believe contestants are allowed to talk to each other.
Ross: Look, I dont feel like dancing, I feel like having a drink. Okay?
Chandler: You dont turn and slide, you throw it out! Im tired of having to get a tetanus shot every time I get dressed!
Mr. Treeger:: Oh yeah, of course you dont!
Rachel: Im sorry. I didntI dont come in here a lot.
Ross: So why dont you quit?
Chandler: Thats our phone number. Now look, I know I kinda sprung this whole me moving out on thing, so why dont I justwhy dont I just cover you for a while?
Rachel: Well then how come youre still at a job that you hate, I mean why dont you quit and get the fear?
Phoebe: Oh please, somebody tell me I dont have to go to work today!
Monica: Okay ah, please dont freak out. Umm, but ah, theres a blue fingernail in one of the quiche cups, and theres no way to know which one.
Chandler: Why dont you just give him to somebody else?
Phoebe: Oh my God! (Starts reading them.) Dizziness, nervousness, drowsiness, facial swelling, nausea, headacheHeadache. Vomiting, stomach bleeding, liver damage! Now okay, I dont recall any of this coming up when you gave me these little death capsules! Oh Im sorry, extra strength death capsules!
Ross: You dont have to shout everything.
Pete: One meal! Thats all Im asking for. Please? We go out, we eat, and if you dont have a good time, I give you ten grand, we call it even.
Joey: Please dont kick Monica and Rachel out, this wasnt there fault, it was mine.
Pete: Could you leave a note? Cause Im on a lot of pain killers now, and I dont know if Ill remember this tomorrow. (She leaves.)
Chandler and Phoebe: Ill be a fool for you. Im sure, you know I dont mind.
Rachel: Monica, I dont want to lose 200 dollars.
Phoebe: Okay, dont panic. Im gonna go to the store, Im gonna get you another set of nails, no ones gonna know, and youre gonna look great. (She runs over to get her coat.) Oh! Oh, its cause theyre gonna eatthats the problem.
Monica: (starting to cry) Im a good person. And Im a good chef, and I dont deserve to have marinara sauce all over me! Yknow what, if you want me to quit this bad, then all you have to do is
Ross: All right so, Chandler, from now on, dont give your boss a chance to get you. Y'know just ah, dont turn your back to him.
Rachel: Monica, betting the apartment, I dont know about this.
Mr. Treeger:: Yeah, well your friends are in violation of it. Ive been a nice guy up until now, but uh, I dont need this grief. Im gonna call the landlord and tell him that Monica is illegally subletting here grandmothers apartment. Your friends are outta here pal.
Phoebe: Listen Ross, we ran out of gas, and we dont know where we are, so we cant get a tow truck.
Monica: Hey, umm, so listen umm, my friends were telling me a little about this ah, ultimate fighting thing and it, well it sounds really dangerous. I-I dont want you to get hurt, cause I kinda like you.
Richards Date: Oh, thats real pretty. Wait a minute, dont I get to see the bedroom?
Rachel: Ohh Tag, umm youre such a great guy and we have sooo much fun together but I dont-I dont
Chandler: Oh, I dont know.
Chandler: Oh, dont say that! Dont say that. Thats not true. Is it?
Chandler: Yes, but I-I uh, dont have too.
Ross: Well, I was just playing with him, and y'know we were doing the alphabet song, which he used to be really good at, but suddenly hes leaving out e and f. Its like they just ah, I dont know, fell out of his head.
Joey: I dont know! But its the same!
Kathy: I uh, dont really have a preference. You?
Monica: Actually there is. Chandler usually helps me with this, but hes really into the game so I dont want to bother him. Could you help me fold these napkins? (Hands her a stack of them.)
Monica: All right, eight we get married, but 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 9, 10, 11, 12 we dont get married.
Ross: Who gets whom. (They all look at him.) I dont know why I do that.
Ross: Oh, thanks, thanks. So Monica tells me that uh, you dont want to play anymore because me and y'know my talent. Is that true?
Ross: Listen, Joey, I know what he did was wrong but dont you think you could at least hear the guy out?
Joey: Hey! Dont do the crime if you cant do the time.
Monica: Hey, come on, Phoebe, you understand dont you?
Chandler: A Speedo? Uh, I dont have a Speedo. Im gonna go pack my regular long bathing suit. (Goes into the bedroom.)
(As they change places, they give each other the now patented Ross maneuver. If you dont know what that means, click here to find out The One With Joey's New Girlfriend.)
Ross: I dont know what to say, Im sorry. Though, youre not supposed to take these. (Points to the bone) Its like a million years old, we, we actually, we had people looking for that.
Phoebe: And also, we dont know what to do with this. (She turns on a switch and the girls nipples light up.)
Chandler: No-no, I dont think you heard me. Are you ready to party?!
Joey: Look, I know I feel asleep before I could shower and now I dont have time! Theyre just ten blocks away, if I run, I can make it.
Hypnosis Tape: You are falling fast asleep. Deeper. Deeper. Deeper. You are now completely asleep. You dont need to smoke. Cigarettes dont control you. You are a strong, confident woman, who does not need to smoke. A strong, confident woman.
Monica: Hey, they dont pay me a penny a word to make friends.
Joanna: Rachel, please, dont make a scene.
Ross: Its not like we dont know how to party!!
Monica: Its okay, cause y'know what? You dont really need me for the business.
Monica: Im getting married!!!! Im gonna be a bride!!!! (Someone else yells at her.) No, I will not shut up because Im engaged! (He yells again.) Ohh, big talk! Huh, why dont you come over here and say that to me?! Huh, buddy?! Yeah, my fiancee will kick your ass! (Chandler starts to look worried.) Come on, apartment 20! Apartment 20!
Phoebe: Yeah. Thats what you really want. Yeah, I dont want to be the reason youre unhappy, that would just make me unhappy, and I really dont want to be the reason Im unhappy.
Chandler: Why dont you use ours across the hall, cause she has problems.
Joey: Hey, Mon! Im not doing anything, why dont you fire me?
Mike: Hey, Chandler, why dont we talk this over at the Ranger game tomorrow?
Chandler: Well, I dont really know what that is, but lets!!
Rachel: You told this guy that I was looking for a fling?! You dont tell the guy that!
Chandler: Its a big company, I dontif youI
Joey: And I gotta pay rent! Look, how-how about this? You dont fire me, instead I stay here, I gain their trust, and theyll start listening to all the nice things Ive been saying about you.
Phoebe: Theres sooo much you dont know.
Rachel: You dont tell a guy that youre looking for a serious relationship! You dont tell the guy that! Now you scared him away!
Ross: (standing at the edge of the roof) Yeah, I guess we dont have a choice. (Screaming to the street) Help us! Please help us! Were stuck up on the roof and we cant get down!!!
Joey: All right, dont waste it, I mean its still food. (He picks it up and eats it.)
Rachel: Wow! I dont know if I could ever do that. I always figured the first time I had a baby was with somebody I love and that baby would be a keeper.
Kitchen Worker: I dont speak English.
Phoebe: Oh no! No-no! I understand the pain! Dont-dont hurt the puppy.
Phoebe Sr: I really dont think its a very good idea, Phoebe.
Rachel: Well if you go to Disneyland, you dont spend the whole day on the Materhorn.
Rachel: I dont care, Im not going anywhere.
Ross: Dont blame the questions!
(Onstage theres a knock on the door and Kathy opens it. We dont see whats going on, only hear it.)
Chandler: Look, you dont have to draw an actual wowhoa! Shes hot!
Monica: Okay. Im guessing that if you dont want to deliver, you probably dont want to pick stuff up either.
Kathy: Ill tell you what, Chandler, why dont you call me when you grow up!
Joey: I dont know, it smells good.
Phoebe: Yeah, I dont need it.
Monica: No, wait, please dont go! Ive got porn for you too!
Phoebe: Why dont you ask him out?
Rachel: I dont even know how I would go about it.
Joey: No! Forget her, man! You dont need her, you dont need that!
Chandler: Yeah, well, dont expect that to happen anytime soon!
Rachel: Oh well, you dont want to do that now?!
Joey: I-I think everybodys pretending they dont hear you. Anyway, look, I dont know about you and your jackets and your separate tables, but Ross is one of my best friends, and if I save him a seat, Im telling you, he will sit in it! (Ross enters and goes over to the white table) Ross! Ross! Over here, man! I-I saved you seat.
Joey: I dont know, it looks the same.
Monica: Hey, dont mix those up, you could really ruin that lollipop.
Phoebe Sr: I realise I dont have any right to start get all parenty on you and everything now, but umm, (Sees that Phoebe isnt paying attention and is busy mimicking the puppy.) uhh Phoebe, would you please look at me and not the puppy, its very important.
Leslie: Yeah, but, I dont do that anymore. I got kinda sick of it, and then I couldnt come up with anything good, so they fired me.
Monica: I dont know sweetie.