words in movies
Phoebe: I got it for your wedding and I ordered it weeks ago, and it finally got here!
Chandler: Pheebs you didnt have to get us anything for our wedding you already sang
Phoebe: I didnt know where to put it so I just left it here for now.
Monica: Dont feel bad for me! I won like every time!
Rachel: Yeah! Oh, and then afterwards you can take her to the Four Seasons for drinks. Or you go downtown and listen to some jazz. Or dancingOh! Take her dancing!
Rachel: Ooh, I miss dating. Gettin all dressed up and going to a fancy restaurant. Im not gonna be able to do that for so long, and its so much fun! I mean not that sitting at home worrying about giving birth to a sixteen pound baby is not fun.
Monica: No! No-no! I love it! It is a great present! In fact, why dont you go home and wait for the thank you card?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is getting ready for her date with Joey as there is a knock on the door.]
Joey: No, Im picking you up for our date. These are for you. (Hands her some flowers.)
Ross: which brings us back, of course, to Greelys theory of dominance. (The bell rings.) Okay, that-thats all for today. Oh, uh does anyone know where the Freeman building is?
Joey: No! No. Umm, just myself and if they dont like me for(Laughs.) Im sorry I couldnt even get through that.
(Rachel gets up and heads for the rest room.)
Chandler: Well Ive been playing it for like eight hours, itll loosen up. Come on, check out the scores. Oh, and also look at the initials, theyre dirty words.
Chandler: No-no-no, if you unplug it, Ill have nothing to show for my day! It would be like I was at work. (She unplugs it.) No! (And plugs it back in.) Hey look at that! Look at that, its still there! This thing must have some kind of primitive ROM (Read Only Memory, its a memory chip.) Chip in it or something!
Rachel: (laughs) Okay. All right, stand up. (They do so.) Well, when were at the door, I lightly press my lips against his, and then move into his body just for a second, and then I make this sound, "Hmmm." Okay, I know it doesnt sound like anything, but I swear it works.
Joey: (stunned and turned on) Yeah. WhyYeah, that would work for ya
Joey: No-no! Im fine. Its just Hey, can I ask you something? Have you ever looked at someone that youve known for a while and then suddenly suddenly see them a different way?
Joey's Date: Totally! Wow! (Pause) Would you excuse me for a sec?
(At this point a stream of obscenities burst forth from Phoebes mouth just in time for Ben and Ross to enter and hear most of it, and in slow motion Ross tries to shield his innocent son from Phoebes vulgarity.)
Joey: Terrified. (But for a totally different reason.)
Ross: So is everybody here? I got here a little early myself. Let us begin. Now, the hydrosaurids have been unearthed in two main locations. (He moves to the map and we see why he made it to class on time, hes wearing in-line skates and hasnt taken them off.) Here. (Points to the map, somewhere in the Middle East, then spins on the skates and points to the map.) Here. (China.) Now as for the hydrosaurs
Rachel: Ugh! Get out! Get out! Go! Come on! (Ross gets up and heads for the kitchen.) No! Not in there! Hes in there! (She points Ross to the door next to the kitchen.)
Joey: Hey, Gunther. Can you uh, can you cover for me? I just got an audition.
Phoebe-Estelle: It’s a little coincidental, but believable. (Joey nods in agreement). Listen, I’m sure you’re wondering why I didn’t get you an audition for that TV movie.
Mr. Geller: (To Monica) Why dont we take it for a spin?
Chandler: Okay look, don't...don't be mad okay? But after I unpacked the boxes I wanted to do something nice for you, so, I-I-I cleaned the apartment. So I moved everything around and then I forgot where it, where it went back and I'm sorry, I'm very sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
[Scene: The Hallway between the Apartments, Ross is hiding behind that bump out on Monicas side waiting for Phoebe and Rachel. As they come up the stairs, he jumps out and yells ]
Chandler: (frustrated) Okay, for the last time. Its not named for each individual man.
Ross: Hop in. (Phoebe hops in.) Get ready for the smoothest ride of your life.
Phoebe: Wow, that sounds great! And what are you making Monica, in case Rachels dessert is...[about to say bad] so good that I eat all of it. Theres none left for anybody else!
Joey: Yep. (Starts for Monicas room, but Chandler stops him.)
Rachel: Okay, but taking care of a drunk, naked woman seems like a job for Joey.
Phoebe: Oh let me guess, and you wanna have them all at the same time and you wanna have them for your brother.
Rachel: No, so I dont have to get married until Im 33! Thats three years, thats three whole yearsOh, wait a minute though. Ill need a year and a half to plan the wedding, and Id like to know the guy for a year, year and a half before we get engaged Which means I need to meet the guy by the time Im thirty.
Monica: I-I-I wanna thank you all for coming. My family and my friends
Ross: Hey! That was a practical purchase! I needed that car for transportation! Okay? I-I have a child!
Rachel: Oh, if I only want two kids, can I keep him for another year?
Ross: Yeah, I kind of uh, have something else planned for you guys.
CHAN: I'm telling you this thing won't print. Yes, I pressed that button like 100 times. You know, for a hot line you are not so hot. What? What is that in the background? Are you watching Star Trek?
Phoebe: Okay, a meat eater. Fine, thats one for you.
Rachel: Ohh, you can say. Come on, I dont want you to feel like you cant tell me things. (Motions for him to sit down.)
Joey: And Chandler I cant believe I let you pay for this one. (They hug and he whispers in his ear.) Thanks man.
Cecilia: No, he already knows that he owns everything in the room! Hes not finding it out for the first time! So, try it again.
Cecilia: But Well now, nows a different time for me. (Starts to cry.)
(Rachel excitedly jumps up and heads for the door.)
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Wow! How long were we arguing for?
Rachel: (grabbing a beer out of the chairs fridge) I am so psyched I kept this chair for myself!
Ross: Well, these. These are yours right here. (Pointing to the boxes they just created for her.)
Chandler: No, but Horny for Monica Minister called, wanting to know if we were still together.
Monica: Okay, while were waiting for these pills to kick in, Im gonna sit you down on the couch. Come on. (Phoebe gets up and goes with her.) Get some nice soft pillows under your head, Im gonna turn the TV on and you can watch whatever you want. And ImSit down(She sits down on the couch)gonna make you some tea. And then, Im gonna rub your feet.
Chandler: A freakish thin date with a hanger for her head?
Monica: Phoebe, relax none of that stuff ever happens! They just put it on there for legal reasons!
Joey: Anyway, I started working on what Im going to say for the ceremony, do you wanna hear it?
Ross: Hey! Oh listen, I was just clearing some space for your stuff.
Joey: Uh, really good. Really good. Yeah, I should be ready to kill myself any day now. (Chandler returns with a bobby pin and hands it to Joey.) Wow, you sure found that quick. (He tries the pin in the lock.) I justI wish I didnt feel this way about Rachel anymore, yknow? I wish things could go back to normal. I mean, I love living with her and God, helping out with the baby is just amazing, but now I think I think Ross feels left out. Yknow? When I had to take Rachel to the hospital, the doctor thought I was the father. God You shouldve seen the look on Rosss face. (Pause) By the way, I have no idea what Im doing here. For all I know Im just locking it more. Oh hey, did you try opening it with a credit card?
Monica: (entering) Hey guys! Do you wanna look at the song list for the wedding? (They ignore her.) Guys?
Monica: Im sorry. Im sorry. I-I should probably leave you girls alone. (She heads for the bedroom.)
Phoebe: Good for you!
Joey: No! Im up for a Soapie!
Joey: Okay. I got nominated for my part on Days of Our Lives!
Joey: No, no, no! Its real! And it has been since 1998. (Rachel returns from the bathroom.) Hey Rach! Rach! Im up for a Soapie!
Monica: Yeah, you're my husband. I'm not gonna live in a different state than you for 208 days out of the year.
Phoebe: Go for it.
CHANDLER: Oh, yeah, easy for you to say, you don't have to walk around sporting some reject from the Mr. T collection. [Joey walks in behind Chandler]
Joey: What award are you practicing for?
(Chandler and Ross head for opposite ends of the couch.)
Chandler: Easy for you to say; youll be wearing a veil.
Jessica Ashley: No, I try to save that for real awards. Now, if youll excuse me. (She exits.)
Ross: Uh Mr. Morse, can I speak to you for a moment?
Monica: What was it for?
Joey: Uh listen, heres your Soapie. I accepted it for ya. (Hands it to her.)
Chandler: Hey, by any chance did either of pick uh Rachel for your secret Santa, cause I wanna trade for her.
Ross: Yeah, well, this guy at work gave me "Sex for Dummies" as a joke.
Rachel: Hey Pheebs, can I talk to you over here for a second?
Rachel: Were paying for this yknow.
Rachel: Okay. Umm, what should we do for the theme?
Chandler: Yknow I was thinking if we had a a big fight and uh we broke up for a few hours
The Casting Director: Well, the director thinks youre really right for the part and wants to meet you tomorrow.
Phoebe: Well for the regular guy, its bad, but Chandler, Oh dear God!
Joey: I just have to call my agent and tell her I cant do the part. (Gets up for the phone.)
Monica: I guess you can get back to deciding on what to get me for a present! (Runs out.)
Phoebe: Uh-huh, and a little seed money for the party. (Holds up $40.)
Ross: Uh-huh. Yeah I-I have a knack for impressions.
Phoebe: Hmm, yknow theres another word for people like that. Losers!
Rachel: (to the woman) Excuse us for a minute. (They go into the kitchen.) You didnt tell her to come?!
Monica: Well uh, Im trying to make something for Joey. Do you mind if I raid your fridge?
Monica: For what?
Monica: Well no wait a minute thats not true! No, what did, that was really sweet. And it kinda works out for the best.
Cassie: Yeah! Thank you so much for letting me stay here.
Rachel: All right, fine! But I had too! I had to do it for my career!
Rachel: Oh, Ross, relax. It's probably like two dollars for the first contraction, and then fifty cents for each additional contraction.
[Scene: At a writer's desk. The writer is working on a script for Days of Our Lives.]
PHOEBE: Oh good, ok. Oh nooo, I have to go because I'm late for my um, Green Eggs and Ham discussion group. Um tonight it's why he would not eat them on a train. Have fun bye.
Chandler: You mean like for award shows?
Chandler: (looks him in the eye) I'm not breaking up with her! (they stare at each other for a while, then Joey blows in his face)
Rachel: Yeah, why is it so hard for you to believe?!
Ross: And on your anniversary, for shame!
Ross: And what(notices the stenographer is still typing)What are you typing that for? Did you hear what she said? We dont get the annulment. Dont type that! What?! Stop typing! (He goes over to where the stenographer is typing and in the process pushes Rachel out of his way.) Hey! Stop typing! (Hes still typing.) Stop typing! Stop typing!!
Cecilia: So, the essence of the character is rooted in her confidence. So, when Jessica enters a room for instance, she owns everything and every person in that room. (Joey is nodding.) You try.
Monica: Well, he did manage to keep his identity secret for a long time.
Joey: (entering) Hey! Uh, Monica? Chandler? Can I talk to you guys for a second?
Joey: No! No, I-I just wanna thank you guys for what you did for my parents, that was really sweet. Theyre so happy they get to be a part of your special day.
Cecilia: That is a tricky one. Well, Joey I really wanna thank you. Youve, well you made a very difficult time for me a little less painful.
Ross: Believe me, it seems like less because they hid it from us for so long.
(Joey leaves and Monica comes up for air.)
(Joey gives him a thumbs up and heads for the chicken.)
CHANDLER: Hey, just because this woman thinks she can actually see Joey through the magical box in her living room doesn't mean she's not a person. I mean, does she not deserve happiness, does she not deserve love? What're you lookin' at me for? He's the one who wants to boff the maniac.
Joey: Oh, Im sorry, Ross. Ill get it for you right now. And since I made you wait, Ill toss in a free muffin.
Chandler: Well, I guess there's nothing left for us to do but-but kiss.
Joey: Oh yeah, yeah! He's done tons of commercials. I've seen him in like Sugar Smacks, Playstation, and that one for the phone company. In fact he was so good in that one, he actually convinced me to switch phone companies. Chandler was mad .
Phoebe: Well, I'm watching it for some friends who went out of town. Wait. (She bends down, picks up the dog, and waves with one of its paws) Hello, my name is Clunkers. May I please stay with you nice people?
Joey: Okay. Then I guess I have dry eyes and a scratchy throat for no reason.
Chandler: Oh, yeah, easy for you to say, you don't have to walk around sporting some reject from the Mr. T collection. [Joey walks in behind Chandler]
Chandler: (angrily) Well next time ask! Or at least wait for me to ask! (He storms out.)
Phoebe: Good for you! And hey, I thought your paper on punctuated equilibrium in the Devonian era was top notch!
Chandler: Im gettin my chair back! (Heads for Joey and Rachels.)
Phoebe: I think so too. And that little flap? Great for holding my lipstick.
Chandler: No! No! I dont want him to know were yet! Im not sure Im ready for that. And besides hes not gonna be too happy to see me either.
Ross: No Rach! Come on! No-no! Yeah, Im sure we wont get arrested for this.
JOEY: What? You think I'm too dumb to understand that a husband needs to be with his wife?� Huh?� Do you think I'm like, "Duh."� (He strikes himself in the head with the bat.� He stands dazed for a moment.)
Chandler: Believe me, Ive been saying that for years. Oh my God!