words in movies
Chandler: (to Ross) All right listen, I have to go to the bathroom, but if the place with the big fish comes up again. Id like know whether thats several big fish or just one big fish.
Phoebe: Yeah, that was Leslie calling again to see if we can get back together. Thats the twentieth time today! And good luck Leslie!
Ross: Well, Im sorry, but ah, look if youre not working with him anymore, why do you have to still do stuff with him?
Rachel: Okay, well if I stop playing with Joey and Chandler, can I play with Mark?
Phoebe: Okay, well if I was in this for the money, Id be a millionaire by now, y'know. You just got to get out of that jingle head sweetie.
Rachel: Y'know if what I do is so lame, then why did you insist on coming with me this morning? Huh? Was it so I just wouldnt go with Mark?
Ginger: Its okay if it bothers you. Really. I mean the only thing I need to know is: How much it bothers you? because I dont like wasting my time. Am I wasting my time?
Phoebe: No, look, I told you that I didnt want you to try and sell it, and you just, you big fat did it anyway. God, y'know what, I think five years ago I probably wouldve done anything to play with you but, I can do it by myself. And if I cant trust you then just forget it.
Joey: No! No. Umm, just myself and if they dont like me for(Laughs.) Im sorry I couldnt even get through that.
Phoebe: No, and so there's no one to walk me down the aisle and... well, I would just really love it if you would do it.
Chandler: His legs flail about as if independent of his body!
DIRECTOR'S ASSISTANT: Hey Sal, Jerry wants to know if the monkey's ready for the subway set?
Monica: Now? Is it okay if I go out with Chip Matthews?
Ross: So when I came in here to see if you wanted to maybe start things up again, you were engaged to my best friend.
Phoebe: Happy Holidays. Feliz Navidad. Allo, and Merry Christmas. (A man put some change in her bucket.) Ohh thank you sir. Here's some joy. (She waves her hand up and down as if she is spreading joy.)
Chandler: I hope you know what Im giving up for ya, because shes not just the boss in your office, if you know what I mean.
Eric: Well if I didnt have sex with you, I had sex with someone that looked an awful lot like
Rachel: (talking on the phone) C'mon Daddy, listen to me! All of my life, everyone has always told me, 'You're a shoe! You're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe!'. And today I just stopped and I said, 'What if I don't wanna be a shoe? What if I wanna be a- a purse, y'know? Or a- or a hat! No, I don't want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying that I am a ha- It's a metaphor, Daddy!
Chandler: Its possible. You are very loveable, Id miss you if I broke up with you. (Ross glares at him) I was just trying to be supportive.
Joey: No way! Kay look, if I have to go to the doctor for anything its gonna be for this thing sticking out of my stomach! (Rolls over and shows Chandler.) Why did I have to start working out again? (Looks at the weights he was using.) Damn you 15s!
Ross: No, no, no. Technically the... sex is not... being had, but that's... see, that's not the point. See, um, the point is that... Rachel and I should be, er, together. You know, and if you get in the.... um...
Monica: So if everyone liked it, and you liked it, that would make this a success. Which would make you
Pete: Well if youre asking me to quit, then youre asking me to be someone Im not. Ive got to do this.
Joey: Hey, wouldn't be cool if our duck and chick had a little baby? We could call it Chuck.
Ross: You know what the scariest part is? What if there's only one woman for everybody, y'know? I mean what if you get one woman- and that's it? Unfortunately in my case, there was only one woman- for her...
Rachel: C'mon Daddy, listen to me! It's like, it's like, all of my life, everyone has always told me, 'You're a shoe! You're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe!'. And today I just stopped and I said, 'What if I don't wanna be a shoe? What if I wanna be a- a purse, y'know? Or a- or a hat! No, I'm not saying I want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying I am a ha- It's a metaphor, Daddy!
Alice: Dont get me started. (To Phoebe) Anyway, umm, since there are three babies and umm, we both got to put our names in, we would be truly honoured if you named the other boy baby.
Chandler: (nods his head) Do you mind if we stick you in another cabinet? (to Joey) They seem all right with it!
ROSS: No, there is no way he was a velociraptor. No Tony, look at the cranial ridge, OK. If Dino was a velociraptor, he would have eaten the Flintstones. Yeah, yeah. [Monica comes out of her room] Oh, were you takin' a nap?
Rachel: (sighs) If I said I was, would you judge me?
Joey: All right! Ill try! But if I cant, you can stay with Chandler and I until you get settled.
Monica: Yeah, well I might be if I had the supplies! I mean, I could do all this stuff. Only I don't.
Janine: Well I did. I really did. And you guys, Ive got to say, Im sorry if I was a little weird after the last time we went out. I guess I was just nervous or something.
Monica: Okay, if Joey does the ceremony, then we have to find someone else to walk Phoebe down the isle.
Chandler: Hey, listen, I'm sorry about this afternoon, y'know, if I would've known you guys were... I never would've...
Gunther: I don't know if you heard about what happened between me and Phoebe the other day_
Joey: Um-hmm! Look, I-I-I don't know how much more of this I can take! Did you know he taped over my Baywatch tape with some show about bugs! My God! What if that had been porn?
Monica: (starting to cry) Im a good person. And Im a good chef, and I dont deserve to have marinara sauce all over me! Yknow what, if you want me to quit this bad, then all you have to do is
Phoebe: Okay! It's worth it, if it will get you moving. You haven't worked in months.
Chandler: Yeah, if that was true, gym class would've been a lot more interesting.
Pete: One meal! Thats all Im asking for. Please? We go out, we eat, and if you dont have a good time, I give you ten grand, we call it even.
Phoebe: There you go, that's the spirit! Okay! Now, if you need money, I will lend you money, but just get moving!
Chandler: But if we win, we get your apartment.
Chandler: (interrupting) All right, hold on! If you win, we give up the birds.
Chandler: Hey now besides, if worst comes to worst, Ill be your boyfriend.
Chandler: (in a deep voice) If I broke up with you, Id miss you.
Monica: I got it! How about, if we win, they have to get rid of the rooster?
Joey: Check the freezer. If theres none in there, then were probably out. Are you just getting in from work? Its late.
Ross: Its okay if he bumps his head, kids bump their heads all the time, y'know, it was your first time babysitting, I figured you did the best you could.
Pete: Could you leave a note? Cause Im on a lot of pain killers now, and I dont know if Ill remember this tomorrow. (She leaves.)
Kathy: Checking to see if its even.
Kathy: Im sorry. If you wanna pretend that nothing happened, I can try.
Chandler: So explain something to me here, uh, what kind of a relationship do you imagine us having if you already have a husband and a boyfriend?
Phoebe: After that? Yeah! No, I mean if I can help.
Ross: Come on, I think this is a good thing. I dont think Mom wouldve hired you if she didnt think you were good at what you do.
Monica: Hey Ross, maybe if your skin was lighter. Your teeth wouldnt look so bright.
Chandler: (lying) Yes, but if its any consolation, before the bird dropped it, he seemed to enjoy it.
Ross: Look, you can't do this Mon. All right, if you do this, I'm, I'm gonna, I'm, I'm gonna.....
Tim: If that helps you.
Ross: Okay, okay. If that is what it takes to show you how much you mean to me, and how much I want you there. Then that's what I'll do.
Phoebe: See? And you don't care if people are staring, it's just for a second cause then you're gone!
Phoebe: Hey Mon umm, if you do get married, can I bring two guests?
Ross: Okay, well, if she always behaves like this, why don't you say something?
Chandler: We were playing Gin? Y'know if we were a couple, we could play this game naked.
Joey: Ah, can I just say I know we're doing this for Ross, and that's cool, but if it was up to me, this is not what we'd be doing on our first date.
Joey: Yeah. And look, I just want you to know that with Rachel staying here and everything, all my feelings from before are totally over, okay? And even if they weren't, when you accidentally walk in on a woman using a breast pump...
Monica: Ah, well if you dont clear this off, you wont be getting one of those from me. But Bens coming over here tomorrow to play this game, this cant be there.
Joey: No, its okay, but if Im Marge, my breasts are coming out my back.
Phoebe: Ok, somebody is on their way to ruin wedding okay. And I have to warn somebody, alright. So if you dont give me that number then Im going to come over there and kick your snooty ass all the way to New Glocken..shire.
Phoebe: If shes no fun, why do you want to date her at all?
Chandler: Its a big company, I dontif youI
Joey: So let me get this straight. If you go with Bonnie tonight, youre doing the smart, healthy thing and moving on.
Joey: Yeah, well, that's fine, but the important thing is that I finished it. And uh, I think it's really good, but y'know it'd really help me is if I could hear it. So would you guys read it for me?
Monica: Oh, um, I dont know if thats a good idea.
(As they change places, they give each other the now patented Ross maneuver. If you dont know what that means, click here to find out The One With Joey's New Girlfriend.)
Monica: Well if you want a problem? Ill give you a problem!
Chandler: (Slightly panicky) Yeah, but what if it's not? What if there is a reason why we can't have a baby?
Joey: No, Pheebs, listen, if you decide to do this, well be supportive like crazy.
Monica: God! If youre gonna cry about it! (She grabs the box and goes to through it out.]
David: Yes I can. Because if I go it means I have to break up with you, and I can't break up with you.
Bobby: You bet I am! (To Joey) And to answer your earlier question, were straight-up gangster rap. (Joey shakes his head as if hes about to lose it.)
Chandler: Well you might if it were anything like 7!
Chandler: Yes! And look, now that I know if I got some extra stuff lying around can we, can we share the closet.
Monica: How about if I dance around all covered in sauce? Huh? You think its funny now?
Ross: Now that is funny. Hey, do you think...would it be too weird if I invited Carol over to join us? 'Cause she's, she's alone now, and pregnant, and, and sad.
Kathy: If you want it to be.
Phoebe: If you wanted to punish them, you shouldve just made them hang out here!
Ross: No! No! It would be weird if we were still in that place, I mean are you still in that place?
MONICA: A salad? Really I, I could do something a little more complicated if you like.
JOEY: Well if he's not gonna eat it, I will.
Rachel: So if you think I didn't say goodbye to you because you don't mean as much to me as everybody else, you're wrong. It's because you mean more to me.
Rachel: Oh, I have to pee. If I dont come out in five minutes its because Ive choked to death on the potpourri stink. (Goes into the bathroom.)
Chandler: Listen, in the middle of everything if I scream the word, "Yippee!" just ignore me.
PHOEBE: Yeah, I agree. Ya know, I think fancy parties are only fun if you're fancy on the inside and I'm just not sure we are.
Phoebe: Well, if you think it will help.
Monica: Yeah. And yknow, if you wanna cry, thats okay too.
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Phoebe are there reading. Rachel is sitting on the couch flanked by Ross and Monica. She suddenly stops reading and starts blinking her left eye as if it's bothering her. The problem is that Joey is on her left and thinks she's winking at him and winks back. Ross is watching this and isn't quite sure of what to make of it.]
Phoebe: Yeah, but theres a two-year wait. And then what if you get engaged in two years and then you got to wait another two years for this place. Thats four years. Chandlers not gonna wait that long. Hes gonna find somebody else, yknow? Someone, someone who did put their name on the list. (Rachel agrees.)
Ross: Y'know if we ever go to war and youre captured, youre in for a big surprise.
Ross: Sure! Oh, and Joeys got the mashed potatoes if you want to exchange them.
Monica: All right look, if I take Chandler out of the running will you be able to focus?
Chandler: Well y'know, what if she didnt actually sleep with the guy?
Joey: Thanks man, but I think it makes a stronger statement if I ask for it myself, y'know.
Chandler: Let me tell you why you need to pick me. (Goes to sit on the couch facing backwards to the kitchen. Rachel gets a chair and sits opposite him) See, when I was a kid, I was always left out of everything, you know, and it really made me feel... insecure. You know, I was always picked last in gym. Even behind that big fat exchange student who didn't even know the rules to baseball. I mean, this guy would strike out and then run to third. Anyway, If I'm the only one left out of this wedding, I just know that all those feelings are gonna come rushing back.
Rachel: What if I clean your bathroom for a month?
Ross: Look, I-I dont want to miss anymore baby stuff. So Here. Heres my new pager number, okay? Anytime anything pregnancy related happens use it! Ill be there! Okay? I dont care if its three in the morning and all you want is ice cream.
Joey: If you didnt want to play, why did you come to the party?
Rachel: Chandler, thats not enough. I mean what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents, and a bunch of little presents? And youve just gotten her one great present? I mean thats just gonna make her feel bad. Why would you do that to her Chandler? Why? Why?