words in movies
Joey: Hey Ross, check this out! (he tries to spin a basketball on his fingertip but he throws it against a table) yeah, I can't do that!
Ross: No... I already e-mailed her.
Chandler: Let me see what you wrote about yourself: "Doctor Paleontology, two kids... " (pause) You split with Carol because you have different interests?... I think you split with Carol because you've one very similar interest!
Chandler: Maybe we finish this for him! (he sits down on the sofa and he start typing on Ross' computer) "Also I cloned a dinosaur in my lab. She's now my girlfriend. I don't care what society says. It's the best sex I've ever had"... aaand SEND!
Ross: I think you made it clear you cannot be trusted with the ball inside the house!
Rachel: She was just crawling around and she found him, so I just let her sleep with him. That's all right? Isn't it?
Joey: (still very puzzled) Oh, yeah... of course... yeah... it's a stuffed animal... you know... it's for kids... not for adults... I know that!
Rachel: Joey... are you sure? I mean, I know how much you love him!
Joey: Rachel... let's be clear on this, ok? I do not love Hugsy. I like him a normal amount...
Phoebe: Breaking up sucks! Oh, I really miss Mike!
Phoebe: Oh God, I tried everything to make myself feel better. I even tried writing a song about it... but... I can't think of anything that rhymes with AARRGGHH!! (pause) Hey Monica, I really need your help getting through this...
Phoebe: Well no, when I get to the point where... you know... I'm ready to hear cruel mocking jokes about Mike... I'm gonna come to you.
Phoebe: Ok. I mean I know I did the right thing. You know, Mike never wants to get married and I shouldn't be in a relationship that has no future... but... pretty soon I'm gonna miss him so much. I'm gonna wanna see him again and you have to stop me from doing that.
Phoebe: (after a pause) Unless... Maybe it's too crazy about this... Alright so... you know, there is no future... but that doesn't mean we still can't have fun. You know what? Forget what I said.
Ross: (yelling at Chandler) I have sex with dinosaurs??
Chandler: I believe I read that somewhere!
Chandler: I respectfully disagree.
Ross: I can't believe you put that on my alumni page!
Ross: You'd better hope not because I just read what you put on your page today.
Chandler: I don't have a page.
Ross: Oh oh oh! I RESPECTFULLY DISAGREE!!
Rachel: (threatening Joey with a scrunchy): Step away from the crib, I have a weapon!
Joey: Well, I heard Emma stirring, so I came to make sure she could reach Hugsy.
Chandler: Because I told everyone he slept with dinosaurs.
Monica: (On the phone) Hello? No, he's not here. Yeah, this is his wife. Yeah, well, it came as quite a shock to me too. I guess I should have known. Yeah, I mean, he just kept making me watch Moulin Rouge.
Ross: Posting that I died? That really isn't funny.
Chandler: You wanna talk about people's feelings? You should have heard how hurt professor Stern was yesterday when I told him I wouldn't be able to go with him to Key West!
Phoebe: God, I wish Mike were here.
Phoebe: I gotta call him. Just to talk to him, there's no harm in that.
Monica: Phoebe, that's how it starts. I don't need to eat the cake, I'll just smell the icing... why don't I just eat a little sliver, or, okay, just a slice or two. And next thing you know, you're 210 pounds and you get wedged in going down the tunnel slide. Phoebe, honey, I know this is hard. Look, if you talk to him, you're going to wanna see him. And if you see him, you're going to want to get back together with him. I know that's not what you want. (pause) Give me your phone.
Joey: No, no, Emma has one Hugsy, the new Hugsy, huh? The other Hugsy, I don't know, I guess I'll just take it back.
Rachel: Oh you know what? When I was a little girl I had a little pink pony named Cotton. Oh I loved her so much, I took her everywhere, I would braid her tail...
Rachel: Should I be concerned that a button fell off the old Hugsy and I can't find it?
Joey: Oh, no don't worry about that, I swallowed that years ago.
Rachel: Oh, I don't think she likes the new Hugsy.
Rachel: Yeah, I think she wants the old one back.
Phoebe: Monica, I really appreciate you checking in on me, but I'm actually feeling a lot better. Yeah, I just kinda want to be alone right now.
Phoebe: I ordered Chinese food.
Phoebe: I'm sorry, I broke down... I wanted to see him.
Mike: Look, if I wanna see Phoebe and she wants to see...
Mike: Oh! Sorry, I guess I was thrown off by the mention of my name!
Monica: You know, on the way over here, I saw this drunk guy throw up. And then a pigeon ate it!
Chandler: Hey, Ross, I just wanted to apologize... (looks at laptop screen)..don't tell me you actually made those gay pictures of me?
Chandler: Huh! So that's what I would look like if I worked out... and was being serviced by a policeman. You're not actually going to send these out are ya?
Ross: Eh..actually no, I don't need to because your little "Ross is dead" joke didn't work, ok, there were no responses. Nobody posted anything on the website, nobody called my parents, so the joke my friend is on you. Nobody called, nobody wrote anything, nobody cares that I'm dead. (silence) Oh my God! Nobody cares that I'm dead!?
Ross: What are you talking about? You get sixty responses just for coming out of the closet! I didn't get one response! And I'm dead!
Ross: I can't believe this. Not even my geology lab partner? And I carried that guy! (gets up from his sofa)
Chandler: Right, I mean, come on, I'm sure that if you had a funeral or a memorial service, tons of people would come.
Joey: Alright!! Fine! It's original Hugsy! No, now I know that Emma wants him but he's mine and I need him..
Rachel: Oh yeah! But you know what? If you need Hugsy, don't worry. Emma will totally understand. I won't... but whatever (She leaves the room).
Joey: Ok, wait wait wait wait a minute wait a minute, I mean Rach, I mean if if... . If Hugsy means that much to Emma then... well she can have him.
Rachel: Oooh... you're sweet, I knew uncle Joey would step up. (Turns to face Emma in the the playpen) Look Emma, look who's baaack!
Joey: Look forget it forget it... I can't do it.
Joey: How do you think I got him in the first place?
Monica: Alright you two, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Now I don't want anything going on while I'm gone. Here's a few things you can discuss: mucus, fungus and the idea of me and Ross doing it.
Mike: I've missed you so much! No, I'm not gonna ask you to get back together because I know we want different things, but just to be with you one more night.
Phoebe: I know, I want that too, but IS that going to make it too hard?
Mike: It can't be any harder than this... I mean, If I had known the last time I saw you would be the last time, I... I would have stopped to memorize your face, the way you move, everything about you. If I had known the last time I kissed you would have been the last time... I never would have stopped.
Monica: Didn't you hear that speech? If you don't kiss him then I will!
Phoebe: Oh, I missed you so much! (she kisses Mike)
Strange man: (he bounds into the house) I knew you'd be here!
Mike: My friend Manny. I asked him to keep me away from you.
Monica: Hey, at least I knew where my guy was.
Manny: Oh we blew it. I blame myself.
Monica: And I blame you too.
Ross: It's been an hour and not one of my classmates has shown up! I tell you, when I actually die some people are gonna get seriously haunted!
Tom: Hi, you're Chandler Bing, right? I'm Tom Gordon, I was in your class.
Ross: I don't remember him, but then again I touched so many lives. (they press their ears against the door)
Tom: Oh, actually I barely knew him. Yeah, I came because I heard Chandler's news. D'you know if he's seeing anyone?
Tom: What? You... You... Oh! Can I ask you a personal question? Ho-how do you shave your beard so close?
Monica: I look like a man??
Ross: Yes, you're right. Still somebody must have seen it... I mean, I went to that school for 4 years, I didn't have an impact on anyone?
Chandler: Oh, that's not true. You had an impact on me, I mean, it's 15 years later and we're still best friends. Doesn't that count for something?
Kori: I can't believe that Ross is gone. It is just so sad.
Chandler: I didn't know Ross and you were so close.
Kori: We weren't but we had one class together. He was such a great guy and he talked so passionately about science. I always remembered him.
Kori: I thought so many times about calling him and asking him out. I guess I really missed my chance.
Ross: (he bounds into the lounge room) But you didn't! I'm still alive!! Kori, I know this is a big surprise for you. It's a long story but the things you just said really made my day! I mean, the fact that you are here means more to me than if this room were filled with people!
Kori: You sick freak, who does that? I can't believe I had a crush on you! (she leaves and slams the door behind her)
Ross: (on the phone) No Mum, I'm not dead. I know it's not something to kid about. It was just a practical joke between Chandler and me, but it's over, ok? (pause) Actually no, even if I had died, you would not be left childless. (pause) Monica?
CHANDLER: Ohhh [turns as if to hug someone] Oh no, wait a minute, I have no one.
Joey: It wasnt my ring! It fell out of Rosss jacket! And when I knelt down to pick it up Rachel thought I was proposing!
Joey: No, Chandler. Look, forget about it, okay? Look, I know things have been a little tight since Janine moved out. Oh, was she hot.
Chandler: Actually, no. No, it felt right. You know, it felt like uhm... I can't believe we haven't been doing this the whole time.
Tim: Oh, Im so glad you called. I feel like its always me calling you. So, whats up? Is everything okay with Phoebe?
Precious: Screw you, Mike. You're a coward and a bastard, and I hope you rot in hell.
Phoebe: Hey, I never got to hear who you guys would pick to be your girlfriend.
Monica: Well you let me know if you can, because yknow I can bake a pie to cover it.
Phoebe: I cant believe you wont just admit it! (Pause) Okay, just promise me that you wont do anything stupid.
Chandler: 'Cause, I wanted to uh, give you this. (hands her a present)
Roy: You know, actually that's not a bad idea. I can do it out of my apartment. I don't think my mom would mind.
Joanna: Thats why I said all those things about your flirting and your drinking
Monica: Yeah! I mean it was really funny, I-I just don't think you got it. You see Kara's coffee is-is-is weak tasting, okay? But-but what Doug was-was imply that it was weak physically. You get it now honey?
Joey: I would sooner die in this hellhole then see her back with you!
Phoebe: Dont you see? Everyones looking at me! The plans working! I didnt even have to take off my top yet!
Chandler: Y'know, I can't believe I'm getting my nails done! And you said it was gonna be fun! (pause) Which it kinda is. Also, you said there would be other guys here. There are no other guys here!
ROSS: Shouldn't the pizza be here by now?� I mean, they said thirty minutes or less.� Well, how long has it been?
Monica: We have too! I mean what if Ross's hears that and then calls her back and then they get back together? Is that what you want? Ross back with that controlling, neurotic, crazy Emily? The Emily that wouldn't let him see you?
MONICA: It's just that he doesn't have that much free time, ya know, and I don't know, what do I do?
CHANDLER: I was looking forward to playing basketball, but I guess that's out the window.
Rachel: Oh yeah, I'm jealous. "Oh Gavin, please, please look at my ass". (Gavin starts looking) Stop looking at my ass! I mean, I just think you are totally inappropriate, ok? This is a work environment, she's your subordinate.
Chandler: And Im the happiest guy in the world! (Monica goes and sits down in a huff.) Oh honey, come on dont be upset. We still have so much to look forward to!
Ben: I have to go. My friend Doug is waiting for me over there. (Goes over to Doug.)
Ross: I knew it! I knew it! I always knew she liked him! Y'know, shed say no, but here we are! Right? We just broke up, first thing she does!
Monica: Ohh, this is soo amazing! I cant believe my brothers getting married! And in London! Its so romantic!
Monica: Youre supposed to double the tax. Not double the tax of Romania. I mean, whats-whats the deal? Are you, are you trying to buy me? Is this the way you get girls to go out with you?
Ross: Hey! Hey! Hey! I get to choose my best man, and I want both you guys.
Rachel: (entering) Hey Ross? Umm, I just ran into Caitlin in the hallway and-and uh, you must be getting better at this flirting stuff than I thought.
Joey: What am I going to do? You know, and I keep, I keep trying to get rid of these feelings, yknow? I stayed up all last night and made a list of everything I dont like about her. You want to hear it?
Ross: Paolo, I-I just want to tell you and I think I speak for everyone when I say... (shuts door in his face and walks away)
Janice: Uh-oh-okay. Uh-oh-okay. I know what you all are thinking. But Chandler is in Yemen! I'm a young woman! I have needs! I can't wait forever!
Chandler: All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring. Now I don't know what to do, everybody starts looking at me.
Ross: I guess he musta gotten the part in that play.
Chandler: I bought you. How did I forget that that's all you do?
Mike: (Ross opens the door) You know I'm trying to think of the last time I opened a door and you weren't there, Phoebe are you ok? (She has her hands over her mouth)
Rachel: No, I haven't had a chance to be alone with him yet.
Phoebe: Oh, I know a way that you can decide! All right, I'm going to ask you a series of questions and you answer as quickly as you can.
Chandler: Well, I have a girlfriend, Im-Im happy. So, I no longer feel the need to go out of my way to stop others from being happy.
Chandler: I'll try, but I'm not sure what good it would do, y'know? Because I'm a lot less afraid of commitment than I used to be.
Rachel: Oh no, I know I couldnt see it either at first, but its right umm (Starts to cry) Ross, I lost it again.
Ursula: No, I sold it to a Swedish runaway.
Monica: I know, hes too charming, but if you two start going out, then its just gonna make it so much harder for me to hate him.
Phoebe: Here, Monica, look what I got to wear when I play at the restaurant (she dons a top hat) uh, huh wait! (she raises a pair of spectacles to her eyes) Right? I mean, this might even class up the ballad of the uncircumcised man.
Chandler: Hes not supposed to ask my girlfriend to marry him! Im supposed to do that!
PHOEBE: Um well I don't really. Just genetically. He's kinda my dad too.
Frank: Then I go feel your friend up and make you mad at me.
Chandler: (from his bedroom) All right, so you're telling me that I have to tell racist jokes now?!
Rachel: I know! I know, she says its all mass-produced, nothing is authentic, and everyone winds up having the same stuff. (Ross looks at his table.) So come on, shes gonna be here any second! Can we please just cover this up with something?! Please?
MR. GELLER: I may not know any of your flash dances but I'm no slouch on the dance floor.
Chandler: Okay! (He grabs his carryon and starts rummaging through it.) Oh man! Dont tell me I did this!
Dina: And youre my big brother! I mean, youre my favorite guy in the whole world. Im not even scared to tell mom and dad. I was scared of telling you.
Ross: No, NO! (they're moving to the side of the bed, where they sit down) Look, I need to talk to Joey. I mean, you guys just broke up. Before anything more happens between us, I need to know he's okay with it.
Rachel: Well, y'know, the reason I didn't wanna go running with you is because um, well y'know the way that you run is a little...(Starts flapping her arms)
Ross: Well uh, I-Im a paleontologist. Umm, I-I live in New York. I have a son Ben. Uh, hi Ben! (Waves.) And uh
CHANDLER: I like this girl, okay, I seriously like this girl, you now how sometimes I tend get a little defended and quipy...
Chandler: Now that I untangled you, how 'bout you doing a little something for me?
Frank: Oh well, um, your, your laundry just smelled so good, that I thought Id curl up in it. Is that all right?
Melissa: Oh no, thats-thats an old card. Umm, I wanted to get out of that and-and do something where I can really help people and-and make a difference.
Rachel: I didnt uh, really have time to read this part of the books, but do you think we have time to
Janice: Oh! Youre right. Oh God. But, before I can say good-bye, theres something I really need you to know, Chandler. The way I feel about you, its like, I finally understand what Lionel Richies been singing about. Y'know, I mean what we have, its like movie love, youre my soulmate, and I cant believe were not going to be spending the rest of our lives together.
Phoebe: Oh... then I overpaid. (she goes to the bathroom)
The Teacher: Well hi, Im Jenny Boone. Im the new teacher here.
Ross: I can't believe this, she's our daughter! That you would treat her like some kind of showdog is inexcusable!
MR. GELLER: Look, I know what you're going through. When I turned 50 I got the Porsche. You... you got your own little speedster.
Chandler: (with his mouth full) What happened? Im just eating candy.
Monica: You went to one where you were popular, and you got to ride off Chips motorcycle, and wear his letterman jacket. I went to one where I wore a band uniform they had to have specially made.
Rachel: Oh god. Oh, am I being like a total laundry spaz? I mean, am I supposed to use like one machine for shirts and another machine for pants?
Ross: Shes going in. Wait! Hes going in! Hes going in!! The doors closed! I, I cant see anything but the door closed!!
Monica: That is a wonder. So tell me something, Mom. If you had to do it all over again, I mean, if she was here right now, would you tell her?
Phoebe: I like our way. Oh! (Grabs a piece and jumps a bunch of Joeys like in Checkers.) Chess!
Rachel: I know! I know, its such a huge, life-altering thing.
Rachel: Oh my God, I cant believe this is a real $20,000 check, oh this is just so exciting.
Monica: Ross, Rachel promised it would be over by now. We seriously have to go, if we want to get to Vermont. I called them and the last train leaves in a half hour.
Joey: Well, I've never been through the tunnel myself, 'cause as I understand it, you're not allowed to go through with more than one girl in the car, right. But, it seems to me it's pretty much like anything else, you know, face your fear. It have a fear of heights, you go to the top of the building! If you're afraid of bugs.....get a bug. Right. In this case, you have a fear of commitment, so I say you go in there and be the most committed guy there ever was.
Rachel: (opening the door) Y'know what, I want you to leave! Get outta here!
Chandler: Honey, it is not a date! I havent talked to her in ten years! You cant just call up somebody you havent talked to in ten years and ask them for a favor. There are rules, yknow? You gotta, you got to put in some time.
Rachel: Well, this is really awkward (staring at the floor) Oh, and I can leave!
Amy: Well, I don't need you to help me, because I already know what I'm going to do with my life.
CHANDLER: I'm sorry. �That's the one thing I can't do.� I promised I'd be with Monica.
Chandler: Why dont you go up on stage. Ill get a picture of you doing the speech.
Chandler: (entering) Okay. Okay. All right. Help! Am I a Mark, or a John?
Rachel: No! Forget it! I am not gonna ask Frank to give you one of his kids!!
Phoebe: (knocking and entering) Hey. Look, I know youve been really depressed lately, so I brought someone over to cheer you up. Right outside this door is a real, live, furry playmate.
Chandler: Look, Im just gonna be across the hall, we can still do all the same stuff.
Joey: Oh Rachel look, don't say that, I think you just need a hug from Joey. Come on. Come on. (She hugs him and Joey looks out the window.) She's back! Hot girl's back!
Rachel: I wouldn't worry about it. She's always coming up with stuff like this, and you know what? She's almost never right.
Mr. Treeger:: Ahh, thanks but no. You see I-I think Im ready to dance with girls.
Joey: No, but I hear lyme disease is open, so... (crosses fingers)
(Notices Ross looking at him and stops. Ross gives him his 'quiet down' maneuver. Okay, this may take a while to explain, so center this on you screen and place your hands about a foot apart with your fingers together and pointing straight up. Now take you fingers and point them at the other hand and making a 90-degree angle with each of your hands and the first knuckle counting up from the wrist. Now take your right hand, no your other right (that was for the dyslexics), and lower it a couple of inches, so that the fingers are pointing at your wrist. Now take your arms and keeping the elbows bent and your hands in front of you spread out your arms, kinda like making a bird's wing. Now hunch your shoulders over and move you hands up and down as if you are trying to tell some one to turn it down. That's Ross 'quiet down' maneuver. Well, there is an accompanying face, but I don't want to try and describe it as well.)
Chandler: Okay, look, Im gonna have to ask you all to leave.
Rachel: Don't look at me I never get his jokes.
Mrs. Burkart: (singing) ...emblem of the land I love. The home of....
Joey: Oh Monica, listen, I ah, I saw down at the hardware store, they got those designer tiles on sale. If you ever want to redo the bathroom floor.
Joey: Nooo. I had a story all worked out but then Chandler sold me out.
Phoebe: Sure! Look, ok, bottom line: I love Mike... David! David. I love David. Don't look at me that way, Roseanne Rosannadanna!
Rachel: Dont say anything. I dont wanna speak, I dont wanna think. I just want you to take me and kiss me and make love to me right here, right now.
Phoebe: As a matter of fact she said that's how I am going to die. (pause ) So, excuse me for being a little skittish.
Joey: Well (taking his cell phone out of a pocket) I’m wanna hear it, because she keeps doing this.
Chandler: You hear that! That is her chose, mister Ill let you have her! I win! You suck! I rule all! A mini-wave in celebration of me!! (does the wave.)
Mr. Posner: You have a very impressive resume, Ms. Green. I especially like what I see here about implementing a new filing system.