words in movies
[Scene: A Theater, the gang is in the audience wating for a play of Joey's to start.]
Chandler: Alright. Once I got on the subway, right, and it was at night, and I rode it all the way to Brooklyn... just for the hell of it.
Monica: Good for you, Joey.
Rachel: Look! I cleaned! I did the windows, I did the floors... I even used all the attachments on the vacuum, except that little round one with the bristles, I don't know what that's for.
Monica: Yeah, yeah, it's interesting.. but y'know what? Just for fun, let's see what it looked like in the old spot. (She moves it.) Alright, just to compare. Let's see. Well, it looks good there too. Let's just leave it there for a while.
Joey: Okay, okay, fine! Make jokes, I don't care! This is a big break for me!
Monica: For what?
Chandler: No, no resentment, believe me, it's worth it. 'Kay? Y'know in a relationship you have these key moments that you know you'll remember for the rest of your life? Well, every- single- second is like that with Aurora.. and I've just wasted about thirty-five of them talking to you people, so, uh.. Monica, can you help me with the door? (He has armloads of stuff.)
[Scene: A Film Set, Joey is entering for his scene.]
Joey: Uh, listen, I just wanna thank you for this great opportunity.
Joey: I was going for quiet desperation. But if you have to ask...
Aurora: (getting up and dressing) I'm sorry. He'll be waiting for me.
Chandler: Well, y'know, most women would kill for three guys like us.
Joey: Y'know, I've done nothing but crappy plays for six years. And I finally get my shot, and I blow it!
Phoebe: No, I don't think this was your shot. I mean, I don't even think you just get one shot. I really believe big things are gonna happen for you, I do! You've gotta just keep thinking about the day that some kid is gonna run up to his friends and go 'I got the part! I got the part! I'm gonna be Joey Tribbiani's ass!'.
Monica: (hums for a while, then gives up, and in her head) If it bothers you that much, just go out and get the shoes. No. Don't do this. This is stupid! I don't have to prove anything, I'm gonna go get them...But then everyone will know. Unless I get them, and then wake up really early and put them back! ...I need help! (She buries her head in her pillow.)
JOEY: Uh, uh, we'll flip for it. Ducks or clowns.
RACHEL: Well, people missed you in there. And in fact, there was actually a request for "Smelly Cat".
CHANDLER: You're welcome. Hey Joey, thanks for parking the car [passes the dollar back].
MONICA: Oh, gosh, this is so weird. I mean, his whole life was in this apartment, and now it's gone. You know, I think it would be nice if we just took a few moments, for Mr. Heckles. I mean, he was kind of a pain, he was, but, he was a person. You're all going to hell.
ROSS: Will you hold Ben for a sec? Come here. Come here.
Rachel: Oh. Well then, you better go take that back because they're gonna charge you for that.
PHOEBE: You name one woman that you broke up with for a real reason.
(Joey lunges for phone and misses.)
Phoebe: (in voice, on phone) 'Okay, go ahead.' (in normal voice on phone) Um, hi Annie. (listens) Fantastic! (to Joey) You got it. (on phone) Oh, okay, um, 'Will he work for scale?' you ask me. Well, I don't know about that, (Joey clears his throat to signify yes) except that I do and he will. Great, oh you are such a sweetheart. I would love to have lunch with you, how about we have lunch next....(hangs up phone) Op, went through a tunnel.
RACH: Hi, I'm sorry, I need to borrow your phone for just one minute.
Chandler: Look, Ross, you gotta understand, between us we haven't had a relationship that has lasted longer than a Mento. You, however have had the love of a woman for four years. Four years of closeness and sharing at the end of which she ripped your heart out, and that is why we don't do it! I don't think that was my point!
RACH: Thank you. OK. [dials] [to Michael] Machine. Just waiting for the beep.
Joey: Oh yeah, thats just a little something for my huge gay fan base. (Winks at him.)
ROSS: You've had feelings for me?
RACH: Ohh, OK, OK, OK, well, basically, lately, I've uh, I've uh, sort of had feelings for you.
RACH: Yeah, what, so? You had feelings for me first.
Phoebe: Oh hey you guys, I couldn�t get a reservation for the night of my birthday, so we have to do dinner Thursday night instead.
RACH: Hey, I was doin' great before I found out about you. You think it's easy for me to see you with Julie?
Flight Attendant: Sir? Sir? Excuse me, sir? Uh... I have a message for you.
Monica: Yeah, tacos! Ever since you told me that story Ive had such a craving for them.
PHOE: Wow. What are you gonna use it for?
MNCA: [reading the paper] There are no jobs. There are no jobs for me.
Monica: Just out. Had some lunch, just me, little quality time with me. Thanks for your jacket.
Phoebe: Look, she only suspects something okay? She doesnt know for sure, so just throw her off the track.
JOEY: Ross, listen. I got two words for you. Threesome.
Ross: Hey. Rachel, I-I-I've been wanting to tell you something for a while now and I really, I just have to get it out.
MNCA: Just waiting for it to stop bubbling.
(Ross exits, a phone rings, and Chandler dives for his phone.)
RACH: Yeah, what're you saying, you just sort of put away feelings or whatever the hell it was you felt for me?
JOEY: Hey, here's a thought, Ross. [reaches for the computer]
Rachel: (as Monica) Yeah, and and, I'm just gonna pay for this with a check.
JOEY: He broke up with Julie. Well, go hug her, for god's sakes.
ROSS: Look, can, can you do something for me?
Rachel: Oh, really, well Ross, you know what? I am a big girl. I don't need someone telling me what is best for me.
RTST: Hi, thanks for coming in again.
JOEY: Oh we flipped for it. I got the cigar, he got the moustache. Figured if we both grew it, we'd look like dorks.
(He goes up on stage, mimes like he's giving the speech, and Chandler takes his picture. However, before he gets down everyone starts clinking their glasses for a real speech.)
Mike: Oh, sorry. (He digs in again and finally finds what he's been looking for. A key.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica is preparing for the party with Ross questioning her.]
CHANDLER: Oh, so that's what this is for.
Chandler: Yes, but this is Pete. Okay? Hes not like other people, on your first date he took you to Rome. For most guys thats like a third or fourth date kinda thing.
Chandler: (to him) Hi! Hi. Okay, there was a slight mix-up at the jewelry store, the ring youre about to propose with was supposed to be held for me. So, Im gonna need to have that back. (The guy isnt sure.) But, in exchange Im willing to trade you this beautiful, more expensive ring. (Looking at the ring.) Ew.
Joey: The thing is cause I live with Rachel Im here for a lot of the stuff, okay? (To Rachel) And Ross Ross is missing everything. So
PHOEBE: Yeah, yeah, no it's OK 'cause, I mean, I know he's there, so, that's enough for now.
JOEY: Rach, these are for you.
Phoebe: No! No, the robots just work for them.
Ross: Well, for one thing, she keeps calling her Ella! Rachel: (Defends Amy) Wha.. well, Ella's a nice name!
Monica: We ripped that couple apart, and kept the pieces for ourselves.
Rachel: So. I just thought the two of us should hang out for a bit. I mean, you know, we've never really talked. I guess you'd know that, being one of the two of us, though, right?
Joey: You guys, this is Shelley, shes interviewing me for Soap Opera Digest, and Shelley, this are my friends
JOEY: I've never slept with someone for a part.
Chandler: No-no-no! It is going to be okay, because Mrs. Braverman is gonna send away for a free one and that way we all win! The only losers are the big cheesecake conglomerate, (Reading the label) Mommas Little Bakery. (Pause) I feel terrible, Im a horrible, horrible, horrible person.
MNCA: Bobby and I are going away for the weekend, remember?
FBOB: This is really hard for me to say.
ROSS: Good for you.
Ross: Alright, I'm gonna go find them... (twitches a bit, looks down) I just need a... need a before I can... you know. (gestures standing up... they sit and wait for a while) Grandma... grandma... grandma... (he tries to concentrate...) Okay, I see you later.
RACHEL: For...me.
MRS GREEN: Well, not just for you.
Joey: Eww! Look, I'm asking a favor here. If I do this for her brother, maybe Angela will come back to me.
Monica: Oh my god, Joey, for all we know this guy could be horribly...
MONICA: Listen, um honey, I appreciate this but you don't have to keep hanging out with them for me, I mean, they have each other.
PHOEBE: Yes, hi, Mr. Adelman. Thanks for meeting me.
CAROL: And then Susan and I got in this big fight because I said maybe we should call off the wedding, and she said we weren't doing it for them, we were doing it for us, and if I couldn't see that, then maybe we should call off the wedding. I don't know what to do.
Chandler: You have every reason to be upset. We did lie. But only because we've been waiting and trying to have a baby for so long. Now we don't know how long it's gonna be before we can get another chance again.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica has made food for Phoebe and Rachel to taste.]
Rachel: Amy, you know what? I was thinking that maybe now it'd be a good time for us to sit down and, you know, talk about your future.
PHOEBE: Oh, I would love to have kids. . . you're, you're the, you're, me play the songs that I will write for them.
JOEY: Hey, whaddya wanna do for dinner?
Monica: Uh, so, uh, Rach, uh... do you wanna save this wrapping paper, I mean, it's only a little bit torn... so are you gonna go for it with Ross or should I just throw it out?
Rachel: Ugh, is she pregnant yet? She doesnt need to be; shell still have the baby before I do. Oh Ross, another contraction! (Leans back on Ross for some support.)
PHOEBE: Thank you for coming everybody. There're cookies in the back.
Ross: Well, of course you can defend yourself from an attack you know is coming, thats not enough. Look, I studying kara-tay for a long time, and theres a concept you should really be familiar with. Its what the Japanese call (he holds two fingers up to his temple, and he does this every time he says this word) unagi.
JOEY: Yeah, that was a tricky one. In reality, that operation takes like, over 10 hours, but they only showed it for 2 minites.
CHANDLER: Oh, we're gonna flip for the baby?
Phoebe: I don't know, I mean, he's a good person, and he can be really sweet, and in some ways I think he is so right for me, it's just... I hate that guy!
JOEY: Well, we're, we're just goin' over here so that we can get away from the horrible flesh eating virus, for the love of God woman, listen to me. Is he lookin', is he lookin'?
Benjamin: I've come here to apologize. I think I may have let my feelings for Charlie interfere with the interview process.
RACHEL: OK, I'm doin' it for ya.
(Chandler and Joey are dumbstruck for a moment)
[a voice in the background calls for makeup]
CHANDLER: OK that's not what he was doing. Alright, he was looking for his bus money.
[Chandler can't find his money in the pocket. In the meantime, another couple shows up, and Chandler turns away to look for his money]
ROSS: Ok, Pheebs! How 'bout we'll each just pay for what we had. It's no big deal.
ROSS: Thanks for letting me tag along tonight you guys.
CHANDLER: I'm going to the bathroom now. [leaves for the bathroom]
SUSIE: Meet me in the bathroom. [she leaves for the bathroom]
SUSIE: This is for the fourth grade.
ROSS: I got some, uh, hers and hers towels for Susan and Carol. And, uh, I got this blouse for mom.
MONICA: Well, what made you make the exception for me?
ROSS: Well, pretty incredible according to the message she left you on my machine. Hey, Chandler, why is this woman leaving a message for you on my machine?
[Scene: Library. Phoebe is getting ready to sing for the kids. Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there.]
MONICA: Just some stuff for the party.
MONICA: Well, bye for me too. [kisses him]
Rachel: (grabs Chandler by the shirt) All right, listen, smirky. If it wasn't for you and your stupid balloon, I would be on a plane watching a woman do this (makes a gesture like a stewardess pointing out exits) right now. But I'm not.
[Scene: A kitchen somewhere. Monica is interviewing for a job]
Earl: Oh yeah? I work in a cubicle surrounded by people. Ive been talking to you for five minutes now about killing myself and no ones even looked up from their desk. Hang-hang on. (To the people standing around his cubicle.) Hey everybody! Uh, Im gonna kill myself! (Theres no response; no one even looks up.) Ill get back to ya. (To Phoebe) I got nothing. Wait. (He sets the phone down.) Uh, hey Marge! (Mimes putting a gun to his head, pulling the trigger, and splattering his brain on the wall behind him. Then points to himself. Marge watches this, then goes back to work.) (To Phoebe) Ehh, nothing. Nothing.
Carol: Listen, we both know youre gonna do it cause youre not a jerk. Okay? So you can either sulk here for a half hour and then go pick them up, or save us both time and sulk in the car.
Chandler: Um, we're kind of having an emergency and we-we were looking for something...
MRS. GELLER: Well sweetie, we have a surprise for you. We're turning your room into a gym.
JOEY: It's gonna be worth it. It's a known fact that women love babies, all righ? Women love guys who love babies. It's that whole sensitive thing. Quick, aim him at that pack o' babes over there. Maybe one of them will break away. No, no wait, for get them, we got one, hard left. All right, gimme the baby.