words in movies
Phoebe: Yeah, I should probably take it back. Ooh, but you know what? While I'm at the police station, I could check their Ten Most Wanted lists because my friend Fritzy has been like number 11 forever, so this could be her year! (She crosses her fingers in hope.)
Rachel: Yeah! (She puts on her coat and turns around and sees Ross is expecting her to help.) (Laughing.) Are you kiddin'?
Rachel: (Disgustedly she goes and tries to pick up the couch. Much to her amazement, she is successful.) Oh. Oh! I can do it!
The Salesman: Well you, her, I mean, she's very y'know. And you're like y'know.
[Scene: Outside of Central Perk, Phoebe is exiting and sees a woman put out her cigarette on a tree.]
Phoebe: You apologize to the tree right now or I am calling for backup. (The woman calls her bluff.) (Screaming at no one in particular) Backup! Backup!!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Phoebe is telling Chandler and Monica how she fought crime in her own way with the badge she found.]
Phoebe: You could get arrested, right now! (Flashes the badge and they glare at her.) All right, yeah, I gotta take it back. I'm totally drunk with power. (She heads for the door just as Joey enters.)
Joey: Don't worry, there wasn't any sex in it or anything. I haven't dreamt about her like that since I found out about you two--ish.
Chandler: Joey, look, are you attracted to Monica? Right here, right now, are you attracted to her?
Joey: (looks at her) Not really.
Cop: (stopping her) Hey, wait a second! So wait, what precinct are you with?
Cop: (following her) Hey by the way, I'm sure Sipowicz is gonna be all right. I heard that kid from Silver Spoons is really good. (Phoebe's stunned) And where did you find my badge?
(He starts staring at her longingly.)
Joey: I'll treat you real nice. (Pulls out a chair for her.)
Joey: Well because you didn't give me advice! No! You gave me a pickup line! As soon as I told her I wanted to y'know, build a foundation and be friends first. I suddenly, through no fault of my own, became irresistible to her! (Pause) And her roommate!
Phoebe: Well, if I'm going down, I'm taking you (Points at all of them) with me. (They all look at her.) Harboring a fugitive? That's one to three years minimum. Good luck Chandler. (She opens the door to the cop from before.) Okay, you can arrest me. Fine. But you'll never make it stick and you know it!
[Scene: The fancy restaurant, Angela has her hand in Bob's shirt, and Monica is very uncomfortable.]
RACHEL: Look at her.
Monica: My god, if I had a nickel for every guy I wish I hadn't...(Everyone looks at her), but this is about your horrible mistake.
PHOEBE: Why not her?
Monica: Me? What are you talking about? Nobody could steal me from you. I mean, just because I'm friends with her doesn't make me any less friends with you. I mean, (starting to cry) you're my...We're, we're...Oh, I love you.
MONICA: Well, how bout just her mom?
CHANDLER: Why her mom?
Phoebe: (Monica is yanking on her bra strap) Bras! We bought bras! We bought bras.
PHOEBE: Ok, so I guess we don't invite her parents.
Joey: Anyway! Her and Ross just started yelling at each other.
Mackenzie: This is what my mom was talking about. Whiners are wieners. (Joey glares at her angrily) Look, you want your friends to be happy, right?
Ross: Not the first two, but the second two- woooo! ...I love you guys. You guys are the greatest. I love my sister (Kisses Monica), I love Pheebs... (Hugs her)
EDDIE: That's very interesting, ya know, 'cause that's exactly what someone who slept with her would say.
CHANDLER: I, I know. [Hugs her. Ross walks out and Chandler puts her in his arms.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica and Richard are in her bedroom.]
Phoebe: Oh well, as long as it is under control, you know, you can't do anything about it, he's already dating her, and she is a nice person, that wouldn't be right.
Chandler: No-no! This is my fiancee (Phoebe) and her heart was set on that ring. You dont want to break her heart now do you?
MONICA: I've been great, just great. How have you been? [tilting her head]
Phoebe: (running after her) Rach, its gonna be okay! (To Ross and Joey) You guys are the best!
Ross: Alright, alright. We're all adults here, there's only one way to resolve this. Since you saw her boobies, I think, uh, you're gonna have to show her your peepee.
PHOEBE: I got it. [Wipes it up with her mits.]
MONICA: Cause I already invited her.
[Ross picks her up.]
Chandler: Come on, you're going to Bloomingdale's with Julie? That's like cheating on Rachel in her house of worship.
Rachel: Thats all right. (He goes to get her a soda.) And so it begins.
Phoebe: Wait. Why was he yelling at her? Hes the one who slept with someone else.
Rachel: Oh, yknow I'm not that much of a sweet tooth. I(Chandler puts a forkful of the cheesecake in her mouth.)Wow. My God, so creamy. Oh my God, this is the best cheesecake I have ever had. Where did you get this? (She reaches over to look at the label on the box.)
ROSS: Wow, well uh, uh, actually, Julie's downstairs getting a cab, I just need the cat toy, did Monica say. . . What? Why, why are you looking at me like that? RACH: I don't know, I, I feel like I had a dream about you last night but I, I don't remember. ROSS: OK. Oh, oh, oh. [runs over and picks up the cat toy] RACH: Did we speak on the phone last night? Did you call me? ROSS: No, I stayed at Julie's last night. RACH: Huh. ROSS: Oh, actually I haven't even been home yet. Do you mind if I check my messages? RACH: Oh yeah, go ahead. [Rachel walks in her room. Ross picks up the phone and dials his machine to check his messages.] ROSS: Rach, I got a message from you. [pauses] Who's Michael? [Rachel comes out of her room, suddenly she remembers leaving the message.]
CHANDLER: Okay, it's not a guy, all right, I know her.
Phoebe: (reading from her book) Mon (Pause as she restarts) Marcia and Chester are planning on seeing a movie on Sunday night. Marcia thinks theyre supposed to meet at six, Chester thinks its at seven.
ROSS: Okay, good luck (kisses her and leaves)
MONICA: MEG was good for me but I dumped her. Ya know, my motto is get out before they go down.
ROSS: (runs after her) No, Rach!
ROSS: (seeing her also) Yeah, 'cause life's just that kind.
Rachel: Well I just came...(She touches him near his heart. Shes almost in tears.) I just needed to tell you...(Looking into his eyes. She takes a deep breath.) Congratulations. (He hugs her. She can barely hold back the tears.)
JANICE: OH.....MY.....GAWD!! (Chandler rushes over and kisses her)
Joey: Oh, it was great! I mean we walked all around the village. We went to this ice cream place, split a milkshake, 70/30 but still And guess what, Im thinking about taking her upstate to one of those bed and breakfasts.
(Monica enters from her bedroom)
Joey: (under his breath) Kiss her! Kiss her!
Rachel: Well, like anything can be sexy. Like umm, oh-oh, like this dishtowel! (She grabs it and starts rubbing it on her cheek.) Ooh, ooh, this feels sooo good against my cheek! And-and if I feel a little hot, I can just dab myself with it. Or I can bring it down to my side and bring it through my fingers while I talk to him.
Rachel: (starts laughing, Ross stares at her) Im sorry. Im sorry. Youre right, you are a tough guy. Youre the toughest palaeontologist I know.
Chandler: Oh, no, no, no, don't go! I've scared ya'! I've said too much! I'm hopeless, and awkward, and desperate for love!! (Janice leaves, Chandler then calls Janice to leave a message on her machine) Hey, Janice! It's me. Um, yeah, I-I-I just wanna apologize in advance for having chased you down the street. (runs out the door)
Rachel: Well, let's see... uh... I know that she has a meeting with her lawyer and then she has to make a very big poop. Why?
Chandler: I want you to say that you like her!
Ross: How could you have told her?
JOEY: Oh no, can't invite her. She also steals.
[they kiss and Ross backs her into her apartment and turns on the lights]
[Scene: Monica's bedroom, Phoebe is trying to relax her.]
Chandler: I can't call her, I left a message! I have some pride.
CHAN: My diary! My diary, that's brilliant. I should have told her it was my diary, she never would have made me read her my diary.
(Chandler enters the bathroom, and Monica is standing there in a towel, with her hair stuck in the shower curtain.)
...My mother's ashes Even her eyelashes Are resting in a little yellow jar, And sometimes when it's breezy...
Rachel: (entering from her room) Is this a little too... (sees Phoebe) Pheebs, what happened?
Ross: Yeah, you didnt expect her to live there with a baby did you?
JOEY: Well, I don't know. I don't know what we're gonna be doin'. I mean, what if we're at her folks' place?
Monica: Okay. That was her right?
Ross: It was, it was her voice.
Monica: Absolutely! (He goes to kiss her, but she stops him and rubs his head and says...) Now get out of here you!! (Pete leaves) (to the gang) Okay, Im running out of places I can touch him! Look, is there something wrong with me? I mean why am I only attracted to guys where theres no future? Either theyre too old, or theyre too young, and then theres Pete whos-whos crazy about me, and whos absolutely perfect for me, and theres like zip going on! I mean, seriously, does it sound like somethings wrong with me?!
Monica: Okay, fine. (runs to her room)
Rachel: (entering from her room) Okay, Pheebs, quick, what shoes should I wear? The black or the purple?
Monica: Yeah, but her plane got delayed in Athens. But actually, (Checks watch) she should be here by now.
Monica: I can't believe Phoebe's gonna have her babies!
Chandler: (correcting her) Phil.
Larry: Maybe uh, Vunda could give me her number and I can ask her to dinner sometime.
CHANDLER: (noticing a beautiful blond walking in) Ooh, oh, oh, that's her.
Rachel: Oh man! This is so great! I actually feel like Im going on a real date! Although, I have a hint of morning sickness, and Im wearing underwear that goes up to about (She snaps the waistband on her underwear that is just slightly below her breasts) there.
Phoebe: Oh, okay. (he kisses her)
Ross: Oh! Hello uh, Mona from her restaurant. (He uses his card to mouth those words.) (Pause) Mona, wow what a, what a beautiful name.
Rachel: Now you're probably going to hire one of the people who did not ah, (She puts her hands on his desk blotter and he moves it. Rachel then doesn't know where to put her hands.) who did, who did not umm, yell at you and storm out, and I think that's a big mistake and here's why. I made a huge fool of myself and I came back, that shows courage. When I thought you wanted sex in exchange for this job, I said no. That shows integrity. And, I was not afraid to stand up for myself and that shows courage. (Suddenly realizes that she said courage twice.) Okay umm, now I know I already said courage, but y'know you gotta have courage. And umm, and finally when I thought you were making sexual advances in the workplace, I said no and I was not litigious. {By the way, litigious means to want to litigate and litigate is to make a lawsuit against. So she didn't want to sue him. Don't worry, I had to look it up too.} So there you go, you got, you got (counts them off with her fingers) courage, you got integrity, you got (Pause) courage again, and not litigious. Look Mr
Rachel: Honey, you got a little thing on your...(points to her whole face)
(Rachel enters, she has changed once again. This time into her high school cheerleading uniform.)
Phoebe: Well, it was just, it was all so crazy, you know. I mean, Chandler was in the closet, counting to 10, and he was up to 7 and I hadn't found a place to hide yet. I-I-I meant to tell you, and I wrote it all down on my hand. See, all of it. (shows him her hand)
Phoebe: Yes, it was! It was him! Uh huh! (they all stare at her) Okay, it was me!
Phoebe: That is unfair. I'll call her and tell her it was totally my fault.
Chandler: (escorting Joey to the door) You have to get out of here. You slept with our social worker and you never called her back and she is still pissed, so she can't see you.
Chandler: Okay, okay. So, should I call her?
(He kisses her on her shoulder, then her neck, then the side of her face, then just before he kisses her on the lips....)
Chandler: So I'm not, not gonna lose her?
(She hangs up, closes her phone, turns around and puts it in her bag which is in the back of the car. While doing this and not looking at the road, she turns the steering wheel by accident, which makes the car swerve.)
Chandler: I said, 'So I'm not gonna lose her?'
Ross: (buzzes) Wrong! Now you're single. It's actually secret option number three, you meet her at the gate. That way she knows you love her.
Joey: (Checks to see if shes drooling on his shirt.) Okay. Okay, okay, hey. (Lays her down and covers her with a blanket.) There we go, lets get your feet up there. (Looks at her) Good night, Kate. Sweet dreams. (Picks up a garbage can) Im gonna put this can right here in case you have to hurl.
RACH: Well. [looks at watch] Woah, look at that! I gotta go, I gotta date. With a man. Um, OK, you guys have a really, uh, have a really good night and you two have a, uh, have a, uh, really good cat. [she leaves carrying her tray then comes back in] OK, we're not supposed to take these when we leave.
Monica: (going through her pockets) No... (to Chandler and Phoebe) Either of you girls got a quarter?
JOEY: But wait, wait, wait. Then, after I left her office, she caught up with me at the elevator and offered me an even bigger part.
Dina: Look, Rachels told me how much easier youve made all this on her. Why cant you do that for me?
Ross: (moving over to stand in front of her) Okay, okay. This morning you said there was nothing so big that we couldnt work past it together...
Joey: Her what?
Rachel: Oh, Monica made me send her to my mother's. Apparently babies and weddings don't mix.
Phoebe: Now (Starts singing again) "Who will perform the ceremony! Who will perform the cer(Chandler enters and grabs her guitar and closes the door behind him)Ohoh! All right, Ill pound on him in the morning.
CHANDLER: What if I never find someone? Or worse, what if I've found her, but I dumped her because she pronounced it "supposably"?
Chandler: Whoa-ho, back off, Missy! (He takes a step back, but she still keeps her grip on his tie.)
Monica: You don't tell me what to do! I tell you what to do! Just call her. She's at the Paradise Hotel in Barbados. And while I've got you, you've got curly hair. What do you do in humidity? (Mike hangs up the phone) Damnit!
(Chandler enters and they both jump up and pretend that Ross is showing her something in the couch.)
Ross: I don't know. It was incredible. I mean, it just felt so right. When I was holding her, I mean, I never wanted to let her go. You know what? Yeah, I do. I wanna be together.
Monica: Wait a minute! Unless, we give her all gifts she can use after shes done being pregnant. Like-like umm, regular coffee, Tequila.
Phoebe: You cant have sex with her!
Frank: Well, when I tell my friends about her she will be.
Ross: Damn! I cant believe I took her off my list.
Ross: What you dont think Id go up to her?