words in movies
[Scene: The Doctors office, Dr. Zane is examining Phoebe as Frank and Alice watch.]
Dr. Zane: It looks like your uterus is ready for implantation.
Dr. Zane: Okay, itll take just a little while to prepare the embryos.
Dr. Zane: Um-hmm, five actually.
Dr. Zane: We do five because that gives you a 25% chance that at least one will attach.
Phoebe: Whoa!! Thatokay, thats a lot of pressure on me and my uterus. (to Dr. Zane) So, well okay, so is thereis maybe is there something that I can do yknow just to like help make sure I get pregnant?
Dr. Zane: No, Im sorry.
Dr. Zane: Ready?
Rachel: (on phone) Daddy... Daddy... Daddy, why whyyy would I sleep with Billy Dreskin? His father tried to put you out of business! (Rachel turns to Monica, clasping the receiver to her bosom so Dr.Green can't hear, while mouthing "You are...") ...dead!
DR. BURKE: No no. Henry's almost two and he's talking and everyting. Here. You know, the other day he told me he liked me better than his other grandpa. Now in all fairness his other grandpa's a drunk but still. . .
JOEY: [as they're walking out, Dr. Greene questioningly gestures at the Happy Birthday sign over the door] This is clearly in the wrong apartment. [they all walk across the hall]
Joey: Dr. Drake Remoray. Days of Our Lives. Voted most datable neurosurgeon by Teen Beat.
Dr. Green: (interrupting him) I know!! Its a museum! What, youre the only one around here who can make a joke! At least mine was funny. Ah, waiter, we will have two lobsters and a menu. (nods at Ross, and mouths I dont know to the waiter.)
Dr. Long: Ten centimeters, youre about to become a mom.
(Ross with his pants around his ankles tries to run, but Dr. Geller forgets that he has his pants around his ankles and falls down trying to flee.)
Joey: Good evening. Im Mr. Tribbiani. And I will be teaching acting for soap operas. Now um, on my first day as (proudly) Dr. Drake Remoray on Days of Our Lives, (looks for a reaction from his students, and gets none.) I learned that one of the most important things in soap opera acting is reacting, this does not mean acting again, it means, you dont have a line, but someone else just did. And it goes like this. (looks all intense for a moment and then gasps, the students cheer him) Thanks, thanks, a lot. Oh, by the way, before I forget to work in soap operas some of you will have to become much more attractive. All right, moving right along.
Dr. Baldhara: How about a hammer, or a small blade?
DR. BURKE: But they're so dull, they're all opthamologists.
DR. BURKE: Yeah, it sure does. [they hug and it turns into a passionate kiss]
Dr. Long: We are moving along, just slowly. (Rachel lies back and sighs.) Dont worry, youre doing great. Ill be back soon. (Exits.)
[Scene: A Doctor's Office, Ross is having his thing looked at by Dr. Rhodes.]
Dr. Franzblau: So, I understand you're thinking of having a baby? Well, I see you're nine months pregnant. That's a good start. How you doing with your contractions?
(Dr. Geller, the man with the Ph.D. in Paleontology, is trying to find a place to hide, but this supposedly intelligent man in the hands of clich�d scriptwriters runs around with his pants down around his ankles like one of the Three Stooges.)
Dr. Long: Shes fine. Shes experiencing Braxton-Hicks contractions, mild discomfort caused by contractions in the uterine wall.
Rachel: Excuse me, Dr. Bobby happens to be an excellent doctor.
DR. BURKE: No no, it, it's fine, believe me. I do it too. I always answer with the 'I'm OK' head bob. [demonstrates] 'I'm OK.' [tilts head] 'You sure?' [bobs head] 'Yeah, I'm fine.' Hey listen, I've got to set up the music. I got a new CD changer, of course the divorce only left me with 4 CD's to change.
Dr. Oberman: Well, I was just wondering about the mother-to-be, but.. thanks for sharing. (To Carol) Uh, lie back..
Bobby: Hey, Dr. Farber.
Joey: (Snatches the phone) Hey Ma. Listen, I made the appointment with Dr. Bazida, and... Excuse me? (To his dad) Did you know this isn't Ma?
DR. BURKE: Ah, that's OK, come on in. Um, I'm sorry, is Monica Geller coming? I was told she was.
Ross: ..Dr. Oberman. Okay. And is he-
Carol: Dr. Oberman.
Bernice: (over intercom) Dr. Farber, Jason Greenstein's gagging.
[Scene: Rachel and Barrys bedroom, Rachel is watching Days of Our Lives. Of course its a Dr. Drake Remoray scene. Its set in a hospital room, and Dr. Wesley and a nurse are talking about a female patient with a bandage around her head.]
Dr. Roger: Yknow, its funny, but when we were studying communicable diseases
Dr. Oberman: (entering) Knock knock!How are we today? Any nausea?
Ross: I got held up at Dr. Gettleman's office. There was some guy that freaked everybody out.
Dr. Baldhara: Does he, uh, fight with other animals?
[Time lapse, Monica is now wearing the dress while doing the dishes and is making like she is thanking her guests for coming to her wedding. Paging Dr. Crane. Dr. Fraiser Crane!]
Dr. Li: Well, I believe that the answers lie in the osteological evidence. I plan to begin there.
Dr. Baldhara: Even if he were... cornered?
Dr. Mitchell: Hey.
Ross: Oh-oh, youre-youre fellow scholars. What exactly were you looking for, hmm? Perhaps, (Grabs a book from the shelf behind him) perhaps Dr. Chester Stocks musings on the Smiledon Californicus?
Dr. Mitchell: (Smiling) Hi, err Rachel. I'm Dr.Mitchell.
Dr. Rosen: This hummus is great.
Dr. Rosen: Ah here, we brought wine.
Dr. Mitchell: So?
Dr. Mitchell: That's because they are.
Dr. Rosen: (Nervously) okay, but you have to admit that every time we go out... Women we meet at the hospital... It turns into...
Dr. Rosen: Good for you.
Dr. Rosen: Excuse me?
Dr. Mitchell: Really?
Dr. Rosen: So, Monica, how's the ankle?
Dr. Rosen: This is a great place. How long have you lived here?
Dr. Rosen: So... they sss-still seem normal.
Dr. Baldhara: You're making a big mistake here. I mean, San Diego's all well and good, but if you give him to me, I'll start him off against a blind rabbit and give you twenty percent of the gains.
Dr. Mitchell: I'll take a look at him.
Dr. Mitchell: Rachel.
Dr. Harad: Oh, no-no-no, it's a good one! Fonzie plays the bongos. All right, are you ready? It's time to start pushing.
Dr. Franzblau: It really was. There was this great little pastry shop right by my hotel. (Carol sits up in pain, Rachel and Dr. Franzblau casually lay her back down) There you go, dear.
Dr. Rhodes: Wait a minute, hold it. (He goes to the door and opens it.) Johnson! Will you come in here a moment?
[Scene: Ross's new apartment, he is showing his boss, Dr. Ledbetter his new place and new outlook on life.]
JOEY: Hey, I'll be alright. I mean it's not like I'm starting from sqare one. I was Dr. Drake Remoray on Days of Our Lives. Heh? I mean that's gotta have some kind of cache.
[Scene: The Waiting Room, Rachel and Dr. Franzblau have gone to get coffee.]
Nurse: Youve done all you can Dr. Wesley. You have got to let her go.
Dr. Franzblau: Hey, how's my favorite parenting team doing?
Ross: Dr. Franzblau, hi.
Dr. Franzblau: No, it's hard enough to get women to go out with me.
Rachel: (to Dr. Franzblau) Ok, so anyway, you were telling me about Paris, it sounds fascinating.
Dr. Franzblau: It is nice to meet you. I'm Dr. Franzblau. I'm your roommate's... brother's... ex-wife's obstetrician.
Ross: (puts his head near the baby) Hello! (to Dr. Franzblau) Oh, sorry.
Dr. Franzblau: You're doing great, you're doing fine.
Dr. Franzblau: I'm sorry, I can't tell the baby to wait for them.
Dr. Franzblau: I'm gonna go check up on your friend.
Dr. Franzblau: I try not to let my work affect my personal life, but it's hard, when you... do what I do. It's like uh...Well, for instance, what do you do?
Dr. Harad: Just-just to clarify, I'm not Fonzie. (Phoebe nods in agreement as he leaves.)
Dr. Franzblau: All right, Carol, I need you to keep pushing. I need(reaches for an instrument, Rachel's hand is on it) Excuse me, could I have this?
Rachel: And if you need anything else, I(notices the handsome Dr. Franzblau)do not believe we've met. Hi. I'm, uh, Rachel Green. I'm Carol's... ex-husband's... sister's roommate.
Phoebe: Oh, it's Dr. Seuss!
Rachel: No! Shoot, Dr. Schiff what kind of question is that?!
Benjamin: The selection committee has chosen the three of you as our finalists today. The ultimate decision will be based upon the answers you give to the questions I ask here. I'm gonna start with Dr. Li. Dr. Li, you claim the field is too reliant on the Linnaean taxonomic system. How do you propose to correct this problem?
Dr. Miller: Okay. You've got a small, minor infection in that left eye. I want you to take these drops three times a day and you'll be as good as new.
Dr. Mitchell: (on the phone) Monica and Rachel's apartment. Err yeh, aayah, yeh, just one second... (handing it to Monica) ..ah, Rachel, it's your dad.
[Scene: Carol's room, Rachel and Dr. Franzblau are there with her.]
Dr. Miller: This is a glaucoma test.
Dr. Franzblau: No, no, really. I suppose it's because I spend so much time, you know, where I do.
DOCTOR: Hello, there. I'm Dr. Carlin. I see someone's having an allergic reaction.
JOEY: There's my scene, there's my scene. [Joey on tv] "Mrs. Wallace, I'm Dr. Drake Ramoray, your sister's neurosurgeon.
MONICA: Dr. Burke, it, it's me.
Dr. Green: What kind of person is allergic to lobster? I guess the kind of person that works at a library.
ERICA: Well, yes, yes, the best doctor in all of Salem, Dr. Drake Remore.
DR. BURKE: Monica? My God you used to be so. . . I mean you, you, you, you must have lost like. . . You look great.
DR. BURKE: You too.
Dr. Franzblau: Ok, all right, well aren't there times when you come home at the end of the day, and you're just like, 'if I see one more cup of coffee'...
MONICA: Dr. Burke? I don't think so. I mean, like, he's a grown up.
DR. BURKE: See.
DR. BURKE: I'm going to look into your eyes now.
DR. BURKE: So, it's great to see ya.
DR. BURKE: Oh, OK, yeah. I'll see ya later.
DR. BURKE: Drops!
DR. BURKE: Yeah, since the divorce, when anybody asks me how I am, it's always with a sympathetic head tilt. [demonstrating] 'How ya doin'? You OK?'
RACHEL: Ya know, Dr. Burke kissed me once.
DR. BURKE: Oh, well obviously you know Barbara and I split up, otherwise you wouldn't have done the head tilt.
DR. BURKE: Yeah. Are we nuts here?
DR. BURKE: Yep.
DR. BURKE: So.
MRS. GELLER: Well, you kids thank Dr. Burke for the ride?
ERICA: No, no no no, you don't have to tell me anything. You don't have to explain yourself to me. Ooh, who am I to question the great Dr. Drake Remore?