words in movies
Joey: Hey Ross, check this out! (he tries to spin a basketball on his fingertip but he throws it against a table) yeah, I can't do that!
Ross: No... I already e-mailed her.
Chandler: Let me see what you wrote about yourself: "Doctor Paleontology, two kids... " (pause) You split with Carol because you have different interests?... I think you split with Carol because you've one very similar interest!
Chandler: Maybe we finish this for him! (he sits down on the sofa and he start typing on Ross' computer) "Also I cloned a dinosaur in my lab. She's now my girlfriend. I don't care what society says. It's the best sex I've ever had"... aaand SEND!
Ross: I think you made it clear you cannot be trusted with the ball inside the house!
Rachel: She was just crawling around and she found him, so I just let her sleep with him. That's all right? Isn't it?
Joey: (still very puzzled) Oh, yeah... of course... yeah... it's a stuffed animal... you know... it's for kids... not for adults... I know that!
Rachel: Joey... are you sure? I mean, I know how much you love him!
Joey: Rachel... let's be clear on this, ok? I do not love Hugsy. I like him a normal amount...
Phoebe: Breaking up sucks! Oh, I really miss Mike!
Phoebe: Oh God, I tried everything to make myself feel better. I even tried writing a song about it... but... I can't think of anything that rhymes with AARRGGHH!! (pause) Hey Monica, I really need your help getting through this...
Phoebe: Well no, when I get to the point where... you know... I'm ready to hear cruel mocking jokes about Mike... I'm gonna come to you.
Phoebe: Ok. I mean I know I did the right thing. You know, Mike never wants to get married and I shouldn't be in a relationship that has no future... but... pretty soon I'm gonna miss him so much. I'm gonna wanna see him again and you have to stop me from doing that.
Phoebe: (after a pause) Unless... Maybe it's too crazy about this... Alright so... you know, there is no future... but that doesn't mean we still can't have fun. You know what? Forget what I said.
Ross: (yelling at Chandler) I have sex with dinosaurs??
Chandler: I believe I read that somewhere!
Chandler: I respectfully disagree.
Ross: I can't believe you put that on my alumni page!
Ross: You'd better hope not because I just read what you put on your page today.
Chandler: I don't have a page.
Ross: Oh oh oh! I RESPECTFULLY DISAGREE!!
Rachel: (threatening Joey with a scrunchy): Step away from the crib, I have a weapon!
Joey: Well, I heard Emma stirring, so I came to make sure she could reach Hugsy.
Chandler: Because I told everyone he slept with dinosaurs.
Monica: (On the phone) Hello? No, he's not here. Yeah, this is his wife. Yeah, well, it came as quite a shock to me too. I guess I should have known. Yeah, I mean, he just kept making me watch Moulin Rouge.
Ross: Posting that I died? That really isn't funny.
Chandler: You wanna talk about people's feelings? You should have heard how hurt professor Stern was yesterday when I told him I wouldn't be able to go with him to Key West!
Phoebe: God, I wish Mike were here.
Phoebe: I gotta call him. Just to talk to him, there's no harm in that.
Monica: Phoebe, that's how it starts. I don't need to eat the cake, I'll just smell the icing... why don't I just eat a little sliver, or, okay, just a slice or two. And next thing you know, you're 210 pounds and you get wedged in going down the tunnel slide. Phoebe, honey, I know this is hard. Look, if you talk to him, you're going to wanna see him. And if you see him, you're going to want to get back together with him. I know that's not what you want. (pause) Give me your phone.
Joey: No, no, Emma has one Hugsy, the new Hugsy, huh? The other Hugsy, I don't know, I guess I'll just take it back.
Rachel: Oh you know what? When I was a little girl I had a little pink pony named Cotton. Oh I loved her so much, I took her everywhere, I would braid her tail...
Rachel: Should I be concerned that a button fell off the old Hugsy and I can't find it?
Joey: Oh, no don't worry about that, I swallowed that years ago.
Rachel: Oh, I don't think she likes the new Hugsy.
Rachel: Yeah, I think she wants the old one back.
Phoebe: Monica, I really appreciate you checking in on me, but I'm actually feeling a lot better. Yeah, I just kinda want to be alone right now.
Phoebe: I ordered Chinese food.
Phoebe: I'm sorry, I broke down... I wanted to see him.
Mike: Look, if I wanna see Phoebe and she wants to see...
Mike: Oh! Sorry, I guess I was thrown off by the mention of my name!
Monica: You know, on the way over here, I saw this drunk guy throw up. And then a pigeon ate it!
Chandler: Hey, Ross, I just wanted to apologize... (looks at laptop screen)..don't tell me you actually made those gay pictures of me?
Chandler: Huh! So that's what I would look like if I worked out... and was being serviced by a policeman. You're not actually going to send these out are ya?
Ross: Eh..actually no, I don't need to because your little "Ross is dead" joke didn't work, ok, there were no responses. Nobody posted anything on the website, nobody called my parents, so the joke my friend is on you. Nobody called, nobody wrote anything, nobody cares that I'm dead. (silence) Oh my God! Nobody cares that I'm dead!?
Ross: What are you talking about? You get sixty responses just for coming out of the closet! I didn't get one response! And I'm dead!
Ross: I can't believe this. Not even my geology lab partner? And I carried that guy! (gets up from his sofa)
Chandler: Right, I mean, come on, I'm sure that if you had a funeral or a memorial service, tons of people would come.
Joey: Alright!! Fine! It's original Hugsy! No, now I know that Emma wants him but he's mine and I need him..
Rachel: Oh yeah! But you know what? If you need Hugsy, don't worry. Emma will totally understand. I won't... but whatever (She leaves the room).
Joey: Ok, wait wait wait wait a minute wait a minute, I mean Rach, I mean if if... . If Hugsy means that much to Emma then... well she can have him.
Rachel: Oooh... you're sweet, I knew uncle Joey would step up. (Turns to face Emma in the the playpen) Look Emma, look who's baaack!
Joey: Look forget it forget it... I can't do it.
Joey: How do you think I got him in the first place?
Monica: Alright you two, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Now I don't want anything going on while I'm gone. Here's a few things you can discuss: mucus, fungus and the idea of me and Ross doing it.
Mike: I've missed you so much! No, I'm not gonna ask you to get back together because I know we want different things, but just to be with you one more night.
Phoebe: I know, I want that too, but IS that going to make it too hard?
Mike: It can't be any harder than this... I mean, If I had known the last time I saw you would be the last time, I... I would have stopped to memorize your face, the way you move, everything about you. If I had known the last time I kissed you would have been the last time... I never would have stopped.
Monica: Didn't you hear that speech? If you don't kiss him then I will!
Phoebe: Oh, I missed you so much! (she kisses Mike)
Strange man: (he bounds into the house) I knew you'd be here!
Mike: My friend Manny. I asked him to keep me away from you.
Monica: Hey, at least I knew where my guy was.
Manny: Oh we blew it. I blame myself.
Monica: And I blame you too.
Ross: It's been an hour and not one of my classmates has shown up! I tell you, when I actually die some people are gonna get seriously haunted!
Tom: Hi, you're Chandler Bing, right? I'm Tom Gordon, I was in your class.
Ross: I don't remember him, but then again I touched so many lives. (they press their ears against the door)
Tom: Oh, actually I barely knew him. Yeah, I came because I heard Chandler's news. D'you know if he's seeing anyone?
Tom: What? You... You... Oh! Can I ask you a personal question? Ho-how do you shave your beard so close?
Monica: I look like a man??
Ross: Yes, you're right. Still somebody must have seen it... I mean, I went to that school for 4 years, I didn't have an impact on anyone?
Chandler: Oh, that's not true. You had an impact on me, I mean, it's 15 years later and we're still best friends. Doesn't that count for something?
Kori: I can't believe that Ross is gone. It is just so sad.
Chandler: I didn't know Ross and you were so close.
Kori: We weren't but we had one class together. He was such a great guy and he talked so passionately about science. I always remembered him.
Kori: I thought so many times about calling him and asking him out. I guess I really missed my chance.
Ross: (he bounds into the lounge room) But you didn't! I'm still alive!! Kori, I know this is a big surprise for you. It's a long story but the things you just said really made my day! I mean, the fact that you are here means more to me than if this room were filled with people!
Kori: You sick freak, who does that? I can't believe I had a crush on you! (she leaves and slams the door behind her)
Ross: (on the phone) No Mum, I'm not dead. I know it's not something to kid about. It was just a practical joke between Chandler and me, but it's over, ok? (pause) Actually no, even if I had died, you would not be left childless. (pause) Monica?
Monica: No-no, I-I just, I liked them so much that I went out and bought some for myself.
Monica: Thank you. Rachel, can I talk to you outside for a sec?
Will: Yeah, I hated her. She was horrible to me in high school. But hey, it was a long time ago, Im in a good place, it might be actually fun to see her again. You got any cakes or cookies or something? (Starts looking.) No Will no!
Rachel: Wow, thats great Ross, Im sorry we werent more supportive before.
Chandler: Im sorry man, theres never a good time to (pauses) stop catching on fire.
Monica: (threatening) Don't get too cocky! Remember I won the last one! Oh, by the way, how did that feel, losing to a girl?
Ross: (on the phone) Yes, hello. I have a question. Umm, I used your pen to draw on my friend's face. (Listens) A beard and a moustache. (Listens and laughs) Thank you. (Rachel turns around and glares at him.) No, she didn't think so. (Listens) I know it's like (turns and sees Rachel staring at him and quickly changes the subject) anyway, umm well make-up didn't cover it and we've tried everything to get it off and nothing's worked. What-what do we do? (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Oh! Okay. (Listens) Okay, thank you! (Rachel gets excited at his tone.) (Hangs up the phone) Yeah, it's not coming off.
Rachel: (Resenting the truth) I am not a baby! You know what? I swear to god, just because you get so uptight every time we...
Joey: Yeah! I don't want you on the trip!
Phoebe: No it's just that I got this new pager and I have it on vibrate. See ya!
Monica: I figured out I need to charge seventeen bucks a jar just to break even. So, I've got a new plan now. Babies.
Monica: (following her) Phoebe! I have to have those earrings, we're going to leave as soon as the show is over.
Monica: Okay, but there is a wire back there! I mean that switch is connected to something!
Phoebe: Oh yeah, oh and I know, but this isnt what it looks like, cause Rick is my ahh, husband.
Joey: I just have to call my agent and tell her I cant do the part. (Gets up for the phone.)
Woman on TV: I came to the big city to become a star! Ill do anything to make that happen!
Chandler: Well, I dont have to buy that, "Im with stupid" T-shirt anymore.
Mrs. Geller: Here, sweetie, here. I took these when I had my golfing accident. (Hands Ross a bottle of pills. Then turns to Monica and pats her hair over her ears)
Joey: I dont know, Chandler is supposed to be passin em around...
Larry: Just walking past the kitchen I saw 10 violations! I'm shutting this place down!
Rachel: So what do you say? Can I be your girlfriend again?
Phoebe: Oh, come on! Yes, remember that time on the frozen lake? We were playing chess, you said I was boring, and then you took off your energy mask and you were Cameron Diaz! (Realizes) Okay, there's a chance this may have been a dream.
Chandler: I will loan you the money. Just go to the hospital and lets just get that thing pushed back in.
Joey: Sure, now Im scared.
Chandler: Oh, I just went for a walk, around the living room. Whatever
Ross: What?! The guys against the girls? See, thats ridiculous Monica, because Im only down by three touchdowns.
Phoebe: (turns around and hits Frank) So thats what you thought I did!! God! Thats not what I do!
Joey: Yeah, but I dont wanna die!
Joey: Ooh, like the time you and I went to Atlantic City and I made you laugh so hard you threw up your whole steak?! Remember?
Ross: Okay! (Walks away from him.) Umm, I uh, Im your teacher. Im sorry, youre-youre a student and I-and I like women. In spite of what may be written on the backs of some of these chairs.
(They go around the last row of bookshelves and find a couple doing what college coeds do in secluded corners of university libraries. For those of you who dont know what Im talking about, lets just say that clothing is undone. Ross gasps and the couple gets up and runs away.)
Ross: (entering) Look, I really need some help, okay? Why? Why did I have to speak in a British accent?! What do I do?
Ross: I think he's been relaxing enough, thanks to you and Fireball.
Monica: I think you look fine.
Ross: Monica you really think I should try this phasing out thing?
Rachel: Yeah, I mean, come on Ross, no one will even notice. I mean theyre probably not even listening!
Chandler: I can tell from your expressions that that's the good news you were hoping for... Well, I'm gonna go continue to... spread the joy.(Chandler leaves the apartment. Joey sighs)
JANITOR: Word on the street - well, when I say street, I mean those little pretend streets they have here at the zoo.
Phoebe: Listen to this! My reading was wrong, Im not going die!
Rachel: Oh, Im sorry.
Rachel: No-n-n-n-no! I am finally thinking clearly. My lucky dress wasnt working out to well for me, but for four years, this baby never missed.
Rachel: Im sorry, I just cant go to the hospital lookin like this.
Monica: I gotcha. Sorry. (To Monica) So, did you ever make him throw up a whole anything?
Chandler: Listen, Im really glad you got the part.
Phoebe: Oh, I can't believe you guys lasted a whole year!
Joey: I just said that so you wouldn't let Ben do it! Look Ross, if anyone should step aside it should be Ben!
Rachel: (To the woman sitting in front of her) He-he said Rachel, right? Do you think I should go up there?
Chandler: (entering with Rachel) Im telling ya, Joannas got it all wrong. Okay? All I said was, This was fun. Lets do it again sometime. Ill give you a call.
Rachel: Hi! I got you some coffee. To, uh (She looks for a place to set it on his messy desk and he clears a spot for her to set it down.) fair enough. So! Do you got anything for me?
Rachel: Uh no, hes not. Can I take a message?
Rachel: No, I don't! Ross, I think I'm just a more secure person than you are.
CHANDLER: You know, I once dated a Miss Crankypants. Lovely girl, kinda moody.
Ross: No thats not what I want. Uh, Im glad you guys were bonding but I
Rachel: Well, youve been here for two months now and your boss is required to hand in a performance evaluation. But yknow, there is one thing that I have yet to evaluate. (She turns around and sweeps the stuff off of her desk and hops up onto it.)
Joey: I could use a challenge! Its getting pretty easy.
Chandler: Because weddings are a great place to meet women, and when I dance, I look like this (Starts to dancing really, really, really badly. Ross enters behind him and he stops.)
Monica: Are you insane? I mean Joey, is going to kill you, hes actually going to kill you dead.
Chandler: (he stands up and he feels very offended) I don't, and I'm offended by the insinuation!
Rachel: I cannot believe that you didnt tell me that we are still married!!
Phoebe: I dont know, they both want to live in a house of cheese! I dont know how you fight that.
Ross: Let me see, I gotta see, I gotta see. Oh, a head. Oh, it's, it's huge. Carol, how are you doing this?
Joey: Look, just because I know about you two, doesn't mean I like looking at it.
Luisa: Well, maybe that's because you spent four years ignoring me. I mean, would it have been so hard to say 'Morning, Luisa'? Or 'Nice overalls'?
Ross: Phoebe, I told her you already knew.
Phoebe: (angrily) Thats like the tenth time Ive peed since Ive been here!
Rachel: Yeah, I feel kinda bad for them, but Im also really psyched cause I dont have to move in here!
Cop: Okay, so since umm, you're not going to jail tonight I was wondering if you would like to go to dinner with me?
Rachel: I don't know, I'm not trying to do anything, it's just, we have such a good time when we're together, you know... I mean, aren't you just a... little curious... (insinuating) what that would be like?...
Monica: It's okay. I don't care. It's uh, it's fine.
Woman: (walking up) I love your car.
Monica: What is the matter with you?!! Why arent you more upset?! Arent you gonna be sad that were not gonna be living together anymore?! I mean arent you gonna miss me at all?!
Woman: I bet its fast.
Monica: Wait, no-no-no, I can go really fast! Dad, give me the keys to your Porsche!
Rachel: Ross! Yknow what, I just gotwhy? Why did you do this?!
Ross: Look I told you
JOEY: I did do it, I'm a professional.
Phoebe: Its me. Its Phoebe. Listen theres something in here I want to eat, what-what smells so good?
Joey: Okay! (He yanks his hand away.) All right. Umm, all right Wayne, level with me. Okay? I-I keep hearing all these rumors that I might get fired. Okay, they even have actors coming in to read for my part! Come on man, you-you got to give me a second chance! I mean, I love-I love this little guy! (He grabs C.H.E.E.S.E.s arm and pulls it off at the elbow.) Ah-ah!! (Wayne is shocked.) Okay, thats why you didnt want me to touch him right? Here you go! Okay? (Hands Wayne the arm and he goes to fix it. Meanwhile Joey starts to berate himself.) Stupid! I cant believe it! God! (A very beautiful woman walks by.) (To her) Hey, how you doin? (He and her go over to talk and Wayne looks on with envy.)
Rachel: Yeah, no, I don't-I don't put things in my eye.
Monica: No that was Jarred! Wow! I havent thought about him in a long time (Stares off into the distance lost in thought.) (Pause) Anyway, umm Wills, Wills here on business and he didnt have a place to go so I invited him here.
{Y'know, sometimes I think the script writers throw in a line like that to try to trip me up. But it won't work. I'll always have the last laugh! <manical_laugh.wav> Okay, so maybe I'm a little deluded, it's probably just my spellchecker. But, I must admit I did get Mesozoic and Paleozoic on the first attempt. Yay me! Anyhoo }
Ross: What about the time I said we were on a break?
Rachel: Well-well that's 'cause I went down there and they were all smoking. This is actually the smell of success.
Phoebe: Yeah? (Checking the final diaper) Well this is not what I ordered.
Phoebe: This is fashion?! (Grabs the coat from Rachel.) Okay, so to you, death is fashion?! That's really funny. (She puts the coat on and starts to model it.) Here's Phoebe umm, sporting uh, y'know, cutting edge hairy carcass from y'know, the steal traps of wintry Russia. I mean, you really thing this looks good? (Sees herself in the mirror.) 'Cause I do.
Guy #2: Well, Ill see you later.
Joey: Yeah, so did I.
Billy: (to Joey) Hey, Im trying to have a private conversation! Is that okay?!
The Porsche Owner: I live upstate.
DR. REMORE: I know you do but you and I can never be together that way.
Charlie: Oh my God, I completely forgot! (they laugh) Oh my God! I can't believe they let us back in this place! (they laugh more, and Ross start laughing too).
Meg: Okay now I wouldnt date you because you seem a little creepy.
Phoebe: Oh, I can still do that.
Joey: Yeah, yeah, I met this woman. (Starts for his room.)
Mrs. Waltham: Were very sad that it didnt work out between you and Emily, monkey. But, I think youre absolutely delicious.
Chandler: Did I? Let's refresh. I believe what I said was that I could see your scalp.
Rachel: (starts to cry) Ross, please, I found the magazines!
The Director: (returning) Okay, Im afraid to say this, but lets pick it up where we left off.
Ross: And, I came up with Atlantic City.
Joey: Yeah!! I call that London style.